Shifting Fates

Aspen Isn’t love supposed to be easy, all knowing, powerful? Don’t most people believe in soul mates, or is that now just a foreign thing? Finding the one person you’re meant to spend the rest of your life with, some fairy tale huh? Not for me. I knew it existed. I knew I would find it. I knew I wanted it. I never in a million years thought it would come in the form of something forbidden, unattainable. Yet here it was. Dangling in front of me like the apple from the Garden of Eden. I couldn’t reach out and take it. I couldn’t bask in the glory of being the one that found my soulmate. They were so rare now, it was hardly talked about. Somehow our kind evolved into not needing the mate bond, how was that even possible? There are stories about how we strayed from the Goddess, and in return she took away our mates. We were forced to be just like the humans, except we still had our wolves. Instead of waiting all our lives to find our mates, we married for convenience, or power, or whatever else excuse there was. Rarely for love. I’ve been around long enough to seen most of my pack married off, and none of them did it for love. It was like a foreign word. In this moment though, I knew it was true. I knew that it could exist for me. The only thing standing in the way? My father's pride, the integrity of the pack, probably some treaties. But at the exact moment our eyes met, I didn’t care. Though, I can’t say the same for him. The forbidden fruit was staring at me like I had three heads. Like I was some sort of abomination. Eh, maybe I was. I could never figure out where I fit, if I fit in with the pack. My hair was naturally gray, but I always like to throw in some bright colors, and currently that color is magenta. My eyes, well my eyes were like electric purple. Bright and vibrant. No one knew why I had such an odd color combination. I mean, come on, who has purple eyes normally? I always felt like I was cursed before I was born, though my parents deny that right to the core. They say I’m blessed. Blessed to look like a freak I guess. That must be what he’s thinking, because he hasn’t moved towards me, yet he hasn’t looked away either. All he has to do is reject me. It would make both of our lives a lot easier, and a lot less painful. Seeing him with her is like a knife to the heart. He knows it, by the look in his eyes. They have a swarm of sadness, confusion, want, hate, every emotion possible. He wanted me to see that it hurt him to do this. He could have stopped the whole thing, rejected me before the pain really set in, but he didn’t. He didn’t want to reject me. I saw that in his eyes too. Which was totally unfair. He didn’t want to reject me, I could never have him, and he could never have me. Why were we setting ourselves up for this failure? “I Aspen Lake DelNik reject you, Silas Lane Hughes as my mate.” I whispered it as quietly as possible, I didn’t want anyone hearing. It wasn’t worth the uproar it would cause. Though, thinking about it now, I should have just said out loud. As soon as the words left my lips, he came barreling towards me. Those around me cowered and moved out of his way, but I just stood there as he came within inches of my face. His breathing was ragged, and- oh gods did he smell good. There were a few gasps, as I didn’t bow, I didn’t even move. He was royalty, I was supposed to do something, but I didn’t. I stood there, chin up, chest out, standing my ground. His nostrils flared, his eyes were dark. There was a meaning behind his eyes that I couldn’t quite catch. His jawline hardened, like he was grinding his teeth trying to keep his mouth shut. “Do you accept?” I was surprised my voice came out so unshaken, unemotional. Like he didn’t meant the world to me. I was trying to save us both from the collision course we were on, didn’t he see that? I noticed the slight shift in his face, like my words and my actions were hurting him. Which, there’s no way they were hurting him more than they were hurting me. Now those that stood around us knew what was going on. They heard my words, and the whispers started. “How is she rejecting him, the soon to be king?” “Foolish girl, no one rejects a king!” “Even an abomination should know to bow to her king.” Yeah yeah, people. I get it. No one likes me. I’m not bowing to the king, yada yada. He’s my mate, I wouldn’t bow to him if he were the last king on earth. We are the same, until he accepts my rejection. Then I will bow before him like everyone else. I can feel his eyes searching mine, like they hold some kind of answer for him. But they don’t. I’m remaining unmoved by the events. He can’t chose me, not over her. She’s to be his and I’m to be without a fated mate, one so rare. “It’s rare. Why would I pass it up?” His words come out so soft and gentle, my heart nearly melted. Nearly. “Rare or not, we cannot be.” My own words are stabbing daggers into my chest as I stare at him. His eyes are staring straight into my heart. He knows me. He knows this is not what I want. How we never knew we were mates until this moment, I will never understand. Before I can stop him, he reached out and pulled me closer to him. More gasps and even a shriek came from the crowd. Oh just great. He rest his forehead on mine, causing some serious sparks, making us both gasp. “You are mine.” He whispered, gripping my hips tighter. I bit my lip, fighting the urge to kiss him. I cannot be his. This cannot happen. I shook my head. “Please, Si, don’t make me beg you to reject me. You know we cannot be, no matter how much we both want it.” I whispered, closing my eyes and forgetting the world around us for a long as I could. “Silas!” The voice boomed through the hall, causing me to jump and him to hold me tighter. His father’s voice was as scary as scary gets. “Let the girl go. You have a duty.” His voice was getting closer, which meant he would be next to us in seconds. “Accept it, Si.” I whispered softly, my eyes still closed. I could feel him trembling in my arms, and I fought back my tears. This will not break me. I can come back from this. “I’ll find a way to fix this, Aspen. I cannot accept your rejection, but I have to marry her.” He was pulling away as he spoke and now it was my turn to tremble. He wasn’t letting me go. How was I supposed to move on from this moment? The forbidden fruit still dangling in front of me. I felt his lips to my forehead as the lone tear fell from my closed eyes. “I will fix this, Aspen. You are mine. “He lifted my chin with his finger and I opened my eyes. “Mine.” And then he did the stupidest thing he could think of and pressed his lips to mine. The crowd faded out as he held my lips, his father’s booming voice sounded distant. Nothing mattered but the two of us. When the kiss broke, I shook my head. “That was stupid Silas. So stupid.” I lifted my eyes to see his smirking face before he turned and slowly made his way back to her. It was like my world was crashing all around me and I couldn’t stop it even if I tried. How could he do this to me? Didn’t he know that I was going to feel everything? “You may kiss the bride.” Those words were daggers into my already bleeding heart. I could feel his eyes on me as I made my way to the back of the gathered crowd. I couldn’t let him see the pain that I was feeling. The moment their lips touched, I nearly fell to my knees, if it wasn’t for the strong arms that held me upright. “Don’t let him see you weak, my queen.” “I’m no one’s queen.” I spat, looking up at the man who held me in his arms. Zion, one of my father’s favorites. We had been friends since my childhood, and yet he always felt more like my brother. His deep chuckle caught me off guard. “You’re our queen.” The sound gave me goosebumps. I was their Queen, technically, but we didn’t abide by the old laws anymore. “And I was telling you not to let the King see you weak. Not the future King.” He smirked, as he helped me out of the building into the fresh air. “I’m not weak. I am hurt. There is a difference. “Even though I knew there wasn’t. I felt his chuckle, as if he knew I was trying to act tough. He’d always looked out for me, even in small cases like this when I didn’t know he was around. “We should leave before they make out of the church. “He said looking around for the horses. I didn’t even want to come, but because my father couldn’t make it, I was forced to attend for him. Never again will I go someplace in his stead. Never. I never fit in with the crowd here, I didn’t even fit in with my own pack. I could hear the commotion behind us as everyone was slowly filing out of the church to welcome the newlyweds out into the road. “Zion..” I didn’t even have to finish my sentence, he lifted me into his arms, taking large strides towards the horses. I kept telling myself not to look, it would make the pain more intense, more real that it already was. But I had to look. I had to see him one last time. Just as Zion was helping me onto my horse, I caught sight of him coming out of the church. She was next to him, smiling, holding his arm. His face held a frown and I could tell his eyes were scanning for me. It was like he could feel me staring at him from as far away as I was, but his eyes found mine. The pull on my heart worsened, and his eyes widened, seeing that I was on top of my horse. His big blue eyes were pleading with me, but he had no idea how crushed my heart was. I couldn’t stay. I couldn’t work this out with him, because there was nothing to work out. He was hers, and I would forever be in pain. Zion gripped my hand tightly before taking the lead of my horse. I was in no shape to ride. I could barely hold myself upright. I managed to pull my eyes away from him as we started moving, I couldn’t look at the sadness in his eyes. We barely made it ten feet when I clutched my hand over my heart and gave a small yelp, then a sob. Whatever they were doing, I could feel it. “Zion, get me out of here. Please.” I begged, holding in the sobs that wanted to break free. I was stronger than this, I wouldn’t let them break me. My pack member had a different idea though. He brought me close to his horse and held us steady side by side. “Let him feel how you feel. Even if just for a moment.” He whispered before grasping the side of my face with his hands and placing a gentle kiss to my lips. As wrong as it felt, I let him. My need to make Silas feel my pain overrode everything else. The roar that was heard broke us apart and send a cold shiver down my spine. I dared look back at him, his eyes were black and his hand was clutching his heart. He felt it, and he was hurt. Good. The woman he married was kneeling next to him, holding on to him, but his gaze was on me. “Let’s get you home, my queen.” Zion said with another squeeze of my hand before taking lead again. This time, I kept my eyes on Silas until I could no longer see him. He wasn’t going to be coming after me. He wasn’t going to accept my rejection. We were both going to be miserable. Him twice over, since he had to marry her and lose me.