In Love With My Boss

Eighteen

One week later:

Things are going better than I expected. After the effects of the ''best s*x of is life'' disappeared, Beli-ass got back to his usual tone and behavior, not the bad one, but the nice friendly one. He isn't as happy and as chatty as he was the day after we did it, but he is okay. We fell into a routine again and I am glad that things got back to normal between us, mostly for me in fact because for him things have always been normal, but you get what I mean. I also stopped defying him. For goods. No more teasing, no more games. I don't want to give him the occasion to, as he said that night, ''be amused'' by my little pranks anymore. I have made my mind. I am here to do my job, and that is it. Nothing more. I am here to earn money, not to get involved in a doomed relationship with my boss.

But there is a constant reminder present into that office, of course, besides Dimitri, that keeps on making me relive that night over and over again and makes me want to lash at him and tell him that it was me, but I am managing to hold back as best as I can. I haven't slipped a single word yet and I am quite proud of myself. But this secret is way harder to keep than I expected. The thing is that every time I hand him a folder or the other way around, I hear the clink of my golden necklace on his expensive hand watch. But I can't seem to understand the reason he is carrying it around. Is it to remind him of the new conquest he has made? To boost up his arrogance even more? Is he annoyed by the fact that he wasn't able to find the mysterious girl or to even remember her? Maybe. He is so used to have everything he wants and for things to only go his way. Well, this time he won't put his hands ever again on the precious thing that he desires. In a month he'll find another woman and will probably throw the necklace away. It's the way thing work with him.

And I feel sorry for losing it. Guilty to be more specific. It is the only thing I have left from my grandmother. She first gave it to my mother, and when I turned eighteen, she passed it on to me. It was our family's descent and I lost it into the bed of a man I helplessly began to fall in love with but I know close to nothing about while being wasted. Good job, Rose. It's quite a situation you have gotten yourself into.

I just started my day and I already have nothing to do. I simply wait to be called or be needed somewhere. Hell, I am so bored that I might just go to Tiffany's and buy Tasha another jewelry or something. I totally hate sitting on my ass and do nothing all day long. I hate days like this. And the fact that I get bored fast is so not helping me right now. I feel like running around the office just to get the sense that I am doing something.

Around 10:20, the witch enters the scenery. She hasn't done a lot of visiting these days, and this is the first time she comes around since the birthday party thing. So, maybe Dimitri was telling the truth about them not getting along that good lately. But why do I even care about that? I shouldn't.

She is dressed fully in black, and is wearing an expensive fur coat to keep her warm. Her high heels echo on the floor and I just can't wait to see what she is going to tell me now. Is she going to tell me that I need to see a stylist? Is she going to point out the dark circles around my eyes? Who knows? It is always something new that she finds to make me feel bad about, every time she comes around. But today, by some holy miracle, she just enters Dimitri's office without throwing a word in my direction. It's just her glare that transmits me that she might get to ''deal with me'' later and that she hates me even more than the last time we saw each other. And what can I say? The feeling is very mutual.

Then, she starts to speak into that girly voice again. But only this time she seems pissed.

'Hi, Mister Belikov! Can you tell me what these are?'

I can't take this anymore. Her voice is too annoying for me to hear now. I have got enough of it. I simply get up and head to the little cafeteria from the first floor, to keep company to some other tortured souls from this building. It's my lunch break anyway. I get there and the room is full of quacking women. It's still better than hearing Tasha's false sweet voice.

DPOV begins

Tasha gets into my office practically slamming the door behind her and gets straight to the subject. I am surprised to see her around in fact.

'Hi, Mister Belikov!' she says, obviously pissed off about something. I wonder what it is this time. 'Can you tell me what these are?' she asks, revealing a small material from her purse.

I have forgotten about those; I just put them into a drawer and let them there. But how the hell did she even find that? Did she snoop around my apartment? God, I need to find a way to take my keys back from her. If I think about it, I should have done that a while ago but I guess it slipped my mind. I don't know why I gave her one of my spare keys in the first place. Oh, yeah, I remember: because she kept on asking for them for them for a month straight and I couldn't take it anymore, that's why. She can be annoyingly convincing at times.

But what did she do there anyway? The most officially, we haven't been together ever since that night into my office when we met Rose and her friend, when I was so close to doing the stupidest thing in my entire life. What right does she think she has to go to my apartment?

'I don't know. Aren't these your underpants?' I lie her on an instant. I guess that I am really used to doing that. But I have no idea what else to tell her. I guess that in fact, I don't owe her any explanation, but it's too late already to change my answer.

'No, they are not. I am not amnesic, Dimitri. And you know I hate red.' no, I don't know in fact. I don't really know much about you. And that is not in fact red. It's burgundy, and it's Rose's favorite color. She let it slip one day.

'Are you sure you didn't leave them at my place some time ago and simply forgot about them?'

'Tell me whose these are right now.'

'I don't know.' and this is the first time I say this and it is actually the truth. Who would have thought?

'Of course you don't know. You promised me that this won't happen again.'

'Look, Tasha, even if I would know, this is none of your business.'

'What do you mean?'

'You know what I mean. We are only friends now. So things like these shouldn't interest you.'

'Oh, come on Dimitri. I know how you work.'

'Okay. I'm sorry, this is my fault.' she looks at me shocked. And she has a reason to be. I didn't usually apologize to her. 'Maybe I didn't-' make myself clear enough I want to say, but she doesn't let me finish.

'No, this is not your fault. It's the fault of the b***h who owns these. Tell me and I will take care of it.' and the bad thing is that she really believes that I am still going to go back to her. 'I know that she lured you somehow. Tell me who she is.'

'Tasha, stop this. You need to get it in your head that you and I won't ev-'

'Fine. I can find her on my own if you don't want to tell me.' she says and heads toward the door. I call after her but she doesn't come back.

This thing has gotten way too far. I can't keep on doing this back and forth thing with her. Can't she understand that between us things are over? Do I need to be more explicit than this? Plus, it wouldn't be fair for me to still be with her even if there wouldn't always be Rose on my mind. I haven't had feelings for her for a long time now and I don't understand why I kept on avoiding ending things with her. But now I know what I have to do. She will come back when she won't find what she is looking for and then, I will ''set her free''. And this time, I will make sure she understands this for goods. This is the right thing to do. She needs to go on and live her life peacefully, without me. She is better off.

DPOV ends

I hang around the cafeteria for a while, getting up to date with the latest gossip around the building. I don't usually speak, because I don't really like to intrude into someone else's life and then speak around about it. And anyway, I don't have much to say about my boss. I barely know him. But instead, I'm pretty good at listening. And the things these women have to say are so damn interesting. There is always some drama going on around this building.

The lunch break is about halfway gone when Tasha enters the room, with her face flushed.

'Nobody leaves this room until someone tells me whose these are!' she yells at us, like we owe her something.

Like really, who she thinks she is? If Dimitri wouldn't have been the owner of this company and she his girlfriend, she wouldn't have the courage to act this way with us. I mean, we outnumber her big time. It would be an interesting catfight to watch between us. And I will surely bring my contribution to it. I have wanted for so long to rip that hair out of her head.

She raises her hand and holds a pair of underpants. Well, damn me, but I know that pair, because it belongs to me. At least it did a week ago. Did Dimitri pass his trophy to his girlfriend so that she could hunt down his new conquest because he wasn't capable of doing so? Wow, I am surprised. Or did she find them? Well, anyway, it seems that Belikov isn't very good at hiding things. Or he doesn't want to. From what I have seen, he likes to brag.

Nobody responds to her. But what can anybody else say to her besides me?

'I am still waiting! One of you little horny bitches went and twisted my man's minds! Again. I thought you understood my message the last time, but it seems that you didn't. I want to know who, and I want to know it now!'

Twisted her man's minds? Her man? I believe that that is the last thing he is for her. But what do I really know? What did he say some time ago? The power of habit, no? If she would only know how much she matters to him.

She passes the dark red material in front of every one of us.

'No one? What about you? You are the new one. The fresh meat around the building.'

Oh, she is speaking with me. Of course I am her first target, why am I so surprised? Not that she is wrong this time though. I know I am guilty. But to hell if I would ever admit it out loud. No one will know about that thing. I will take it with me to the grave.

'Oh, but you can't afford these, honey. My bad. I should pick on a real woman around here, not on a little stupid girl. Or did he buy you these to convince you to get into his bed?'

That is it. I can't take it anymore. And she called me a little girl. Again. Something inside me snaps.

'Listen here, you b***h! I am so f*****g done with you treating me like this! I have put up with your s**t for too long, just because you are f*****g my boss and I just wanted to keep my damn job! But I will not tolerate for you to come and insult me like this anymore!'

'You can't-'

'Sush! Now I am speaking and you will f*****g listen to me. I don't need a man to buy me f*****g lingerie! I am totally capable of providing for myself, not like you who just live from getting expensive gifts from everyone, okay? And if you think that I let myself bought with a pair of fancy panties, then you are wrong!'

Images of Dimitri rubbing his fingers on the soft material between my legs pop into my head and this only makes me angrier. Angry on myself. I am aware that I am a total hypocrite right now. I am the one who slept with her man and instead of being ashamed of what I did and shrink under her gaze I go out and yell at her. But she is right in front of me and she pushed my buttons for too long, so I am taking it all out on her.

'Maybe that is how things work in your world, but they sure as hell don't function the same way in mine. You said that Belikov is your man? Fine, so be it as you think in your delirious mind. Then why aren't you a real woman and do something to keep his d**k into his pants, huh!? But sincerely speaking, it would be a surprise if he wouldn't go after other women while being with a woman like you.'

With fire in her eyes she leans over and whispers to me, but it's pointless because all the girls around are not even breathing, just to hear what she has to say to me. 'I know you are the reason he left me. He just decided he doesn't want us to be together at not even a week after he met you. I don't know what you did to him, but I tell you, it won't last. He is mine. He always has been and he will always be.' Some relief washes over me. At least they weren't together when we had s*x, so I am not such a bad person after all. But still. Why was she coming around then?

'Yeah, of course, blame it all on me for you not being able to keep him in one place!'

Some girls around gasp at my words. At this, Tasha raises her hand to slap me, but I catch her arm and push it to one side, shaking her. She should be grateful that I stopped at this. I am capable of so much more right now.

'And it doesn't matter whose panties those are, not this time, not ever, because things are always going to be like this! He has a reputation around here and I am sure that you know that. You should be stupid not to notice it! And everybody fears you, just because you think you own the place and you think you can fire everyone you want! Well, let me tell you that this won't work for too long, okay? But the thing I really don't understand is why you let him treat you like this. Can't you just go find- '

DPOV begins

As Tasha wasn't coming back, I got out of the office to go look for her. I head to the only place I know I can find her, the cafeteria. She must be picking on the women in there, I am sure, and I know I need to stop her before things turn bad. But it seems that I waited for too long because there, I hear Rose yelling at someone. I open the door and the one she is screaming at is Tasha. I enter just as Tasha wants to slap Rose, but she is stopped. This thing going on right now surely isn't good.

Neither of them notices my presence and I hear the last thing Rose is saying to her. And she is right about me. But she is picking on Tasha when it is, in fact, my fault. I am the one responsible for what is happening here. I can't let Tasha get the worst of it. She has just picked on Rose, making an erroneous assumption. And Rose needs to stop. I don't really know what is the reason they are yelling at each other, but I am the one they should pick on. I am the one who did all this mess and I need to repair it somehow.

DPOV ends

'Rose.' a strong accented voice makes me shut my mouth. I am anyway breathing heavily from all the yelling and I need a pause.

I turn my head and see him standing in the door frame, looking back at me and anger washes over me some more.

'Oh, just perfect, he has come to the rescue of his' I raise my hand and wiggle it in Tasha's direction 'something. Whatever you are to him. You know what? I don't f*****g care! Fire me if you want Belikov, but I will not tolerate for this woman to insult me one more time. I have put up with her verbal assault for too long now.'

I make some steps heading towards the door. There is him, of course, and he is blocking my way. And as his eyes land on me again, his expression softens. Oh, I so don't need him to feel sorry for me. 'Rose, what happened?'

'Ask her!' I point towards Tasha. 'I don't have the patience to explain myself. I am getting out of here. Now please get out of my way.' I finish as I make my way out of the room, getting past him.

I don't care anymore. I have bottled up too many things inside since I work here and I just couldn't keep them inside for longer. I get to my office and let all of my tears fall. I am so mad and I can't help it. I need to let all this anger out somehow. It was either that or smashing everything around me.

DPOV begins

After Rose leaves, the room remains silent.

'Get back to work.' I tell to the other women as I take Tasha by her hand and take her out.

We get outside the building, so that I can talk with her without anyone eavesdropping. But I don't get the chance to speak first.

'Did you hear what she said about me? About you? She just insulted you, Dimitri. You need to fire that shameless b***h right now!'

'She is right.'

Her expression fills with bewilderment. 'What? Are you out of your mind? You are nothing like that.'

God, this woman has a too high opinion of me. 'Yes, I am. And maybe a lot worse. Look, Tasha. I haven't been the nicest man with you. I have done all these things to you and I don't understand why you choose not to leave me a long time ago.'

'But you-'

'Let me finish, please. I am sorry. But you deserve someone better. I am not the one for you.'

'What does this even mean?'

'It means that you are free to have a better life without me.'

'Are you breaking up with me?'

'We already did this a while ago Tasha.'

'But I thought that we would just take a break.'

'From what I remember, that is not what I said, didn't' I?'

'You can't be serious Dimitri.'

'I am very serious. Come on, Tasha. I think that we weren't together for a long time now, and you know this. Things between us weren't working for a while now. I am just setting you free for goods. You deserve someone better.'

'You are insane. I am going now and I'll let you put your thoughts in order.'

'My thoughts are in order Tasha. And between us, things are over. I would like for you to give me back my keys now.'

She seems very surprised by my request but doesn't protest. With a displeased expression on her face, she gets the keys out of her purse and gives them to me.

'Okay, I'll do whatever you want, because I don't want us to argue some more now. I don't feel like it after what that b***h did earlier.'

'I would very much you not to call Rose like that anymore. She is not responsible for anything that happened between the two of us and you know it.'

Her bewilderment only increases. 'I can't seem to make any sense of you today Dimitri. I don't know what happened to you, but this man in front of me is not you. Call me when you are thinking straight again, okay?' she says and turns away.

'For the love of God, Tasha, why won't you understand? I am not going to do it.'

'Of course you will. You always do.' She says smiling all-knowing.

'Yeah, I used to. But not this time.'

'Sure honey.' She says patting my cheek. 'Oh, and fire that woman.' She says lastly.

But I won't do a thing she told me. I have ended this chapter quite some time ago. And she will understand this thing too sooner or later, either she wants it or not.

DPOV ends

After a while, he enters my little room. I rise rapidly and wipe out my tears. God, I loathe crying in public. And I especially loathe him seeing me like this.

'I'll...I'll gather my things and I will leave until the end of the day, Sir. I am sorry for putting you into a situation like that.' maybe I shouldn't have said all those things in front of so many people after all.

I begin to grab all my papers and stuff from my desk and in my hurry, some of them end up on the floor. I want to bend down and pick them up, but I don't get to.

'Rose.' He puts one hand over mine. I stop and look at him. 'You don't have to leave.'

'I'm sorry, but what?'

'You just simply stated a truth. An ugly truth, but still. You are right.' he said passing a hand through his hair, looking somehow guilty. 'And Tasha won't bother you anymore. She won't be coming around here any time soon.'

I just simply stare as he gets into his office.

What did just happen?

Did he just tell me that I was right? Well, I was right, no? And did he just say that he broke up with that woman, or am I interpreting this wrong? Wow, things are getting really weird around here.