The Fall

I’m only going to tell you what I know happened. We have all heard the story of what the “old” government said was happening and what the conspiracy theorists said. Honestly, I don’t know what happened to start the infection, just what it looked like at my end of the world. It all started on one of those really cold days in fall, the ones that make you think "f**k, I really wish that I had a better coat than the sorry ass sweater that I’m using as a coat". It’s at times like these that I wish I had made more money but as I had never gone to more than 3 weeks of college, I’m stuck in a s**t job working for no money at a gas station/deli. I was working on my 6th cup of coffee and waiting out the last 20 minutes of my shift when I happened past the small TV in the corner of the cafe. Some daytime soap was on but what really caught my eye was the breaking news scroll on the bottom of the screen: Death tolls up to 1,000 in the city from the flu. Now, this is not something new, people die from the flu all the time we just don’t hear about it, but ever since 9/11 all news stations make small events a huge breaking news event meant to scare the public into watching CNN for hours on end. The sad part is that it usually works because I changed the station to CNN and watched some reporters talking to a very young-looking doctor, who was explaining that this flu epidemic was nothing new and that people should just use common sense. I laughed to myself - common sense, people don’t have common sense, that I know from firsthand experience. I watch people, day in and day out, some are barely even able to figure out how to work the gas pump and now they are expected to not catch the bug that’s going around. All I could think about was how I was surely going have a huge paycheck as I know that my two other coworkers would be out sick after hearing about this. Janice and Tom were older than me by at least 16 years and they were dumb as rocks. I know that’s an insult to some rocks. These two have never aspired to anything in their lives other than who could drink, smoke and b***h the most, and all of that on work time. I would hate to see them outside work. These two were “hicks” right down to the missing teeth and the cut-off tees and jeans. Not a sight you would want to see and yet I’m subjected to it every day. I really need to get the hell out of this town. Finally, it was 6:30, I was free to go and I knew right where I was headed. Straight to Mike’s. We have been together for almost 2 years and today was our two year anniversary. I had a feeling that something special was about to happen. Mike called and asked me to come over after work. Can you say engagement? I can, I thought, with a squeal of excitement. I pulled up to Mike’s apartment and stopped the car looking at myself in the visor mirror just to make sure that I looked Okay. Looking in the mirror all I could think was “man I’m lucky to have Mike because I’m no supermodel". With my short stocky frame, I’m 5’2 and 170 pounds, I have always been on the heavy side but I have never really had a reason to lose the extra weight. My brown hair is always in a ponytail as that seems to be the only way to keep it out of my face. My best feature by far is my dark brown eyes, they almost look black and they are the same eyes that everyone in my family has. As a teenager, I wished to be taller and thinner with blond hair and blue eyes but that was just not in the cards for me. I have never really had a steady boyfriend. I was always content to be just one of the guys. It was like I never really felt that I deserved to be with someone that was good looking because I was not good looking myself. Closing the mirror I sigh and got out of the car. I make the short walk to his apartment and knocked once just to let him know that it was me and I turned the key and walked in. The apartment was quiet. “Hello"? No answer, so I started into the kitchen, nothing there but some empty beer cans on the counter and an empty pizza box. I turned and made my way into the bedroom. As I got closer I heard the sound of Mike snoring softly. He must have fallen asleep. I left and returned to the kitchen did some light cleaning and turned on the TV. No stories of the killer flu that's going around, just your everyday run of the mill stories of people treating each other like crap. It was about 20 minutes later that I heard movement in the bedroom. Mike appeared looking confused. “What are you doing here?” he asked. “You called me at work and asked me to come over,” I said. “Oh ya, that’s right,” he said as he started to turn and walk to the kitchen. “So are we going out tonight or are we staying in?” “What, why would we go out?” he said from inside the refrigerator. “Because it’s our two year anniversary,” I said annoyed “It is? Oh man then this is going to suck even more," I heard him say under his breath. There was a knock at the door and Mike looked at me and then to the door. He looked nervous. “What’s up? Did you call for pizza or something?” I asked as I started to get off the couch to answer the door, but Mike beat me to the door and he cracked the door and peeked out. I heard him whispering something but from where I sat on his couch I could not see who was at the door. Mike stopped talking and looked back at me and then back out the door. The person on the other side of the door was trying to push their way into the apartment it was obvious that they were not happy about being kept outside. I could start to hear the voices. What struck me was that they both sounded male. I got up and made my way to the door. “What’s going on?” I asked as I rounded the corner. I could see that the other person was indeed a man, I stopped, where did I know him from? Mike opened to door all the way and let him in the apartment with us. Mike started to talk but stopped. He looked confused and lost for words. Then he finally spoke up, his voice was soft and quiet. “Jane this is Sam, Sam this is Jane …. My friend.... the one that I told you about.” Sam looked at me and slowly nodded his head, a look of acknowledgment can over his face. “O ... I see, have you told her?” Sam said quietly Mike closed the door and moved toward me with his arms out like he was going to give me a hug but instead he motioned me toward the couch. “Sit down, I have something to tell you,” Mike said in such a way that I felt as if bad news was coming. “What is it?” I asked looking at him hoping that I was wrong. “I... I … don’t want to hurt you... and I’ve been trying to tell you this for some time, it.... just was never that right time...you know” He slowed, I was urging him to speak, but I knew where this was heading and there was no way to stop the train wreck that forming on Mike’s face. Tears started to form in his eyes and I felt bad for him. “I still love you,” he said as the first tears fell. “But I also love Sam,” he said just loud enough to be heard. Wait, what?!? Did I hear him correctly; was he breaking up with me for another man? Really? Was that what was happening right now? I felt stiff and awkward silence filled the room and I looked past Mike over his shoulder to where Sam stood frozen by the door, he looks almost as scared and hurt as Mike. Great, now I feel bad for him too! Mike leaned in to hug me and I let him hug me while I sat there looking lost and confused. I pushed my way out of the hug and started to stand, not sure what I should be feeling whether to be mad, hurt, sad, betrayed, confused, and mad. I kept coming back to mad and so I went with it. “Let me get this right. You LOVE HIM and HE LOVES you, and YOU never meant to HURT ME!” as I was saying it I felt like a b***h that I know I’m not. All that I could think about was how I was going to be flipping through the channels and see myself on some daytime talk show acting stupid as I re-confronted these two men. I didn't want that. Mike’s face turned down and more tears were falling from his eyes, Sam made a move and was at Mike’s side holding him. It would have been clear to an outsider that these two were indeed in love and as hurt, as I was feeling their love, touched me. I calmed down ... a little. “I have to go, I can’t be here.” Getting dumped by my boyfriend on our two year anniversary as his lover holds him. I grabbed my coat/sweater and stormed out shutting the door only to open the door and slam it, after all, what good is it to storm out if you don't slam a few doors. Sitting in my car I let the first of many tears start and said out loud “Could my day get any worse?”