Torn between the Devil and Angel.

The past came lurking

I had to pick my phone at some point but if I could stall it for two more seconds, I certainly will be doing that but then I guess curiosity got the best part of me and I picked up my phone and I found myself imputing my fingerprint and going straight to Grima, I had two unread messages from him, I opened it and he sent a laughing emoji, "some much for being shy"that was the content of the second message

I had earlier told him, I was shy.It was really surprising he remembered, I went on to say sorry for embarrassing myself in your dm, he said,"come on, the video was nice" just as his message came in. I had a notification from Jiga,I checked it and it was Frida and the message was pretty much clear because it was .boldly written in caps lock

"DON'T SEND THE VIDEO", I asked her why, she said my tee was too short and he will probably see me as a loose girl,I told her I had sent it already.she tried to soothe me and tell me , it wasn't so much of a big deal but I kept obsessing over the issue, I was so sad that I cried myself to sleep.

I woke up pretty much early,I checked my time and it was just 3am in the morning.After laying in bed bored and tired of surfing the internet,I decided to play dress up and document it.In as much as I don't believe that dressing up in school makes one fail.I didn't want to bother about what to wear but I wanted to slay regardless.

The break was almost over, as per usual I had mixed feelings about resumption,it's pretty much annoying that we dont school together and have to wait for the holidays to see each other. I had a lot of fits planned out.

For everytime,Jade came over , there was always a fit ,I needed her opinion on and she made sure I wore it.I am so much nicer and I don't make her wear except I'm trying to prove to her, that wearing the clothes are stressful, that's basically what I used my break to do.My aesthetics changed and I had to adjust my wardrobe,it wasn't a 360 degrees kinda change,i just dropped some clothes and got new ones .I love love the thrill that comes with owning new things.Clothes, shoes, bags are my favorite new things to own.

I was particularly excited about the new loafers I got and the new bags.My dad bought me a prada bag and it was so pretty,I went from not owning a black bag to owning a really pretty one, I also a bought a black shoulder

I took off my two months braids, I was moving back to school the next day and I needed to make a new hair I booked an appointment for the next day which was Sunday,I have an issue with taking off my braids because my hair is 4c type and the shrinking was on another whole different level because the weather was cold.

The next day came quickly than I will have liked, I haven't put in order the stuff I was taking to school and I had to really leave home early because of church. I didn't bother trying to look good that day, I was grumpy and tired.

I slept way too late the previous day watching my favorite series of all time, The Charlie's , I fell in love with this series, because the main characters passion didn't look scripted or fake, asides that the guy was really attractive.

I wore a navy blue wrap top and mustard yellow skirt,I wore a scandals because I wasn't in the mood for heels or boots,I had an option between wearing my braided wig or the curly wig, I choosed the braided wig, I had to leave church really early.

I got to the salon in time and met her installing the same locs for someone else, I wanted to do. It came out really nice and I was confident about doing the hair, I'm usually skeptical about making my hair and today certainly wasn't an option.

I was famished, giving the fate I left the house without eating anything, I asked the salonist for where I could to something to eat, she told me there was a pastry store just across the street.Her serviceperson offered to help me get it and I was elated. I said my gratitudes and handed her cash, I told her to get me two muffins and a soda.

She came back after awhile and handed me my muffins and soda, I pounced on it like I haven't eaten in a year, it tasted really nice but perchance, I thought so because I was hungry.

She was finally done with her client's hair and wanted to start my hair, I needed to wash my hair , she suggested a new shampoo for me and I got it,I like my scalp to be scratched and she understood the assignment.

We started my hair and I kept watching videos on Grima,I don't have a painful scalp but, this one really hurt, I kept shouting at intervals.It might not have being painful as I was making out to be.

There is a way the mind operates,that's really funny Jade had told me earlier, that the hair was really painful, so naturally, my mind tells me it is.After she was done installing the locs, she laid my edges and asked me If she could take pictures of the hair, I was down for it because I know how reviews works when it comes to small businesses.

I finished my hair really late and I had to make a stop at the mall, I needed groceries, I had gotten groceries earlier that week, but I still forget a few,I don't know how it was possible to forget cereals but I did, the mall was not too far from the salon, but I still needed to use a lotta.I could actually get it from the mall at college but it was way more expensive and they had really fewer options.cereals like frosted flaxes were always out of stock, the only available cereal in the mall at cheerios,I had eaten a lot of cheerios and I was honestly fed up of, they tasted.

I picked a few other things from the mall, chocolate bars, milk, paper towels, flip flops.It was getting dark and I knew there was no way, my mom was going to drive me all the way to college that night but I was going to try at least.

There was traffic on my way back home, which wasted more time, I was so unsettled in the lotta,I kept hissing and shifting from side to side.Frida and I have agreed we were coming into college that day, I honestly know how change of plans works, so I was praying my mom will actually do my bidding but chances were really unlikely.

I got off the lotta and proceeded to opening the gate with my key, when Frida call came in, I was hesitant to pick the call as I didn't know the verdict. I had to answer her at some point and I decided the best time was now, the fact she was calling, meant she was in College already.I braced myself for what was coming.

Frida and I don't address each other with our names, she calls me "Baby"and I call her "Baby", we are so unapologetically about the name, that we say it literally everywhere.In the course of last semester, Frida saw me and shouted baby as per usual now, you could literally see people's head turning to see the "Baby", it was then it dawned on us how weird it might have looked, but has that in anyway stopped us?? Certainly not.

Hello Baby, how are you? I noticed the tone of her voice, she sounded way too distraught and tired unlike her normal bubbly self, I asked what was wrong without answering her question, she told me she was in a hostel and she wasn't going to be able to make it to college today,apparently the vehicle she came in, developed a fault on the road while they were on their way, fixing it took all day and they decided to rest before continuing the journing the next day.

I felt sorry for her, that she had to go through all that stress but at the same time, I was elated and relieved that things fall into place.I got into the house and met my mom in the sitting room, after I said hello to her, the next thing she said was, "Hope you know I'm not going to drop you off till tomorrow, get your things arranged and I will drop you as early as possible in the morning" I had really no objections and I wasn't pissed or disappointed, she complimented my new hair and I went to my room

I had plans of arranging my stuff that night but I was way too stressed to even think of it or food. I changed into an oversized T-shirt and tucked myself in on my bed, I slept almost immediately,I woke up quite earlier than I will have loved to.I think the fact I was tired, contributed a lot to the fact that I could sleep at all

I usually can't sleep a night to my big days, big days could be referred to as birthdays, dates, school resumption, maybe a presentation or anything I'm constantly looking forward to. I woke up 3am and I was as "hungry as a hog", considering I didn't anything throughout the previous except the muffins and soda.

I went the kitchen for a midnight snack but there was basically nothing I could easily eat, no biscuits or pastries, I made noodles and made tea, I took the tea and noodles to my room, while it was cooling off.

I got distracted and I picked up my phone, I went straight to Grima and started watching funny videos and chuckling, then I saw a notification and just knew it was him.

"Do you ever sleep?" of course I do, like who doesn't. He sent a laughing emoji and asked when I was planning on coming back to college, told him of my plans to come to school the previous day and how it was ruined, hopefully, if not comes up today, I should be in college by 10 am, he wished me a safe journey and a good night, I finished arranging my stuff and slept back.

I kept dragging and gisting the next morning, as much I threatened my mom, about moving back to school soon, after every one of our arguments, I was going to miss her and my room especially, my siblings too though.

The truth is that I was having cold feet, College wasn't an easy place to be and I wasn't so sure I was quite ready. During the break, I did a lot of reviewing, I tabled out the problems I had in college and I put certain structures in place, but I wasn't sure if there were going to be 100 percent efficient.

I was on my phone when my mom said if I wasn't ready in the next hour, she wasn't going to drop me off at college anymore. I honestly wished my elder sister, Emily was home, she will be the one to drop me off and I could do things at my pace. I got up, had my bath, and moved my stuff to the sitting room.

It was raining heavily when we got to college. My mom blamed me for wasting so much time and how I ruined her plans for the day. I moved my stuff to the gate of my dormitory, just as I came to bid her goodbye, I saw the one person I will have rather not seen, Greg Norman.