Never Not Married

Unguarded cravings

“It seems you are more fond of it than I am”Amber said staring at Helena who is busy pampering the flowers.She responds with a smile.

“They had been a thing of comfort to me since I was a child”Helena said.

“Well it had been for me too although there was something else__someone”Amber looks down at her foot.She couldn’t stop herself from talking about the past with Helena there but she just wanted her to know how truly she felt.

“You can go on__Amber”Helena said and stands beside Amber.

“I don’t think you would really want to hear it..it’s just the past am stupidly fantasizing about”Amber kept a straight face.She stares at her reflection in the lake.A flash of memory came to her.She remembered her first encounter with Edward,it had started with a fight.She smiles and then keep her cool gaze back on.

“If you are perhaps thinking I and Edward are in love and it’s making you uncomfortable being with me,please that is not it__It was just arranged,our marriage,I never loved him__ he never loved me”Helena defended her relationship with Edward.She was feeling uncomfortable with the feeling of Amber not feeling comfortable with her.

“I know that already,only a child wouldn’t notice the cold gaze you two share and the smile you never shared with him even for once”Amber chuckles also did Helena.

“But nevertheless,once married shall end together,even if there wasn’t love,you would create a large family you never imagined”Amber said,reviewing her own case of marriage.She knew her beloved past lover would eventually accept Helena as the mother of his children so she need not tell a story Helena never needed to hear.

“Edward doesn’t care about me__and I don’t think he would,he had a true love he wouldn’t rid off his mind”Helena smiles thinking her words could make Amber feel better.

Since it was just the beginning of winter,snow had been falling slowly.Amber seats on the little snow which had pile up.

“You would get your clothes dirty”Helena said.

“ I have much more”Amber said and look back at the lake.Helena stares for some seconds and then decides to join her.

“It was summer,the flowers were looking much alive than it is now,the lake wasn’t full because sun had been helping drying it up”Amber begins.

“Edward had always loved seating beside the lake alone,listening to the birds chirp.I had saw him but ignored his presence,I went over to cut down the sunflower which shined the most amongst the flowers,I didn’t know it was the flower he had watched growing up__”Amber chuckles and then continues her romantic history.

“We argued about it and he had asked me where I came from,I had followed my father to visit his friend for the first time,but I didn’t tell him that,I had told him I came from the sky__”She chuckles again.She finds joy in telling her love life.She continues telling Helena about the history made with Edward and of course she left out the private part.

“I shouldn’t bore you with my blab,we should head back to the house”Amber said when she realized time had gone.

“I was not bored in fact it made my day”Helena chuckles.She wasn’t sure if she should be supporting another woman of her love to her own husband though she does not feel like his wife.

They returned to the house.Amber leaves Helena alone to tend to her children and Helena has nothing else to do than to go lock herself back in her room.

Arnold received a letter of his urgent presence in his home.He doesn’t have another choice than to prepare to leave his father’s mansion in the hands of his brother again and also he wouldn’t dare to leave his lovely wife with his brother,he fears the unspeakable might happen.He had no choice but to prepare for their leave in the next day.

It was in the evening,around 5pm,he went to his room and meets his wife jotting down on a book like she used to.Amber knew he had came into the room but she feigned ignorance.

“Was your day interesting enough to jot it down”Arnold said from her back.He kept a distance from her,watching her carefully choosing words to write.Amber didn’t respond so he walks closer to her.

He lays his hands and both of her shoulders and begins to message them.Amber stops writing and then moves his hand away from her shoulder.Arnold does that again but Amber did the same thing back.Arnold is angry with his wife’s attitude towards him,he brought up her chin so she could face him.

“Am not going to tolerate that now Amber,I want peace with you but it seems you like me being cruel”Arnold said.Amber tries to shake away his hand but she couldn’t.

“Your stubbornness makes me like you more and it makes me want you every time”Amber knew what he wanted right then.Arnold snapped away the book Amber’s hand,he throws it on the floor,pushing Amber on the bed.

“Let’s not do this now”Amber pleaded.

“I was trying to be gentle Amber it seems you don’t like that side of me”He said and turns her back to him.He held her with his grip and at the same time trying to uncover the layers of her clothes.He got off her underwear and then made his move to unloose his trousers button.

After he had freed himself,he thrusts into her open hole.Amber tries not to make any sounds as she wouldn’t want anyone to hear them.He still held her while thrusting into her.He had always loved it,taking her anywhere he wanted.He goes in a faster pace as he quietly moans.After some minutes,he c*m in her.He laughs as he was satisfied.Amber didn’t cry,she had gotten used to it,their unpleasant love making.She lays still without moving,her heart rapidly beating.Only if it had been with Edward would she feel pleasure but Arnold had robbed her of that.He had robbed her of everything she had wanted for herself since she was a child.With that,she hates him with the passing seconds.