Lightless Sunshine

Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Pinanuod ko ang papalayong bulto ni Eleazar. Sobrang gaan ng aking dibdib at para akong natanggalan ng tinik sa lalamunan pagkatapos nang yakap na iyon. At last, I could finally let go of this heavy pain on my chest. Nalulungkot ako dahil sa mga ala-alang hanggang sa nakaraan nalang ngunit sa kabilang banda ay masaya rin ako dahil alam kong napalaya na rin namin ang isa't isa.

We may love each other but that love weren't enough for us to stay and hold on one-another. There are things better off unattached.

"Are you okay?" A deep baritone voice from behind spoke all of a sudden. Napasinghap ako at napapitlag. Napahawak ako sa dibdib sa sobrang gulat. I looked at him sharply and his brows shot up. "Why?" he asked innocently.

Tumikhim ako. "Uh, uuwi ka na rin ba? Salamat pala sa pagpunta sa birthday ko. It means a lot."

"Yeah, and thanks for inviting me. Ang sasarap ng mga pagkaing niluto niyo,"

"Sus, wala 'yon." ngiti ko sabay kumpas ng palad sa ere. "By the way, nasaan na pala si, uhm, Grettle?" kunwa' y tanong ko.

He shrugged off his shoulder. "She's with her boyfriend. Hinatid siya pauwi sa bahay nila. Her mom called few minutes after the dinner saying—"

"What?!" nanlalaki ang mga matang putol ko sa kaniyang sinasabi. Napamaang ako at halos lumuwa na ang mga mata.

My jaw dropped.

"The Yohan guy? You know him, right?" he asked with his brows knitted. Tumango naman ako. "Well, he sent Grettle home—"

"W-What do you mean?" nauutal kong saad.

Mas lalong nagsalubong ang kilay niya. Confusion was all written on his face. "Ha?"

"Hakdog." pagtatapos ni Sinon na biglaan na lamang sumulpot sa kung saan. He has a paper bag on his hand, definitely the said 'balot' na sinabi ko kanina kay Tita. "As so you know, Grettle and Icarus broke up. Wawa, 'no?"

I gasped unbelievably with a happiness and excitement obviously dancing in my eyes. Napatikhim ako. I mentally scolded myself. Ugh! I hate myself for feeling this way. Instead of cheering up the guy who showed nothing but care and support for me, I even felt happy knowing that he was no longer committed to someone.

"Ah, really? Kaylan pa? Ba't parang hindi ko ata alam?" maang na tanong ko.

Kung talagang naghiwalay sila, I should've known. Bestfriend ko ang kapatid ni Icarus and she tells me everything. Even her darkest secret.

Sinon shrugged his shoulder. "Well, none of them declared it until we saw Grettle dating another man."

Mas lalo akong naintriga. "Oh? Talaga? Luh, ang daya ba't di ko knows 'to?" nguso ko.

"Bakit? Required ba na dapat alam mo lahat?" pabalang na sagot niya at umirap sa akin. "Eto kasi 'yan, mga one month na ata ang nakalipas nang magbreak sila, first time in the history hindi pumasok si Icarus sa klase kaya we came to an assumption na sadboi ang futah! Ta's hindi nga kami nagkamali dahil narinig kong may naming may ka-video call si Grettle na lalaki tapos—"

"Chismoso." natahimik bigla si Sinon nang marinig ang bulong ni Icarus. Nasamid naman ako sa sariling laway. Sinon's face was unreadable. He looks offended, hurt and embarrassed by the choice of word Icarus' have said.

Pinigilan kong matawa.

"Ha? May narinig ka ba, Sunshine? Parang may narinig ata akong engkantong nagsalita." Sinon said, trying to save himself from the embarrassment.

"Buang ka talaga!" tawa ko sabay sapak sa kaniyang braso

Umiwas naman siya habang ngumunguso. "Bwesit ka, boi?" aniya habang nakatingin kay Icarus. Ang huli naman ay parang walang paki-alam dahil nakatingin lamang ito sa akin.

Unti-unting nawala ang ngiti ko at kasabay noo'y paglakas ng t***k ng aking puso. Napakunot ang aking noo upang itago ang pagkailang sa kaniyang pagkakatitig.

Ngumiti siya sa akin. His hazel brown eyes glinted in excitement. "Available ka pa rin ba ngayon?" he asked.

Umawang ang aking labi.

"Luh? Bata iyan, Icarus! Off-limits na tayo diyan! Ano ka, pedophile?" Sinon protectively hissed and blocked Icarus' body from my sight. Nawala tuloy siya sa paningin ko. "Don't you f*****g dare, bro." there was a threatening tone on his voice.

Gone the cheerful and playful Sinon. It was replaced by his brother-like instinct. Naasiwa naman kaagad ako. What was this guy thinking all about? Parang nilipad ata ang utak nito nang magkabagyo noong nakaraan. Kung saan napapadpad.

"What are you talking about?! It's not what you think it is, dumbass!" Icarus' voice seems mad and quite offended. "I was referring for something! Jesus Christ! What's gotten on you?"

"What? You asked her if she's available! What do you think I'll be thinking in that kind of a question?!" singhal niya.

Tumingkayad ako upang masilid si Icarus. His face gone red. Nasa mukha niya ang sobrang pagpipigil sa sarili na suntukin si Sinon sa mukha.

"'Tangina mo, Sinon." mariing aniya.

"'Tangina mo rin level two."

"Nye-nye." Icarus childishly rolled his eyes, shocking the hell out of me. Nahagip ng mga mata niya ang gulat kong ekspresyon at ganoon na lamang ang pagputla ng kaniyang buong mukha. "You didn't see anything!" he exclaimed in horror.

"OH... EM..." I made a very exaggerated reaction. I saw how his eyes widened in panic. Parang nag slow motion ata ang lahat nang sa isang isang hakbang lumapit sa akin si Icarus at tinakpan ang mga mata ko.

"Wala kang narinig!" sigaw niya sa nagpapanick na boses.

"I-Icarus, ano ba?!" singhal ko rito. Inis na tinanggal ko ang kamay niya sa mga mata ko at sinamaan siya ng tingin.

Humaba ang nguso niya. His ears reddened.

Tatawa-tawa naman si Sinon. "Inutil, bobo, tarantado!" he teased.

"Shut up, Sinon!"

"— Tanto, kingina mo, barumbado!" Sinon continued while laughing his ass off.

"Bayot!"

"Ha! At least, hindi pedoph—"

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Taymperst! Tumahimik nga kayo! Natutulog na roon ang ilan sa mga pinsan ko." awat ko sa batuhan nila ng mga salita.

Pareho silang natahimik.

"What's happening here?" boses iyon ni Travis mula sa likuran ko. "What the f**k were you saying? Pedophile? Who the f*****g hell he is and I'll choke him to death." there was a threat on his voice.

I looked at him with my widened eyes. "T-Travis!"

"Are they harassing you, Sunshine?" his jaw clenched as his eyes darkened.

"What the f**k?" sabay na bulalas nina Icarus at Sinon sa hindi makapaniwalang tono.

"Aren't they?" My brother once again asked.

Napasinghap ako at sunod sunod na umiling. What's with these people? Parang mali ata na pinakain ko sila kanina, ah. Kung saan-saan lumilipad ang mga utak. What was our main topic again? Ah, it's all about Icarus and Grettle's break-up. Then what the f*****g hell we got into this kind of uncomfortable conversation? Weird men with their weird kind of friendship.

"Kuya, let's go home na!" Trisha came into the view, breaking the awkward atmosphere in the air. Lumapit siya sa amin at binigyan ako ng halik sa pisngi. "Happy birthday and goodbye, Sunshine. 'Di ka ba uuwi tonight sa bahay?"

"Uh, dito ako matutulog. Sige, ingat kayo sa biyahe, ha? Salamat sa pagpunta," ngumiti ako.

"You're welcome!" she enthusiastically said. She looked at her twin and hooked her arms around his. "Let's go na?"

Travis nodded and threw a deadly glare towards the two. He then faced me with an arched brow. "You're still a baby, Sunshine. Don't entertain older guys." he firmly said.

I groaned loudly and rolled my eyes. "What were you saying, Travis? Oh, my gosh. Are you saying that they're hitting on me? My God!" I hysterically said. "They're like my older brothers!" I grimaced at the thought of dating these two.

Well, except for Icarus.

But Sinon? Yuck, I don't even see a slightest chance with it. I sees him like how I see Travis. A brother and a friend.

"I have my eyes everywhere so better f**k off, idiots." banta ni Travis sa dalawa.

They groaned in protest. Among the three of them, Travis were the serious type kind of man. He doesn't joke around or simply make an effort of reaction. While Sinon were the joker one. He loves making everything around him glow. He gives a bright sunny mood everytime he see something was gloomy. And lastly, Icarus has a multi-personality. He could sometimes be a cold one, a childish, and just a plain pain in the ass. And so as his cousins.

Sinon whistled. And I knew fist hand he has something ace on his own pocket. "Ah, rich coming from a guy who likes Krishia, the daughter of—"

"H-Hey!" Travis eyes widened. "Stop there!" he exclaimed. "Isha, let's go. Mom's waiting." dali-dali niyang hinatak si Trisha na naguguluhan sa pangyayari.

"Bye, ingat kayo!" sigaw ko at kumaway.

Nilingon muna ako ng kambal at tumango bago sumakay sa kotse nilang dalawa. I watched their engine got in to life and they drove it off back to the mansion.

Now, I was left with Sinon and Icarus. Pinameywangan ko sila sabay tingin sa wrist watch ko. "It's already late. Umuwi na nga kayo, ang iingay niyo eh."

"Yes, ma'am." Sinon sarcastically replied. Ginulo niya muna ang buhok ko. "Magpapaalam lang ako sa Tita mo bago ako aalis." at pumasok ulit siya sa loob ng bahay.

Icarus stood straight and cleared his throat.

"Why?" tanong ko.

"Uhm, have you decided already?"

My brows furrowed. "Ha?"

"About my message last night." he answered. "You know, about the..." he trailed off.

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko. "Hala! Oh, my gosh! Nakalimutan ko!" napasinghap ako. Then I remembered his message last night asking me if he could take me somewhere tonight. I forgot about it kaya hindi rin ako nakapagpaalam kina Tita at Tito.

Nakagat ko ang ibabang labi

"Can I ask you for a date?" Agad niyang sabi bago pa man ako makasagot.

Nanlaki ang mata ko.

"Walang m-malisya!" he added and flushed.

Umawang ang labi ko. Matagal bago ako nakapagsalita. "Oh... 'kay? Ayos ka lang ba?"

He averted my gaze as he nodded. "Yeah."

"Ba't namumula ka?"

"Hindi ah!"

"Namumula ka."

"Hell, no! Ba't naman ako mamumula?"

I shrugged and smirked.

"Uhm... let's use my car. Uh, so your answer is yes?" he finally composed himself. He looked at me coldly.

I grinned. "Are you blushing?"

"N-No!" he exclaimed and turned his back.

"Icarus is blushing," I teased.

"W-Why would I? Haha!" he fake a laugh.

"Weh?"

"Oo nga!"

"Okay! Sabi mo, eh." Pinatunog ko ang aking dila ng mapang asar.

"Whatever." he scoffed. "Let's get inside, paalam na muna tayo sa tito at tita mo." he said.

Nakangiting sumunod ako sa kaniya at sabay kaming nag paalam. Tito was hesitant at first but Icarus made sure that nothing bad would happen on us. Ilang beses pang mga paalala ay pinayagan na rin kami. Icarus made a promise that he'll send me back here safe and sound. Hindi pa naman masyadong malalim ang gabi at bukas pa halos lahat ng establisyemento sa buong syudad.

Lumabas na kami ng bahay at pinagbuksan niya ako ng pintuan sa sasakyan. Nakangiting pumasok ako at excited na sa pupuntahan namin. Nakita kong nagjog si Icarus para pumunta sa driver's seat after niya akong pagbuksan.

I watched him as he put on his seatbelt and started the engine. His movement were looks so calculated and stiff. No wonder he's a wise man.

Pinagmasdan ko ang kaniyang mukha. He has this define jaw that quickly caught my attention. A sharp nose, a red thin lips, a soft flawless skin on the face, a thick eyebrows and curly eyelashes. And of course, that hazel brown eyes that never fails to amaze and mesmerize me. He's a drop dead gorgeous, a head-turner, and a mortal God.

Ano kaya feeling maging boyfriend ang isang gaya niya, 'no?

Bukod sa gwapo, anak mayaman, matalino at napaka-humble, may iba pa ba siyang katangian na hindi ko alam? May flaw rin kaya ang kagaya niya?

I can't believe a man like him still exists.

I blinked and my lips parted when I realized I am starting to notice every single detail of his face and his personality. Shocks, I had never look at him that way before! I didn't even bother to notice his feature aside from his eyes.

Oh gosh... what's happening with me?

Suddenly, our eyes met.

My heartbeat ran fast as I met his hazel brown eyes. Ang lakas ng kalabog ng aking puso na animo'y gusto na nitong kumawala sa dibdib ko.

He smiled.

Hindi ko alam na may mas ibibilis pa pala ang pagtibok ng puso ko nang masilayan ko ang kaniyang ngiti. His perfect set of white teeth and the sweet smile on his lips made me hold my breath.

"Seatbelt na uy." he said.

I came back my reverie when he poked my cheek.

"H-ha?" Wala sa sariling tanong ko.

"Seatbelt," he uttered.

"Uh... Seatbelt?" tulirong tanong ko. Ano nga 'yung sinabi niya?

"Seatbelt." ulit niya.

Nanlaki ang mga mata ako. "Uhm. Ah! Seatbelt!" kiming tumawa ako.

His forehead creased.

"Uh, why?" Pilit ang ngiting tanong ko sa kaniya.

He sighed deeply and leaned forward. Nanlaki ulit ang aking mga mata.

Oh, God! What next? Hahalikan ba niya ako?

I cleared my throat and composed myself. "Anong g-gagawin mo?" nanginginig ang boses ko.

Ngumuso siya.

I gasped and my eyes widened in shock. Bakit siya ngumunguso?! Unless gusto niyang halikan ko siya, right?!

"ARE YOU GONNA KISS ME?!" sigaw ko at itinulak siya.

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

"Hmm?" Naguguluhang tanong niya.

"I SAID, ARE YOU GONNA KISS ME?!"

"Kiss?"

"Yes!"

"Uh..." Naguguluhang sabi niya at napakunot ng noo. "No."

I stopped.

"No?" dismayado kong ulit.

"Nope." he shook his head.

"Why... did you... leaned then?"

"To buckle your seat belt?" patanong na aniya at ininguso ang seatbelt ko.

"Seat belt?"

"Hmm-hmn,"

Bumaba ang tingin ko sa aking seatbelt at doon ko lang napagtanto na hindi ko pa pala naayos ang akin.

Uminit ang pisngi ko.

I saw him grinning.

I cleared my throat and looked at the window to avoid his gaze. "A-Aww?" I lamely muttered.

"Ha..." Narinig kong nang-aasar na bulong niya. "Kiss, huh?"

Napapikit ako nang mariin. Parang gusto kong magpalamun sa lupa sa sobrang kahihiyaan. s**t.

SANA NAGING HOTDOG NALANG AKO!

"Luh? May s-sinabi ba akong g-ganun?" utal-utal kong saad.

"Deny," he chuckled manly. Ah, that voice! I should stop myself from liking him once again. He clearly told me he doesn't like girls on my age and I should respect it like how he respected me.

Mas lalong uminit ang pisngi ko. "Sabi ni Tita at Tita i-uwi mo raw ako bago mag-alas dies ng gabi. Alas nuebe pasado na, oh."

Mas lalo siyang natawa. "Okay,"

"G-Good!" Nautal kong sabi.

While driving, none of us utter a word. Nakakailang na ewan. Nahihiya pa rin ako. After ko siyang i-compliment sa loob ng utak ko, in-assume ko pang hahalikan niya ako?

AAAAAAAA SHEEET.

Nakakahiya talaga.

"B-Bubuksan ko ang music, ah?" paalam ko bago binuksan ang stereo at nagpatugtog para manlang maibsan ang katahimikan sa loob ng sasakyan.

"I found her diary underneath a tree

And started reading about me

The words she'd written took me by surprise. You'd never read them in her eyes."

I closed my eyes and listened to the solemn music. s**t, nakakaantok naman ang isang 'to

"They said that she had found

The love she'd waited for

Wouldn't you know it?

She wouldn't show it,"

Napangiti ako kahit na nabubugnot na ako sa kantang' to. Maganda naman at sobrang lamig ng boses, parang boses ni— Oh, s**t.

Napaayos ako ng pagkakaupo.

Parang boses no'ng anonymous f*******: friend ko!

"When she confronted with the writing thereSimply pretended not to care

I passed it off as just in keeping with

Her total disconcerting air,"

"Hey," tawag niya sa akin.

"Bakit?"

He stole a glance at me and smiled as he shook his head. Patuloy pa rin ang pagkanta ang musika at nanatili lang ang aking tingin sa kaniya.

Lumingon ulit siya sa akin at ngumiti na naman. Natawa ako nang mahina.

"I found her diary underneath a tree,

And started reading about me...

The words began to stick and tears to flow... Her meaning now was clear to see,"

Nagulat ako nang sinabayan niya ang kanta. Baritono at malamig ang kaniyang boses na siyang nagpatayo sa mga balahibo ko.

I bit my lower lip.

"The love she'd waited for

Was someone else, not me

Wouldn't you know it?

She wouldn't show it, "

Oh, God. Mukhang aatakihin na ata ako sa puso neto. His voice alone was a music to my ears, ano pa kaya ngayon na kumakanta siya?!

"I found her diary underneath a tree,

And started reading about me...

The words began to stick and tears to flow... Her meaning now was clear to see," he continued to sing hanggang sa natagpuan ko nalang ang sariling nag-h-hum habang nakangiti.

Nang huminto na ang kotse niya ay dali dali siyang lumabas para pagbuksan ako ng pintuan. What a gentleman.

Nagpasalamat ako.

He encircled his arms around my small waist and guided me as we walk.

"Para saan ang mga ito?" Nakangiti kong tanong.

He just smiled.

Nang makaupo na kami pareho sa isang wooden bench ay inilibot ko ang aking paningin sa paligid.

The whole place was surrounded by a christmas lights hanging around the pinetrees and the other plants. There were wooden benches around and a table that has a candle on it na hindi pa nasisindihan. The air was cold and windy, the sky was filled with stars and a bright full moon dominated the whole city.

This place gives me a romantic kind of setting. My heart melted at the sight in front of me. I was greatly surprized and astounded.

"Look," he whispered near my ear and pointed somewhere through his finger. Sinundan ko iyon ng tingin at bumilog ng O ang bibig ko.

"Wow..." I gasped in amazement and covered my mouth using my hand.

From here, I could clearly watch the beautiful scenery of the whole city. The lights, the tall buildings that seems so small, the unrecognisable men and women like an ants, and the revelry of a city people.

"You like it?"

Natulala ako. "It's... magical and amazingly beautiful,"

I heard him chuckled. "Yeah, so beautiful..."

Ilang minuto ata akong nakatingin lang doon. I couldn't seem to take off my eyes from the beautiful view. Nakangiti at maluha-luha kong binalingan siya.

I caught him looking at me intently na para bang kanina pa siya nakatingin sa akin at inoobserbahan ang mukha at mga ekspresyon ko.

"Thank you," I mouthed sincerely.

We kept staring on each other's eyes. Words couldn't describe how I felt in this moment. Happiness, peace and contentment. It feels like I'm in a fairytale I don't wanna go back to reality anymore. This birthday is one of the best birthday I ever had.

"My pleasure," he winked after awhile of silence. "Kumain na tayo kanina kaya iba nalang ang dinala ko." he said. "Wait,"

Ji-nogged niya ang distansya ng kaniyang sasakyan at may inilabas doon na ecobag. When he came back, nalaman kong pagkain pala ang laman no'n. Mga junk foods to be exact.

We were both smiling as we sat on the wooden bench side by side.

"Why did you brought me here?" I asked

"It's your birthday, remember?" he opened a can of coke from the chilling container and gave it to me. "I thought of bringing you here for your sixteen birthday."

"Hmm, why?"

He shrugged and pulled out can of coke para naman sa kaniya. "I just feel of bringing you here. Dapat ba may rason pa aside that it's your special day today— I mean, tonight?"

Ngumuso ako at kinuha ang mga pagkain sa loob ng ecobag at nagbukas ng isa. "Hindi naman." mahinang sagot ko. "Nakakapagtaka lang, hindi ko ata 'to alam ang lugar na ito? Nasa maynila pa ba tayo?"

"Yeah. This place is private though." aniya sa kaswal na tono. May kinuha rin siya sa loob ng bag at nang inilabas niya iyon ay isa iyong mahabang picnic mat.

Natigil sa ere ang akmang pagsubo ko. "Private property?"

Nilagay niya sa balikat ko ang tela kaya naibsan ang ginaw na nararamdam ko kanina pa. "Yes. Why?" sagot niya.

"Hala! Shuta ka ba? Private pala 'to kaya bakit tayo na rito? Oh, my gosh! Ayokong makasuhan ng trespassing!"

"Hey, hey, relax!" he chuckled upon seeing my panicked reaction. "This property is mine. Rikha gave it to me after I graduated on elementary."

Nakahinga ako nang maluwag. "Jusko! Kinabahan ako do'n, ah? Sabihin mo kasi agad para 'di aki nagugulat nalang bigla!" pangaral ko at sinamaan siya nang tingin. "Gusto mo bang magka-heart attack ako, ha? Malayo-layo pa naman ang ospital dito!"

"You're overreacting, My Light." he laughed. "Don't worry. Kahit na hindi akin 'tong lugar na ito, hindi ka naman makukulong dahil underage ka pa."

Kinurot ko siya sa tagiliran at napaigik siya habang tatawa-tawa.

We fell into a deafening yet comfortable silence after our teasing moment. Pareho naming pinagmasdan ang tahimik at payapang lugar sa aming paligid. Both of us were holding our foods in our hand while the other one was holding our softdrinks.

"Icarus—"

"Sunshine—"

Nagkatinginan kami at natawa nang sabay kaming magsalita.

"Ikaw na mauna," he said.

I nodded and smiled. "Okay. Uhm, thank you for bringing me here. This place is one hell of a beautiful place I've ever been." sabi ko.

"No worries. I'm glad you like this place. You know, may sentimental value ito sa akin 'coz this is the first gift I received from her,"

"From Tita Veronica?"

He shook his head a bitter smiled escape from his lips. "From Rikha."

Kumunot ang noo ko pero hindi na ako nagdagdag pa ng tanong. It seems like a very personal thing based on his facial expression.

"Ikaw? Ano sasabihin mo?" tanong ko nalang.

Matagal siya bago nakasagot. Huminga muna siya nang malalim at pinakawalan ito ng may mahinang tawa. "I used to love sunrise since I can't remember. I love watching it. I love how it rises up every morning to lit up my day and to lit up my life." The corner of his lips rose up. "Sunrise means a blessing for someone like me who has been lacked of light." he uttered with a bittersweet tone on his voice.

"Hmm..." I hummed and looked at him sideways.

He suddenly chuckled na para bang may naalala siyang nakakatawa. "I came here and brought you with me to also prove one thing,"

Lumingon siya sa akin at nagtagpo ang aming mga mata. "Ano 'yon?"

He smiled sheepishly and scratched the back of his ear. "That... the sun doesn't just shines when it's daylight."

Tumaas ang kilay ko roon.

"Are you saying na dinala mo'ko rito because my name has a 'sun'?" natatawang tanong ko.

"You can say that," he said and smiled. "I always love sun but it saddens me knowing that I couldn't be able to see it when the day darkens."

Mas lalo akong natawa. "Proxy ako, ganern?"

"I didn't say that," malakaw ang pagkakangiting aniya at nagkibit balikat.

Marami pa aking naging kwentuhan ni Icarus habang kumakain at pinagmamasdan ang paligid. We talked about our lives and school stuff. He asked me what strand I would take, what courses I considers to study, what job I dreamed about. We also talked about his break-up with Grettle and we just laughed it off.

There was nothing to get hurt about with their break-up naman daw aniya dahil in the first place, matalik na kaibigan lang talaga ang tingin nila sa isa't-isa. Out of pressure and friend's teasing, they gave their friendship a shot to a next new level. And when Grettle found a new man, they decided to break apart. Buong akala ko pa naman ay na broken-hearted itong si Icarus, iyon pala ay hindi. I badly wanted to tease him. But I guess hanggang pangarap nalang na magkakaroon ako ng chance para asarin siya.

I sighed deeply while standing up. The time has come to its end and the fairytale ended as well. Ngayong papauwi na kami ay hindi ko mapigilang makaramdam ng lungkot. Sobrang ganda at nakakagaan sa loob ang lugar na ito. Parang ayokong iwan. Parang ayoko nang bumalik sa reyalidad na punong-puno ng kalungkutan at sakit. Ayoko nang bumalik pero kinakailangan.

True to their words that fairytale has always been wonderful and so magical, it feels so heavenly good. But when reality hits you, para ka na ring bumagsak mula sa langit at diretso sa empyerno.

This night was so memorable for me. For a moment, I forgot all the heavy baggages on my shoulders. I fogot the pain, fear and guilt inside my chest. I forgot I have no longer a parents to guide and protect me. I forgot I can only stand by my own without a family to steer me up. I forgot everything. Nakalimutan kong mag-isa nalang pala ako. Nakalimutan kong tinalikuran na pala ako ng lahat.

This night is so wonderful that it made my tears fell on the ground... because for the very first time in my life, I felt like a normal teenager without any responsibility within me.

Young, free and happy...