Reckless

Chapter 12

It's not like we're still in a relationship?

He doesn't need to clean my face and even put my skin care every time I fall asleep with make up on. Inayos ko ang sarili ko. I need to be a mother to Brion.

Luckily, I woke up early. I hope he's still sleeping para pag gising niya ako ang makita niya. Si lola ay natanaw ko sa baba, She's in front of the window sipping in a cup of tea.

Of course old people tend to woke up early, Dati nga ay alas tres ng umaga gising na siya.

"Hi Brion... Good morning." I smiled.

Saktong pag pasok ko ay nakatingin siya sa'kin. I guess wala pang pumupunta sa kanya dito.

"How was your sleep?"

"Daddy slept beside me." He said in a happy tone.

What? Then where's Louis? Bumukas ang pintuan at bumungad si Louis na nakaputing shirt at sweatshorts, carrying a baby bottle. Iniwas ko ang tingin ko ng magtama ang tingin namin.

What happened to us?

I was pregnant. Hindi ko sinabi sakanya. I was too scared he might not be ready to be a father. We're young and I don't think he's ready neither am I.

I know his dreams and he always reminds me of it everyday. I don't want to ruin it. I can take care of my own child and I'm sure my mom won't leave me.

My phone keeps ringing like crazy. I've been avoiding Louis, pati na rin sila Denise. I'm really scared. Hindi pa alam ni mama 'to and I don't know what will be her reaction.

"Mom?" I said when she answered my call. I'm currently staying in a hotel here in Palawan.

I can't return to the villa.

"Katherine! How's your long vacation with Louis there?" She asked and I can see her face smiling.

She's happy for me, but I don't think she still will if she knew about it.

"Mom..." I sob. When I heard my mom's worried voice.

I just burst out crying. I can't lie to my mom. Humagulgol ako. I can hear her hushing me from the other line.

"Kath please talk clearly... how am I able understand you?"

"I'm carrying a baby mom. It's been two weeks." Iyak ko.

I didn't expect all of these to happen. I'm young and I don't know how that works... I thought he used a protection.

"I'll book you a flight." Mom said.

I agreed and ended the call, hindi nagtagal mom sent me the details of my flight. I'm so sorry Louis.

I flew back to Manila and went to our secret house so Louis won't find me. My phone died at wala akong balak i-charge yun. I avoided everything.

I almost shut my mom off pero hindi siya sumuko sa'kin. Sa mood swings ko, sa food cravings, she helped me with everything. She didn't leave by my side.

"Katherine! Fuckin open this door, now!" I shivered when I heard Louis's voice. Oh no.

"Tell him anak... he deserves to know."

"No mom... he's not ready." "But he did that, he's supposed to be ready anytime."

No... I won't tell him anything about my condition. Tumayo ako at binuksan ang pinto. He looks so tired, His face features softened when he saw me.

Lumapit siya sa'kin at niyakap ako. He hold me like I'm a fragile thing to hold. Umiyak ako, tuloy tuloy ang daloy ng aking luha.

"Katherine... where have you been? Don't leave me again like that." He said.

"I'm sorry..."

"Shh... you can tell me everything later." He said with assurance.

This can't wait...

"No Louis... I don't love you anymore." Naestatwa siya.

I feel guilty just saying that in front of him, it's not true but it's for the best. It's better if he won't knew about this.

"No... you're lying... that's not true baby. C'mon tell me what's wrong?" He said with frustration in his eyes.

He cupped my cheeks and wiped my tears with his thumb. How can I leave someone this perfect?

"I'm sorry Louis... sorry." Iyak ko.

I don't deserve him. He deserve more, Madami pa siyang pwedeng gawin. Tinaggal ko ng unti-unti ang kamay niya at sinara ang pintuan. That's the last day I saw Louis. Lumalaki na ang tiyan ko kaya lalo akong umiiwas na lumabas ng bahay.

I want to keep it a secret. Pag lumabas na nanganak ako, Louis wouldn't think twice 'cause he knows he's the only man I did it with. Worst thing happened. Mom died because of a heart attack. It was too sudden. I wasn't ready.

I was too dependent to her when it comes to Brion. I don't have anyone with me but my child since si ate Danicah ay nasa US. I didn't have the choice but to adjust and take care of the company. Our lawyer talked to me and he told me that mom transferred everything to me.

Literally everything. There wasn't any title with ate Danicah's name. Why me? Mom? A year after my mom died. Sobrang stress ko dahil pinagsasabay ko ang work at pag aalaga kay Brion.

I hired a nanny, but of course I still want to be a mother to my child. But because I want to lessen the stress that I'm feeling, I party every night and drink until I get drunk.

I probably kissed a lot of people already since I kiss anyone who's close to me when I'm drunk. One day... Our paths met.

Louis is sitting with two girls. He's making out with the other one. Ibang iba ang itsura niya ngayon.

Nasasaktan ako... pero I deserve this. Pinakawalan ko siya at tinaboy and now he's free and trying to find his happiness. Our eyes accidentally met. He turned into a cold person.

Binitawan niya yung dalawang babae at hindi inalis ang tingin sa'kin. I turned around and left. I sat in the high chair malapit sa bar area.

"Bourbon please," Lumingon ako. It's Louis. The guy gave him the shot, tinaas niya 'yon at tinignan ako like he's having a cheers with me.

Hindi ako makaimik. I can't move. Nakaupo lang ako at hindi ko alam ang gagawin o ang sasabihin ko.

"Why are you here? I thought you disappeared for good." He said and laughed sarcastically.