Monstrous

19

                                                                             Autumn Marie Tyler

               Jealousy isn't a kind feeling, it claws at your chest and deceives you, brings out the absolute worst in you. After my meltdown in the kitchen, Nile and I retreated to my bedroom. He asked if he could take a cold shower to ease his sore muscles, I told him to take all the time in the world. I was in bed just going through his duffle bag, it seemed like he was prepared to stay the night, that rascal is lucky my mom is out for the weekend. He didn't even ask, but somehow he knew that I would want him here. Nile took eternity in the shower but eventually he came out with my towel wrapped around his waist and his fingers combing through his wet hair. Before I caught myself staring like a fool I handed Nile the sleepwear he packed which was just a short sleeved shirt and sweatpants.

                  "How did your mom enjoy the game?" He asked retreating back into the bathroom to change into his clothes, I found it cute considering I've already seen him completely naked. My mother wasn't the parent I wanted to discuss tonight so I stayed silent, when Nile came out of the bathroom fully dressed that's when I decided to change the subject.

                  "I met your dad before the game started. He seemed rather eager to introduce himself" Nile blankly stared down at me. I hated when I couldn't detect the emotions in his face, it left me pondering what he could be feeling.

                  "Did he say or do anything that made you uncomfortable?" He replied immediately, I thought back to it and shook my head with an answer. 

                    "No, he was actually nice. He was asking me if you were causing me any trouble. I was close to cussing him out but I refrained. In the end I just told him how amazing you are.." A small smirk creased the side of Nile's lips, the infamous cocky grin was beginning to emerge, my eyes rolled.

                   "I would love to hear how amazing I am.." He slurred, he pulled his duffle bag off the bed before slithering in my arms, he brought my body down onto the bed, while he was trying to be flirty and playful I wanted to maintain a serious conversation about his father. Nile hovered over me nearing a kiss to my lips, I opened my mouth and stopped him with my words.

                   "I just don't want you to get your hopes up about him only for him to hurt you again and again" I saw how Nile was ecstatic about his father being at the game and supporting him. I loved seeing him so happy but I couldn't stand to watch him get manipulated.

                  "All I ever wanted was to be seen by my father, I'm not going to forget everything he has done to me, but for once, I want to feel happy, if he is willing to try, I should too.." I had so many rebuttals in the back of my head but I decided to keep my concerns to myself for now. There was already tension between us from earlier, I didn't want to add to that, so I simply nodded my head and kissed him gently.  

                 After getting comfortable on top of me, Nile quickly fell asleep which left me alone in my thoughts in my now dark room. Tenderly, I combed my fingers through Nile's damp hair while his head rested on my chest right in between my breasts. My eyes wandered the ceiling, tracing the cracks, it made me think back to my first day of school, where I had cut my wrists opening, hoping I would die to avoid reality and its hardships. The new environment I was exposed to was brutal, heartbreaking, and difficult but there were people I met that made all of it worth it, I met, and saw the real Nile. Never in a million years did I think I would fall for him the way I did.

                                                                                      Nile Cale 

            I woke up with my face buried in Autumn's lavender scented pillow. The sound of rain droplets hitting against the window alerted me that sunshine wouldn't visit the sky today. A deep yawn escaped my lips and I rolled onto my back stretching my arms out. My body felt a whole lot better than it did last night, this was probably the most relaxed I've woken up in a really long time, with a smile on my face I turned to look at my girlfriend. Everything just felt different with her, I just wanted to stay in bed with her all day but to my surprise Autumn was nowhere in sight. I sat up slowly rubbing my eyes, looking around the vacant room. Immediately I looked towards the night stand, before I could reach my phone to call her, Autumn's phone was sitting comfortably next to mine. There wasn't any noise in the bathroom, so I concluded that she was probably prancing around this castle of hers. Before I went off to look for her, I slipped out of bed, grabbed my toothbrush from my duffle bag and proceeded to go into the bathroom. 

                     "Jesus I look like shit.." I grunted once I got a hold of my reflection in the mirror. There were visible sweat marks on my shirt, it's been a while since I had gotten night sweats, well it's been a while since I actually slept comfortably through the night. I tore off my shirt and tossed it into Autumn's laundry hamper before continuing to brush my teeth. My head hung low, spitting down into the sink while I scrubbed my teeth of the minty paste. I guess I was so caught up in brushing my teeth, I didn't hear her light footsteps with the water running. What I felt was her hands slowly coming around my waist, wrapping her arms around me. I smiled, feeling her cheek rest in the middle of my back. I rinsed out the remaining toothpaste from my mouth before turning off the water. 

                     "Morning.." She whispered against my skin, before placing a kiss along my spine. A small smirk crawled onto my lips, I brought my hands down to tear her touch off of me, I turned around and looked down at Autumn who looked bright eyed and refreshed. I wonder how long she's been up, she smelled like a soft coconut. Her hair was tied up in a messy high bun and she was draped in the flannel I had given her a while ago. I had forgotten about it, but the reminder she had given me was a sight I will never forget. 

                    "There you are.." I said looking down at her. I placed my hands underneath her arms before picking her up slightly off the ground and sitting her on the edge of the sink counter. She smiled at me as she brought her thumb to the side of my lip wiping away a bit of smeared toothpaste. 

                     "How early did you wake up?" I asked her, getting in between her legs. Autumn shrugged, tracing her fingers along my forearms. 

                      "Around ten-ish, I let you sleep while I took a shower and successfully made you breakfast" She said proud of herself with her chin held up high. I laughed softly and shook my head.

                        "What time is it now? Twelve?" I asked hoping I didn't let the food go cold, I was starving now that I'm thinking about it. Autumn shook her head bringing her palms up to my biceps. 

                         "It's three o'clock in the afternoon" I almost choked at the sudden reverse, my eyes went wide and a bunch of questions ripped through my mind but before I could ask her anything she brought her hands up to the sides of my neck. 

                        "I know I know it's late, but you were sleeping so peacefully and I figured you needed rest especially after last night's game, so I just let you sleep in" I did feel well rested, I guess I wanted to take all the time I could get to spend with Autumn since I was barely able to speak to her during the week. I didn't want to waste any more time. 

                         "A whole lot happened while you were sleeping. Come on, I'll fill you in while you eat your brunch" Autumn said without giving me any time to respond she hopped off the counter and grabbed my wrist dragging me wherever she wanted to take me. 

                        "Wait. There is going to be a hurricane?" I asked completely dumbfounded with my mouth with waffles made by Autumn which were actually pretty good. We were here sitting in her dining room while she watched me eat and filled me in on the things that happened while I was asleep. 

                        "Yeah, school is cancelled on Monday and Tuesday due to the after floods and the governor has advised everyone to stay indoors and avoid driving.." For some reason Autumn had a huge smile on her face. She sat across from me jumping in her seat all ecstatic about the incoming hurricane. I put my fork down and finished the remaining bits of waffle in my mouth before opening my mouth.

                        "Hurricanes usually bring mass destruction, yet you're happy about it because??" Autumn rolled her eyes biting her bottom lip before shooting out of her seat and running around the dining table to where I sat.

                        "Because, Mrs. Prince is making my mom stay at her house until the storm passes and we'll be here, together and alone, uninterrupted, for four days" Autumn eagerly found her way into my lap and kissed my lips that were smeared in syrup. The thought us being alone in the middle of a storm did sound comforting. I needed to make sure my mom and Charlie would be okay before celebrating the hurricane.

                          "Alright, you get the movie list going and I'll create a meal plan for the next four days" I said going along with Autumn and her enthusiasm. She squealed nodding her head before leaping off my lap and scurrying out of sight to the living room. I don't think I'll ever get tired of being around Autumn, she made me smile in ways I didn't know were possible.

                                                                              Autumn Marie Tyler 

             Seeing him happy when he woke up made me reluctant about the night he truly had. In the dead of night, I was woken up by his trembling and wines. I saw that he was completely drenched in sweat. I wanted to wake him bit something held me back from doing so. From there it only got more tumultuous, he began talking in his sleep before kicking and screaming viciously, most of his words were confusing but I only needed to hear one thing to know what he was dreaming about, his sister. During the night he screamed out her name, telling her that he was sorry, tears were streaming down his face, the sight broke me. I watched him carry on like that for hours but eventually he had calmed down, steadily, I took him into my arms and held onto him tightly. 

               After contemplating during the entirety of the first movie we watched, it was action, me and Nile just sat side by side on the couch eating up snacks we had found around the kitchen. I decided to tell him about last night, the rain poured heavier and heavier by the hour and I felt guilt drowning me. I grabbed the remote off the coffee table in front of us and paused the movie once it got to the credit scene.

              "We need to talk.." I said in a light tone, Nile who was munching down on a cookie looked at me with utter confusion. Immediately he picked up on the seriousness in my voice and swallowed the remaining bits of the cookie. We turned to face each other and from there I didn't dare to hold anything back.