THE MISTRESS ?

*Not good enough*

Chris pov

I drive home with a big smile on my face. If anyone sees my face now,they would think I have won the jackpot. Although,I did win a jackpot which is my heartbeat - Selena.

"Wait,what the hell? Did I just call her my heartbeat? Damn! I really need to chill out" I say to myself.

I finally arrive at my house and I drive in. I park my car and enter the house. I turn on the lights and lock the door behind me. I sit on my couch and start ruminating over the events of the day.

I lift my hand up to touch my lips. I can't still believe that she kissed me. That was my first kiss and it is definitely a wonderful feeling. I am so glad I saved my first kiss for someone special. The way she took control of the kiss and rubbed my head made my heart beat so fast. It was like bliss to me. At that moment,it felt like the kiss should never end.

I begin to feel restless, so I stand up and walk upstairs. I enter my bedroom before walking to the balcony. I rest my hands on the rails. It is my favorite place in my house because I could easily view and enjoy the beauty of the night sky. Usually,I would lose myself in the endless sheet of diamond-studded skies. But tonight I was distracted and couldn't stop thinking about her.

Selena is the type of girl many guys dreamed of. She is extraordinarily beautiful, confident and successful in her business. Hell! She is my dream woman. But,I don't think I am good enough for her. I am just a plain looking guy with a small business who has nothing to offer. I don't deserve her. She is way above my level and definitely deserves someone better.

I feel my heart sinking as a lot of negative thoughts come to my head. "I am worthless. Nobody can ever love me. My dad never showed love to me and my female best friend who loved me is dead."

Tears begin to roll down my face as all of these thoughts flow through my mind. I thought I have already overcome that phase of my life whereby I was usually sad and had negative thoughts.

"I am definitely so stupid for even talking to her. I have to avoid her so as to save myself from future heartbreak and depression." I say to myself as I clean my face with tissues.

"Ping!ping!ping!" I hear the beeping of my phone inside my pocket. I take out my phone and see that I have messages from Selena.

"Hey"

"I just wanted to check up on you to confirm that you arrived home safely"

"Oh my God! How do I want to avoid her when she wouldn't give me a break" I think to myself as I stare at the message.

"Yeah,I am already home. Thanks" I reply.

"Oh! I am glad to hear that. I was worried about your safety. I just wanted to let you know that I really enjoyed our date and would definitely not mind having another date with you. Thanks so much."

"Well,I am usually busy. I don't think I have time for such. But,thanks anyway" I text back. I immediately switch off my phone and throw it on my bed in the room. I hope she gets the message that I am not interested in this. She would find her Mr. Right elsewhere. It's for the best.

I sigh as I continue to stare at the stars in the sky, feeling completely sad at my decision.