Chapter 20
2229 Words
Three months since we met...
Many things happened in those three months.
After the accident, I had temporary amnesia but thankfully my memory came back because of the help of Tita Thina and other friends but because of that... I can't sort of remember what happened to my childhood days.
Even my mom and dad's face... I can't remember.
"Kumusta ka na?" tanong sa akin ni Chae.
"Ayos lang naman," saad ko.
"Hatid na kita, ha?" tanong niya ulit.
Tumango na lang ulit ako.
Since that day, they never allowed me to commute alone. They're the ones who fetched me.
"Ihinto mo ang kotse," saad ko kay Chae nang makita ang park.
"Huh? Bakit? Hindi pa naman ito ang bahay mo, ah?" mahabang tanong niya.
"Gusto ko lang muna tignan ang palubog na araw," saad ko.
Hininto niya ang kotse sa gilid at lumabas ako. Umupo ako sa bench na nasa gilid ng puno at tumingin sa palubog na araw.
This scenery is familiar...
Sweet smile came from my mouth, and then I started remembering of what happened...
Hindi ko magalaw ang katawan ko pero naririnig ko ang bulungan ng mga tao at malinaw ko rin naririnig ang malakas na tunog ng heart rate monitor noong nasa hospital ako.
Sinubukan kong i-galaw ang kamay ko at iyon ang dahilan ng paglapit sa akin ng mga taong nagbubulungan. The loud noise makes my head hurt.
I want to shout but I can't. No sounds came from my voice.
I felt that someone came near me.
"Heina, gising na. Kakabangon mo lang diyan tapos hihiga ka na naman..." I heard his sniff and loud cry.
Who is he? And who is Heina? Where I am?
I tried to move my hands again and this time, I succeeded.
Saktong pagmulat ko ng mata ko ay tumama ang liwanag ng ilaw kaya hinintay ko na maka-adjust ang paningin ko, ganoon na rin ang pandinig ko.
I heard the doctors murmuring but I don't understand them.
"Can you hear me? If you can, please move your hand," the doctor said.
I wanted to nod but I felt that something is on my neck. That's why I followed what he said. I moved my hand.
When I finally adjusted my eyesight, I can see that all of them are looking at me, that made me confused.
“Where am I?” I wanted to ask that but I can't speak...
"Don't force yourself. After two days, you'll be able to speak again," he said.
Pagkatapos nilang i-check ang condition ko ay lumabas din naman sila.
People came in after the doctor came out. They're looking at me... worriedly. I can see in their eyes that they cried.
Nang sinubukan nilang lumapit sa akin ay lumayo ako. Kahit na hindi ko magalaw ang buo kong katawan ay sapat na para maintindihan nila ang ginawa ko. Inusog ko ng kakaunti ang aking katawan upang hindi nila ako malapitan.
Nagkatinginan sila sa isa't isa na para bang nagtataka.
Lumapit sa akin ang isang lalaki at sinundan ko lang ng paningin ito hanggang sa makaupo siya sa upuan.
"Be! Bangon na riyan. May tatapusin pa tayong business proposal, 'di ba?" naiiyak na saad niya.
Nangunot lang ang noo ko.
Sinubukan niyang hawakan ang kamay ko ngunit nilayo ko ito.
Tumawa siya. "Kahit na nasa hospital ka, ayaw mo pa rin ipahawak 'yang kamay mo kahit na kanino," aniya.
Ako naman ay lalong naguluhan.
"Amor, gaga ka talaga. Huwag mo na uulitin 'yon, ha? Ayaw ko na mawala ka," saad naman ng isang babae na singkit.
Nangunot ang noo ko ulit dahil doon.
Alin ba ang totoong pangalan ko? Heina o Amor...?
Lumipas ang dalawang linggo na sila lang ang dumadalaw sa akin. Mayroon din na magandang babae na dumadalaw sa akin ngunit paminsan-minsan lang.
Tanging suwero na lang ang nakakabit sa katawan ko hindi tulad noong nakaraan.
"Nasaan ako?" tanong ko.
Napangiti ako dahil sa wakas ay nakapagsalita na rin ako nang hindi putol-putol ang sinasabi ko. Noong nakaraang linggo kasi ay halos isa hanggang limang salita lang ang kaya kong sabihin, minsan ay hindi pa nila maintindihan.
"Ay, be! Hindi mo ba alam 'to? Nasa hospital ka," saad ng lalaki na parang bakla.
"Sino ka?" tanong ko rito.
Doon naman nanlaki ang mata nila.
"Amor, huwag ka magbiro ng ganiyan," aniya.
May isa ring lalaki na lumapit sa akin. Kumpara sa kanila, ang mata nito ay namamaga.
Nilapit niya ang mukha niya sa aking tainga at bumulong. "Heina, na-miss kita ng sobra," aniya at humagulgol.
Napatingin naman ako sa ibang taong nandirito. Nakakunot ang kanilang noo habang nakatingin sa lalaking ito.
Humarap ako sa kaniya. "Sino ka?" tanong ko rin dito.
Dahil sa tanong ko ay lalo siyang humagulgol kaya sa akin naman nalipat ang paningin ng iba.
"Hindi rin namin 'yan kilala, be. Sino ba 'yan? Ayaw niya sabihin pangalan niya," saad ulit ng lalaking bakla.
Pinapaalis nila ang lalaki ngunit hindi nila iyon magawa dahil sa lakas nito. Nang tatawag na sila ng guwardiya ay pinigilan ko sila.
"Hayaan niyo na siya," sabi ko.
May pumasok na doctor at sinuri ako. Lumabas naman lahat ng tao na nandito kanina.
"Ano ang nararamdaman mo?" tanong nito.
"Doc, sino po sila? Bakit ganoon ang ekspresyon nila? At saka, ano po ang totoo kong ngalan? Amor o Heina?" sunod-sunod kong tanong sa kaniya.
Sinuri niya ulit ako at tinanong ng kung anu-ano gaya ng kung may naaalala raw ba ako sa nakaraan ko o naaalala ko raw 'yong araw na naaksidente ako.
Iling-iling na lumabas si doc. pagkatapos ako tanungin.
Inabot ng sampung minutos bago pumasok ulit ang taong kasama ko rito kanina. Hindi gaya kanina ay 'yong lalaking tumatawag sa akin ng Heina lang ang namamaga ang mata, ngayon ay lahat sila ay lumuluha na.
"May problema ba?" tanong ko sa kanila.
Lumapit sa akin ang babaeng singkit. "Sabihin mo, naaalala mo ako 'di ba? Ako 'to si Chae!" Inalog-alog niya ako kaya hinila naman siya ng kaniyang mga kasama.
Humihikbi siyang umupo sa sofa.
"Chae?" tawag ko rito. Napatingin naman ito nang makitang tinawag ko siya. Lumiwanag din ang mukha nito at saka lumapit sa akin.
"Naaalala mo na ako?!" gulat na tanong niya.
Nahihiya naman ako tumingin. "Chae? 'Yon ba ang buo mong pangalan?" tanong ko.
Malungkot naman niya akong tinignan pagkatapos ko iyon sabihin.
Tumingin ako sa lalaking nasa gilid lang at tahimik na humahagulgol habang nakatingin sa akin.
"Anong pangalan mo?" tanong ko sa kaniya habang nakatingin dito.
Hindi siya sumagot at nagpatuloy lang sa pag-iyak.
Binuka ko ang kamay ko na animo'y nanghihingi ng yakap. Lumapit siya sa akin at ako na mismo ang yumakap sa kaniya.
Dahan-dahan kong hinagod ang likod niya dahil hindi ako masyadong makagalaw dahil sa suwero na suot-suot ko ngayon.
"It's okay. I'm fine... I will be," I said to him.
He just cried to my shoulder and I let him.
Our position is like that until he fell asleep. They carried him on the sofa so he could sleep properly.
"Heina Amor Curtis," the chinita girl said... I mean Chae.
I looked at her confusedly. "Huh?" I asked.
"That's your full name. Heina Amor Curtis," she repeated.
I nodded.
So, Heina and Amor are both my name? Surely, I look pathetic while asking that to the doctor.
"What happened to me?" I asked.
The girl sat beside me but instead of answering my question, she just brushed my hair and kissed me on the forehead.
"You should sleep and gain more energy for fast recovery, Amor," she said.
She helped me to lay down and brush my hair until I fell asleep.
The following month, I'm still struggling with everything but I'm thankful because they helped me to remember it.
Now, I'm living peacefully again. No more troubles and back to normal.
I'm just upset because I didn't have a chance to know the name of the person who carried me when the accident happened. Even his face... I forgot it.
"Are you okay?" Chae asked.
I nodded.
"Can I ask you something?" she asked.
I nodded again and faced her.
Finally the moon rised up and shined its light in its own time...
"About Uno... are you sure that it's fine to be with him? I mean, you don't really know him in person?" she asked.
I told Chae about Uno. I told her everything after my memory came back. Uno and her are now friends.
"I'm not thinking that though. It's fine to me as long as he's on my side," I said.
She stared with me with her wide eyes. "What the—Amor! Are you crazy? He's still a stranger..." she said.
I stared at the moon like I am the only one who's admiring it...
"Yes, I'm crazy—"
"You're in love with him, aren't you?" she said.
I nodded.
After those three months, I finally realised my true feelings to him. And I will confess to him on my birthday.
She sighed.
"Did Lance say something to you?" she asked out of nowhere.
I looked at her and faced her confusedly.
"I know he said something to you when both of you met... yesterday," she said.
"How did you know that we met yesterday?" I asked.
Her face is now awkward and don't know what to say. "A-ah. I just saw him. Y-yeah, I saw him," she said and laughed awkwardly.
I laughed. After that, a sigh came out to my mouth.
"He said, he's not sure if they know what happened to me or they didn't so, I should be ready, because anytime... she can take me away," I explained.
"What will happen to Uno if they forcibly take you?" she asked.
I'm just staring at the moon. It's like... I'm telling all my problems to it so that I can breath well…
"I don't know. I'm not thinking of that, anyway. I just love enjoying the present days," I said.
"Yeah..."
She left to take the car.
I stood up and walked around. We're here in the park where Uno and I bonded.
After walking by, I heard a familiar voice so I took a glance to it, that I regretted...
Tears started to fall to my cheeks and I started to breath heavily.
I saw Uno and Flair kissing each other. I thought Uno would resist it but he's the one who took Flair, that made their kiss deepened.
Based on my observing to them... Uno loves what they're doing right now.
I know he saw me but he ignored me.
Millions of thorns starting to pierce my heart. My legs started to tremble. I don't know what emotions is right now, I just felt mixed emotions.
Before my legs finally gave up, I turned around and walk away.
Buti na lang konti lang ang tao rito kaya walang nakakapansin sa akin.
I'm walking slowly and I felt tired.
I stared to the moon again but after I saw it, I cried and cried again.
Moon feels like a safe place but pain too...
"What happened?!" Chae asked.
I didn't say a word. I came closer to her and leaned on her shoulder. I cried.
She brushed my hair and rubbed my back.
"That bastard..." she whispered.
I know she saw them too because we're on the spot that's not that far to them.
She hushed. "Cry it all, Amor," she said.
We're just standing for about ten minutes until I stopped crying but I still didn't calm myself.
"Sh*t. Calm down, Amor. If Lance find out about this, he will get mad," she said.
"P-please, don't tell anything about this to h-him," I said while losing out of breath.
"Of course I won't... but you know him. He has his own ways," she said.
Inalalayan niya ako hanggang sa makapasok kami sa kotse niya. We didn't talk because she knows I hate that.
I hate it when someone's caring about me. I don't want them to worry. I don't want them to see my tears but they still did.
I feel like I am a bunch of sack in their back when I'm not fine.
This is my own problem and I will solve it on my own. I just hope that I can fight with it...
"Amor, you don't need to own your problem. You can share it with me," she said.
"Then, what will happen? The problem will move onto you? I don't want to be the source of the problem, Chae. I can do this on my own," I said.
She sighed.
"Ang tigas talaga ng ulo mo, Amor."
"Yes, of course."
I'm facing the car's window and staring at the moon while heading home.
I saw on the side mirror that she looked at me.
"I told you..." she said.
I know what she meant.
"I don't care about what I saw, Chae. It's not that it hurts," I said.
"Not that hurts?! But you were about to pass out earlier and you would just say that 'it's not that it hurts'?!" she shouted.
"It didn't. If he didn't come back to me... expect that I would really pass out," I said.
"Huh?! How did you say that without hesitating? You're calm and I'm nervous about that," she said.
"I'm serious about what I said," I said.
It's calm before the storm.
- Writer
