Miss Perfectly Imperfect

FIRST SIGHT

Gavin's POV

I sat still for a moment, staring at the door Andrew had just closed behind him. His words lingered like smoke in a sealed room.

“There are a lot of things that need to be seen…”

I agree—pero hindi tungkol sa empleyado ko. But about the girl from the past…

At sa babaeng ngayon ay tila laging may suot na maskara—isang maskarang kahit kailan ay hindi ko matanggal-tanggal sa isip ko.

Sumandal ako sa upuan, pinikit ang aking mga mata, habang ang isipan ko’y malayang gumala sa loob ng apat na sulok ng opisina kong ito. At doon, unti-unting lumakad ang alaala. Pabalik. Sa nakaraan. Sa unang pagkakataon na nagtagpo ang mga landas namin.

FLASHBACK...

Isang malamig na gabi ng Agosto, tahimik kong binabaybay ang daan ng Makati Ave gamit ang isang BMW Sedan. The cheapest among my Dad's collection, according to his words.

I drove in silence, allowing the engine sound to dominate the voice that's been constantly playing in my head. Ang mga kamay ko'y mahigpit na nakahawak sa manibela nang hindi ko namamalayan. The city lights of Makati blinked past me like ghosts – mabilis, makulay, walang laman. Dumaan sa harapan ko na parang wala lang. I couldn't even appreciate the beauty that dazzles across each road. Perhaps I needed a distraction. A way to forget my father’s words that kept ringing in my ears like a curse. Kaya napagdesisyunan kong magpalipas ng oras sa isang bar. Isa sa mga paboritong tambayan ng mga tulad kong kabilang sa sinasabi nilang elite society.

I just came from another heated argument with him. I told him I want to go back to the States to pursue my career in the modeling industry—to try my luck on the international runway. And why the States? Simply because it’s the only place where I can truly be myself, completely independent at malayo sa anino niyang kay tagal kong iniwasan. I can live freely abroad, away from the weight of expectations that have always surrounded me since I was a child. I got the chance to explore, meet new people, and immerse myself in a culture that celebrates creativity, boldness, and individuality.

Pero hindi siya pumayag. He told me I needed to stay and take over the family business. Magre-retiro na raw siya.

“Hindi kita pinag-aral sa States para lang rumampa ka ng topless o naka brief lang sa harap ng maraming tao! Hindi ako gumastos ng dolyares sa tuition fee mo para lang magbilad ka ng katawan!”

“But it’s a form of art, Dad! and my passion, too.” I tried to reason.

“Damn that passion, Luisito! 'Yan ba talaga ang plano mo sa buhay? You're wasting too much time, kaya hanggang ngayon ay wala ka pang napapatunayan!”

“Because it’s a process, Dad. And I have just started. Walang pong madali. Lahat dinadaan po sa tiyaga.”

“Exactly my point! Lahat dinadaan sa tiyaga. So if I were you, pagtiyagaan mong aralin ang negosyo. 'Yon ang maglalagay sa'yo sa pedestal.”

“Pero wala po talaga akong interest sa business, Dad. I’m afraid I might just end up disappointing you.”

"Bakit mo kinatatakutan ang isang bagay na hindi pa nangyayari? Mas matakot ka kapag hindi mo sinubukan."

"I don't know, Dad. I don't know."

“What do you want me to do then? Ipamigay ang negosyo sa mga pinsan mo? or rather let my legacy die just because you never cared?”

“Never cared? That’s not fair, Dad. I’ve always admired what you’ve built, but my passion lies elsewhere. I can’t pretend to be someone I’m not. Sana maintindihan niyo po 'yon.”

“Whatever suits you, Luisito. Pero sana maintindihan mo rin na para sa’yo ang lahat ng ito. Everything I do is for your own good. Kaya matuto ka sanang pahalagahan ang negosyong nagtaguyod sa'yo habang nando'n ka sa America, hinahabol ang sinasabi mong passion.”

“Pinahahalagahan ko naman po, Dad. I’m not trying to disrespect your hard work. I just wish you could see how much this means to me. Sadyang magkaiba lang po tayo ng pananaw sa buhay. If I can only find a way to honor your legacy, while I can also pursue my dreams, gagawin ko po. I really want to build something of my own Dad."

“Then stay here. Pursue your passion, okay! Fine with me. But don't pull that sexy stunt. Rumampa ka hanggang gusto mo, without that stunt, at dito ka lang sa Pinas. And you give yourself a chance to run the business. It should come as your first priority.”

Naririnig ba ni Daddy ang sarili niya? Fine with him, pero ang daming conditions. Kaya gusto ko talaga sa States, eh! “I’m sorry, Dad. But I have prior commitments on the line. If I won’t go back now, I might lose everything I’ve worked so hard.” Pinipilit ko pa ring ipaintindi ang lahat sa kanya.

“You have just started your career. There’s not much to lose, actually.” Ngayon ay iniinsulto niya naman ako.

“And that’s exactly why I have to go back!” Bahagyang napataas ang aking boses.

“I understand that. Believe it or not son, pero naiintindihan kita. Ilang taon din kitang hinayaang gawin ang gusto mo sa States. Pero ikaw, ni minsan ba hindi sumasagi sa isipan mo na dito ka talaga nababagay? That somehow modelling is just a kind of hobby? Ni minsan ba, hindi mo na e- consider that sometimes, embracing uncertainty leads to growth and opportunities you never imagined. Na kailangan mo lang buksan ang mga mata mo at maniwalang kaya mo. I believe in you—so you have to believe in yourself too, kasi anak kita.”

“I appreciate your trust, Dad. Na kaya ko, but it’s my future who's at stake here. It's my life, so I should be the one to decide.”

“Hindi na talaga kita kayang pigilan? Wala na ba akong magagawa para mabago pa ang isipan mo?”

I looked down and stayed silent as I heard him sigh.

“Okay. So let’s just make a deal, then.”

“What are you trying to say, Dad?”

“Ibigay mo sa akin ang dalawang taon. Two years—that’s all I ask. Get to know the business. Bigyan mo lang ng pagkakataon. But I want you to do it whole heartedly, at hindi dahil napipilitan ka lang. Buksan mo ang 'yong puso't isipan and be ready to embrace changes. Ngayon kung wala talagang mangyari after two years… pakakawalan na kita. You’ll have my full support sa kung anuman ang gusto mong gawin sa buhay mo. Just give it your all, this time. malay mo, matutunan mo rin itong mahalin sa huli."

“But, Dad...”

“Tapos ang usapan, Luisito. My decision is final. So deal with it. Pasalamat ka na lang at binigyan pa kita ng option.”

A surge of frustration bubbled up inside me, but deep down, I knew he only wanted what he thought was best for me. Yet despite that, I couldn't accept that my future now hinged on a decision I never fully understood. Still, somewhere beneath the resistance, a fragile hope stirred—maybe there was something in what he said that would make sense in time. Kailangan ko lang maniwala.

Besides, I could never win an argument with them, especially with him. I had grown up having a deep-rooted respect for my parents, and that respect came with silence—an unspoken vow not to say anything that might wound them. I can reason it out, but not to the point of disrespecting them. It was a lesson ingrained in me, a silent pact of understanding that sometimes, the greatest act of love is to listen and accept, even when it feels unjust.

Kaya sa huli ay pinili kong tumahimik na lamang. As I stood there, motionless, I realized that maybe—just maybe—this moment of silence could lead to something deeper. A connection founded not on control but on trust. I slowly stood up and turned my back on him. This conversation was over, I suppose.

“Saan ka pupunta, Luisito? Nag-uusap pa tayo.”

And here I thought na tapos na, pero hindi pa pala? Well, it's useless anyway, kung siya rin naman ang masusunod sa huli. "Tapos na po, Dad. You have made up your mind, at wala na po akong magagawa to protest."

“So, saan ka nga pupunta?”

"Since nakapagdesisyon na po kayo, then I guess; I'll probably start looking for a few good reasons to stay. Magkaro'n man lang ako ng drive to work."

“Hindi pa ba kami sapat na dahilan, Luisito?”

“Some other time, Dad.” I waive my hand and turned away with his words echoing painfully behind me. The air between us thickened with everything left unsaid. There was a growing distance once again, a chasm I didn’t know how to bridge, and it terrified me a lot. I took a deep breath, trying to steady the storm inside. I wanted to say more—to scream, even— tell him everything, but I couldn’t. Maybe one day, but tonight, silence was all I had.

Later that night…

I found myself in one of the most exclusive bars in Makati. Nagmamadali akong naglakad towards the entrance after I handed my keys to the parking valet. Mula pa lang sa labas, kita ko na ang mga nagkikislapang ilaw na bumabalot sa magarang gusali. Pero gaya ng mga ilaw sa kalsada kanina, wala rin itong naging dating sa akin.

I came here for a reason—but definitely not to fancy around. As I drew nearer, I recognized familiar faces. A blend of smoke and expensive cologne greeted me at the door. This won't work. Panandalian kong naisip. Ayokong maging si Luisito Gavin Villalobo ngayong gabi. Pero paano? Kung bawat sulok ng bar na ito'y nagpapaalala sa akin kung sino talaga ako? But the hell I care! Gusto ko lang uminom. And maybe... maybe, makakalimutan ko rin ang sarili kong pagkatao kapag pinuno na ng alak ang buo kong sistema.

The lights were dim, the music a low thrum against my chest. The crowd was a blur of laughter and flirtatious glances—but I was lost in my own head, replaying the argument with Dad over and over like a broken record. Two years. That was the deal.

Dalawang taon akong magpapanggap na gusto ko ang isang bagay na hindi ko kailanman pinangarap. Dalawang taon kong ipipilit sa sarili ko na pumasok sa isang mundong hindi ko nararamdaman na akin. Could I do that? Would I survive it without losing who I really was? I sipped my drink. It tasted like regret.

“Bad night?” a voice asked — smooth and teasing, slicing clean through the fog in my head.

I didn’t answer right away. Just turned my head slightly. She was tall. Pretty and confident. Hair pulled back, sharp collarbones that's been overly displayed. Her lipstick matched the red of the neon light that flickered overhead. Loren. How could I forget?

“You’re Gavin, right?” she asked, eyes narrowing just a little, like she already knew the answer.

“No,” I said flatly.

She gave a short laugh, not offended. “Come on. Loren? Gael's cousin? Aquamarine?" she's talking about the resort na pag-aari nga cousin niya. Kung saan kami unang nagkakilala. Naaalala ko naman, yet I refused to respond.

I said nothing. Just motioned to the bartender for another round. But she didn’t leave. She took the seat beside me instead, like she belonged there.

“I remember you had shorter hair before," she said, a little smile tugging at her lips. "You looked different now. Bolder. Wilder, But I have to say, it suits you better. ”

Hindi parin ako kumibo.

“Didn’t think I’d run into you here,” she continued. “I heard you're settled in the States. How’d you doin’?”

“Not well,” I said. Then added, “Maybe… not yet.”

She tilted her head, tone softening. “So… what’s the story?”

“There’s nothing much to say, actually.” My voice came out dry. Guarded.

“Okay,” she said simply.

“I—I'm sorry. Just not in the mood.”

“Fair enough.” She leaned back in her seat, unfazed. “Just thought I’d say hi.”

Tahimik na sa pagitan namin pagkatapos. I didn’t ask her why she stayed. She didn’t ask me what I was running from. Loren held my gaze for a moment, tapos ngumiti siya. Mahinang ngiti—’yung klase na walang hinihinging kapalit. Saglit kaming nanatili ro’n. Walang imik. Hindi nagkatinginan. Letting the glasses between us do the talking. Then she turned her head. Across the bar, a group of people were waving at her—friends, clearly.

“I should go,” she said, sliding off the stool. “They’ll give me hell if I don’t say hi.”

I didn’t respond. She didn’t wait for one either.

“Take care, Gavin,” she said gently, like a thread pulling loose.

I nodded once. No smile. No goodbye.

Marami pang lumapit at kumausap sa akin, pero gaya ng naging tugon ko sa kanya. Tama na ang isang ngiti, isang tango at isang simpleng sagot. I didn't engaged with deeper conversation.

My gaze drifted again — or maybe it was the tequila that had more to say than I did. I saw blurred images of bodies moving, dancing, losing themselves to the rhythm. Again familiar faces flickered past, their smiles glowing under the twinkling lights.

The energy in the room pulsed like a second heartbeat, tugging at something buried deep inside me — a sense of freedom I thought I’d lost. It called to me. Urged me to join them. To forget.

Yet, I stayed still... content with watching alone. Hanggang sa may nahagip ang aking paningin.

Amidst the crazy crowds, there she stood and moved like she owned the night. Tahimik lang akong nakatingin habang gumigiling siya sa saliw ng tugtugin. Her movements were fluid and captivating at the same time. A dance that seemed to embody the very essence of joy and freedom. The kind that doesn't give a damn! She danced like she didn’t care who was watching — like the night was hers to conquer. Long dark hair, loose curls that caught the strobe lights like fire. A tight dress that hugged her like confidence itself. Her eyes, dark brown and burning, met mine — just for a moment — and I forgot how to blink. I felt an inexplicable pull towards her, as if the rhythm of the music was weaving an invisible thread between us, drawing me closer to her vibrant energy.

There was something in her... something raw, magnetic. A fire. An unspoken dare. As if she was about to cast a spell and I was already under it. I couldn’t look away. I didn’t want to. The music surged, the crowd faded, and all I saw was her — dancing like the world didn’t exist. And suddenly, nothing else did.

I watched as she brushed off the third guy who tried to dance with her. She dismissed him with a small shake of her head and a casual flick of her hand—calm, composed, commanding. She knew how to draw lines. She knew how to own her space.

But not everyone respected that.

As the music pulsed, I caught the looks from others. Some were intrigued by her confidence. Others? Not so much. I knew that look—disdain masked as judgment, the kind that lingers in places where power is currency and women like her refuse to fold.

And then I saw him—the guy she accidentally stepped on earlier. He wasn’t letting it go. His expression shifted—annoyance turned entitlement. I followed his gaze and saw her heading off the dance floor, disappearing into the dim corridor that led to the restrooms.

And just like that. He followed her.

My jaw clenched. Damn it. Something inside me stirred—instinct, maybe. Or something more dangerous. I slid off my stool, ready to follow. Pero saglit lang. I stopped myself. That kind of confrontation? It never ends well in a place like this. Instead, I walked straight to the nearest bouncer, leaned in, and calmly explained what I’d seen.

“There’s a guy who just followed a girl into the back corridor. She was clearly avoiding him. Ayoko ng gulo, but I think you should check on her. Now.”

He gave me a quick nod, already alert. I slipped a few crisp one-thousand-peso bills into his pocket and added, “Make sure she’s safe. That’s all I ask.”

His expression shifted. “Copy, boss. Ako na bahala.” I gave him a small nod then quietly made a return to where I left of.

I swirled the drink in my hand. Habang nakaupo ako, sa gitna ng ingay, ng mga usapan at tawa, ay hindi mawala-wala saisipan ko ang babae kanina. I couldn’t off shake the feeling of wanting her. But this is not the right time to get myself involved in someone.

I glanced around. Lahat ng tao sa paligid ay parang may gustong patunayan. Suot ang mamahaling damit, may bitbit na mamahaling alak. Flaunting their wealth in any possible form. Every damn corners of this room, reminds me of who I am, when all I ever wanted is to forget that I am an heir, na may responsibilidad ako na kailangang gampanan. I just want to be me, walang label, walang pangalan. Kahit ngayong gabi lang.

So, I stood up, placed a generous tip on the counter, and gave a quick nod to the bartender. “Thanks,” I said, almost in a whisper. Hindi na niya kailangang sumagot.

Lumingon ako bago tuluyang umalis. A part of me really wanted to stay. To maybe catch a glimpse of her again. The girl on the dance floor—the one who moved like the world didn’t matter. She had presence. Yung tipong hindi mo lang basta makakalimutan.

But I’ve seen this kind of fire before. And I’ve been burned enough times to know what comes after. She looks like trouble.

Not the petty kind.The kind that lingers. And honestly? I’m not in the mood to entertain chaos tonight. Not now. Not in the days to come.

So I turned around and walked—this time, away from the noise, from the music, from her. I didn’t even look back.

Paglabas ko, sinalubong ako ng malamig na hangin. Mas totoo pa 'yon kaysa sa lahat ng nangyari sa loob. I lit a cigarette. First stick ko ulit in weeks. I don’t even smoke regularly—minsan lang kapag kailangan kong mag-isip, o kapag hindi ako maka-disconnect. I stared at the neon sign of the bar above me. Beautiful font. Nice lighting. But it wasn’t for me.

“Nope,” I muttered under my breath. “Not tonight.”

I pulled out my phone and searched: “chill bars near me.” Yung hindi ako kailangang magsalita kung ayoko. Yung pwede lang akong umupo at uminom. Yung may real music, not a playlist made to impress.

I flicked the cigarette, got into my car, and started the engine. Time to find a place that doesn’t ask me to be someone I do not want to be.

Tonight, I just needed space. And maybe, just maybe—something real.