Written by the Moon

44~LIES

Marami kaming napagdesisyonan. I had to train more since my life is in danger. Security has improved. Wala akong takas no'ng gusto nila na may bodyguards ako. There are a lot of assumptions right now but I will focus more on protecting myself physically.

And by that, I mean, I have to stay a live. If I die, then Forest life will be in dabger too. Kailangan kong mabuhay hanggang sa matapos ko ang misyon ko.

The exams are coming kaya mas lalo lang akong naabala. I had to practice my next writing again. I lot has been in my plate pero kakayanin ko.

Mabilis akong naglakad patungi sa department namin. The department of the Witches and Wolves are separated. Nagpasalamat ako do'n. Pero may mga paraan talaga si Forest. He can come to our department anytme he wants.

Advantages if being a noble, I guess. Napabuntong hininga na lamang ako nang makita ulit siya malapit lang sa aming cafeteria. Kasama na naman niya si Zaf pero sa akin naman nakatingin.

I don't know if he's just looking at me because of what recently happened or he's feelings hasn't fully faded. Kahit gano'n, na gusto ko na kami nalang sana, ayoko.

Paulit-ulit ko 'tong sasabihin. Mabuting tao si Zaf at ang kapal ng mukha ko kung sasaktan ko siya, kung sasaktan namin siya ni Forest.

I went straight to the cafeteria. Bahagya akong lumingon kay Forest. I sighed that he's looking at Zaf now. Hindi ko talaga maintindihan ang sarili. I get hurt just thinking that he has forgotten his feelings for me but then be relieved that he's doing well with Zaf. Napailing ako sa sarili.

Hinanap ko ang lamesa nina Mark at doon na umupo. They've been busy too for the exams this week. Hindi na nga nito pinapansin ang pagkain at nakatutok na sa libro. Halos lahat ata dito sa cafeteria gano'n.

"I can't believe I'm studying for this," sabi ni Jedi habang nasa nata ang libro.

"Diba dapat nasa misyon lang ang atensyon natin? Ano ng nangyari?" si Sham na katulad din kay Jedi.

I smiled at their state. I really don't care if I pass this semester. It's the least of my priority. Mas priority ko na si Forest. Ako ang nakahawak sa buhay niya.

Kumain lang ako habang sila naman babad na babad sa libro. Mukhang mga walang tulog pa. I looked at the clock and it's almost time for tye next class.

Napagdesisyon ko na din na mag-aral ng konti. Mag-effort nalang din ako. Nahihiya ako sa mga kasama ko. But the environment in the cafeteria just seemed so depressing kaya lumabas na ako dala ang mga libro. I figured out it's perfect to study in the field.

Mahangin at walang tao. It's peaceful. I sat at one of the bleachers and opened a book. Nakapandekuwtro ako habang nagbabasa. The silent breeze if the wind comforted me.

While nourishing some lessons on the book, nakaramdam na lang ako na may umupo sa tabi ko. Hindi ko man lingunin, alam ko na kung sino.

Despite that, I still focused on the book. Nandito ako para mag-aral. Hindi ang maapektohan kay Forest.

The wind blew flawlessly that Forest's scent waved with it hitting my face. Kaya ayon, ang bango at nakakatempt na naman. Napabuntong hininga na lamang ako. At mukhang napalakas ko 'yon.

"Having trouble?"

"No," diretsa kong sagot.

"You love nature since you seem to vibe with it," pinagmasdan nito ang kapaligiran namin.

"I just hate people."

He chuckled at my words.

"The same way you hate me?"

Napaikot ang mata ko habang nagbabasa.

"Stop it, Forest."

"Sorry. You didn't wear the bracelet I gave you."

Napalunok ako. Iniiwasan ko siya sa nga nagdaang araw dahil alam kong itatanong niya ang tungkol dito. I sighed heavily.

"I took it off, obviously."

"That was supposed to protect you," rinig ko ang hindi mawari na toni sa boses niya.

Napakurap kurap ako. I breathed out an amount of air. Tinuru ko sa kan'ya ang mga bodyguards ko na nasa malayo kang sa akin, nagbabantay.

"Kita mo 'yan? Sila ang po-protekta sa akin."

"Is it bad if I want to protect you too?"

I licked my lips. Ang dami namang tanong.

"I just don't need it from you."

He paused for a while. Mariin akong tinitigan nito. He looked at me with those brooding eyes. Deep and mysterious ones yet gentle to look at. For a moment I was mesmerized by his eyes. I just had to look away when it intensified.

"Are you... sure?" he asked slowly.

Napalunok ako. Why do I feel like he's waiting for me to lie?

"Y-yes," I lied, I thought.

Tumango ito. Nanatiling nakatitig parin sa akin. He looked like he's been figuring out what's in my mind. I blinked a couple of times before looking away.

"Where's the bracelet?"

I shrugged but my shoulders were shaking.

"Tiana has it."

"Nag-away ba kayo dahil sa akin?"

I looked at him. He's asking but he looks like he knows the answer already.

"Hindi naman," another lie.

Tumango iti ulit. He just looked so puzzled at me. Para bang nalilito siya if I was really saying the truth.

"Wear it. I want to see you wear it."

"Do you want the world to know that you're smitten on me?" I raised a brow at him

He smirked. Ngunit ang mata nito puno ng pighati.

"If only I could, Naveah."

The smirk that was already forming on my lips died. Hindi ko inasahan ang sagot niya. Akala ko, sasabayan kang niya ang biro ko pero hindi ko inasahan na seseyosohin niya. Per kahit gano'n, 'yong ouso ko. 'Yong puso ko tuloy ang nabaliw.

Kumikibo ang labi ko pero kahit isang salita walang lumalabas sa bibig ko. I was speechless. I was convincing myself that he's on the stage kf moving on that I failed to realize that he might... just might be in the same page as me.

Napalunok ako nang ngumiti ito sa akin. Like he got me. Realizing it, napaiwas ako ng mata. Damn this.

"You're not good with your jokes."

"Sa tingin mo, joke 'yon?"

Nakangiti parin ito kaya binaba ko na lamang ang mata sa aking libro.

Joke or not, you are only allowed to talk like that with Zaf. Hindi ako, Forest."

The things I do to save him will kill me.

Tumango ito. He gets it. Napabuntong hininga ako at tumayo na. Hindi ko kaya na magtagal pa dito. Ayoko. It seems like it will only make me suffer more. Oo, kikiligin ako pero magdudusa rin naman ako sa huli. So, what's the use?

Nang aamba na sana ako paalis, he held my arm. It was a gentle hold. Lumingon ako sa kan'ya at tinaasan siya ng kilay.

"Let's be close friends."

"I told you that I can only be civil."

"Friends then?"

I swallowed hard. Friends. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang totong intensyon niya dito. He wants us to be friends? Akala ko okay lang sa kan'ya ng ganito na na pagtrato?

I looked at him straight. There's this longing and sorrow in his eyes that he rarely reveal. I pursed my lips.

"In one condition."

Agad itong tumango.

"Love her. This time, sincerely and truthfully," I meant this but I could feel my heart bleeding.

His jaw dropped. He looked away for a moment and then looked back at me. Tumitig ito sa akin ng mariin.

"Gusto ko rin gawin 'yon, Nav. Mahirap," now, I could hear the pain dripping from every word he spoke.

"Alam kong mahirap pero kailangan 'to,"

"You can't relate cause you don't feel the same right?"

Natigilan ako. I licked my lips as nervous shivers went to every corner of my body. Tumango ako ng marahan.

"Yes," another lie for today.

To be continued...