DEAD ALIVE

BEAUTY

Lady Elisa was pretty very pretty probably the most beautiful woman that I have ever seen, she has the perfect body.

She was average height slim body, beautiful blonde long hair bright blue eyes and the most perfect white smile.

I watch as she ate her food with class she was so elegant with everything that she did, her dress was the most prettiest that i have seen. the way she spoke, the way she laugh and the way she walked was just so amazing.

they kids love her they were always around her since she got here she was good with them, Henry was currently sitting on her lap as she fed him.

"Nadia, get more stew", Lady Elizabeth said and I quickly went to get more stew from the kitchen with Loretta following behind me with an empty jug of water.

"she's so pretty", Loretta said giggling happily making me to roll my eyes, "yes she is", I said getting the stew and leaving her there.

They finish eating and I clear the table while master Robert took lady Elisa out for a walk to show her around.

I went to her to check if everything was in order as per lady Elizabeth request, the two girls she came with went with them following behind them and keeping a reasonable distance i guess they were supposed to follow her around.

Loretta and i talked about the days event while we wash the large amount of dirty dishes that was left behind, I haven't gotten the chance to personally meet the lady yet but from the looks of things she looked like a really nice person, she smiles a lot.

I was glad that master Robert like her a lot he look like a fool around her which was a good thing for me because i am finally free from him. I could sleep peacefully now without the fear of him coming at night and i could visit mama jess and Ceaser at night since he would be occupied with his wife to be.

Lady Elizabeth and her husband were staying for the night its going to be a full house it was strange there was never this much people in the house before.

Sara and Henry were excited to have everyone around while meow was afraid and is currently hiding in my room.

"I can't wait for today to be over", I said yawing I was exhausted i always am, my heart skip a bit when i remember the i haven't taken any preventive measures since master force himself on me last night.

my heart began pounding heavily in my chest as it was getting late and i need to get some herbs even if it wasn't a hundred percent sure i would only feel better if I drank it.

it was dark and we still haven't finished what we were doing i couldn't sit still I was anxious the fear of getting pregnant especially with lady Elisa being here, it a bad idea.

I waited for them to go to sleep but they were still very much awake in the sitting room they were drinking wine and chatting amongst themselves they didn't look as though they will be going to bed anytime soon.

I was restless i felt like there was a baby already growing in my stomach, I waited until I was sure that they were all asleep before running out to go get some herbs.

it was morning already around 1:30am i was sleepy and tired but this was a necessary i needed the herbs badly i couldn't afford to getting pregnant again.

I went through the bushes searching for what i needed, I have gotten almost everything and was looking for two more herbs when suddenly there was a bright light blindind my eyes.

I began running as fast as i could when I tripped falling hard and bruising my arm, It was a bad idea to be caught out here at this time of the night, I didn't know who was after me but I know that they would kill me if I get caught.

I tried getting up to run but there was a gun to the back of my head, "move and i will kill you filthy n***o", a gruff voice spoke.

I was shaking badly, I am a n***o and that meant that he could kill me and get away with it I didn't want to die not like this.

"Are you trying to escape", a shaggy looking old man asked me kicking me in the stomach, they were two of them the other one held a gun to my head while the other grip my hair asking me questions.

"no sir, I only came here to get some herbs I don't feel so well", I said showing them the herbs that i held tightly praying the would believe me and let me go.

"Who do you work for n***o", he yelled in my face sending saliva all over my face i was so disgusted.

"Master Robert, i work for master Robert sir", i said with a shaking voice while he pulled me to my feet and began dragging me with them i didn't know where we were going but I said a prayer for my life.

They drag me by my hair and on my knees down to the master's house they were going to cause a scene that would only get me in trouble my knees were bruised badly due to all the dragging on the rough gravels.

My sides and stomach was hurting badly due to all the kicking and punches that i have received from this two ugly looking men.

They both had long ugly brown beards they were so huge and muscular they looked alike they must be brothers.

I was hurting so badly but they kept on dragging me roughly they didn't even let me walk they just kept dragging and pushing me.

"Trying to escape from your master are we", they taller one said forcing me on my knees as we got to the front of the house.

They knocked on the door but everyone was asleep so no one answer the door, they looked at each other before the one with the gun cracked his gun shooting it in the air, it was scary.

They house door open with master rushing out with his own gun in his hand ready for action with his parents and they others following behind him.

"we caught your slave trying to escape", one of the brothers said pushing me forward to fall in front of master.

"I wasn't trying to escape", I said wiping the blood that was dripping down from my nose my eyes were fill with angry tears, I wanted to fight them all.

"I went to get some herbs, I was feeling sick", I said to no one in particular as they were all staring at me.

Master went to they men shaking their hands while saying thank you to them for capturing the his run away slave.

Lady Elisa came to me taking the herbs from my hands examining them, "what were you going to do with this", she spoke her voice soft and calm.

"I was feeling sick, i think a fever", I said with my head down she didn't say anything but she didn't give them back to me all my hard work was in vain and for what.

"I will take care of this mess", master said kissing his mother's cheek as she walked inside with her husband, he walked to lady Elisa kissing her hands while apologizing for the interruption before leading her to go inside.

"you just love all the attention don't you", he said fueling my anger it's his fault that i was here in the first place. can he please just die.

"I went to get the herbs to avoid getting pregnant by you", I said loosing my temper i couldn't take it anymore what's the worst that could happen anyway.

"it's your fault I'm here anyway why don't you just leave me alone you sick rapist, just leave me alone", I scream at him loosing my mind, I just hated this man.

He kicked my face hard with his foot causing my teeth to bite hard on my the kick unexpected and expected at the same time I knew what i was doing was going to get me in trouble but i just didn't care.

They pain i felt was unexplainable as he kicked my face again so hard that i thought i heard a bone crack.

"Talk to me like that again, f*****g talk to me like that again", he spoke with anger directly to my face while holding tightly on my jaw it hurts so bad but i didn't care.

"let go of me", I said trying my best to get out of his hold, if he has lost his mind then so have i, even I was crazy, I have had enough.

"he grab the back of my neck so tightly connecting our forehead together, he was breathing so hard in my face and so was i, he was on his knees and i was also sitting on my knees.

"let go__" I didn't finished my statement because his grip grew painfully tight, "shut up, shut up", he said so very close to my mouth with danger dancing in his eyes.

We both stay like that for a while catching our breath before i finally broke loose from him keeping a safe distance between us, he sat on the floor with his right hand supporting his head, I didn't make a sound as i also sat there looking at him, the anger that I felt earlier slowly dying down as i stare at the mentally challenge man in front of me.

He walked away without saying a word to me or even looking at me, i waited for a few minutes before following after him to go lie my head for a second as it was already almost time for waking up anyway.

I tried getting in but the door was locked, he had locked me out I guess that was my punishment, I sat in front of the house only realizing now how freezing the weather was, I was begging to freeze and I was starting to feel the pain of all my injuries that I had obtain from they brothers and master.

My stomach was hurting badly because of all the kick I had endure, i didn't drink the herbs but I bet the baby must have died by now if the was one in me the surely won't survive all the harsh blows.

I sat out side in the cold hugging my self as I finally began to cry, I was crying because i was cold, I was crying because my body was hurting and i was so hungry and tired, I was crying because master always got away with everything and i always had to pay for his sins.

He knew that i went to get those herbs because I didn't want to have his baby, I expected him to stand for me or at least to not hurt me but he went ahead and did the exact opposite, I felt so hummilated, dirty and used.

I really felt like running away it was a deadly risk but maybe i was ready for the consequences, I don't want to keep living this life of misery and pain, I know that i sound like an awful person now but i wish that master would leave me be and go on Loretta, she seems as one with high level of tolerance.

I felt sorry for wishing that on Loretta she was a nice and naive girl even if she can be very annoying she was over all nice I just need master off my back and maybe he would back off if he finds a new toy.

~~~

it's been a week since that awful incident between master and i, he didn't say anything about that night and he didn't punish me either, not like i deserve one any way.

Lady Elisa was alright i haven't really gotten into a major trouble with her besides the usual scolding and name calling, I hardly ever spoke to her since Gladys was there to do everything for her, Gladys is the slave she had come along with, she was a really quiet girl she rarely ever spoke and when she did it was straight to the point, I liked her because she was minding her own business.

Master Robert haven't being in my business since that day which i was very grateful for, he stayed away from me and I from him, my life was easier with out him bothering me honestly there was lots of work but I didn't mind, working was the last of my worries and besides Loretta was always there to make it fast and fun.

They kids, I rarely got the chance to play with them as lady Elisa was already playing a mother's role in their life, they were always with her and they loved it because they would always go with her and master for a stroll around town almost every evening, I was happy for them at least the get to escape out of this prison.

There wasn't time to play with Henry anymore and Sara was growing cold towards me she says hurtful things every now and then but i didn't blame her it was bound to happen anyway.

Learning was hard but not impossible, there was little time but i was determined and i was learning fast and good, learning was fun i wasn't an expert in reading but at least i was trying,i couldn't read a full sentence without hanging but i was trying.

Meow and i have gotten closer as i was all the poor kitten have since the kids were so busy with their new life to play with her and the lady Elisa isn't so fun of cats,she followed me every i go and sleeps with me in my room.

Lady Deborah, lady Elisa's friend i didn't like her at all she was so nosy she was always in other people business, she always wanted to know what was going on around the house always sneaking up on me and Loretta whenever we were working and discussing amongst ourselves,there was never a private with her around.

Master Robert and lady Elisa seem to be in love already,good for me. they were always around each other and master didn't look so grumpy when he was with her,they looked happy I guess the would be getting married soon. i was happy.

Lady Elizabeth and her husband had gone back home thankfully, she was making my life a living hell, 'Nadia do this for sweet Elisa, Nadia do that for precious Elisa, you are so very lazy Nadia', it was always Nadia. she always wanted to please her golden Elisa she would sacrifice me in a heart beat if lady Elisa asked for my head.

It was a Sunday and i was currently sitting with mama jess as she puts my hair into cornrows my hair was a big mess.

"I can't wait for them to get married and make babies", i said giggling as mama jess smack my head, I love babies as long as the ain't mine.

"you better stay clear of trouble girl", she said and i roll my eyes, we sat on the floor in her room eating as she filled me in on all that has been happening around here and i told her everything that has been going on with me and all the weirdos that I lived with.

I told her about how i had almost lost my life when those crazy brothers accused me of wanting to escape, she was laughing so hard as i told her of how scared i was then it hit me that i never really took the herbs for preventive measures lady Elisa had taken it away from me and never gave it back.

"mama?", I asked and she humm a reply. "I didn't drink the herbs after he came at me, can i have it now", I asked hopefully.

"how long ago", she asked "about a week ago", i said looking at her expectantly.

"well it's a little to late for that now, but you don't have to worry a woman doesn't get pregnant each time a man lies with her",she said smiling at me trying to convince me as if i were a child, yes a woman does always get pregnant each time a man lie with her but I how sure am i that i wasn't already pregnant.

I don't know what i would do if I get pregnant again I just lost a child and its way to soon for another abortion I almost died the last time.

"Relax,I assure you that you aren't pregnant", mama jess said looking me in the eye, I believe her not because i thought that she was right buf because its what I needed so desperately to heare,i needed some one to assure me that i wasn't pregnant.

I decided to no think or worry to much about it, I am going to live my life now and then deal with whatever comes my way later.

I stayed with mama jess all day until it was evening before i went back to the master's house.

"where do you always run off too" lady Deborah asked standing by the kitchen door with folded arms,I didn't know why this matters to her but i answer anyway with a smile,i don't need anymore enemies.

"I always go to visit my family back at the quarters",I said wiping my hands giving her my full attention I needed her to like me.