Reckless

Chapter 57

“What happened has already happened. At least we both know now what really broke the both of us. We’re having a closure--”

Hindi pa ako natapos magsalita ay hinalikan niya na ako. As much as I want to stop, I just couldn’t. I miss his damn kisses.

His hands are slowly touching every inch of my body just like he did before.

“You got skinnier.” Sabi niya.

Yes I did. I don’t eat a lot. Kung hindi ako inaaya na kumain ni GIo ay hindi talaga ako kakain.

“Louis…” I said with a very weak voice.

“You can stop me if you want,” Sabi nito at hinihingal na sa halikan naming dalawa.

But I don’t what him to stop. f**k. What the hell is wrong with me?

“Someone’s waiting for me downstairs.” Sabi ko.

I feel bad. Gio told me that he likes me at sinabi niyang hihintayin niya ako. I told him something that could make him think that he has a chance, tapos eto ako ngayon kasama si Louis sa kwarto ko.

”You can go back if you wish for us to continue,” Sabi nito.

Hindi ako nagsalita,. Naglakad ako palabas ng kwarto at lumingon muna ako bago tuluyang lumabas.

Should I go back to that room after telling Gio that we won’t be going to the office together?

Pagkababa ko ng hagdan ay nasa sofa si Gio nakaabang. Hindi nagtagal ay nagtama na din ang aming mata dahil sa hagdan lang din naman siya nakatingin.

“You didn’t change your clothes,” Sabi nito.

Tinignan ko ang suot ko. Hindi nga. Pag pasok ko ng kwarto ko ay nakipagtalo pa ako kay Louis.

“I’m sorry, I don’t feel well. I might skip work today.” Sabi ko.

“Do you want me to call a doctor?” Tanong niya.

Oh God, I feel so bad.

Umiling ako at sinabing, “No, I’m fine. Napagod lang yata ako kahapon. I just need to rest. Kung hindi na masama ang pakiramdam ko mamaya, baka pumasok ako ng office.” Sabi ko.

“No need. You should rest today. Sabi ko naman sa’yo na ayos lang kung isang linggo ka hindi papasok sa opisina. I can take care of it.”

Hindi tuloy ako makatingin ng diretso kay Gio. I feel like I’m doing something illegal. He’s too kind for me. He’s not suspecting me or anything..

Pero sabagay, single naman ako. It’s okay for me to be free. It’s not like he owns me, but it just doesn’t feel right if I entertain Gio as I try to fix things with Louis.

“I think you should really rest. Should I escort you to your room? You look weak.”

Nabuhayan ako sa sinabi nya. Hindi niya ako pwedeng samahan doon dahil pag bukas palang ng pintuan ay makikita niya na si Louis.

”Hindi na. I can handle myself. Baka may mga dapat ka pa gawin. Thank you for making sure that I’m okay, Gio. I really appreciate it.”

“My house is just near--”

“I know it’s not. Don’t worry. I’ll be fine.” Sabi ko at ngumiti.

“I’ll go now then. May mga kailangan pang gawin sa office.”

“Okay. Take care. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Magpagaling ka. I’ll see you whenever you’re ready to go back to work.” Sabi niya.

He’s not pressuring me to go to the office to work despite of the workload that I’ve left. Wala din talaga ako sa mood pumasok ngayon dahil anong oras na at sobrang sakit ng ulo ko dahil sa kagabi.

“Thank you.”

“About the Psychiatrist though, you should see her this week.”

“I understand. I’ll tell you when I’m gonna be ready to be checked.” Sabi ko.

He nodded. Hindi na siya nagtagal pa at umalis na ng bahay. Sinigurado ko na nakalabas na siya ng gate dahil kung sakaling babalik pa siya, sasabihan na ulit ako ng guard. I’ll be informed first.

Ayoko din sana kasi maabutan niya ako na may kasamang ibang lalaki. And it will seem like I’m hiding Louis from him.

Naglakad ako paakyat at napapaisip ako kung babalik pa ba ako kay Louis. f**k. I don’t know. I feel like I still kinda love hiim and I want to do it with him. Hindi kaya natutukso lang ako dahil matagal na akong hindi nakikipag s*x?

I don’t know, but I’m already opening the door of my room.

Pag pasok ko ay pabalik balik si Louis sa paglalakad. Napatingin siya sa’kin at nung makita niya ako ay nagulat siya at bigla akong niyakap.

“I thought you don’t want me anymore.” Sabi niya.

He kissed me and then I kissed him back. I stopped to catch my breath and said, “But you have a girlfriend.” Sabi ko.

“I broke up with her this morning. I was already planning too so I could focus on making things work for the both of us.”

His hand travel down to my thighs. Napapikit ako sa sensasyon na nararamdaman ko. Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko at hinalikan ko siya ng mas malalim sa ginawa niya kanina.

I slid my tongue inside his mouth and he did the same. He’s teasing me down there with my underwear still intact.

Fuck. I’m so wet right now. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang init na binibigay niya. His hand and his body is warm. I’m not used to it.

I’ve never been close to any guy like this since we broke up.

Pinasok niya ang kamay niya at dumulas kaagad ang kanyang daliri.

“f**k, you’re so wet already,” Sabi niya.

I moaned as he move his finger to my c**t, teasing it. Hindi ko mapigilang manginig. It’s been so long since I’ve been touch.

I’ll be honest, I tried to touch myself maybe one or twice a month just so that I wouldn’t long for it. Pero iba talaga kung ibang tao ang humahawak.

Louis knows my weaknesses and how to pleasure me with his body. He carried me and put me down to bed. He kissed me again and put his finger inside me.

“You got tight.”

“I never had s*x again ever since we stopped seeing each other.”

Nung buntis ako ay halos mabaliw ako. My s****l desire is heightened. Halos every week ko pinepleasure ang sarili ko. The doctor said I can o****m.

My OB was a woman, so I was comfortable talking with her and she’s a professional kaya naman hindi na bago sakanya ang mga ganun.