Reckless

Chapter 30

I think the whole house would feel really empty and I would feel the same too. Hindi ko talaga alam ang gagawin ko kapag wala si Brion sa piling ko. I’ll do everything for him to give him a peaceful and happy life. I can actually sacrifice everything for him. Sigurado ako na ganun din ang nararamdaman ni Louis.

“Look at his pictures,” Sabi ni Louis at ibinigay sa’kin ang kanyang cellphone.

Ngumiti ako habang tinitignan ‘yon. There’s still a lot of pictures that he hasn’t sent me.

“Send mo ‘to sa’kin,” Sabi ko.

“Sure,” Sabi nito.

Nag iiscroll pa ako ng biglang may nag appear na notif sa phone niya.

‘Where are you? I came to your house today and you’re not there. I miss you.’ Kumunot ang noo ko.

Tumingin si Louis sa’kin sabay tingin sa cellphone niya.

He gently remove his phone away from my hands. So he does have a girlfriend?

I see. It’s fine. It’s not like a big deal.

I told him I wasn’t interested anymore. But why did he ask me to try it again with him when he has a girlfriend?

That’s f****d up. I feel bad for the girl. She was waiting for him, yet he’s trying to reconcile with his old lover.

Kung kaya niya yun gawin sa iba, eh kaya niya din gawin ‘yon sa’kin. Inabot sa’kin ulit ni Louis ang phone niya pero tinignan ko lang ‘yon.

“It’s fine. Just send me the pictures.” I said.

I’m not jealous, okay? I’m just disappointed on how he acted.

He has a girlfriend yet he asked me to patch things up between us. Hindi na siya nagsalita pa at binawi nalang ang kanyang cellphone. I looked at Brion who’s currently playing with his foods. Saglit ko lang inalis ang tingin ko eh.

“Brion… it’s bad to play with food, okay?” Sabi ko.

He just giggled and still play with it. When taking care of a child. A lot of patience is needed.

Sobrang mainitin ang ulo ko noon, pero nung ako na ang nagaalaga kay Brion unti unti na din ako natutong habaan ang pasensya. Kapag hinayaan ko lang na mairita ako sakanya, baka mas lalo pa siyang maging pasaway.

I learned a lot by watching youtube videos. Yun nga ang pang paantok ko eh. Lagi akong nanonood on how to discipline a child at kung ano ano pa. They’re really helpful kasi based on experience eh. Galing sa mga nanay.

Wala naman kasi ako masyado mapagtanungan dahil wala na si mama. Si lola minsan tinatawagan ko, pero si tita hindi pa.

I mean, we’re good, but not that close. Mas nakakausap ko si lola dahil siya ang laging pumupunta dito at siya ang palaging available. Busy din si tita sa trabaho niya. She’s a doctor.

Nagtaka nga ako bakit ayaw din mag doctor ni Louis, pero ang sabi niya hindi talaga ‘yun ang hilig or gusto niya. He wants to be a business man. Something related to money, stocks, basta mga ganun.

Buti nga siya ay may choice, ako wala. Mother left me the company which leaves me no choice but to handle it. Hindi na rin ako nag isip ng gusto kong gawin in the future. Ayos naman na ito. I can’t just throw or abandon what my mom build.

Si lolo ko pa ang may ari ng kumpanya na ‘to and it was passed to my mother, then to me.

After eating dinner, dinala ko na sa kwarto si Brion. Si Louis ay naiwan doon dahil may tumawag sakanya.

Maybe it was the one who messaged him too. Bakit naman hinahanap siya?

Didn’t he tell her at least where he went? Whatever. That’s their problem and not mine.

“Let’s take a quick bath, okay?” I said and he started crying.

“Shh… why, honey? It will only took a minute, okay?” Umiiyak pa din siya. I sighed.

Kumatok si Louis sa kwarto at hinayaan ko siyang pumasok. Hindi ko naman nilock ang pinto dahil alam kong susunod siya dito.

“Why is he crying?” “Liliguan ko sana,” Sabi ko.

He picked up a duck and boat toy and put it on the tub. Tumahimik si Brion at pinanood kung anong ginagawa ni daddy niya.

“Look oh, the duck and boat is floating. They enjoy floating in the water.” Sabi ni Louis.

Agad namang binuksan ni Brion ang dalawa niyang kamay at nagpapabuhat na kay Louis. Ganun lang pala dapat. He’s much better with me with kids. Sabagay, mayroon siyang mga kapatid na may anak na sa US.

I’ve seen it on his social media. Hindi ko naman kasi siya inunfriend or binlock. I open my f*******:, but I don’t use it to post or do anything just watch people’s lives.

Now, Brion’s enjoying his bath on his little bath tub. Si Louis na ang gumawa ng lahat at ako ay pinapanood lang sila at pinicturan na din.

Time flies and it’s already been a week since Louis arrived here. As long as he wants to stay, things are still not good in their company in US.

“Wait for daddy okay? I’ll be back.” Sabi nito kay Brion.

Si Brion naman ay nalulungkot tila naiintindihan ang sinsasabi ng daddy niya. He looks really sad.

“I’ll be back once I fix things at the company,” Sabi niya sa’kin.

“Yeah, sure. Take care.” Sabi ko.

Wala din naman akong pake kung kailan siya babalik. I’m respecting his rights as Brion’s father. Hindi ko naman sila puwedeng pagbawalan magkita.

Naawa lang din ako kay Brion ngayon dahil parang ayaw niya paalisin si Louis. Nakakapit pa din ito sa jacket niya.

“Brion let go of dada na, baka malate siya sa flight niya.” Sabi ko.

Nagsimula na umiyak si Brion at kumapit lalo kay Louis. I don’t know how he understands us, but I think he already feels that Louis is leaving.

“I’m sorry, dada will be back okay? I’ll get back as soon as I can.” Sabi ni Louis at ngumiti pero kita ko sa muka niya na malungkot siya.

I know this would be hard for him. Pero paano nalang sa future?

What if he’s free to come here anytime?

Ano lagi nalang siya nandito?

I mean I’m not against it… but what if I have a boyfriend that time already? Things will get messy.