Shadow on the Window

"I dream of things I've never seen/The sunlight doesn't wait for me now/My demons, they walk with me/They tell me that I let you down" - I Still Know You, Jacob Lee The entire table was messed up and layered in dust, the breeze was a bit too wild today to scatter every page all over the table.  I kept the coffee mug on the table finding a little square among all my mess and sat on the chair next to the table. The entire Manhattan was all lit up out of my window, ready to stay up all night.  It has been a few days that insomnia has engulfed me, I can't seem to sleep at nights.  It's been almost two and a half years I moved in into this city. The habit of staying up all night, binge watching series has been long gone after I moved out of India, because America wakes up and wraps up her day really early. Schools, universities, even my office starts at 8 in the morning, so I go to my dreamland under my cozy blanket at 10 PM. But I stay awake quite late on Fridays and Saturdays so that I can sleep till late in the perfect Sunday morning.  Since past one week, I have not been able to sleep at all, almost every night I wake up sweating out of weird dreams, still in sleep paralysis, choking my throat like I'm in a desert. So, I decided to engage myself today, if cleaning up could help me get diverted and get some sleep.  I had just made some coffee to accompany me while I cleaned up my study table which had already been a mess; and a wind howled up and blew up over my face. I didn't notice I was tracing shapes on my table in the layered dust while my mind was wandering around the world. I sat up not wasting one more minute, suddenly having a Déjà vu and feeling someone standing out in the balcony.