opia [h.s au]

Chapter 10

A shameful moan escapes from my throat when Harry's lips molds to mine and I can feel him smiling on my lips.

As soon as our mouths connected he closed the little space left between us, crashing my body with his and pinning me up against the fridge while using his big hands to pull my body to his, being impossible close.

I kiss him back eagerly, wrapping my hands on his neck and curly hair and molding my lips to his in a frantic pace. Can't believe I am in my kitchen kissing Harry, tasting those damn lips that have haunted me for the last six months. My stomach is fluttering in expectation, his words swirling around my mind.

I f**k.

So much for playing mind gamer or trying to keep the mystery, Harry is in fact the most straight forward guy I'd ever met.

I'm not complaining, though.

Harry snaps me out of my mind when he teases his tongue in my lips and I immediately invite him in, savoring his taste while he explores my mouth with his tongue, a low groan escaping from his throat and making my core clench. Tangling my fingers in his hair, I pull his roots gently and he hums, his chest vibrating against mine. He laps his tongue in mine, pressing me against the fridge even more, it's like no closeness is enough and my entire body is shivering under his touch.

His hands leaves my waist, one of them grabbing my behind greedily, the other wrapping around my neck so he can hold my head still, deepening the kiss even more and I'm taken aback by the memories flooding my mind, the way he held me still that night and explored my body with his tongue, how hard he was for me, how my entire body felt like a sensitive nerve, being touched in all the right places and for a few seconds I forget how to breath, completely drunk on him.

Harry sucks my bottom lip inside of his mouth, nipping it lightly and I moan quietly, my head dizzy with the intensity. He breaks from the kiss, the hand he was using to hold my neck traveling to my hair and suddenly I feel a rough pull on my roots, a surprised yelp escaping from my lips when he attaches his mouth to my neck, sucking and licking the skin hungrily.

I want to touch him and feel him closer but it's like my body has disconnected from my brain, too overwhelmed with the feeling of Harry and all the sensation he is causing,

"God I missed it" He groans, sucking my earlobe between his lips and biting it slightly. "I missed the taste of your skin, is so f*****g good."

Can't find it in me to answer him so instead I force his head up and smash my lips against his again, eager to taste his tongue. The way Harry kisses is completely mind blowing and I remember thinking that he kisses like he means it back then and f**k, I was right. It's like he is trying to suck the soul out of my body, savoring every little inch of my mouth, humming in approval to each and every one of the little noises I can't contain.

The air around us is warm and I feel like my skin is on fire, every touch and every moan from Harry making my insides melt. I bite down his bottom lip, maybe putting a little more force than I should but Harry seems to like it, moaning loudly and when I open a little bit of my eyes I can see his rolling.

Harry's both hands travels down my body and he roughly grabs my ass, pulling my body from the fridge and I instinctively wrap my legs around his waist. He guide us to the kitchen counter, his hand on the bare skin of my butt making feel like I'm melting on his hands. As soon as I sit in the kitchen counter, Harry deepens the kiss with sloppy laps of his tongue against mine, it's passionate, intense and raw.

I've never been kissed like that, not even people who claimed to love me was capable of putting so much passion and eagerness into a kiss. I surely have been excited, have been horny for and with other people but it was never like that. I feel like my brain is malfunctioning and my body has developed a need of its own, like I have an itching only Harry can scratch.

He suddenly breaks from the kiss, pulling his head a little away from mine and I whine with the sudden lack of contact. I'm panting, my chest going up and down quickly and my underwear is so f*****g wet one could think I just peed myself. His chest is raising as fast as mine and he travels his hands from my back to my head and holds me still, his eyes burning holes on mine.

"f**k, Billie, I can't get enough of you" Harry's voice is even raspier than usual and the way his perfectly swollen lips moves gets me hypnotized and I hope he doesn't want to talk right now, I surely can't concentrate enough for that. "Don't know if we should do this."

Spoke to soon - now he has my entire and undivided attention.

"W-What?" I manage to stutter, my head still spinning from the kiss. What does he mean we shouldn't? For f***s sake I hate to agree with Dom but I kinda need it right now. Those spider webs aren't gonna leave my body on their own.

"Billie" Harry sighs "You're friends with Gemma and I just can't deal with that right now."

"What Gemma has to do with that?" I ask, frowning, my eyes still darting from his eyes to his lips, I just seem to be unable to resist them.

Harry frowns and I can see a million of thoughts running around his mind, his eyes are still full of lust but they're also doubtful. His hands are still holding my face and the warmth of his palm in my cheeks is welcoming and kinda soothing.

"Talk to me" I plead, covering his hands with mine and pouting a little "What's wrong?"

"Can I be completely honest with you?" He asks, raising his eyebrows to me.

I nod, starting to feel uneasy with how serious his is gaze right now, the frantic state of us making out decreasing and starting to brighten my mind.

Harry keeps looking at me, suddenly dropping his hands from my face and resting them on my knees and my skin burns under his touch, little electroshocks spreading all over my body again. Sometimes I think his touch is just too much to bear.

"Oh my god, you're killing me" I whine, rolling my eyes "Just tell me already, Jesus."

Harry chuckles before taking a sharp breath and pinning his eyes on mine again, as if he is looking into my soul.

"Right. The thing is, I don't date. And I know" He raises his voice and I open my mouth to complain "I know you don't date either and this is just us fooling around but I need to be completely straightforward with you ok? I won't get attached to you. I don't want you to think that this can be more than what I can give."

What? This b***h is tripping, I don't want anything from him, right now I just wanna f**k, jesus.

"And what is it that you think I need?" I ask him, raising my eyebrows.

"Me being at Gemma's, you being her friend, we're going to see each other on a regular basis. I just don't want you to think we will turn to some kind of couple".

"I'm not looking for a relationship, Harry" I sigh "Jesus I can't barely take care of my own and give myself enough attention, that's totally not what I'm looking for either."

"I won't be enough for you" He says matter of factly and now I'm starting to get irritated.

"Wait. Am I sending some kind of mixed signals here?" I ask abruptly, pushing Harry away and getting down from the kitchen counter, suddenly feeling the need to move "Because for all I know I was just chilling in my f*****g bed as I usually do every Friday night, watching to my favorite TV show before you showed up here to cook me the dinner I didn't ask for. So I'm sorry if at some point I gave you the I-wanna-be-your-girlfriend vibes, it wasn't my intention."

Harry's eyes widen, seemingly to be taken aback by my sudden outburst and he watches me open my fridge and take a bottle of water from the inside. I'm not even thirsty but I need to have something to touch that isn't him.

"No, I'm sorry if I made it sound like that" Harry finally says "You didn't send me any vibes, in fact I know that I'm the one pushing things a little by showing up here uninvited. It's just... f**k, I don't know, I like to be around you, and to talk to you, you're funny and smart and it's kind of a relief to have a woman that it's not my sister and I can actually talk to, but..."

"M'hoping you don't see me as a sister because things would be definitely awkward now and I would have to have a serious conversation with Gemma tomorrow" I hiss under my breath, shrugging and even though I said it more to myself than to him, Harry burst out in laughter, throwing his head back to look at the ceiling.

"See? That's what I'm talking about, I really enjoy to be around you" He says, nodding towards me "You're so much more than the dumb hoes I'm used to, and I feel like I would be jeopardizing that by f*****g you." Harry takes the bottle of water from my hands, popping the cap out and taking a big sip from it.

"Sorry, dude, I still don't get it" I shrug, leaning my back against the kitchen counter and looking at Harry with disbelief in my eyes. I think that's the first time the mood is completely ruined and it's not my fault, he should be proud of himself.

"I'm a selfish motherfucker, love" He says matter of factly, pinning his eyes on mine to watch for my reaction "I'm not here to love or get some kind of emotional connection. I'll f**k you good, damn, I'll treat you so bloody right... But in the end, I won't be attached to you."

Ugh, why does he have to complicate things like that? I was happy to just roll with it, wasn't even thinking of getting attached or starting to like him and now he is seriously talking about love?

What is up with the young people these days? I always knew that millennial bullshit was going to ruin an entire generation, so much access to internet and memes f***s up brain cells, I'm telling ya.

"Harry, sweetheart" I finally manage to say "the way you're talking seems like you have a cursed p***s or something like that. It's just s*x, relax."

I don't even know why am I feeling so relaxed about that, it's not like s*x is something I do in a regular basis... it's not just the fact that I don't do it ever since Sam but also, I've never had s*x with someone I wasn't in a relationship with.

It's like something in the way Harry is that makes me act different around him, I get bolder and somewhat carefree. Or maybe I'm just saying that because I'm still horny or it's my stubbornness making me talk s**t just to prove someone is wrong.

Harry is by far the best kiss I'd ever had and that's enough to make me want to f**k him and see if the s*x is so good as it appear to be. He is also funny, sexy, smart and handsome like a f*****g Greek God but I don't see myself falling in love with him - I know I just can't. Harry didn't need to say he is selfish or basically a man w***e, I knew that the moment I put my eyes on him for the first time.

He is just too handsome, too interesting and too much of a free spirit to be someone that gets attached easily. And although I do have a huge crush on him, I believe it to be exclusively physical. I barely know him and he is definitely not my type of man. He is too young, too playful, too f*****g overwhelming for me.

I always liked to keep things simple and Harry smells like trouble from more than a mile away. He would be too much of a headache for me, that's not what I want.

"Bottom line is" I speak up again "I like you, you're fun to talk to and I like spending time with you. This freaking s****l tension between us is not going to just disappear, so my opinion is we should do something about it and just move on with our lives. We could totally be friends after that. No pressure, hon."

Harry keeps his gaze in me for what looks like ages, as if he is considering what I just said. I'm starting to feel a little overwhelmed with everything that just happened, am I sounding too desperate? I makes me f*****g angry at myself for wanting him so badly, I mean, I don't have s*x in like a year or so and now that I had a little taste of how intimate contact feel like I'm suddenly all horny and needy.

I hate to depend on other people, specially on men in general, and s*x is something I'd promise myself I would not depend on and have been doing just great until I met this stupidly sexy boy.

"Alright then" Harry finally says, pulling me from my mind and giving my a sly smile "If you're sure about it..." He takes a step towards me and although my stomach does a backflip I also take a step, mine being back.

"Wait, the moment is ruined" I say "I'm not in the mood right now."

Harry frowns before his grin becomes even larger "Can think of a way or two to put you back in the mood, lo-" A loud ring shuts his up and he fishes his phone from his back pocket "Hold that thought".

I sigh in relief and sit on the edge of the kitchen counter again, watching as Harry talks quietly to the phone "Hey Gem... He what? What the fuc- You're going now? It's like eleven pm do you think you'll manage to get a plane? Ok. f**k, ok I'll be there in twenty, just wait for me alright?"

My heart makes a little flutter when I hear Gemma's name falling from Harry's lips and I raise my eyebrows inquisitively as soon as he hangs up. He is frowning now and his cheeks are becoming very red, very quick and I can tell he is not happy right now.

"That f*****g Adam is ignoring Gemma again, he has been doing that s**t all week, did she told you?" He sighs, leaving the kitchen to take his shoes on the living room.

"No, she was very quiet this week but I suspected something was happening..." I follow Harry there and watch as he sits on the couch, his curly hair falling to his face as he leans down to put his boots on.

"He has been acting weird all week and avoiding talking to her and they had like a huge fight because of that, she made me read all those bloody messages and I swear I almost had an embolism over that. Anyway, he is doing the same s**t again and now she wants me to drive her to the airport, she is going full crazy girlfriend and flying to Canada" Harry rolls his eyes, standing from the couch and walking towards me.

"s**t, I feel for her. Do you need me to tag along? I don't want her to be so upset alone." Not thinking about it, I put my index finger inside of my mouth, nipping at my nail - a nasty habit I have when feeling anxious.

"No... She kind of doesn't know about me being here tonight... Hope you can keep it between us?" Harry asks and although a million questions just overflow my mind, I nod in agreement.

"Great" He gives me a coy smile and takes a step forward, cornering me between his body and my living room wall "I'll make it up to you, I promise" Harry leans over me, his mouth only a few inches from mine "Can I pick you up tomorrow at 8?"

"To where?"

Instead of answering me, Harry just leans over, closing the space between our mouths to give me an open mouthed, lingering kiss on the lips and it's like my skin fires up immediately. Can't understand how powerful is his effect on me.

"It's gonna be a surprise, love. Be ready" Giving me another kiss, he sighs before turning on his heels and opening the front door, leaving my apartment with the same ceremony he entered here earlier. None at all.

What the f**k is he up to now? With that surprise thing? Does he want to take me out? Or he just want to pick up from where we left of? I mean it's fine by me if this is what he wants but why the f**k he didn't just tell me?

I f*****g hate surprises.

Sighing, I decide to go back to my room, making an strategic stop at the kitchen to grab a carton of vanilla ice cream - after all, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend is waiting for me in my room.