Written by the Moon

38~ HER

I arrived at the mansion with one thing in my mind. To end my sufferings. To end his and just live a life were we both won't have to settle for our misplaced feelings. Dumiretso ako sa aking silid. Sa lalim ng gabi, halos wala na akong makita sa loob ng aking kuwarto.

I locked myself in my room. The doors to the balcony, closed. My windows, closed. Darkness has creeped in every corner of my room.

I began to elicit light from my hand, summoning the sacred paper. Ilang beses ko 'tong pinagsanayan at palaging nahihirapan ako ngunit ngayon, hindi pa nagtagal ang limang segundo, I was able to summon the sacred paper as well as my relic like it knew what's in my mind.

The Goddess of the Moon must have known that I'll bump into Forest and Zafeya in the forest so, she encouraged me to go. Maybe, it was a slap of reality. The Goddess just gave me a reality check.

I placed the paper on my bedside table and sat on a single chair. With heart beating, determined for my mission, I started writing down. The Goddess did a good job to give me a reality check.

I was hesitating. Because I didn't want to completely lose him but now, realizing, even if I force myself to have him, I can't. In the first place, we weren't meant to be. It's a shame that I once thought I will have him.

Seeing him happy with Zafeya earlier in the forest made me think my position. Wala akong panghahawakan sa kan'ya. Nakita ko kung paano siya ngumiti at tumawa habang kasama sila ni Zafeya. He looked content and happy.

His smile wasn't fake for me. He enjoyed the time with Zafeya. So, why would I think of destroying such grrat bond? Who am I to even think about taking Forest away from her? I am just an Angel here to serve him. To give him the best for his love.

Wala nang bakas na panginginig sa aking kamay. Matagal na noong hindi pa ako nanginginig sa pagsulat. It must be because my heart is in favor for this. My heart wants what is good for him. Hindi ako 'yon. Si Zafeya 'yon.

Kapal ng mukha kong umasa pa. I smiled bitterly as I finished my writing on the sacred paper.

The Second Writing

For love is what the heart chose. For love is what the eyes want and the soul seeks. Forest Castriel Alcazar will finally look only for Zafeya Chidrome. The confusion he has weighed for a long time shall vanish as he is for Zafeya and Zafeya is for him. Time will consume the days and weeks but his love for Zafeya Chidrome will be in bloom for all the next days.

Eloise Naveah Acadian

I took a deep breath as I signed the sacred paper without a doubt. I was determined. My heart was sure and I have never felt so sure before. Even if it hurt, my intentions are all for the benefit of Forest. He is now a man who only devotes love for Zafeya. He will embrace that in him. And one day, I will witness the love and bond I have strengthened.

I smiled but bitterly. My eyes witnessed how the ashes of the sacred paper turned to gold and thw wind played with it as it made it's way outside of my room, to the small opening of my window.

Labag ito noon sa akin pero sa isang tanaw ko lang kay Forest at Zafeya biglaang nagbago ang aking isipan. It took one snap or rather slap for me to realize what I have been doing wrong.

Humiga ako sa aking kama habang tinitignan ang kisame. Hindi parin ako makapaniwala na gano'n-gano'n ko lang siyang nagawa. Na parang wala! Na paramg binalewala ko lang ang aking damdamin. Did I even have any secind thoughts before signing the sacred paper? No!

I yawned as I thought about Forest and my mission. Everyone is doing fine with theirs and here I am done with my second writing. Siguro nasa pangsampu na sila o higit pa.

Unti-unting nilalamon na ako ng antok nang may kumatok sa aking pintuan. My senses already knew who it is. I didn't have to say anything at pumasok sa agad si Mark pagkatapos ng kan'yang pagkatok.

I raised a brow at him with my sleepy eyes. I'm already curled to bed and he's in his pajamas too. He sat quietly on my bed as he looked around my room.

"You did a successful writing?"

Matamlay akong tumango, inaantok na.

"Oo."

"You went outside of your room. Did something happened?" Nakatingin na ito sa akin. Ang mata puno ng pag-alala.

I smiled. Ngiting nalulungkot.

"Nakita ko sila, Mark."

He shifted from his position. He turned to my direction more.

"You went to the river," he concluded as his eyes went to my wet hair.

"They looked perfect. Ang sama ko naman para patagalin pa ang pagtatatag sa kanilang bond."

"Just take your time, Nav. Don't rush nor pressure yourself."

"Kailangan, Markus."

Umismid ang mukha nito nang banggitin ang buong pangalan.

"Seryoso ako."

"Seryoso din naman ako," nakkta niya ang pagiging seryoso ko at napatango nalang ito.

"What's your plan?"

I shrugged.

"Hurting myself more."

"Nav,"

"It's the only way. I need to get rid of his feelings for me."

Umiling ito. Tutol na tutol sa desisyon ko.

"Pwede mo naman 'yang gawin na hindi sinasaktan ang sarili," napataas na ang boses nito.

Napangiti ako. Markus the concerned brother. Oo nga naman, tama sj Markus. But there's no other way for me to do my mission effectively. Hindi na importante ang nararamdaman ko. Basta mawala lang ang nararamdaman no Fotest para sa akin, panatag na ako.

Just his safety and I'm fine. The Goddess can punish me or whatever for loving him as long as he has lost his feelings for me.

Napagtanto kong mas importante na si Forest. Hindi na importante ang aking sarili. As long as he'll luve peacefully with a wife and children then I'm happy. Letting it go is hard but seeing him happy one day even if it hurts, I will be supportive of him.

"Kung patatagalin ko 'to, mapapahamak lang kaming dalawa. It's better this way."

Napabuntong hininga si Mark. He looked in pain hearing my decisions. Alam kong hindi siya sang-ayon but this is final. This was my first decisyand will stay till I leave this place.

Bringing Forest a strong bond with Zafeya will happen.

"Masakit ba?" He asked out of the blue.

I pouted. He saw my pout and he knew my answer immediately.

"Sino naman ang hindi masasaktan sa ganitong sitwasyon?" Lumiliit ang boses ko.

"Ganoon mo siya kamahal?"

"Love is a strong word for us."

"Then what?"

I sighed.

"Anything just not love,"

"Love affair?"

My brows furrowed.

"We don't have that," I pointed out.

"Puupy love."

"Siya lang aso sa aming dalawa."

He laughed at my words. Kahit makita man sa mukha nito ang pagtawa, his eyes wouldn't lie. Alam kong alalang-alala na siya sa akin. Ngayon ko lang din napansin na mas pipiliin niya ako. He doesn't really carr about Forest in this situation na ikinabigla ko naman. He's the type to care so much even to people he doesn't know of. Pero mukhang iba na ata kapag damay na ako. Parang may humaplos sa aking puso.

Without Markus, hindi ko ata alam kung anong mangyayari sa akin. Baka matagal na akong namatay dito. I smiled as I saw him stood up.

"If you're in trouble, just tell me, Nav."

I nodded.

Tahimik naman siyang umalis sa aking silid. I appreciate everything Mark is doing for him. Hindi ko man sinasabi sa kan'ya pero ramdam ko talaga ang pagbabantay sa akin. He has done so much for me. I sighed. Kapag nakauwi na kami sa Paredes, ako naman babawi.

Babawi ako.

Umagang-umaga bubgad agad sa akin ay sina Forest at Zafeya. Napalugmok na lamang ako sa aking higaan nang sinabi sa akin ni Tiana ang sitwasyon sa ibaba.

Sham and Jedi invited Forest and Zafeya for breakfast. I mean, hindi naman 'to ang unang pagkakataon. It's just, I'm freaking moving on! Tas may epal?!

I sighed heavily as I finished my bath. Tinagalan ko talaga ang pagligo. Nagbabasakala ako na umuwi na rin sina Forest. Sana nga.

Lumabas ako sa kuwarto at naglakad na papuntang dining area. Alas nuwebe naman ng umaga kaya baka umuwi na rin. Hindi naman ako aasa na hihintayin pa nila ako. Hindi naman ako importante.

I went downstairs and got to the dining area. Napabuntong hininga na lamang ako nang makita na hindi pa nga sila nagsimulang kumain. Gusto ko nalang bumalik sa aking silid at magmukmok.

Pumasok na ako sa dining room at agad ko namang nakuha ang kanilang atensyon. Lalo na si Zafeya.

"Nav! I've haven't seen you in a while!" She sounded excited.

I smiled at her. Sinisikap kong siya lang ang tignan ko, hindi ang katabi niya.

"Did some important... stuff."

Napalingon si Mark sa akin. He tapped at the vacant seat besiuhim which is also in front of Forest's seat. I gave him a smug look. Ngumiti lang ito na nagpapasensya.

"It's the only seat available for now," he whispered to me.

I only sighed. Kumain na nga kami nang dumating ako. Mas maganda sana ang agahan ko kung wala dito ang tao sa harap ko. I've haven't had any eye contact with him today.

"You know what, I noticed, your clothes are usually dresses in white. It suits you very well, Nav," biglaan naman ang compliments ni Zafeya.

I just had to smile politely.

"I'm comfortable with it."

"Your pale skin matches them perfectly," she had her sweet voice. I suddenly feel envious for a moment.

"Thank you."

My eyes unconsciously went to Forest. Like it knew where I want to look it. But when I looked at his direction, he was in so much adoration at Zafeya.

Ang mga malalim nitong mata ay nakapocus lamang kay Zafeya. Para bang sinasamba niya ito.

I swallowed hard and realized my writing has been effective. And starting today, he will finally only look at Zafeya.

Only her.

To be continued...