Inaudible Melodies

Kabanata 15

"Sabagay, tama ka naman pero ang swerte ng bruhang si Katrisha, 'no? Hindi ko nga alam kung paano niya nakuha ang gano'n ka hot at papable na pinsan mo. P'wede kayang makahingi ng tips sa kanya?" Humalakhak siya sa huling sinabi.

I can't keep up with her laugh because I lost track of her statement that made my stomach twitch. There's a part of me that hurts to think that he already belongs to someone else.

Freaking cake! Those irrational thoughts that wrecked my conscious thinking! I can't find the precise words to describe my emotions. I even wonder if there's an exact meant for this matter.

Her laugh died. Confused, she glanced at me.

"Is there something wrong?"

Pilit akong ngumiti, trying to hide my darkest thoughts that stimulated a disturbance to my system.

"No. I just don't like bringing that kind of topic especially if he's involved with it."

There's no alliance between my mind and heart at this moment. That's a fact because what I've said to her was a mere lie.

"Sorry, Lea. Hindi ba kayo magkasundo ng pinsan mo?"

Are we really getting along? To recall it, he always likes tricking me. Playing with my innocence, deceived me, and outwitted me at some point.

My cousin lives to enjoy mocking me. Well, the real answer was absolutely absurd to think that we're close. No. We're not.

Nah. Never.

I shrugged my shoulders. "Ewan ko. Hindi ko alam, Kacy. Sometimes... we're okay, but mostly, we're not."

"What do you mean?" she inquired once again, itching to fulfill her curiosity.

"Fine. We're okay but that doesn't mean that we're comfortable with each other's presence."

If only she knew how much Lucian's presence bothered me so much.

A hushed atmosphere wrapped around us after that, but it didn't last for long. We soon arrived at the mall. Kacy found a space to park her car in the parking lot.

I step out first and wait for her to finish. After a few minutes of fixing something inside, she got off too.

Sabay kaming naglakad papasok sa loob. My eyes prowled around in every stall. I've got here last time with my mother.

Hindi ko man aminin, may parte sa 'kin ang nangungulila sa kanya. It's not that bad to feel that, right? After all, she's still my mother.

"Saan tayo kakain?" tanong niya.

"Sa Dyhn restaurant na lang."

Habang naglalakad ay patingin-tingin ako sa mga store. In case that I might have something that can capture my attention to buy.

To my dismay, nakarating kami sa restaurant na walang nakakuha ng atens'yon ko.

After I comfortably sit on the stool, the waiter instantly came and gave us the menu.

I ordered milk tea with a small slice of cake. Kacy's eyes lifted and give me a scrutinizing stare. Kaagad siyang ngumuso sa 'kin nang mahuli ko siyang nakatitig.

"Hindi ako makapili. Mukhang masasarap lahat, eh!" she ranted like a child whining which made me chuckle a bit.

"Just pick what you think is the best."

"E masarap talaga lahat!" she even scratched her forehead while frustratingly staring at the menu.

"What should I do to you?" I emitted a deep sigh. She looks like she's about to cry!

I chewed my bottom lip to halt myself from laughing. However, I chose to hand back the menu to the waiter after I'm done ordering.

"Ikaw? What's your order?"

"Milktea and cake." I simply replied.

Her eyes widened in shock. "Diet ka, teh?!"

I'm maintaining my figure that's why. 'Cause if I got some weight, my mother will surely freak out about that. That's how hard to follow the rules of my mother that she built. I need to preserve my weight on point or else, a sole mistake will put me in the danger zone I don't wanna taste.

However, everything was out of grasp and I found myself hardly laughing at her words... that I shouldn't have done. Lahat ng tao sa restaurant ay napapatingin sa gawi namin.

Halos mamula ako sa mga tinging binabato nila. Freaking cake! Hindi ko naman alam na napalakas ang pagtawa ko!

My cheeks were flushing when I mumbled an apology for my reckless act. This is a disgrace! Freaking cake! That's a first!

Finally, she made her choice. The waiter left to pick up our order afterward.

Pinukol ko siya ng masamang tingin.

"What? What did I do?" inosente niyang saad.

"Ewan ko sa iyong babae ka!" I spitted while my eyes rolled at her.

"It's okay, Lea. You're actually cute while laughing earlier. It's like an angel sent from heaven to give peace using your laugh." a chuckle broke throughout her lips and wiggled her brows.

I glared at her, pretending that my eyeballs were about to fall off because of her statement.

"Stop sugar coating things. I embarrassed myself, okay? That's it."

This day will forever be engraved in my mind! Nakakahiya!

"Lea... do whatever makes you happy! Gosh. You might be called a fool for it, but at least you're a happy fool, not an empty, wise person."

I unbelievably looked at her.

"Is that you, Kacy?"

She rolled her eyes at me. "Kalma, ako lang 'to. Pero duh, anong tingin mo sa 'kin? Hindi marunong magseryoso?"

"Bakit? Kailan ka ba naging matino?" I winked at her to add spice to my mocking.

Our conversation halted when our order came. I almost dropped my jaw when I saw her crammed plate!

I gasped, not believing what I've seen. Are my eyes tricking me?

"C-can you eat all of those?!" hindi makapaniwalang sambit ko saka itinuro ang pang-pamilyang inorder niya. Ang d-dami!

Natutop ko ang aking bibig. She's a petite woman and I don't think she eats this much. But look at it now, the evidence was purely waving at me for a hi.

"What? I can finish all of these, Lea. Don't worry!"

I didn't notice earlier that she picked all the food on the menu because I'm too busy soothing myself to calm my shameful state.

Geez! She looks like she's starving to death!

"Kacy, you're not on a diet?" I dipped from my cup as I cast her a stare.

"Nope. I don't do diets. Ginagawa ko ang mga bagay na gusto ko dahil do'n ako sumasaya. I love making myself free, no inhibitions, go lang ng go, Lea."

Nakaramdam ako ng inggit dahil sa sinabi niya. Sana gano'n lang kadaling sabihin ang mga 'yon. Sana gano'n lang kadaling maabot ang tunay na gusto mong gawin.

To be free without someone contradicting and criticizing the things you want to do... is something I desire dearly.

"I wish I can be like you too..." I whispered.

Parang may sumakal sa puso ko sa mga oras na 'to. I hope it's easy to do everything that I want. That I'm only concerned about myself and not about others' perspectives.

I wanted to be selfish. God knows how much I wanted that.

Tinuon ko na lang ang aking atensyon sa cake. I lose my appetite for the thoughts I had in mind right now.

I played the cake through the fork I'm clasping when suddenly, there was a piece of music booming in each corner of the restaurant.

The moment I lifted my face, I almost choke from the cake I'm munching when I met Lucian's eyes. Those pair of hazel orbs that are staring back intently at me were a peculiar attractor that drives me into insanity.

When our eyes collided, it feels like my world had turned upside down. An unfamiliar feeling consumed my system that was raging wild because of the intensity his stares were howling.

Those stares meant something that I couldn't point out. Seemingly nameless, but I just felt it like how he wanted me to feel it though.

I'm not aware of this sense that nearly succumbs me. Almost but not quite drape me up in a meaningless keen that dragged me down to surrender that I fell flat to resist.

His pace became sluggish as he drew closer. Those orbs that didn't shatter our eye contact hooked me up in the bottomless pit of a chasm.

That there's no rope led down into the dark abyss to help me from ascending.

My breath was held captive when he tugged a chair next to me and comfortably settled himself.

I heard Kacy's faint gasps. Suddenly, my heart pounded so fast for an unknown reason.

"W-why are you here?" I finally found my voice to form a sentence yet I'm stuttering in front of him.

Lucian can do something to me that I couldn't avoid. His presence always dominates my whole system by a mere glance.

The hair on my nape stood up when our skin grazed with each other!

My palms moistened and I can imagine my sweats pouring down in my entire body!

Freaking cake! What did you do to me, Lucian?

"You? Why are you here?" ramdam ko ang kanyang mainit na hininga na tumatama sa pisngi ko. That's how close our distance was.

I gaze at Kacy's side, only to find out she's gaping at us. I winced at the sight of her. Her mouth was still well-off with food!

I motioned my hand to shut her mouth. Good thing she's not that dumb not to get it. She's humiliating herself as well as me.

"We're eating, can't you see?" annoyance was visible in my voice and his amused face doesn't bulge at all.

Great.

But why do I feel different towards Lucian after seeing him?

I feel like... I'm liki- don't go deep, Lea! Galit ka sa kanya, Lea. Dapat magalit ka! My subconscious mind interrupted

Holy mother of cupcakes! I almost step into the border of the danger zone! God. I need someone to bang my head on the wall! My unconscious thinking almost enter the restricted area!

I shouldn't think like that. It's not healthy for my emotions. It's bad.

And so Lucian.

I move my chair away from him. A sigh of relief fled from my mouth. It's good. I can breathe better.

"Ikaw, Lucian? Tell me the reason why you're here?" I asked with my eyes squinting.

"I'm here to watch you."

"What?"

I almost suffocate through it.

"I won't lose my eyes off you, Lea. You can't get away from me." his deep baritone tonality screams the final verdict.

That even saying no is not a choice.

Nanlalaki ang mga matang napatingin ako sa kanya. I'm slightly huffing for air because of his choice of words! Ramdam ko rin ang mabilis na pagpintig ng puso ko.

"I'm always watching you, Lea."

Oh, my freaking cake!

"A-ano?!" I stammered and my voice was knitted with nervousness.

"I'm watching you because I promise to your mother that I'll keep you safe. I'm your babysitter, remember?"

With that, the emotions that were stirringly surging inside me fell flat with a rapid twist.

His words. Why does it hurt so bad?