Beautiful and Better (ENGLISH)

I examine the two individuals in front of me. Disgust and animosity. That's how I'm now feeling. I wanted to hurt them and make them feel the same way I do right now, but it wasn't enough. Every tear that rolled down their cheeks was insufficient to justify everything they'd done to me. I wanted them to be sorry for what they had done to me. I don't dare to have them feel the sorrow I'm going through right now. "I intended to inflict pain on both of you, but it wasn't possible. All of the anguish and pain I'm experiencing right now are insufficient to express how badly I'm hurting." I sobbed as I wiped away my tears. For both of them, forgiveness was unworthy, and they have no concept of regret for what they had done.   "Tally, everything is your fault. This is something you made us like, "Stella grinned at me as she wrapped herself in a blanket. Was that how I made them? Did I make them this way? They're the ones who are making me resentful right now. All I needed was a glimmer of regret in her eyes for me to forgive them, but she lacked even that. Days, weeks, and months passed me by in a fog. Then, finally, I realized that all of those months had been a deception. A long-believed lie that made me look like an i***t in front of everyone. When I saw Matt go past me as if he hadn't done anything wrong, I tightened my fist. Are they able to deceive me because I am so vulnerable? Or am I the one who forced them to do this to me? Perhaps I will not be in this circumstance because I will ruin myself and regret all of my previous actions if I am. Decisions have led me to this unhappy and helpless state and have made me feel even more worthless. “Are you even in love with me?” Matt smirked from ear to ear as he gazed at me from every angle. “Love? What is it about you that is so intriguing? Tally, you're overweight. You want me to love a big overweight woman who looks like a whale? Huh! Let your imagination run wild!” He snorted as if his words had struck me in the face. I muttered, "Then I'll make you regret that part," as I walked away from them. I walked away, clutching my chest, and felt every ache and pain I was experiencing at the time. Every affliction turned me into a vengeful individual.