Bleeding Heart still Pounds

Ice Skating

"It was already christmas eve! Come on kids! Let's eat!"

Tumayo ako nang marinig ang boses ni Papa sa pinto ng kwarto namin ni Ate. It was exactly 24th day of December so we will celebrate the christmas eve as a one whole happy family.

Kachat ko lang si Aldwin kanina. He said that he will also celebrate the christmas eve with his family. I don't know if he and Aldous were in good terms now but I hope that they were ok. Pasko na bukas kaya sana ay magbati na sila.

My Mom had finished cooking for the noche buena. There were so many dishes that was serve in the dining table. It was like there was a feast.

I quickly sat on the dining chair. I wait for my Mom to get me some rice and afritada. On the other hand, Ate Maxine wasn't excited. She looks like she was carrying all of the problems of the people in the whole world.

"Kamusta school Maxine?" my Mom asked.

Inilapag ni Ate ang kubyertos nya. He slightly looked up to met my Mom's eyes.

"Good." Ate seems like she doesn't want to talk about it.

I swallowed the lump on my throat when Dad glanced at me. Alam kong ako naman ang tatanungin nya ng parehas ng tinanong nya kay Ate pero iba ang tanong na ibinato nya sa'kin.

"Kamusta naman kayo ni Aldwin?" I'm a bit surprised with the mention of Aldwin's name.

I thought, Dad will asked about my studies but he asked my relationship with Aldwin.

"Actually, sinagot ko na po sya noong kaarawan nya." I honestly confessed. There's no point of lying because Dad will know it soon.

Mom and Dad wasn't surprise at all. I think, they really expected it. Kumain na lang kami at hindi na nagkwentuhan pang muli. After that, I really didn't expect that Mom and Dad will give me a gift. Dalawang gift ang natanggap ko from them. Ganoon din naman si Ate. Ako naman ay may regalo din sa kanila. A white sneakers for my Mom and a branded shirt for my Dad. Pinag-ipunan ko talaga iyon.

Speaking of gifts, bigla ko tuloy naalala 'yung dalawang gifts na ibinigay sa'kin ni Aldwin noong christmas party. Because of excitement, I quickly went on my room after eating noche buena with my family.

"Oh my God! It's Louis Vitton Bag!!!" I shouted because of excitement. I quickly opened the paper bag that Aldwin bought for me. Before that, I saw a card attached on it so I read it.

Magugustuhan mo ang regalo ko sa'yo. Merry christmas babe. I love you. A lot!

I can't help but to smile. Nakalimutan ko na ngang silipin 'yung laman ng paper bag. Mabuti na lang at naalala ko ulit.

"Oh my God! Ang ganda!" I exclaimed while taking out the necklace from the box.

Ang ganda ng necklace. Pang-doctor 'yung kwintas na iyon. Actually, iyon 'yung necklace ni Clyden Ramirez sa University Series. Stethoscope 'yung pendant nya.

Medyo naluluha tuloy ako sa sobrang tuwa. I was really touched at this point. I never thought that Aldwin saved up his money to buy me this necklace.

I was about to call Aldwin but someone was calling me in messenger. Si Eron ang tumatawag, sa gc namin iyon. Ngayon ko lang nalaman na may gc na kami ng mga kaibigan ni Aldwin at kaibigan ko. Syempre, in-add ko si Jake. Hindi pwedeng hindi sya belong sa squad.

[Merry christmas!!!!] everyone greeted in chorus. Lahat ng kaibigan ko at ni Aldwin ay present dito sa video call na ito.

We started talking about some nonsense things. Parang siraulo talaga ang mga kaibigan ni Aldwin lalong-lalo na si Justin.

[Buti pa kayo, ang gaganda ng mga natanggap nyo samantalang ako, pucha... mug ang natanggap ko! Tasa!] Justin reaction was so funny. He was pissed and sobrang nalugi ang reaksyon ng mukha nya.

[Ayos lang 'yan p're. Mahilig ka namang magkape.] Ren teased him.

They continue teasing each other. May shiniship pa silang loveteam. Eron and Yeye, Angel and Justin, Ren and Jobelle. Samantalang ang iba ay wala lang pakialam. Palibhasa ay may mga bebe na sila.

Finally, the video call ended. Hindi naman sa naiinip ako pero gusto ko nang makausap si Aldwin. I mean, 'yung kaming dalawa lang. I don't want other people to interrupt or ruin my moment with Aldwin. I want to spend more time with him.

As I was expected, Aldwin was calling me on messenger. Because of excitement, I pressed the call button. I get my earphones on the side table so that I wouldn't wake Ate Maxine up. She was already sleeping na kasi.

"Hoy!" I greeted. I was trying to hide a smile but I fail when I saw that there was nothing on top of him. He was totally topless.

[Nagustuhan mo 'yung christmas gift ko sa'yo?] he asked in a low voice maybe because he doesn't want to wake his Kuya Aldous up.

"Of course naman. Nagustuhan ko 'yung necklace kasi stethoscope 'yung design e. Remember, doctor ang dream profession ko!" I said just incase he forgot what is the career that I want to pursue in the future.

[Mabuti naman at nagustuhan mo.] he exhaled as a sign of relief. He was also smiling.

"Oh, naalala ko nga pala. 'Yung Louis Vitton Bag..." I paused for a second, thinking how will I explained it without offending him.

[What about it?] he yawn. I knew that he wants to sleep but he managed to stay awake for us to talk to each other.

"Ang mahal noong bag na 'yon. Sana binilhan mo na lang ang sarili mo ng sapatos o di kaya naman ay inipon mo na lang 'yung pera." nanghihinayang ang tono ng pananalita ko.

Aldwin massage his head like I was causing him a real headache.

[Ang pera ko ay walang kwenta kung hindi naman kita mapapasaya.]

And just like that, I smiled like an idiot and crazy woman. Aldwin was really best in making my heart fluttered. His sugar coated words make me feel like I am riding on a cloud. Para akong nakasakay sa ulap na may mga unicorns na nasa paligid ko.

In the middle of our conversation, Aldwin was yawning. I bet that he wants to sleep. Alas dose y media na rin kasi ng gabi. Christmas na. Aldwin and I greet each other. Actually, nagreet na namin ng merry christmas ang isa't isa in advance.

"Babe, tulog ka na." ako na ang nagkusa na sabihin iyon sa kanya. I thought, he will obey me like I am his master but he was so stubborn. Pinilit ko pa sya na matulog na pero sadyang napakatigas ng ulo nya.

[Oo, hinihikab nga ako pero marinig ko lang boses mo, nawawala agad antok ko.] I saw him winking on the screen. This guy, really! He knows how to find my weakness! Pasalamat sya't nadadaan nya ako sa pakindat-kindat nya.

Dahil nga sa mapilit sya, edi 'yon, naglate night talk kami. We talk about how did they celebrate the christmas eve. Just like us, kumain lang daw sila ng noche buena kasama ang pamilya nya. I also asked if he and Aldous were in good terms now and he said yes. Thank God, they came back as being brothers and not enemies. Aldwin tear up with the mention of her mother's name. Iniba ko tuloy ang topic para hindi na sya umiyak. I told him how did me and my family celebrate the christmas eve.

The next morning, exactly christmas day when the house filled with so much noise. Nagising tuloy ako ng maaga. I went downstairs when I saw my cousin playing with the car toys. As I was expected, my Tito and Tita's were here. We were all complete. Even my grandmother and grandfather were also here.

"Oh, eto na ba si Ashley?" tita Lia asked when I saw her in the living room.

"Oo sis. Anak ko 'yan. Ganda 'no? Mana 'yan sa'kin." ny mother proudly said.

Lahat ng Tita ko ay ngumiti kaya ngumiti rin ako pabalik. Aalis na sana ako pero pinigilan ako ng mga Tita ko. They were now asking questions to me just like I expected. Panay oo at hindi lang naman ang isinasagot ko not until they asked me the name of my boyfriend. Wait, how did they know? Did Thrixie tell them? Sya lang naman ang may alam well except kay Ate. But anyways, I had no choice but to tell the truth to them. Nang masabi ko ang pangalan ni Aldwin ay saka pa lang ako nakaalis sa mga mata nila. It feels so good because I knew that I did not lie.

Nakasalubong ko si Ate na pababa pa lang. Ako naman ay paakyat na sa kwarto ko. I logged in on my messenger account, hoping that Aldwin was online but he wasn't. Maybe, he was also spending the christmas with his family? When kaya makakapagcelebrate ng pasko kasama sya? When we're married? When we already have a kids?

I was about to logged off in my account but Jake was calling me.

[Maligayang christmas, payatot!] he insulted.

I blowed my cheeks, indicating that I was really pissed. This guy was really annoying!

"Merry christmas din, walis tingting." I also insult him. We were both malnourished so I used to call him walis tingting.

[Nasa'n christmas gift ko payatot?] he made a gesture like he was expecting that I have a gift for him.

"Wala. Hindi uso sa'kin ang magbigay ng regalo sa'yo." I rolled my eyes to maintain my sassy attitude.

[Ang sama mo sa'kin Ashley Janed!] he said while wearing a sulk expression in his face. This was the reason why I laughed at him.

After our little conversation, I went downstairs to greet my cousins. I just told Jake na ipapa-LBC ko na lang 'yung gift ko sa kanya na personalized coin purse at handkerchief.

When I went on the living room, I saw everybody eating what's serve on the dining table. As usual, there were so many side dishes that my Mom purposely cooked. Everyone was busy chitchatting except from Ate Maxine who was just watching netflix. On the other hand, my younger cousins were playing different toys. I carried them on my lap. Thrixie also did the same thing.

The next thing happened, I received a pamasko from each of my Tito and Tita. So ang dami ko ng money, yehey!

While we were eating, my tito and tita always reminded me that I should at least achieve my dream before getting married. They weren't against in my relationship with Aldwin. My parents weren't strict. They allowing me to make a relationship with someone as long as it will not affect my grades and studies.

The christmas day went very well. Maraming mga bata ang nangangaroling. Ang ilan naman ay namamasko. This day passed without Aldwin calling me. I haven't heard any news from him. But I was pretty sure that he celebrate this special day with his family.

28th, 29th and 30th day of December passed so quickly. In that particular days, Aldwin did not even calling or messaging me. Some of my tita left our house while some stayed to celebrate the new year with us. Of course, my grandmother and grandfather stayed with us.

My Mom cooked different dishes again. There were so many desserts that she purposely made. Ate Maxine help Mom to decorate the house. I can seen round objects all over the house. Pampaswerte raw kasi 'yon.

Everyone was so busy except from me. After taking a bath, I stayed in my room to wait for my boyfriend's calls or messages. I was just wearing a pink v-neck checkered long sleeve dress. My outfit was so pretty but my mood wasn't. I also heard some fireworks from my neighbors. I went out of my room when I realized that I still have five minutes before the new year. Ngayon ko lang namalayan na ilang minuto na lang ang nalalabi bago sumapit ang alas dose. I bring my phone with me just in case Aldwin call me. I did not assume anything. I'm just hoping that we will count the remaining minutes together.

Nagkacount-down na ang buong pamilya ko kaya nakibilang na rin ako. It was exactly 11:59 A.M. when I felt my phone vibrated. My heart jump out of excitement when Aldwin's name showed on my screen.

[10!] he said on the other line. With that, I can easily tell that he was counting down for the new year.

"9." I follow his lead. We count alternately.

"3... 2... 1..." we both counted. Both of us were joyous and delighted.

"Happy New Year babe!" he greet me first. Naunahan nya ako ron a!

Gusto ko sanang awayin sya dahil sa hindi nya pagtawag sa'kin ng ilang araw. Pero naisip ko naman na makawiran ang dahilan nya at saka ayokong sirain ang magandang pagkakataon na ito.

"Happy New Year din babe." I greet back, wearing the most beautiful smile that a woman can wear.

My family started to create ear splitting sound. May nagtotorotot at nagpapandar ng motor. I went back to my room when I realized how loud my family was. I wasn't able to hear what Aldwin was saying if I continue to stay there.

"Ano ulit 'yon?" I wasn't able to hear him.

[Ang sabi ko, mahal kita ng sobra sobra.] he said which makes my heart jumped out of my chest.

Sa sumunod na mga araw ay mas lalong naging sweet sa'kin si Aldwin. He was so gentle towards me. He was so sweet as ever. Nang magbalik-eskwela ay mas lalo akong nanibago sa personalidad ni Aldwin.

Siya na ang nagsusulat ng lectures ko. Inililibre nya rin ako ng pamasahe pauwi. Araw-araw din ay nag-iiwan sya ng isang rose sa desk ko. Pakiramdam ko tuloy ay araw na ng mga puso ngayon.

Mabilis lang din na lumipas ang mga araw. In that particular days, both of us were concentrating in our studies. Patapos na rin kasi ang buwan ng Enero. Malapit ng magbigayan ng card.

My classmates, on the other hand was just chilling lalong lalo na si Jake. Nakikipagdaldalan pa sya sa mga babae sa halip na mag-aral ngayong vacant. Ang mga nakakakwentuhan naman nya na sina Kate, Joyce Ann, Van, Mimi, Yeye at Irish ay tumawa na ng tumawa. Buti pa sila, pa easy easy lang.

"Turuan kita sa Math." inunahan na ako ni Aldwin. Mabilis na tinukso kami ng mga kaibigan nya. Syempre, si Justin ay nagtatampo dahil sya raw ang unang nagpaturo pero ako ang inuna ng kaibigan nya.

Nagpeace sign na lang ako para somehow, gumaan 'yung loob nya.

Ganoon ang naging set-up namin ni Aldwin. Tinuturuan nya ako sa Math kahit hindi ko sabihin. Ewan ko ba, sinisikap ko naman na matutunan 'yung lesson na 'yon pero wala ni isa ang naintindihan ko. Matatapos na naman yata ang taon na ito na bobo ako sa Math. Poor me.

Before January ends, nalaman ko na nga ang grades ko this third quarter. Thanks to Aldwin, I got 91 in Mathematics. Okay na rin iyon kaysa mag-aim ako ng grado na mas malaki pa sa 91. Maging kontento na lang ako, di'ba? I-appreciate ko na lang 'yung blessings na natanggap ko. At saka, with honors naman ako this quarter. Another achievement na naman 'yon. Sayang nga lang at hindi ako nasama sa rankings pero ayos na rin 'yon. At least, naging honors ako, di'ba?

"Naks naman. Rank 3! Sana all!" Hindi kakikitaan ng inggit ang pananalita ni Eron. In fact, he was so proud to Aldwin.

Yes, tama kayo! Aldwin ranked number 3 in our class. His total average was 95. Talino ng boyfriend ko, di'ba? Sana all na lang kayo.

"Congrats babe." I tip toed to gave him a quick kiss in his cheeks. Gaya ng inaasahan, nag sana all na naman ang mga kaibigan ko at kaibigan nya. A smile slowly worked on Aldwin's face. He was staring at me like he wanted me to repeat my previous action.

"Congrats p're. Ang galing mo pero mas magaling pa rin ako kasi rank 3 ka samantalang rank 2 naman ako." Jake arrogantly said.

"Wala namang nagtanong." pambabara ni Aldwin na syang naging dahilan kung bakit natawa ang lahat.

Ngumuso si Jake, luminga-linga sya sa paligid upang maghanap ng kakampi. Pero kamalas-malasan, walang pumapanig sa kanya.

"Ang sama ng ugali mo Aldwin. Bakit ka nga ba nagustuhan ni Ashley Janed?" pagkausap nito sa sarili.

"Kasi gwapo ako." nagyabang na rin si Aldwin. Jusko po!

"Di naman kita tinatanong." at si Jake naman ngayon ang nambabara kay Aldwin. Nabaliktad lang talaga ang sitwasyon.

"Tama na nga. Para kayong mga isip bata." I cut them off.

"Ang mabuti pa... since tapos na naman ang exams and alam na natin ang grades natin, bakit hindi tayo magcelebrate or hang out rather?" Angel asked everyone.

Nagkatinginan ang lahat before we could answer 'G'!

"Great! Then, where do we go now? How do mall sounds?" Yeye seems so excited.

"A mall sounds good! Let's go now!"

And that's what happened next. We eat in jollibee. Naghati-hati kami sa one bucket ng chicken joy para mas tipid. After we eat, we then part ways. Ang iba ay nasa tom's world, ang iba naman ay nasa wattsons para bumili ng mga cosmetics. The others were just window shopping. Ang iba naman ay nagsususuot na kung saan. Hay, bahala na nga sila. Malalaki na sila. Kaya na nila sarili nila.

Aldwin and I held each other hands. He asked me if I want to watch cinema so I shook my head as an answer. Ayoko naman na gumastos na naman sya para lang sa panonood ng sine. Actually, I like to watch cinema with him but he will not allowed me to share the bills with him. Kahit popcorn ay hindi nya ako hahayaan na magbayad kaya 'wag na lang manood ng sine. Mauubos lang pera nya.

We end up ice skating. Good thing, we weren't wearing our uniform. We were now wearing a casual clothes such as pants, t-shirt and a sneakers. The bad thing is... Aldwin pay for it again. He did not even give me a chance to pay mine. Ang mahal pa naman mag ice skating dito sa mall! Napakagastador nya!

"Ako na." he insisted na sya na ang magsusuot ng sapatos ko na may gulong. I don't know kung ano ang tawag doon dahil first time ko pa lang naman mag ice skating. I did not even know kung paano mag skating.

Inihakbang ko ang kaliwa kong paa nang makatapak ako sa nagyeyelo at madulas na sahig. I screamed when I fell over because I lose my balance. Aldwin immediately ice skate towards me to help me get up.

I just stared at his hand that he had been offered to me. Ice skating was so frightening. I can injured my knees or some parts of my body.

"Bakit?" Aldwin's brow furrowed.

A moment of silence passed. Ayoko namang sabihin na huwag na kaming mag ice skate dahil sayang ang perang ibinayad nya.

"Ayoko ng mag ice skating. Nakakatakot..." I uttered those words finally.

Inilibot ni Aldwin ang tingin sa paligid. He was trying to make me understand that all people surrounds us were also scared of ice skating. Pero kahit na ipaintindi nya iyon, hindi pa rin nawawala ang takot ko.

"Hinding hindi kita pababayaan kaya't hindi mo kailangang matakot na sumubok ng ibang bagay."

I do not know why I accept his hand. For the first time, there is a guy who removed my fear away. He intertwined my hands to him. He was talking to me using his eyes. His eyes were telling me that there's no reason to be afraid of.

"Kahit anong mangyari, palagi akong nasa tabi mo. Sa lahat ng bagay, ako ang bahala sa'yo." he gave me an assuring smile.

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