1
3rd September (Tuesday)
She sat admiring the sites by the river, the leaves holding their ground till fall which wouldn’t be far away now. It was a rather fresh morning, so cool in the brisk September air.
Her hair hung over her pierced face and bright red hair. Her new school head disapproved of her many piercings, but they weren’t going anywhere for no one, no matter how hard they insisted upon it. She smoked through the disapproval of her mother.
She had many skeletons to hide. Would a new high school make more?
She had been booked in to see the school shrink two days a week to explore her background and her school life. She’d rather move to the quiet countryside, she’d rather be dead right now than there.
“Autumn school in five.”
“Yes mom.”
She doubted out her cigarette and pulled herself up. Luckily for her, her mother drove, or she’d be really late for her first day and get detention. Though she clearly had no interest in starting her new high school, not ever, she had no choice over it. She had to finish high school. She opened the car door, sliding in, closing the door and fastening her seat belt. Her head hung low. The older lady started the engine changing gear, pulling away. ‘I’m sorry for all of this Autumn, but we needed a new beginning.’
She looked through her fringe at her mother into her rimmed glasses, replying. “Why, so I wouldn’t be next?”
“Look Autumn, it’s not your fault.”
“So why does it feel that way?”
“Please Autumn, it was hard for me too.”
“You really think this place will be any different?”
“Yes I do.”
“I hope for all our sakes you’re right.”
Autumn’s mother pulled up outside the high school. “I’ll pick you up.”
“I’ll walk. I need the air.”
“Sure.”
Autumn opened the door, getting out of the car. “I’ll see you later Autumn.”
“Sure mom.”
She closed the door, looking at the small building a lot smaller than the high school she had come from. An older lady walked up to her, straight-faced. “Miss Cleveland. Mr. Greyson will be seeing you this morning.”
She looked at her new principle. “Sure.”
“I’ll show you to his office. Don’t screw this one up Miss. Cleveland, you won’t be getting another chance.”
“I won’t.”
“And I prefer you don’t wear jewelry to school.”
The head mistress escorted Autumn to a small office with a gold plaque with “Mr. Greyson School Psychiatrist” was written upon it. “Right here we are. I’d like it if the piercings are gone by our next meeting.”
“Sure, whatever!”
She knocked on the door. “Mr. Grayson. Miss. Cleveland to see you.”
“Send her in.”
The head mistress opened the door. “Go in and remember he’s there to help.”
Autumn smiled vaguely. She didn’t speak to her mother. Why should she talk to a total stranger about how she was feeling right now? She stepped into the regular-sized office. “Will you shut the door and take a seat?’ The scruffy male with piercings said. She closed the door. This was going to be so easy, a f*****g breeze even. She walked over and sat down. He looked at her. ’So how are we this morning?”
She looked at him weirdly. “Okay I guess.”
“So what would you like to talk about?”
She pulled a confused expression. Hadn’t this guy got her notes? Was this guy for real?
“I take it you didn’t want to come here?”
“No I didn’t. I had no choice.”
“Why not?”
“Like I said, I had no choice.”
“What’s wrong, Autumn? I can call you Autumn, can’t I?”
“I guess.”
“So what’s eating you this morning?”
“Miss sour face said I had to get rid of my piercings, none of my old teachers cared.”
He placed his hand on hers, nerving her. “You should be yourself, that’s what makes you, you.”
Why did this guy make so much sense?
“So, Autumn, why did you come here?”
“Stuff.”
“Must be some pretty heavy stuff to have to resort to a shrink.”
“Mom thought it would be a good idea to get things off my chest.”
“But, we’re having a hard time doing that. Why?”
“It’s just so hard to.”
“Just think of me as your friend.”
“So you can die on me too?” She snapped, slipping up.
“Now we’re getting somewhere.”
“I...I..”
“I’m here to help.”
“You’re like nineteen. How can you possibly help?”
“Try me.”
“I can’t.”
“What are you so scared of Autumn?”
“I don’t want you to die!” she cried.
“I aint going anywhere. I’ll help you through this, I promise.”
“How? My friends are dead! And I’m here to forget. What am I supposed to forget?”
“You haven’t got to. You just need to find a way to carry on and keep it in here.” He said, tapping her chest.
She looked at him, his eyes sparkled. Why did this guy connect with her?
He edged forward. Another male walked into the room, maybe in his early forties, dyed black hair, distinguished designer glasses , wearing a suit, maybe pinstripe. “So how are we getting on Mathew?”
“Good.”
“Remember what I said. You’re here to help not harass.”
“Yes sir.”
He looked at Autumn, who had now sunk into herself. “You must be Miss. Cleveland.”
“Yeah.”
“I’m Mr. Grayson.”
“Oh, but I thought.”
“Didn’t Mathew tell you?”
“No. I didn’t get no name.”
He looked at Mathew disappointed. “What did I tell you, Mathew?”
“I’m sorry Sir, I forgot.”
“Introductions first.”
Mathew looked at Autumn. “I’m Mathew Harding, you’re quite close on my age. I’m in my third year psychology degree at university. I’m here to learn and gain experience as a psychiatrist. Mr. Greyson left me in charge of your case study. He thought a younger face might help to crack the ice.”
“Oh.”
“I can take over if you prefer me too.”
“I..”
“My lecturer will be observing me with you and a few other students for my course. If that is cool with you?”
“I guess.”
He smiled.
“I’m sorry, Miss Cleveland, but time is you have English and you can’t be late.”
“Sure.” He looked at Autumn. “Well, I’ll see you Thursday.”
She smiled politely, pulling herself up.
“I’ll show you to the class.”
“Okay.”
“Remember what I said, Mathew, introduction first.”
“I will.”
They walked out of the office. Mr. Greyson closed the door. ‘This way.’ He said, veering his arm to the right. Autumn followed him down the long winding corridor. “I’m sorry Miss. Cleveland I should’ve told Miss. Strum Mathew was taking you.”
“That’s okay.”
“He’s a nice lad, he’ll go far if he puts his head into it and listens.”
She smiled. He made a lot of sense to her.
“Well, here we are.”
She smiled.
“I’ll see you on Thursday.”
“Okay.”
He opened the door, looking at the oddly-styled lady in her mid-thirties. “Miss. Shan, Miss. Cleveland.”
“Come in.”
She looked at Mr Greyson for re-assurance. “Go on go in, and we’ll talk Thursday.”
She smiled, walking into the half-full room as the door closed.
“Take a seat.”
She walked to the back of the room, many of the pupils cutting their eyes at her as she walked passed, finding an empty seat at the back. “Right I see Mr. Harborne is still not with us, so I’ll begin.”
Mr. Greyson walked back into the office closing the door, looking directly at Mathew. “I’ll take over from you on Thursday with Miss. Cleveland.”
“Why?”
“I saw you. I said no closeness.”
“There won’t be, I promise.”
“I can’t take that chance.”
“Please. We have a connection; I promise she’ll open up to me. I need this for my final report. She’s so different from the others. I can connect and get her to talk.”
“Fine.” He sighed. “But, no more Mathew.”
“I won’t I promise.”
