My Baby Boy

Recap "Tomorrow could you come home with me and meet my mom?" He asked with his bottom lip out. I smiled at him and nodded. "I'd love to." I whispered in his ear. I held his hand in mine and motioned him to the living room. Now that this is done we can go back home. "Riley and I are going now, see you guys whenever." I said waving at them. "Bye." They all said in unison. I turned to Riley and smiled. I had one mission objective. Get home and cuddle with Riley. I got in the drivers seat and started the car. A pain jolted through me as I felt heat coursing through my body. I had added another mission objective to my list. Save Riley. "Riley go!" I shouted. "Go to the door now!" I shouted. Riley looked at me confused then he realized it."I'm not going to leave you Axel!" He shouted. "It's okay, I'm fine just go to the door." I said. I wasn't going to move a muscle until he was at that door and he knew this. He ran to the door and I slipped out the car and just as I ran onto the lawn, the car exploded. "Axel!" I heard Riley shout. I couldn't see much, only his blue eyes. I wanted to say his name, I wanted to say it so badly, but I couldn't. Riley... ¿?¿?¿? Riley's P.O.V "Why won't they let you see him?" Lilly asked. I didn't look at her, I didn't want to. "I don't know." I answered after a long pause. "Riley don't you think that maybe..." She hesitated. "Maybe what?" I asked with edge. She sucked in a breath and wrote something in her notes. "That maybe there is no Axel for you to see." She said. I looked at her, ice in my eyes and no emotion on my face. "There is an Axel for me to see, one that's still breathing...even if there wasn't they'd still have no reason to not let me see him." I said the last part more for myself than for her. "Have you been taking your pills accordingly?" She asked. "Yes I have." I said, honesty laced in my tone. "Any suicidal thoughts recently?" She asked. "Not that I know of." I replied. "Tell me about your weekdays." She said. "You know how it is. I wake up, check my phone for anything from Axel, take a shower, brush my teeth, eat breakfast with Sammy, go to school, do my best, get home, do my homework, eat dinner with everyone, take a shower, try Axel's cell then go to bed." I said, leaving out the part of me cutting myself. She eyed me suspiciously then nodded after a while. "Your weekends?" She asked. "Spend them in my room crying alone and not talking to anyone and basically never leaving my room." I answered truthfully. She sighed and wrote a new note. "It seems we're out of time, you should try making friends at school." She said as she packed her stuff. "Okay." I said lowly. I walked her to the door and closed it as walked to her car. I watched as her car left my house. I ran upstairs and slammed my bedroom door shut once I got through it. I flopped onto my bed and burst into fits of tears and hiccups. !¡!¡!¡ I remember the day. The day it happened. The day that ruined me. The day that Axel died. I haven't seen him ever since then, they won't let me, they won't tell me why and it pisses me off. I miss Axel, all I want is him to be back with me. I want my boyfriend back. I've been going for therapy, but what does that do. Talking about Axel makes it worse, I don't like therapy. I'm on a bunch of pills now too. I take them accordingly, overdosing doesn't seem right. Every time I try do it something stops me, something in the back of my head. They told me he died, I refused to believe them, but with each passing day I feel like it's true. I want Axel back...I'm weak without Axel...I'm nothing. !¡!¡!¡ I heard a knock on my door and then heard it click open. "Riley someone's at the door for you." My mom said. I groaned into my pillow and ignored her. "Riley it's someone from school." My mom said and that's what got my attention. I sat up and whipped the sleep and tears from my eyes. I walked out my room and down the stairs with my shoulders slumped and my back hunched. I got to the door and opened it only to see one of my classmates. "Molly Sanders what a surprise." I said drily. She pulled me out and forced me out the way of my door. She slammed it shut and hugged me. I kept my arms at my sides, not giving in to the hug. 'Riley please speak to me.' She signed as she pulled away from me. 'No.' I signed back. My mom got a husband a few weeks ago who has a daughter, her name is Samantha Milo Torez. She's adorable and unfortunately deaf. She's four years old now and knows how to sign, write and walk. She makes me happy on bad days. I really like my new dad too, he's really nice and is okay with me being gay. He provides for us and now I'm going to school and the best part of it all is that I'm actually doing well. Molly is one of the many people who know my story and feel sorry for me and want to be my friend but I am very difficult. I do like Molly and the others, they're understanding and care for me. Everything this year is looking up for me, but what does it matter if Axel isn't here with me? 'Listen, the gang is going to the burger joint down town and we want you and Milo to come.' She signed. Everyone at school loves calling Samantha by her second name, Milo, because it's cute. I have a second name but no one calls me by it, because I won't tell it to them. But I guess since I don't know you I can say it. Ashley. There it is. My name is Riley Ashley Torez now. I have two new names and new problems. Yay.