Monstrous

12

Autumn Marie Tyler

I remember waking up with the memories of last night playing endlessly in my mind, the touch, the moans, the pleasure, everything still burned bright in my mind and I could still feel last night on my skin. We were completely stripped of our clothing, I've never been so comfortable with anyone.

Nile had his arm wrapped tightly around my waist holding me securely with my back pressed against his chest. The covers were pulled over our bodies, I could feel his steady breath on my neck indicating that he was in a deep slumber. Before I made any sudden movements that would wake him, I decided to take the time to think about what he told me yesterday. The abuse, the abandonment, the suffering, it painted a gruesome picture in my mind and I never felt so protective over something, I just wanted to nurture him to help him heal. After last night I'm hoping we officially closed the hate-love situation we had going on and went into a new fresh chapter.

After taking some time to think I turned steadily in Nile's arm and faced him. Just as I thought, the small movement woke him. Exhaustion still lingered in his eyes which his hair fell down in front of. I smiled at the sight and brushed his hair back off his forehead.

"Morning" I said, caressing the back of his neck while he forced himself out of his sleep. Nile narrowed his eyes, adjusting it to the sunlight that poured into the room, he let out a soft yawn. He looked so harmless in this state.

"How are you?" He asked, looking at me with wide-open eyes, he pulled me in closer to his body. I fought to keep a straight face but I couldn't. My body was freaking out over the way he held me. My lips curled into a smile before I planted a kiss on his lips, it became so natural to me, being like this with him.

"Happy, and you?" I asked, Nile was still caught up in the fact that I kissed him, he laughed gently and nodded at me.

"At peace.." He responded softly, my fingers traced over his arm and tattoos while I kept his eyes locked in an intense gaze. I wanted nothing but to stay in this moment with him, skin to skin, wearing our hearts on your sleeves, nothing could ever feel better than this.

“Let’s go get some breakfast…” Nile said, breaking our gaze, I pouted slightly and he kissed my forehead tenderly before pulling away from me. I groaned watching him shuffle out of bed, I stared up at the ceiling and sighed deeply.

“Can’t we just stay in bed all day and talk?” I focused my attention on Nile and he was pulling up his boxers before bending down and grabbing a hold of his pants.

“No Autumn, come on.." he said, smirking at me. I rolled my eyes at the thought of having to get up. He shook his head laughing and turned away from me heading to the door. I saw light faded scars on his back and it only reminded me of what he had to go home to.

"I'll be making breakfast downstairs, come join me once you've freshen up" Once he disappeared from view I began to miss him and what we shared.

Nile Cale

I couldn't help but wonder if I had made a mistake by sleeping with Autumn. Yes it was phenomenal and like we finally let ourselves be vulnerable. A part of me felt like I was disrespecting her, worst part of it is that I didn't even use protection, I didn't want what we had to get ruined because of my issues.

"Chef Cale is always cooking something up…" Her voice alerted me and pulled me out of my doubts. I resumed equally pouring the banana smoothie I made into two cups. When I looked up, immediately I noticed Autumn wearing a pair of my sweat shorts and my long sleeve white shirt. Her hair was in a messy bun and when she came into close proximity with me I smelled her lavender scented skin and minty fresh breath.

"Well, you can barely cook something in the microwave…" I handed her the smoothie with a warmed bagel smeared in strawberry cream cheese. Autumn rolled her eyes as she turned away from me and headed into the living room. I grabbed my plate and followed her.

"Joke all you want asshole but you love making food for me" I dropped down on the couch beside her. I did like making food for her, it reminded me that I wasn't alone anymore.

"Can we talk about what I told you last night?" I asked after a quiet session of us eating our breakfast. Autumn nodded and placed her plate and mug onto the floor, I did the same.

"You can't tell anyone about what I said last night" Yes, things were different with Autumn but not with the things going on. All it takes is the wrong person to find learn about the things going on in my life and Charlie will be taken away. Autumn looked away from me and sighed, slowly her hand slipped into mine.

"I won't announce it to the whole world, but Nile I can find people who can help. My mom and dad-" She started, a scoff left my lips cutting her off, I stood up pulling out from her grasp.

"Your parents hate me, Autumn. I didn't tell you about my dad because I wanted help, I told you because I wanted you to know the real me" I paced around the living room, I took a deep breath, a million thoughts ran through my head.

"How am I supposed to sleep at night knowing you're getting abused?! You expect me to sit here and do nothing?!" Before I responded with irritance, I whipped my body around to look at Autumn. Although she screamed at me, Autumn wasn't speaking with anger but with concern. I saw the desperation in her eyes, she was seconds away from tearing up.

"I just need a year, I'll be graduating, I'll move out and get a steady job, I'll file for guardianship for Charlie that way no one could take him away from me. I just need time Autumn" There was more intricate details in my plan, of course it had a few holes but I'll get through it, I had to. Autumn wasn't convinced at all. She stood up from the couch and approached me.

"You'll become a parent at 18? Nile, what about college? Having a bright future?-" Autumn began, it caused me to brush past her and let out a forced laugh.

"Not everyone can have rich mommies and daddies to pay their way through life Autumn. A kid like me has no business in going to college-" I could already feel the tension in the room rise, I took in a deep sigh having no interest in continuing this conversation.

"I'm gonna go take a shower.." I spat, before Autumn could respond, I darted out of the room and traveled up the stairs.

Autumn Marie Tyler

"I don't want to fight Nile.." After giving him an hour to himself, I approached him. He was in the room we had woken up in on the bed scrolling through his phone. I shuffled into the room and groaned gently. Even though I didn't agree with his lifestyle choices, I didn't want to argue about it. No matter how much I feared for Nile, he knew what was best for himself, at least I hope he does.

"That wasn't a fight Autumn, we both needed space before it got into one.." Nile said, sitting up. He wore light denim jeans and a white oversized shirt. I loved being able to see his tattoos. I stood by the door not knowing what else to say to him, I wanted to kiss him and hold him. I wanted him to know that he didn't have to be alone anymore.

"Let's go on a walk.." Nile said standing up from the bed, he didn't give me a chance to respond. He smiled widely at me and latched onto my hand.

Going on the walk with Nile reminded me how much I missed the warmer months. Nile and I had on light jackets, I changed into a pair of jeans and sneakers fit for our walk. The wind was chilly but it didn't take away from how beautiful and peaceful the scenery was. The undisturbed trees standing tall, leaves falling, branches covering the forest floor, animals of all kinds of breeds roaming freely. Best part of it all was Nile leading me through it, holding onto my hand, assisting me climbing over things when necessary, making me laugh, I was ecstatic having this side to him all to myself. We were walking slowly in silence with our hands locked.

"I want to try with you.." He said, my attention was on the skyline and how the tree tops were touching the sky. My eyes found their way back to him. Was he talking about something s****l?

"Try what?" I asked with a small smile, Nile looked at me with a serious tone. His body came to a stop and I halted with him. He cleared his throat and looked at me for a several minutes, it made me anxious on what was to come.

"Be in a relationship.." He uttered, shocked to the core I gasped and I pulled my hand back away from his. This couldn't be the same Nile from the beginning of the school year. Nile let out a nervous chuckle and scratched the back of his head.

"This is all so f*****g confusing.." He said, looking away from me. He was troubled, but I understood what he was implying. I took a step towards him and placed my hands on both sides of his face forcing him to look at me.

"I would like to try that too.."

I wouldn't want to be anywhere in the world except in this place at this time with him. Nile held me close to him, with the cold settling around us, his warmth comforted me. It's like we completely stepped out of the realities we lived and created our own little world.

The rest of the time we spent there went by in a blur. We didn't have s*x for the remainder of our stay, we were too occupied with truly getting to know each other, even the darkest parts of ourselves. He told me every aspect of his life, and no matter how painful it was when Nile asked me a question, I answered. We laughed and cried together, it was beautiful. I was still in disbelief that I was able to call myself his girlfriend, it made me feel so weird but, in a good way. We both agreed that we would keep our relationship a secret as best as we could. We were not ashamed of anything, but wanted to keep what we had safe.

Nile and I left hours before everyone else did. I was reluctant to leave the cabin I grew accustomed to, this trip was everything we needed. We talked the entire drive which made time go by faster, and eventually Nile was dropping me off at home.

"I was dreading this moment.." I said faintly, I was leaning against Nile's car facing my house. It was just past five o'clock, and our trip had finally come to a conclusion. Nile, who was getting my bags from his trunk, chuckled lightly. He approached me and kissed me tenderly, I was still getting used to it.

"We aren't forbidden lovers Autumn, we can see each other whenever. I was just about to ask you if you want to go to the movies tomorrow night" My cheeks heated up from slight embarrassment, I didn't want to come off as clingy. I looked away from him and cleared my throat nodding my head.

"Of course and I'm sorry. I just don't want anything or anyone to ruin us.." I responded, Nile nodded. He looked at my house then back at me, Nile slowly brought his hand up to my cheek and caressed it with his thumb.

"Nothing will, I won't let that happen okay?" He reassured me, I leaned into his warm touch and looked up at him with a smile. Nile's grin spread across his face, cheek to cheek.

"No way in hell do I have Autumn Marie Tyler completely swooning over me" He playfully remarked, I rolled my eyes with disgust and grabbed my bag from his grasp. I wouldn't have believed it either if you told me this a few weeks ago. Although we were in a playful mood, I kept thinking about what Nile had to go back home to.

"I know you already said no when I asked you to come live with me, but, if anything happens, please come here, please.." I was desperate and the thought of him hurting made me sick. Nile placed his hands on my waist and pulled me in closer.

"I will come straight to you.." He said. I pulled Nile into a tight hug and held him for several moments. I didn't want to let go, in fear of losing him, but Nile backed me away from him.

"Go before I start to miss you.." He motioned to my house. He smirked at me, making my nerves disappear for just an instant. We parted ways, when I got onto my porch, I watched his car speed down the road until it was fully out of sight.

When I got inside my house and closed the door behind me, my mom strutted out of the kitchen to see who was at her front door. She was wearing a blue floor length maxi dress, with her hair tied up in a messy bun.

"Well you look happy, how was it?" My mother asked pulling me into a hug when I got into arms reach. I felt guilty about not telling her the truth of the trip but I knew she would never approve of me and Nile dating.

"It was okay, not that much fun" I said with a shrug. She nodded and didn't bombard me with much questions, but I did interrogate her on how she was feeling. My mom was cooking dinner so she told me to freshen up and come back down.

In my room, I thought about Nile and the amazing trip we shared that was the mere image of perfection. I wish we had stayed in that cabin forever.