A Broken Luna

Chapter 10: I'm Finally Free...

Roxanne

‘What the hell?’ was all I can think. I have never seen Jessica act this way. Her face was filled with so much sadness and pain that anyone with working eyes could see that my best friend, my sister…

… was broken.

Not to mention the aura she gave off to Alexander. There was so much rage—pure rage—filling the room you could cut it with a knife. What did Alexander do to her? Is there something she’s not telling me? Did he do something to her in the past? I need to find out and get to the bottom of this because if for someone reason this man had did any harm to her in the past, mate or not I will light his ass up.

“Did you do something to her?” I asked Alexander without looking at him.

“I’m sorry?” He asked while sounding confused at my question.

“Did you…do something… to her?” I asked him again, saying it slow enough for him to digest the question.

He was quiet for a few minutes before saying, “I have never met that woman in my life before today. I still really don’t know her aside that she’s a friend of yours.”

I turned around quickly, “What?” When I looked at him, I was searching hard for something. A sign indicating that he was hiding something or maybe even lying but all I saw was confusion. “If that is true, why did she give you such a death stare?” I asked him with my arms crossing my chest.

He looked back at the door for a moment then back at me and shrugged. “I honestly don’t know, but whatever pressed her it must have been huge because I was barely able to suppress her.” He said.

“What do you mean by that?”

“When wolves are feeling intense emotion sometimes it is hard for them to contain themselves. Two emotions in particular are the hardest. One being love,” he smiles and winks at me “and the other rage. As the Supreme Alpha, I can suppress these emotions and prevent someone from changing. Sometimes I could look at them quickly and they submit to me, but your friend is different.” He points his thumb at the door. “Your friend had so much rage, that I didn’t affect her. She stopped changing at her own free will.”

That’s it, I got to go see her. I have seen Jessica get pissed off at someone knocking coffee on her or when a*****e ran out of her favorite perfume, but never have I ever seen her this mad.

“I got to talk to her.” I said walking towards the door. Alexander touched my shoulder and shook his head. I shook his hand off me.

“Why are you shaking your head for? You think I’m going to stand here and just let her leave like that?” I said to him in annoyance. “I know you are my mate, but you will not control my actions.”

As my hand touched the doorknob, I heard a deep voice behind me. “He’s right.”

When I look back, I saw Jess’s father standing at the door with his glass of drink. He knows what’s up with her and he just let her leave like that? What kind of a father is he?

“Roxy, Jessica has been going through a tough time right now, this is not the first time she’s had this, uh, reaction. She really does want some space. If you talk to her now, you are just adding more fuel to the fire. Please let her calm down and she will talk to you tomorrow.” He says while he calmly sips his drink while looking at me.

I started back at him, something about Jonathan is off. When he spoke to me, my body got a chill and I could have sworn I saw something black surround his body. I just shook it off. Regardless of how creepy this man is, he probably is right. When I see her, she is going to get an earful from me.

“Darling, let us go back to the party. You still have guests here.” He says to me while holding my shoulders and gently pushing me towards the patio. When I looked up at him, I noticed he was staring at the door.

“Alexander?” I asked him. He looked at me quickly and smiled, trying to quickly recover.

“Don’t worry love, I was just thinking.” He said and proceeded to push me further.

Oh Jessica, I hope you are okay.

Jessica

There is nothing left for me. All the hope, the happiness that I once had was replaced with anger, hatred, and most of all pain. The pain of a broken heart. I knew I could not have Roxy; I knew it the day my mom left us. If anyone were to every find out that I, the Beta’s daughter, was in love with Roxy, the Alpha’s daughter, it would bring shame to the family, and my father despises anything that would bring us anymore shame.

Despite knowing all of this, knowing that I could never be with her the way I want there was always hope. Hope that one day I can tell her my true feelings and have her all to myself. Hope that me and her could get together and run away from all this pain and live our lives together; a happily ever after. But all of that is gone. There was no hope for me, not even an ounce of hope resides in my right now. All I can feel is pain, a pain that I fear will never go away.

After I left the party, I ran home. There was no reason for me to be there anymore. The more I see them—that damn Alexander and Roxy—together, the angrier I got. When I looked at him, I was ready to challenge him. In fact, I did challenge him. I do not care that he is a Supreme Alpha and I damn well do not care how strong he is, I would either fight to keep my love or die trying.

The rage in me was so strong I wanted to fight him right there, but it is her birthday. I did not want to ruin it for her. So, my only option was to run.

Running was my only way of escape, my only way to calm down and to ease this internal pain. Even though my house is miles away from hers, I still ran. While my legs grew tired and complained, I still ran.

Running was all I got now.

When I finally reached home, there was a little relief. I knew my dad was still at the party and my brothers were busy doing who knows what. I would be left alone, and that is all I want.

As I opened the door, I was greeted by one of the servants. “Hello Jessica, how was the…” she started to say but trailed off when she finally got a good look of me. We stood there, staring at each other for what feels like a long time. Finally, she cleared her throat and looked away.

“My father is still out. Can you have someone get my car form the Alpha’s house?” I asked while still staring at her. I knew this was making her uncomfortable but at this point I didn’t care about anything.

She nodded, “Yes ma’am” and walked away.

My body used all the strength it had left to climb the 3 flights steps and into my bathroom. Hopefully, a little shower could help me. When I walked in and turned on the bathroom light, I had to shield my eyes.

“Damn why is this bathroom so light?” I said to myself as I walked up to the mirror over the sink. This bathroom brings so much memories but the one that hits hard is when she came over and did my make up for the first time. After the make up was done she looked at me and called me beautiful. That was the first time she said that to me, and it made my heart melt.

Looking at the mirror now, she could be more wrong about me. I did not feel beautiful, I felt pitiful; a disgusting worthless, ugly, beast.

“Why does pain find its way back to me? Why must this happen to me?” I asked myself in the mirror. My reflection morphed into the child version of me, the child that was bullied and abused without a mom. She looked at me with so much pain that tears started to fall.

“You know daddy says no. We can not disobey him. We must not be a failure like mommy.” The little me in the mirror says then changes back to the hideous me. The me with the mascara smeared all around my eyes, my cheeks flaming red with stress bumps forming; red lipstick smeared all over.

‘No wonder why she doesn’t love us.’ I heard a voice say to me. ‘No wonder she chose him over you. You let your father control you. She does not want a weak pathetic mate; she wants a strong one.’

“No… no… no… NO!” I screamed and punched the mirror. The mirror shattered every where scratching my face, arms, and chest.

Every ‘no’ I screamed led to another punch in the mirror.

“Why me?” I cried while falling to the ground. The pain of the glass shards tries to consume me but the pain that I feel in my heart took over. There was nothing, I could feel nothing.

Someone banged on the door.

“Jess, Jess are you okay?” One of my older brother Caden says while growling.

“We heard screaming, and something break, is someone in there with you? Are you in danger?” My other brother yells. When I did not respond the burst through the bathroom door, breaking it. They came in, ready to shift and attack, but only saw a sad pitiful person sitting on the floor.

“What happened in here, Jess?” Caden says to me. I could not look at them.

They paused for a while before reaching me and helping me up. They did not speak anymore just let me sit in silence. I know what they are thinking, they think my dad hurt me again like he usually does when I do something that could tarnish his name; so, they do not say anything to me. When Josh tried to pick out the pieces of glass, I shook my head and said, “No” while walking away from them and into my room. I need to feel something before I completely go numb.

They did not call my name out nor did they stop me, they just cleaned up the bathroom in silence.

Once I got into my room, I locked the door and feel to the floor. ‘They would never understand.’ I thought to myself and tears started to fall again. For hours I sat there, crying so much that I had no more tears to shed and throat rasped from yelling.

“I don not want to feel this pain anymore.” I said out loud. “I’m so tired.

‘Wouldn’t it be nice to finally let all of this go?’ the voice says. I was in too much pain to realize that this voice was not of my own. ‘Wouldn’t it be nice to no longer feel anger, pain…love?” This voice was mesmerizing, as if she knows I want to hear those words. My body stared to tingle.

“Yes.” I responded out loud.

‘Don’t you want to be free from a world that tells us who we can and cannot love?’ She continues, her words giving me strength that I thought I lost. I rose from where I was sitting and looked out the window. This voice was soothing, almost angelic. I’ve never heard anything like it before in my life.

Is this the voice of the moon goddess?

‘Do you wish to b free from this torment?’

“Yes.” I responded again while walking to the window.

‘Do you want to be FREE?’ She asked

“Yes! I do want to be free from this. I want to be free from everything, the hurt, the pain.” I opened the window and stood in it.

‘My child, what you are feeling is a wounded mated heart. Most people die from it, but you my child is special. I will make you so powerful so strong that no one, not even Alexander can stand against you. Do you want that freedom?’ The voice says.

“YES!” I screamed “Please, I beg you.”

‘Your body knows what must be done.’

I looked at the sky. The moon and the starts were bright, as if it were shining right on me. The air danced across my cheeks, cooling my flaming red cheeks. The hope that I had lost was now back. Hope that I can finally gain my freedom. To be free from my father, Roxy and to be free from myself.  Then I looked down at the ground, the luscious green grass that is three stories down is calling me, waiting to finally set me free.

But is this the way to go?

‘Do it.’

Will anyone miss me or mourn over me?

‘Do it.’

Will Roxy love me? Will she grieve over me?

‘Do it.’

Will my dad finally love me or the people that bullied me have regret?

Will I finally be free?

‘DO IT!’ The voice shouts.

Looking at the sky again, I stretched my arms to the side and leaned forward.

“I’m finally free.” Was the only thing I could say before completely falling forward. When my body fell, downward the gush of air soothed all my doubts, eased all my pain, and relaxed me. I watched as I got closer to the floor. There were no doubts, just affirmation that this was the right thing to do. I was meant to do this, and I was going to get my wish; to be free.

As my body were inches away from the ground, I closed my eyes and prepared for what is about to come. The voice that finally was going to grant me my said one last thing before I succumbed to the darkness.

‘The path to your freedom starts now.’

And then there was nothing.