Somewhere Between Time

Time Stop 19

"Mamumukhaan ka ng mga tao," nag-aalalang sabi niya dito.

"I don't care," sagot nito. "Where can we go?"

Umiling siya dahil wala din siyang idea. Nagulat pa siya ng umupo ito sa gutter ng kalsada. "Sit here," tinapik nito ang espasyo sa tabi. Umupo naman siya at tumingin sa kabilang kalsada. "Speak."

"What exactly do you want me to say?" She asked Ivan, not glancing at the man who was staring at her. She feigned not to understand what he was saying.

"You know her.....Louise," he didn't ask her. He stated it. "She's the best friend in your story." She didn't utter a word. "She's Mason's ex."

Unconsciously, Cameron bites her lower lip. He's going to open her wound again.

"F*ck!" she looked up at him when he cursed. "I should have known when you told me her name."

"Pero marami namang Louise sa mundo," sabi niya dito.

"I know that but when you mentioned Mason's name, I should have connected the dots! Damn stupid!" patuloy pa din ito sa pagmumura. "She's a great woman, Cameron. Yung babaeng sinaktan nyo ni Mason......she doesn't deserve that. I know her since we were little. Alam ko ang ugali nun." Hindi siya nagsalita. Hinayaan niyang magkwento ito. "Miss Goody Two Shoes....The princess of Villaluz herd........" inis na inihilamos nito ang dalawang kamay sa mukha. Tingin niya ay gusto nitong sumigaw. "She is my Princess, Cameron. She is my fiancee!"

Her jaw dropped when she heard it! So it is Louise whom Ivan is going to marry!

She became more uneasy about what he learned. Of all people pa talaga! Sa dami nang tao sa mundo, si Ivan pa ang nakilala niya!

"Now I am torn! Torn between the two of you! F*ck! F*ck! F*ck!" hindi niya alam kung para kanino ito nagagalit. Ngayon lang niya nakitang nagmumura ito nang tila walang pakialam!

Napapatingin sa binata ang mga taong nagdaraan at nag-aalala siya na baka mamukhaan ang kaibigan niya. Nais niya tuloy na hilahin ito papasok ng bahay.

"I'm sorry," mahinang sabi niya dito. "I am sorry for hurting her."

"You should be," narinig muli niya ang mahinang pagmumura nito. "At kung nasa harap ko ngayon si Mason, baka napatay ko siya sa ginawa niya sa inyong dalawa! He hurt a great woman and then screwed you!"

Ivan clenched his fists. She can see clearly the anger pulsed through his veins. The molten anger filling the guy beside her is scaring her. Scared that he might hurt her. She hugged her knees, seeking comfort. Hoping that Ivan will calm down.

She can hear his deep breathing as if he came from running a hundred miles, controlling his rage.

Nagulat siya nang bigla siya nitong yakapin at halikan sa ulo. "I am sorry......." muli siyang hinalikan nito doon. Bumuntong hininga ito pero hindi inaalis ang pagkakayakap sa kanya. Instead, he rested his chin on her head. "I didn't mean to frighten you. Nagagalit ako sa mga nangyari......sa sitwasyon dahil kilala ko si Louise. She's the most generous, loving, kindest person that I met. Sabi ko nga sa iyo, kilala ko siya noon pa man kaya alam ko ang ugali nyan. Siya ang tipo ng kahit galit na galit na, pipiliin pa din niya ang tamang salita para hindi ka masaktan. I just cannot imagine the pain she'd been through."

Humiwalay siya dito at muling niyakap ang mga tuhod. "Small world, isn't it? It seems like destiny is in her mood to play. She's pulling us all together."

"Yeah," napabuga ito ng hangin. "Destiny has been cruel to you." Naramdaman niya ang pamamasa ng mata. "Minsan talaga, kung sino pa yung mga iniiwasan mo, you will meet people who are close to them." Humarap ito sa kanya ngunit hindi siya kumilos mula sa pagkakayakap sa mga tuhod. "Remember when I told you to drop the part of your best friend and focus on the story between you and Mason?" tumango siya. "Now I want us to talk about her."

She kept quiet for few minutes, looking for her courage to kick in because until now, Louise is a sensitive story of her life.

When she finally gathered herself, she swallowed and started...

"We were okay when I left," tumingin siya dito at nakita niya ang pagkuot nito ng noo. "She forgave me and moved on from the situation. I saw how happy she is with her new boyfriend who happened to be in the same group that we have." Hindi kumibo si Ivan at tahimik na inantay ang iba pa niyang sasabihin. "I thought I will be happy because of that but my insecurities filled me. Nasa akin si Mason pero dahil alam kong mahal pa niya si Louise, part of me is still cursing her. Anong meron siya na wala ako? Mayaman naman ako, matalino, maganda pero bakit hindi ko makuha ng lubos ang atensyon niya?" Idinampi niya ang tela ng suot na tshirt sa gilid ng mata niya nang maramdaman ang nag-babadyang pagbagsak ng luha. "I know it is not her fault for having Mason's heart but I have to look for someone to blame and Louise is an easy target." Napatawa siya nang pagak. "I am convincing myself that if not for Louise, maybe I am the one that Mason loves...na hindi ko na sana nagawa ang mga bagay na ginawa ko kung hindi siya dumating sa buhay namin. Ako na nga ang nanira ng relasyon, ako pa ang galit at malakas ang loob na manisi ng taong walang ginagawang mali sa akin." She pressed her eyes with her thumb and pointing finger. "I thought I moved on when I left the country but...."

"You saw them again......happy together with your children and it all came back to you. You don't want to blame her, you don't want to curse her but you are doing that. When you saw them, you want to hurt them physically." Inunahan na siya nito sa anumang sasabihin niya.

Doon na tumulo ang luha niya. Ayaw man niyang aminin sa sarili pero iyon ang naramdaman niya noong mga oras na iyon. Gusto niyang saktan ang dalawa, lalo na si Louise dahil nagsinungaling ito sa kanya. Sinabi nitong ayaw na kay Alex pero isiniksik pa din nito ang sarili sa dating nobyo to the point na kailangang akuin nito ang responsibilidad para maging ina ng mga anak niya.

"You hate her," hindi siya kumibo pero patuloy pa rin ang pag-agos ng luha niya. "You hate her." Hinawakan siya nito sa magkabilang balikat. "Tell me the truth, Cam."

She smiled bitterly and look straight into his eyes. "Yes. I do hate her as much as I hate Alex, as much as I hate myself! I hate him for not coming after me. I hate her for taking my part as a mother. I hate both of them for being happy. I hate myself for hating them!" And she burst into tears.

Bumuga nang hangin ang binata bago siya niyakap nang mahigpit. "Hush, Cam....." Hinagod nito ang likod niya bilang pag-alo.

"I hate being myself, Ivan. It's been years and I thought I already moved on. I thought everything will be alright. I thought being busy will help me forget or will make me strong.....but I am wrong." The wound which she thought was already healed is still as fresh as it was yesterday. "Please......I want to forget all the pain....." She felt the pain in her chest so she clenched her fist on top of it. "Help me, Ivan.......Don't leave me."

He kissed her forehead. "I am here for you, Cam. I will not leave your side. I will help you get through all the pain." He breaks the hug and lifted her face, cupping it with both of his hands then wiped her tears away. "Hindi mo kailangang kalimutan ang mga sakit na naranasan mo. It will help you to become strong, Cameron. Just believe in yourself. And please...stop crying, will you? Baka bugbugin ako ng mga tatay natin kapag pumasok ka sa loob na ganyan ang itsura. Baka akalain, pinaiyak kita."

"I cannot breathe...I have to blow," sabi niya dito. Parang napuno na ang ilong niya ng sipon. "I need a tissue."

"Take this," iniabot nito ang panyo na mula sa bulsa. "Sneeze then I will buy us some coffee. Kailangang mahimasmasan ka bago tayo bumalik sa loob. Nakakahiya sa parents mo."

Hindi niya maiwasang hindi matawa. "Kasalanan mo kasi. Pinaiyak mo ako."

"Malay ko bang may ganyan ka pa ding kabigat na issue kay Lou hanggang ngayon? And I didn't know that you will cry like that! Para kang batang ewan!" nakaingos man ito ay nakangiti. "Women! Ang dami nyong drama sa buhay!"

"Malalandi kasi kayong mga lalaki!" pang-aasar nya dito.

"Walang malanding lalaki kung walang lumalanding babae!" imbes na ma-offend siya ay humagalpak siya ng tawa. "Oh natawa ka sa kalokohan mo?"

Tinampal niya ng malakas ang braso nito. "Oo na, malandi na! Wag mo nang isampal sa mukha ko."

"Sabi ko naman sa iyo, kailangan natin yan paminsan minsan para nagigising sa katotohanan." Nang tumayo ito ay sumunod siya. "That stupid self-pity s***h hate that you have in you, we will totally remove that in your system." Inakbayan siya nito. "Leave it to me."

"And what will you do? Baka imbes na umayos ako, lalong maging baliko ang utak ko." Kunwa ay may halong pagdududa na sabi niya dito. Pero ang totoo, natutuwa siya at may kaibigan siyang Ivan. Isang lalaking baliw pero napaka-straight forward na aalog sa buong pagkatao mo lalo na kapag naliligaw ng landas ang utak mo.

"Hindi ko pa alam," napakunot ang noo niya. "I have to find ways on how to deal with your bipolar self. If you just saw how you cried earlier, and now you're laughing, there's really something wrong in you." He laughed.

"Sira ka talaga! Ikaw kaya ang bipolar madalas! Tska kung makapag-offer ka......"

"Hah!" Iniliyad nito ang dibdib. "Kapag ikaw, naka move on nang tuluyan, baka sa hindi ka na makawala sa akin. Baka hindi mo na naising balikan pa si Mason."

"Kung may babalikan man ako, mga anak ko lang," sagot niya. "At bakit naman hindi na ako makakawala sa iyo, aber?"

"Because you will fall in love with me, Cameron Marie so keep your heart close to you. Wag mong masyadong ilapit sa akin para di ka ma-fall." Ngumisi ito.

"I will not fall to a guy who is connected with Louise, not for the second time around, please!" She rolled her eyes as they burst into laughter.