Unrequited

The most terrible loneliness is in loving someone completely, deeply, and without reserve; and knowing that you are not loved that way in return. Dan Singer is an i***t. Or at least that’s what his older brother Mark tells me. I can’t say i agree with him though, after all, I am madly in love with him. You see, as soon as I met the boys on a hunt, I knew I was done for. Tall, muscular, strong yet sensitive, deep hazel eyes with luxurious should length brown hair, and so deliciously good looking. His dimples alone made me swoon. What’s not to love, right? Both boys were handsome, but there was something about Dan, something that I found captivating. I was lying on my stomach on one of the beds in the motel we were currently holed up in, my elbows propping me up as I looked at the laptop in front of me, trying to research whatever monster of the week we were dealing with. It wasn’t going very well. I kept re-reading the same sentence, my eyes getting blurry from looking at the bright screen. I felt a light slap on my ass and I turned to see Mark standing next to the bed grinning. “Bunk over, short stuff.” Mark was a little shorter than his brother, but just as muscular; his short hair styled messily and his emerald green eyes sparkling with mischief. I rolled over onto my back so that he could lie next to me, closing my laptop and setting it onto the floor before cuddling up to my best friend. He opened his arms willingly and I rested my head against his chest, my own arms wrapping around his waist. “Enough with the research. I can’t concentrate and my eyes are sore. I need sleep,” I complained, my eyes already starting to droop. Dan sighed from across the room, closing his own laptop and raising his eyebrows as he looked over to us on the bed, a slight smirk on his face. I always shared a bed with Mark when we were hunting. It was hard enough getting through the day around Dan, sharing a bed with him would be too much. I’d probably spontaneously combust. “You two comfortable over there?” He asked, amused at the flirting between us. Mark flashes him a s**t-eating grin. “You’re missing out Danny. She spoons like a pro.” I slapped his chest lightly. “Hey! You’re making me sound like a spooning w***e!” Giggling, I looked over at Dan and wiggled my eyebrows up and down. “Anytime for you though, Dan.” He leaned back on his chair, crossing his arms over his chest as he let out a loud laugh. “Yeah, I’ll pass, thanks.” My smile faltered, embarrassed by my weak attempt at flirting and my grip tightened around Mark’s waist. He glanced down at me before looking back at Dan, who had already looked away and was stood, about to go to the bathroom. “Huh, your loss.” As soon as the bathroom door closed, I let out a small sigh. It got harder every time I tried and by now, I should know better. “Hey, hey,” Mark said softly, cupping my chin and moving my head up so that he could look at me. “Listen to me. He’s an i***t, can’t see what’s staring him right in the face. He’d be lucky to have you. Hell, any man would be lucky to have you, including myself. Maybe if you told him how you feel…” I shook my head and looked up into his Green eyes. “It’s ok, he doesn’t see me as anything other than a friend. You and I both know that, you don’t have to lie to me.” He leaned down and kissed the top of my head. “I’m not lying sweetheart.” Scooting down into the bed, he pulled me with him and covered us with the scratchy motel blankets. “Get some sleep. We’ve got a long day ahead of us tomorrow.” I kissed his cheek before resting my head on his chest. “Love you too Mark.” Letting out a long sigh, I let my body relax and closed my eyes, the sound of Mark’s heartbeat lulling me to sleep. Meeting the Singer’s had come at a pivotal point in my life. My family had been dead for a few years and I was hunting solo; angry and needing retribution on every single evil thing I could get my hands on. I hadn’t grieved the death of my family properly, and I was on a dangerous path, not really caring if I got hurt or even killed. I was acting reckless because of how I felt, because of my grief. It was during a hunt when I met them. I had been tracking a vampire who had slaughtered a family, including their two small children, to his nest when they saved my life. Turns out the best was bigger than I had originally thought and I’d been overpowered fairly quickly, tied up and ready to be used as a human drinking fountain. Then, I’m being saved by these two male model sons of bitches, watching in awe as they took down every one of those camps before untying me. They’d been stuck with me ever since. Mark grew to be my best friend. We had just clicked instantly, bouncing off each other, joking around and harmlessly flirting. I found I could confide in him, knowing that he wouldn’t judge me. I loved him dearly. He helped me grieve the only way I knew how; through violence. He understood my need for retribution but also kept me from going too far, from losing myself to the vengeance I craved. Dan had helped me understand my emotions and why I felt such a strong need for revenge. He helped me work through what I felt, to not bottle up my anger and letting it fester, which I suppose contributed towards my feelings for him. Both boys helped me push through those feelings and the desperate hunger I had for revenge. Mark had figured out my crush pretty quickly; never go drinking with a Singer. They will drink you under the table and, for me at least, alcohol equals very loose lips. I didn’t quite know what it was about Dan that made me fall for him. At first we were just friends, not as close as I was with his brother but friends all the same. We’d all go on hunts together and we’d joke around, nothing more. But then every time I saw him, I grew more attracted to him; I was intrigued by him. Every time he walked into the room with his brother, my stomach would flip and I couldn’t help but gawk. And then I was falling, my love for Dan growing until my heart literally aches for him. In a way, I think, knowing that I couldn’t have him made me want him even more. Mark encouraged me to talk to him, to tell him how I felt but I always refused. Dan didn’t see me like that, he’d never showed those kind of actions or feelings towards me. To him we were just friends so I knew that he would never feel the same way I did for him and there was no way I was going to embarrass myself by telling him. I feared the rejection I knew I’d receive, so I kept it hidden, pushing my love for him deep down inside, trying to carry on with my life the best I could, knowing that we were just friends.