opia [h.s au]

Chapter 11

"f**k, no! There's no way I'm buying this, is too damn revealing!" I hiss at Dom and he rolls his eyes at me, pouting a little.

We are at the mall and he is helping me chose some new clothes for whatever Harry is planning for us to do tonight. That's the part I hate the most in surprises: as you don't know what it is, you don't know to dress properly. I hate not being in control of every situation in my life and this f*****g surprise literally kept me awake all night.

"It's good to be revealing sometimes, Billie, and you look f*****g sexy using it, believe me, I'm a guy" Dom insists, giving me another once over just to irritate me, I can tell.

I'm wearing a tight black dress which have so much cleavage it leaves little to nothing to imagination, and I hate it. I hate to wear revealing clothes, to objectify my body, I hate when I'm talking to a guy and he can't look me in the eyes because his gaze is glued to my chest.

The most revealing pieces in my wardrobe consists in tank tops, cropped tops or tight jeans which I usually pair with baggy shirts or plaid t-shirts and my beloved snickers.

"Billie, sweetie, there's something you need to understand now" Dom sighs patiently "After your conversation with Harry last night, it's pretty obvious what you two are going to do today. You're going to f**k until the sunrises and you'll be too f*****g damaged to even sit for a week"

"f**k, Dom! Gross" I squeal, feeling my cheeks turning red at his remark.

Is in occasions like this that I miss having a girl best friend. Man are too damn practical and as much as yesterday I was bold and straightforward with Harry, truth is I'm f*****g nervous for whatever is going to happen tonight and I don't need someone to make me even more anxious about it.

Yeah, I know we will probably going to f**k tonight - after yesterday there's nothing left to talk about. Harry made it clear he just want the physical action with no emotional connection whatsoever and as much as this is going to be a first time for me, I want that too.

I mean, I'm almost thirty it's about the damn time I grow some balls and just have a nice one night stand for a change. Specially when it's a f*****g year since someone besides myself touched my v****a. Really, I'm practically a virgin again.

"I'm changing back to the other dress I liked" I announce, ignoring the eye roll Dom throws me "If I go with this damn thigh thing he won't even need to undress me, everything is on display anyway."

"You know, sometimes that is fun too" Dom winks at me "All you need to do is push your panties aside... Or you know, maybe you can go commando!"

"Ugh, remind me again why I brought you here?" I turn my head up to the ceiling, ruffing dramatically "You're f*****g gross, Dom, such a pervert."

"If I remember it right, you begged me to be here with you today" Dom frowns and I can see he is biting down a goddamn smirk "And you're one to talk about being a pervert, you're the one that is f*****g buying clothes for your one night stand tonight."

"I hate you" I hiss, turning on my heels to go back to the dressing room and change back to my clothes - I'll just buy the dress I liked, f**k that trying to look sexy thing.

"You can't live without me, hon" Dom slaps my butt when I pass through him stepping hard and I flip him off before entering the dressing room.

~*~

"So, what do you think?" We are at the parking lot, drinking Starbucks cold brew while searching for Dom's old car... or, like he like to address, his vintage car.

Dom watches me with knitted eyebrows. I catwalk towards him, making a little loop when I get close enough.

"Tell me again why you wanted to leave the mall already wearing those clothes?"

"So they can feel more comfortable later... I'm softening the fabric." I shrug.

"You're crazy" Dom rolls his eyes.

"Tell me what you think! Am I pretty?" I say in a high pitched voice, pouting.

"Well, you're gorgeous, baby so everything looks good on you" Dom smiles sweetly "but look like you're ready to sleep, not ready to fuck."

"Oh shut up" I slap his arm, rolling my eyes "I loved this dress and it suits well with my favorite sweater, it's perfect."

Dom chuckles, shaking his head in disbelief. "If you say so... at least you're bought a nice lacy underwear to use under it?" He raises his eyebrows and I feel my cheeks burning hot, probably redder than the shirt Doms using.

"What? Not gonna tell you that!" I squeal, shoving Doms shoulder.

While Dom was looking for yet another leather jacket for him, I did bought a very revealing pair of black lacy underwear, with intricate patterns of lace and a few details in silky turquoise. It matches perfectly with my nails and it's beautiful, the dark color contrasting with my pale skin flawlessly. I'm still debating the possibility of using black nylon stockings, the dress is sufficiently long to cover the hem but I don't want to look like I am trying too hard.

Don't even know where the f**k Harry is taking me tonight, so I don't feel like using clothes that are too fancy or too sexy or whatever.

Ugh that's why I hate this surprise thing so much. I don't f*****g know what to expect and although it may feel exciting for other people to me it's a freaking nightmare.

"It's funny that you were all bold and unashamed with Harry last night but you still squirm under the mention of lacy panties" Dom chuckles, shaking his head "What happens with you when you're with that guy? You turn to another person."

"I don't!" I squeal "it's just... I don't know, he seems to awaken something in me... don't know if it's the fact that he is younger than me, or that his kiss scramble with my mind and makes my brain turn into mush. Don't know, he just seems to reach a side of me that don't usually is out."

"Hmmm" Dom hums, a coy smile creeping in his face "tonight he probably will reach a part of you that has been untouched for way too f*****g long." He winks and I gag with my drink, spilling coffee in my hand.

"f**k you, you pervert!" I squeal, punching him in the chest but Dom barely blinks, chuckling at my reaction. Damn workouts, he probably didn't even felt my punch.

Dom chuckles, shoving my arm away gently. "Seems like our Harry guy really does something to you... it's chemistry, baby. You just lived under a rock for too long but the connection you two seem to have it's not that common. You should be happy about it."

"Well it's not like this could be anything more than just s*x. I told you, Harry was all uh I'm not the boyfriend type, uh I'm going to get attached to you uh I'm such a fuckboy" I do a horrible mimic of Harry's British accent and Dom laughs out loud, throwing his head back and placing one of his large hands over his chest.

I giggle along, tying up my hair in a quick bun and taking a sip of my cold brew latte, the bitter coffee flavor spreading over my tongue and we finally reach for his 69 Camaro.

"Oh darling" Dom chuckles, fishing the keys from his front pocket "The ones who say that are the first to go down. Mark my words, he will be all in love in no time."

~*~

Dom left me in my apartment three hours ago, making me swear I would tell him everything about my night with Harry tomorrow.

At the beginning of our friendship, I remember feeling a little awkward to share such personal things with a guy, specially s*x stuff. I'm not a shy person and frankly my s****l life is not that exciting but I usually felt more comfortable sharing my experiences, fears and odd stuff with Annabelle. I don't know, it felt safer to talk about s*x with a woman.

Of course that backfired later, guess I shared way so many details about Sam with Annabelle she felt the need to try and prove it herself.

The way she betrayed me was so low, so filthy, I promised myself I would never open myself to a friend like I used to. Annabelle knew everything about Sam and I, she was aware of all my fears, all my insecurities. I used to tell her everything - our ups and downs, our rare fights and even how boring our routine could be sometimes. And she was always so sweet giving me advice and taking care of me.

Little did I know she was f*****g Sam on the side. And even worse, when Sam finally decided to man up and tell me, guess it would be expected for her to look me in the eyes and give me some sort of explanation, to at least try to show me her side of the story, but she didn't. She left all the responsibility to Sam and simply stop answering my calls. She shut me down completely, ending twelve years of friendship without even saying she was sorry.

I'm glad I have Dom, though. He not only was essential in me getting over the double betrayal, but he managed to gain my trust and now as strange as this may sound, I love him like an older brother. However, although I like to share things with him, that's just so much I want to talk about s*x with him.

It's awkward.

Looking at my reflection in the mirror, I give myself a slow once over for the millionth time tonight. I had considered the nylon stockings earlier, but when I put them on I just feel too damn nasty. I'm not a prude but I've never used something like that before and guess I'm just not so confident about my body to start wearing it now, specially with a guy I'm not in a relationship with.

Instead, I opted for the new dress I bought today, pairing it with my favorite grey knitted sweater and shiny black combat boots. I even tried to put on some heels but ended up looking like a baby giraffe taking its first steps, that s**t is just not for me. I did a light makeup, just a little concealer, mascara, highlight and red lipstick and decided it's enough. I'm not one to wear heavy makeup often and tonight shouldn't be any different.

Yeah I know, never wear red lipstick to a date, if we kiss it will be all messy and stuff, but I don't f*****g care. I mean, for all I know that's not even a date. Still can't figure out what the f**k this is anyway.

My heart skips a beat when I hear the intercom and my eyes dart straight to the clock. f**k, it's 7:55 pm, he is here. I buzz him in, running to my bathroom and applying a little cologne, which I regret immediately when the sweet-ish scent quickly takes over the tiny apartment, making it very obvious I just put it on.

Well, screw it, there's nothing I can do about it now.

Shifting in my feet, I look to my front door so nervous I actually think I may faint anytime now. Since when do I get this nervous about a guy, for f***s sake? I mean, it's just Harry. The amazingly handsome and unbelievably hot Gemma's younger brother. I should not be feeling so f*****g nervous about meeting a guy I already know, who it's younger than me. He is just boy.

A boy you're crazy to f**k - my subconscious reminds me but I shut her down with a mental eye roll.

Maybe it's because I know what will happen tonight, or because I know he knows what will happen. I don't f*****g know, this is my first date with such dirty intentions and I'm kinda lost in how to act or feel.

Maybe this is just too much for me? Yesterday I thought I was ready for this, damn, thought I knew exactly what I wanted and although I do want to get some action, but now that it's actually happening I feel kinda threatened, uncomfortable, not at all ready for this.

Maybe I should just call it off? I could pretend I'm have a headache. Sorry, Harry, can't do it tonight, I'm not feeling well.

Oh! Even better - I can say I'm on my period! He would definitely run to the another direction, the way the American educational system is he probably will think I'm leaking blood until I die or something like... f**k. He is British, not American. He probably had decent education and he have a sister, period must not be scary for him as it was to Sam.

Great, Billie, now you're thinking about your ex. Way to go.

The light knock in my door pulls me out of my mind and taking a deep breath, I walk towards it, mentally counting to ten. It's too late to back out now, I'll just have to go with it and whatever happens, happens.

"Hyaa!" I practically scream when I open the door, my voice high pitched with nervousness and Harry frowns a little, taken aback by my warm greeting.

"Hello, you" Harry's lips pouts a little when he says you and I feel my cheeks blushing instantly. How the f**k this motherfucker manages to knock all the air of my lungs every time I put my eyes on him?

He looks unbelievably handsome, wearing a light blue shirt that is barely buttoned down, a black suit over it and his signature black tight jeans, black boots covering his feet. It's a basic outfit, it doesn't have any kind of exaggerated flourishes, no bright color, nothing out of the ordinary and yet he looks like he just stepped out of the catwalk.

Everything he wears always seem to fit him perfectly, his tall and lean body making him look elegant even if he was wearing just a tank top and shorts. Something in the way Harry stands proudly and confident, always seeming to be so freaking comfortable inside his own skin makes him look sexy as f**k.

"So you're ready?" He asks, raising his eyebrows and I realize I've been staring at him, again.

Always so subtle, Billie. Keep going.

"You look beautiful" Harry winks, giving me a slow once over and biting down his bottom lip "Loved the dress" he compliments and I feel my face hot.

Billie, you're not shy, control yourself woman!

"Thanks, you too" I give him a coy smile, turning on my heels "I'll just grab my bag".

Damn it why my voice is sounding so high pitched?

Harry waits for me at the door and then holds the elevator for us. We stay in silence inside it, me trying not to look towards him and he making no ceremony whatsoever while looking at me intently and I feel like he is already undressing me with his eyes. s**t, I know yesterday I was practically asking him to f**k me but now I don't know if I can go through with this.

I know that if I show Harry my insecurity he is going to think I'm afraid of falling in love with him, the cheeky bastard. But it's not like that - after Sam I don't think it would be so easy for me to love again, actually I don't even want to fall in love again, I'm doing great being alone, thank you very much.

I'm not nervous about what I might end up feeling for him. It's just that, f**k, he is the younger brother of a person who matters a lot for me, and that's the first time I hang out with a guy who made his intentions so crystal clear right in the beginning - to which I not only obliged but also agreed - and I think it's a little awkward, like, what are we going to do anyway? Just go to a hotel and get it done so we can get over it?

Fuck what's the damn protocol for situations like that?

With the amount of sitcoms I usually watch one would think I should know how to act, I mean I was obsessed with s*x and the City for way longer that I like to admit. But real life is different, it's scary and nerve-wrecking.

We reach the first floor of my building and as we step out of the elevator, Harry rests his large hand on the small of my back. His touch is warm, comfy and kind of reassuring and it seems to melt a little of my nervousness, to which I'm grateful. He guides me to what I recognize as Gemma's car and when we approach it, he opens the passenger door for me.

"Such a gentleman" I mock, giggling as I get comfortable on the same front seat I've been so many times before with Gemma.

Harry gives me a sly smile, closing the door and going around the car to sit on the driver's seat with grace. His movements kinda remind me of a feline - elegant, firm and somehow wild, with a sense of freedom and self-assurance I can only hope I had.

"So where are we going?" I ask, trying to break the silence and also looking forward to know what awaits me this night.

"To a restaurant, have dinner" He answer simply and I can't hide my surprise.

"Dinner? Again?"

"You know, usually people have dinner every night" He gives me a smug look "It's kind of a regular thing to do and also necessary for keeping alive and stuff."

"Ha-ha" Rolling my eyes, I try with all my self-control not to laugh at his smart-ass remark "I just mean... I mean..." I stutter. What am I trying to say here, that I was expecting him to take me home and f**k me already? "Well, didn't thought you were taking me to dinner again!" I blurt out quickly.

Harry hums, giving me the side eye while driving through the busy streets of Manhattan. "You thought I would just take you home and try to f**k you?" He goes straight to the point, as per usual "Oh, Billie, you said it yourself - I am a gentleman. And I do enjoy your company, there's no need to be eager."

"That's so not what I meant!" I squeal, covering my redden cheeks with my hands "I just... I just thought... Oh f**k you Harry" I mumble, crossing my arms in front of my chest and pouting while I hear his giggle.

Even though he is still looking at the streets in front of us, I can see the smug on his face and that damn smirk cracking up his lips. I've been with him for less than ten minutes and he's already making me feel like a high school girl.

This is going to be a long night.