Dead (Stray Kids/SKZ)

"Oh Channie, it's so beautiful!" Changbin exclaimed, hugging his boyfriend. Chan had arranged for them to stay at a hotel on Jeju Island for a few days he had off work, and he had also arranged a romantic dinner by the beach, on his Mom's credit card. Changbin had a ring in his new Air Jordan hoodie pocket. It was chilly, but he still wanted to dress up, because tonight, he was going to propose to Changbin. They sat down and Changbin looked around for the menu, but Chan shook his head. "No menu, they'll make whatever you want. Consider this a vacation," Chanbin reached for Chan's hands. "I love you so much, Channie. You make me so happy and feel so loved," Chan blushed. "I'm glad. You know I adore you, right?" Changbin nodded. "That was so yummy, thank you. Can we take a little beach walk, then go up to the room and maybe have s*x?" Changbin asked shyly. "Yeah, we can do that. I brought lube," Chan took Changbin's hand and led him toward the sand. It was dark, and the moonlight reflected onto the ocean. "Do you want me to get a towel so we can sit down?" Chan asked. Changbin's eyes sparkled. "Yes, please," Chan jogged back to the hotel and grabbed a towel from the pool rack. He spread it out on the sand and sat down next to Changbin, who leaned his head onto his shoulder. "I love you, Binnie," Chan kissed the top of Changbin's head. Changbin wrapped his arms around Chan's waist and breathed in his scent. Chan scooted in front of Changbin and kneeled. He opened the box, revealing the sparkling diamond ring. "Seo Changbin, you have always been with me when I needed you and never abandoned me. I love you more than I have loved anybody else. Will you marry me?" he asked. Changbin's eyes filled with tears. "Channie...I'm sorry but...no," Chan felt his heart shatter. "N-no?" he closed the box and shoved it back into his pocket. "Channie...I'm sorry. You probably feel like s**t. I’m just not ready to commit to something so major. You know how scary commitment is to me," Changbin hugged Chan, but Chan's return hug was fake. He felt horrible. What did he do wrong? Was he not good enough? Was he bad at gifts or s*x or romance or something? Why didn't his boyfriend of 6 years want to marry him? "It's ok. It's not your fault I'm a s**t boyfriend," Chan smiled through the pain and kissed Changbin. "Oh Channie, you're an amazing boyfriend. It's just that I'm not sure how good of a husband and possibly a father I could be. I think that my insecurities would get in the way and it would break down our relationship and everything we've built together. It's best to stay boyfriends for now, so I don't f**k anything up. You're amazing, Channie, and I think so highly of you and adore you. Please don't talk badly about yourself, it hurts me when I hear how lowly you think of yourself because you're the most beautiful human being I've ever met, inside and out. You're sweet and kind and loving and talented and hardworking and handsome and sexy and everything in between. I do want to marry you when the time's right. Keep that ring, I like it a lot," Changbin kissed Chan again and rested his head on Chan's shoulder. "I hate myself, Bin. I want to be perfect for you. I'm so far away from perfect, but I work every day to be closer to perfect for you. How can I improve?" Changbin looked up at Chan. "I want you to see yourself how I see you because if you did, you would never say things like that. I see you like a pink sunrise. Special and rare and beautiful and warm. You're amazing. Please don't change, because I like Bang Christopher Chan just the way he is. And I want him to love himself just as much as I do," Changbin whispered. Chan smiled, but it was fake. "Let's go up to the room. I'll make love to you, then we can sleep," Changbin loved how romantic Chan was when it came to s*x. He never used phrases like f*****g or doing it. He always referred to it as making love, because that's what it is. It's them showing their love for each other through touch. Chan wasn't the type to rip Changbin's clothes off or ask for oral. Chan slowly undressed Changbin and caressed him and told him how beautiful he was. Chan never asked for anything or gave instructions. He always left things open for Changbin to decide, because he wanted Changbin to feel comfortable. They walked hand in hand back to the hotel.