Sweet Little Lies

I watch as Ajax wades in the waist-deep water, making his shirt cling to his body. We've known each other our whole lives, but every time I look at him I'm awed by how beautiful he is. I quickly look away before he notices me watching him again. When he does catch me, his bright blue eyes stare straight at me and I end up blushing and usually stumble over my feet. Fishing with my brother and Ajax has been a tradition since I was eight and old enough to keep up with them. We always go to the same fishing hole every summer. However, things are about to change. I have just graduated from high school and I'm going to live with my aunt in Flagstaff, Arizona. I'll be starting my accounting degree at Northern Arizona University this fall. It's not too far from Montana, but it's still going to be a huge change. Lost in thought, I cast my line. I don't want to think about not being here. The only good I can see coming from this is that my brother won't be watching my every move. It started in 6th grade, when Bradley Martin asked me to be his girlfriend. Since then, Dan and Ajax have made it impossible for me to date. They threaten or beat up guys that show an interest in me. Not that I really care. Ajax is the only one I want. You could say I'm waiting for him. The way he looks at me, I think he wants me too. He's three years older than me, but that doesn't matter. I know Ajax is my one and only now, if only he'd do something about it! I realized the boys left me completely alone and I reeled in my fishing line. I secured the hook to the rod and walked to the third bend in the river. When the fish aren't biting, I know the boys try their luck here. I see them sitting on the river bank and creep towards them, hoping to scare them. When I heard my brother growl and asked angrily, "So, you have no interest in her?" "In Harper? You've got to be kidding? Hell no, she's like my kid sister." Ajax replies, almost disgusted. "I think Jeremy is trying to start shit." Dan complains, shaking his head. "You know me better than that," Ajax mutters. "Yeah, you're right. Sorry." Ajax shrugs and my heart breaks. I lean against the tree I'm hiding behind and wipe my tears away. I can't let them see me like that. I moved quietly and walked back to the first fishing hole. I'm such a moron. What was I thinking? Ajax can have anyone he wants. Why would he settle for me? He wouldn't. He has everything, looks, money, and he's funny. I've made it all up in my head, simply delusional. All wishful thinking, as Ma would say. I'm too young for him, obviously. Kid sister! Ugh! I heard them making their way back to me ten minutes later and heard my fishing pole on the ground. I stripped down my swimsuit and dived in the water, hoping to hide my tears. "Harp, you ready to go back?" Dan asked. "I'm going to swim a bit longer." "Alright, be home by five." He replies, sternly. "What happens at five?"I questioned, suspiciously. "You're leaving for four years. What do you think Ma's planning?" I groan and slap the water, great. "Fine, I'll be there." "You're such a brat. It's a party for you, try to be a little grateful." Dan scolded. "She's never liked being the center of attention." Ajax smirks. I ignore both of them and float on my back, the water drowning out their voices. I don't want to be teased by them and the words 'Kid' and 'sister' keep echoing in my head. After another twenty minutes of floating, I stood up and started walking to the riverbank. I climbed out and put my clothes on over my wet swimsuit. I walked back to the farmhouse ready to fake a smile. No one will ever know how hurt I am. I walked through the back door, Ma was cooking at the stove. Her hair and makeup done perfectly. "Sweety, I know you don't like parties, but---" She said, turning to me with a broad smile. "We're having a going away party for you!" She says, excitedly. My mom lives to throw parties. I love that it makes her happy. I just wish it made me happy too. "Thanks." I smiled back. "I'll go get ready." I walked past the living room where Ajax and Dan were watching some hunting channels. I try not to look at them, but I feel it. I feel Ajax's eyes on me. I looked over at him, knowing what I'd found. His eyes met mine, but instead of sharing the same intense look, he quickly averted my eyes and walked up the stairs to my bedroom. I shut the door and leaned against it. One more day, just one more day until I can breathe again.