I'M NOT INTO YOU

It’s 8pm and I’m still here in the library, preparing for the upcoming exams. I know it’s a little late, but I hate disappointing my dad as he was always disappointed in everything that I do, I’m always second in everything. Like when I was 6 I was second in this cooking competition, dad scolded me. Second place in a spelling bee, got a scolding from him. And being second in swimming when I was 15, got scolded. I got used to it, but it always hurts, especially if its from your parents. I need to make him proud just once in my life, that’s all I need. And the fact that I’m his only child just makes it worse, as I’m supposed to run the family business. My mother died when I was 12 from a virus, and I got so traumatized that I became an introvert, and I was never an introvert, and most of all I used to have friends, but when my mom died we became distant. But I’m kinda glad they left me, because if they didn’t I probably wouldn’t focus on anything. Grades are no problem for me to be honest as I’m always top one, but my goal here is to be a valedictorian, and I’m sure my dad would praise me for that. I hope.. “Miss we’re about to close.” The librarian said calmly, interrupting me and my thoughts and my reading, “Oh, ok.” I said smiling at her as I put my books in my bag. I left the library with a long blue face not in the mood to be entertained by anyone as all I wanted was sleep, right there, right now. Once I got home I was greeted by one of our maids, “Where have you been Delilah?! Your lucky that your father isn’t here, he would be screaming at you by now.” I groan at what she stated but it was true, he would be furious if he saw me just coming home at this hour, but luckily he was in a business trip so no scolding from him today. “I know that, but I was just in the library studying.” I said shrugging with a emotionless face, the maid sighed as she puts her palm on her forehead definitely exhausted with me. “Well did you eat dinner?” I didn’t answer making her sigh once again. “I’ll just cook you up some mash potatoes and pork chops hm?” I nodded with a small smile plastered on my face. Time check – 11 : 45 It was almost 12am and I’m still awake giggling my butt off, I found this website where you can talk to strangers a month ago and I’ve been talking to this guy named chickentenders we don’t use our real names because we aren’t allowed to, wondering what my name is? Its deadflowersbloom pretty cringy but its alright. I’ve been talking to him for 2 weeks now and I’m so surprised how we haven’t loose contact. Because some people I’ve talked to would I guess ghost me? Like by talking on the first day we wouldn’t be talking anymore for the next two days. And once we don’t talk we wouldn’t be talking anymore. But I hope this guy stays with me, I love ranting my problems to strangers, its like they understand my problems more than the people that are actually in front of me. And I know I said that I’ll just get distracted by them, but I was just surprised that this guy stayed. Anyways, our topic of tonight was about our favorite songs, as I said Taylor swift and NIKI as for him it’s The Weeknd and Tyler the creator. Good taste I would say. We’ve been talking for an hour now and I can never get tired of this guy to be honest. I then checked the time and saw that it was 12 : 22, We said our goodbyes and I set my alarm at 7am and tucked myself into bed. At school ; Thursday ; 7 : 02 My alarm has been ringing for 1 minute now and I was getting annoyed by the minute, I turned it off and got that morning stretch. I got up and went to freshen up in the bathroom before going down to eat breakfast. I went back to my room and picked out an outfit. I picked out a white nude turtle neck and paired it with a beige like coat and a short tube checkered yellow nude colored skirt and a pair of black ankle boots. I grabbed my bag full of books and went to school. I got out of the car and took a deep breath before going in, I was greeted by the smell of the mixed perfumes that the students were wearing and the chit chatting of them. I went straight to my locker and put all my books that I wasn’t in-used yet. I got my phone out and started scrolling on i********: catching up on the people I follow before the bell rang for our first period. I then heard a few girls squealing signaling that the heartthrobs are here. I rolled my eyes and tried to ignore the shouting. I glanced at them as I heard their voice getting closer here. I saw Adrien Harris one of his friends and his probably the funniest one in their friend group also known as the class clown, he has these beautiful green eyes that really stands out and beautiful blonde locks, and next to him was a cold stern guy named Cole Jackson, but CJ for short, his dark brown hair was always so shiny and his pale skin really made him attractive to me. And lastly the one that probably is the most charming from all of them was non other than Axel Wood and his the guy that everyone fears in this school, He gets into a lot of fights and is definitely troublesome. And as they are friend’s they have something big in common which is making ladies fall weak on their knees for them. And that’s all I know about them. Probably the highlight of their friendship. I got to caught up in my thoughts that I didn’t even realized that the bell already rang and all of the people left to get to their class. And the only people that were in the used to be crowded hallway was me and mister Axel Wood, he was waiting for someone and I don’t know who, but why bother care? I then saw him look up at me and I turned around feeling embarrassed, I closed my eyes shut cursing at myself. I heard footsteps getting closer to me and someone coughed, “Hey Turner” I turned around slowly meeting his Dark brown hooded eyes, “Need...something?” He looks at me head to toe and noticed something, “I see you still have that stupid bear bracelet my brother gave you.” He said chuckling. His family and mine are really close that my dd or his dad would invite each other for dinner in the weekends, I used to have a crush on his older brother Ezekiel since 3rd grade but I grew out of it. And how I got this teddy bear bracelet was when my mom died, he gave it to me as he said that the bracelet is protection and that my mom is inside the teddy. I tilted my head, “And what’s wrong with keeping it?” He steps closer to me, and I step back hitting my locker, “That means your still crushing on him” He winks us not taking our eyes off each other, “Axel!!” A girl shouted he signaled her to wait and looked back at me, “My dad wants to invite you to dinner later tonight since he knows your dad is on a business trip, so I’ll pick you up at about 5pm ok?” He said patting my head. I nod and he smiles, “See you soon sweet cheeks!” He shouted as he puts an arm around the girl that was waiting for him. I rolled my eyes and went off to class. Time check – 4 : 33 pm I dressed up in a light blue plaid long sleeve and a white tank top under it, and some high waisted shorts, I didn’t go all overdressed as I’ve been to their house a lot of times, and it’s probably my second home. But I haven’t been to their house for 3 months now since everyone has been busy lately. I’m probably known as Axel’s sister from another mother, but its not really like that. Since I’ve known him he has always bullied me and teased me of every single step or breath I take in this world, but once I turned 16 he started to be all flirty with me. And trust me I was fed up by it. I looked at the mirror as my straight dark brown hair was a little bit messy, I got a comb and brushed my hair thoroughly, I looked at my almond eyes and down to my body structure feeling all insecure of how I look. I’m not that curvy nor I was fat, and I wouldn’t say I’m pretty or ugly. I was just…average. An average girl…and will forever be average. I flinched hearing a familiar voice calling for me, I went downstairs seeing Axel looking around seeing how some of the furniture changed. He then noticed my presence and put his hands inside his pockets, fully checking me out. I rolled my eyes and walked down, meeting him still staring at me. I furrowed my eyebrows. “You done?” I asked as he wasn’t really finished. But once he was, he looked into my eyes, “Not really but I don’t want my family to keep us waiting.” He winked making me scoff. Time check - 5: 57pm We arrived at the Wood residence and I stepped in there smelling food of sorts, I suddenly felt someone’s hand on my waist, I looked to see Axel taking a deep breath and looking at me, “Welcome back Turner” He smiles at me as I smile back, he then brought me over to his mother where I found her cooking up pasta. “Mom, guess who’s-” He was cut off by his mom shouting my name as she hugged me with excitement, “It’s been what? A decade since I saw you!!” She said with a big smile as I laugh. “I missed you Tiffany!” I said hugging her back, we both tried catching up but then we stopped talking and looked at his son coughing to catch our attention, “I’ll be going now.” He said kissing his mom on the cheek and got the keys to his car. “Where is he going?” I asked looking all curious as I heard Tiffany sigh shaking her head, her lips pursed, “He’s probably going to some party.” She said letting go of our hug and continued to cook, “Hey, why don’t you call down Ezekiel, since dinner is almost ready, and I think he would be excited to see you again.” She said still focused on the pasta, I nodded and headed upstairs to where his room was, passing by some family pictures and some pictures of us when we were kids. I smiled looking at all of them, forgetting that I was supposed to go to Ezekiel’s room. “Hey Lilah.” Someone greeted me, I bit my lip knowing who it was and turned around meeting his gorgeous dark brown eyes, his fluffy hair covering a bit of his eyes, his tall figure hovering over mine. I then just remembered how obsessed I was before, and not just his looks made him so beautiful. He was caring, sophisticated, responsible and down to earth. Unlike his jerky brother that’s always trying to get into fights. “Zeik!” I hugged him tightly making him chuckle, he lifted me up in the air making me shout a little, as I slap his back a couple times for him to put me down. He finally puts me down and made eye contact, “I missed you…”He whispered I smiled lightly and caressed his shoulder and leaned into his ear, “I don’t” I giggled making him push me a little, kind of disappointed at what I said. “Come on, your mom said dinner’s almost ready.” We both went downstairs seeing that his dad Mike was there being all clingy with Tiffany. I smiled at the sight, but then remembered how dad used to be like that with mom. I shook my head and went to the dinning room to eat. “So, Lilah, anything new in your life?” Mike asks, I looked up at him, putting down my utensils to talk. “Nothing new at all, everyday seems the same to me, to be honest.” I then glanced at Ezekiel devouring the food his mom made, “Well, your father said that you will be running his family’s business. Are you up or it?” I nodded clearly uncomfortable with the topic, I never wanted to run this family business of his, as it wasn’t my dream job, nor I want it to be. I wanted to be a photographer, to take pictures for the people who wants to keep their happiest times in a frame, to picture the beautiful views of each town I go to and probably post it online or something. I told my dad about it, and of course he did not approve of this, he said it won’t be successful and my life will just go down hill if I go through it. I hate my dad as much as I hate my life, sick of how my future will be planned by him. Time check- 7 : 35 We’re done eating right now I’m helping Tiffany with the dishes. “You know, you should just sleep here for the night, I mean it’s getting pretty late, and there’s no one in your house but you.” She suggested but I shook my head, “No, its fine…” She looks up at me and put her hand over mine, “I insist! And plus the guest room is officially redecorated, and I need someone to test it out.” She nudged my shoulder making me laugh. A few minutes later I was relaxing at the rooftop, embracing the cold wind as it hits my skin, I sighed in relief, It’s like I haven’t feel this calm in 10 years. I heard the door open seeing Ezekiel with two hot chocolate drinks in both his hands, handing me one. I took a sip as he sits beside me, he then gasps and I got confused, “What?” He held my hand shaking my hand around pointing at the bracelet, and I chuckled, “You still have this?!” I nodded smiling, “How come I didn’t notice this earlier?!” I shrugged my eyebrows furrowed, “I don’t know, too blind I guess?” His smile disappeared and glared at me, I laughed a little. Then it went silent, the only thing audible was the crickets and some cars passing by. I noticed from the corner of my eye he was looking at me, my heart beating fast, I looked down fidgeting with the cup of hot chocolate in my hands. “Do you…” I looked up at him, waiting for him to finish his sentence. “Do you still like me?” I didn’t say anything, it’s like the world just stopped, he waited for me to answer. I opened my mouth about to answer his question until a hiccup came out, I covered my mouth with my hand. I shook my head as a no, hiccups not stopping. He then looks at the bracelet and back at me. *4 years ago* I sat there In the part eyeing him as he plays with his brother axel. I held the box in my hand tightly scared of what’s gonna happen next. I took a deep breath and walked towards him. I tapped his shoulder and once he turned around I knew there’s no turning back. I aggressively gave him the box, and he opened it seeing chocolates of different varieties, and a piece of paper saying ‘I like you’ my heart was already pounding and he was just standing there shocked and all. He looked up at me and bit his lip before saying… “Sorry, but I don’t feel the same way” He gave the box back and I hang my head low. Axel saw and looked inside the box, he then laughed. “Aww, you got rejected?” I glared at him and pushed him away from me, he was still laughing, “Shut up!!” I walked away tears falling from my face, Axel’s laugh still heard from afar, gosh I hate him so much. I was embarrassed, hurt, afraid to face him again, and upset with myself for doing this stupid confession. *Present* He sighed, and hearing it, it’s like he was relieved that I said no. He stood up and got my empty cup, “I’ll just put these in the sink, be right back” I smiled a little and nodded. Once he left I took a look at the bracelet and bit my lip before taking it off. If I wear this bracelet he would think I still like him, I sighed and threw it off the roof, finally saying goodbye to it, if that’s what it takes for him to think that I don’t like him anymore. “Ow!” My eyes widens, I looked to see a girl rubbing her head and Axel looked up seeing me, I saw his eyes definitely furious with me, my bracelet on the ground beside the girl he was with. He then mouthed, ‘I’m gonna kill you.'