Peace, Love and Psychology

*Last Year* I really should pay attention to what Joseph is saying, but I keep flashing back to last night. Joseph is concerned that his girlfriend is going to cheat on him again with someone else here in the program. I hate to tell him, but I just saw her making out on the grounds with some long-haired guy as I was driving in. Joe is 17, and just like other kids in this program, troubled. He comes from, not only a broken home, but an abusive one as well. What can I say to make any of this better? Especially since I just caught my live-in boyfriend, excuse me…fiancé, cheating on me last night! I have no clue if he thought that I’d be home later, or if he just wanted to get caught. I need to get out of here and deal with this mess. “Em”, Joe says, snapping me out of my reverie. I shift my focus to the present with Joe. “I’m so sorry, Joe. I’m really unfocused today.” I shake my head in frustration. “Do you want to talk about it?” He asks. I laugh out loud. “I’m supposed to be helping you, not the other way around.” He shrugs. “Maybe it’ll help me get my mind off of Lisa.” “Counselor’s are interesting people, you know? I mean, we feel that we have the right answers and tell you what we think would be the best course of action for you. It’s honestly up to you to take our advice or not. We’re just people looking at things objectively. Actions have consequences; some positive, some negative. But they are your decisions, your actions. Your accountability.” He nods. So I continue, “I don’t date a lot. It’s not something I talk about. I’m a private person overall.” He nods again. “But aren’t you living with someone? I thought I heard that.” I nod. “Yeah, I was. But, I have to find another place to live.” His eyebrows shoot up. I turn my eyes to focus on the wall behind him and take a deep breath. “Last night, I caught my boyfriend having a threesome with a man and a woman.” Joe jumps out of his chair and yells, “Holy s**t!!” I force a smile and say, “Yeah, that was my reaction too.” He takes his seat again and asks, “So what did you do?” “Well, I calmly walked to my room and packed a bag, gathered my dog and his things and went to a hotel last night.” He nods. “I would have too. I mean, I’m only 17, but if I had a job and that happened, I wouldn’t want to be there either.” “Exactly.” I nod at him. “So what’s next?” I pause and think about it, before answering, “Well, I think I’m going to stay at my aunt’s place for a while. I have to go pick up Marty from doggie daycare.” He smiles, “I didn’t know you had a dog.” I smile back before getting my phone and pulling up a picture of Marty to show him. “He’s really friendly, except not to Jon.” Joe snickers. “Apparently dogs are good judges of character,” he says while looking at the pic. “”He’s really cute.” He says, passing the phone back to me. I roll my eyes, “He knows.” I pause before adding, “So yeah, I can’t stay there anymore.” “I don’t blame you.” He shrugs. “So, as counselors, we may appear to look like we have out s**t together, but, we’re human, just like you. I promise you that most of us have train-wreck lives.” He smiles for a moment, studying me. “I should break up with Lisa.” He finally says. “Do you want to?” “I feel like I need to.” “Why do you think so?” I ask. “Because she doesn’t want to stop making out with random guys in the program! And I’m pretty sure she’s sleeping with some of them too.” He drops his head in his hands. “Honestly Joe, I think it’s for the best.” I say, pursing my lips. His head jerks up and he asks, “What?” Tilting his head, trying to figure it out. “I, um…I saw her outside while I was driving in…” “Ok?” He looks confused. I just keep looking at him until he gets it. “I’m so sorry, Joe.” His voice is muffled as he speaks, “Will it always be this way?” I can hear him sniffling. “Why am I not good enough? My parents, girls I’ve dated, now Lisa.” His shoulders start shaking. “I promise that it’s not you.” “It certainly f*****g feels like it.” He yells loudly and I hear a loud sob. It’s taking everything in me not to comfort him. “One day, none of this s**t will matter. You will find your person and you’ll find people who genuinely care about you. I promise you that.” He lifts his head to look at me. He bites his lip. “Do you want to say something else?” I ask softly. “Can I ask for something?” “It depends.” I quirk my eyebrows. He lets out a laugh as a tear rolls down his cheek. I nod, “Go ahead and ask.” “Can I have a hug?” I immediately stand up and put my things in my chair, and hold open my arms. He jumps up and dives into my embrace, sobs coming from him. This poor kid. I squeeze him tight. I hear a knock on my door and I tell whoever it is to enter. My boss, Mr. Rydell, sees me embracing the sobbing boy and shuts the door and quickly walks over, putting his arms around both of us. I mouth the words “Thank you” to him. He just smiles at me. Joe’s sobs eventually die down and he starts wiping his eyes and he looks up to notice my boss. His eyes become huge. “Ssssorry Mr. Rydell…I don’t know what came over me.” He says, hiccuping. Mr. Rydell gives a soft smile, “It’s ok Joe. Sometimes we all need a good cry.” Joe hiccups again, “It’s been ssoooo long since I hugged anyone.” He sniffles again. “I kinda lost it.” He shrugs. Mr. Rydell just smiles, “Well, Em does give good hugs.” “She’s like the big sister I never had.” He gives me a big smile, wiping his eyes. My mouth opens with a part. I had no idea he felt like that. I gaze up at my boss and notice how huge his eyes are. After I minute, Mr. Rydell clears his throat and says, “So, I just came in here, Em, to let you know that you have a visitor.” My eyebrows shoot up. “I do? Who?” Literally no one visits me when I’m at work. “Your boyfriend, Jonathan?” He says with a smile. My face must register shock. I glance at Joe and see his scowl. Mr. Rydell’s smile falls as he sees Joe’s face. A knot forms in my stomach and I loosen my hold on Joe. I shake my head at him.