The World Where She Fits

TWWSF 1: Back to CAU

Shandra POV

(I'll use this name again since she's out in the Palace. Don't be confused.)

One week had passed after the night where I feel like I died. The engagement night of the guy I love so much. Chase engagement with a girl named Hilary Breena Lee. I don't have any idea what kind of person she is but I do know where she came from and what her family is. Mr. Cane already briefed me about her before I decided to show up at their engagement party.

Sa loob ng isang linggo ay wala akong ginawa kundi ang magmukmok sa bahay at ninamnam ang sakit. Hindi ako lumabas at hindi tumanggap ng bisita, kahit ang mga kaibigan ko. Nagkulong lang ako sa kwarto buong araw. Kahit si Zander ay hindi ko hinaharap maliban na lang kung sapilitin siyang pumasok ng kwarto ko.

But I promised myself to stop after a week of heartbreak and sadness. So now, it's time to face the cruel world again. I'm done wallowing my sorrow and pain because of my lost love. I have to go on living for the sake of my family, friends, myself, and for him. I don't want to add the pain he's suffering at the moment. Isolating myself from my friends and others will just make him worried and hurt.

"What?" I snapped at Zander when he looks at me with a smirk. Naabutan ko siyang kumakain ng almusal sa dining room ng mag-isa. I sit down in front of him to join him in breakfast.

"Done with your self-pity, eh?" He asks in a mocking tone. He put down his spoon and fork and look at me directly.

"Don't mock at me!" I glared at him. "Is it wrong to give in with sadness and allow yourself to think things?"

"Nope," he sighs, at nagpatuloy sa nagtatampong boses, "but you made me worried Shan. You wouldn't even talk to me."

"I'm sorry, Zan. I just wanted to give time to myself. Hinahanda ko rin ang sarili ko sa pagharap sa kanya at sa fiancee niya," ibinulong ko na lang ang huling sinabi ko. Hindi ko pa rin matanggap na may ibang babae na sa buhay ni Chase. Na higit na may karapatan sa kanya kaysa sa akin, no, sa aming kaibigan niya.

Zander stands up and walks behind me. He slips his arms in my shoulder and hugs me from the back. He kisses my hair and settled his chin in my head.

"I'm just here, Shan, don't forget about that," he said in a very soft and loving voice.

My eyes started to water with his action. I hold his arm, look up to him, and smile, "I know Zan, I know."

He wipes the single tear that roll down in my face. Hinalikan niya ako sa noo bago kumalas sa pagkakayakap sa akin at bumalik sa kinauupuan niya sa harap ko. Nakangiti naming ipinagpatuloy ang pagkain ng almusal.

"Want me to drive you to CAU?" He asks after a little while.

"Nah, I'll be using White Shadow," I replied without looking at him.

"Huh? You will show up as SF?" He asks and I nodded. "Why not use Black Umbra then?"

"The rest of the BA are not aware that I decided to show up today. We only use our official motorbikes when we are complete and together. Plus, the fact that Yana is not here as well as Heero."

"Yeah, I forgot about that," he gives me a sheepish smile.

"You don't have class today?" Kunot-noong tanong ko ng mapagtanto ko ang sinabi niya na ipagmaneho niya ako.

"I do but I have an important thing to settle in one of our business here. Don't worry, I already informed my Prof."

"I see. Just let me know if I can be of help," faint smile form in my lips as he nodded in response.

Naunang umalis sa akin si Zander pagkatapos ng agahan. Dadaan siya sa saglit sa GSU bago pumunta sa dapat niyang puntahan. Tinungo ko ang garahe pagkaalis niya. Maingat kong tinanggal ang takip ni White Shadow. Nakangiting pinaglandas ko ang aking kamay sa manibela patungo sa upuan.

"It's been more than a year, White Shadow. Damn! I miss riding you as well as Green Flare and Black Umbra. You three are very precious to me," I whispered to my motorbike.

Inilabas ko siya ng garahe at dinala sa may front door. Tinakbo ko ang kwarto para magbihis. I'm excited to ride White Shadow again.

Hinalungkat ko ang closet at hinanap ang mga damit na kadalasan sinusuot ko bilang SF. Black jeans, white fitted shirt, black jacket with BA's insignia and white rubber shoes. Kinuha ko ang gwantes na labas ang mga daliri sa dulo ng closet at isinuot. Pagkatapos magbihis ay bumaba na kaagad ako.

I positioned myself in the back of my motorbike, press the key, and start the engine. Isinuot ko ang black sunglasses at ang white helmet saka pinatakbo si White Shadow. The gate automatically opens when I approach. Pagkalampas ng gate ay pinatakbo ko ng mabilis ang motorbike.

Nagmenor ako saglit para tingnan ang oras sa suot kong relo. I still have an hour before class started. It won't hurt if I take a detour before I proceed to school. Pinili ko ang daan na maglalayo sa akin sa CAU para medyo matagalan akong makarating. I love the feeling every time I am riding my motorbike. It feels like I am free, from everything. The whistling air that freely touches my skin is relaxing as if soothing my whole body.

After almost forty-five minutes of taking a detour I decided to go to school. Tumigil ako sandali ng abot tanaw ko na ang gate. I can't help but sigh and be nervous. I may not be afraid of fighting someone to death, no, scratch that, not afraid to kill rather, but I admit I am nervous facing Chase and his fiancée. I still don't know how to react in case I saw them. It's a good thing though that I am taking Business Management before I leave for Japan last year. I will just continue my Business Management course. I already talked to the Dean of the school as a sign of respect. Technically, I am the owner of the school so they can't stop me if I wanted to go back with my studies.

On the other hand, Chase is taking up Civil Engineering, though I don't have any idea what course is his fiancee. All I know is that they enrolled her in CAU. The Engineering Department is a bit far from ours. Kaya magagawa ko siyang iwasan kung gugustuhin ko. But why should I? Kung alam ko naman na at the end of the day magkikita at magkikita pa rin kami. Kung hindi man sa school, sa lugar na alam kung hindi ko siya maiiwasan. We have the same friends, our group are both members of GSU and he is also part of DC Org, as his respective parent's heir.

I heave a deep sigh and started my motorbike again, towards the gate. The Royal Guards bowed to me as a greeting. They instantly recognized me, it's because they are now aware that I am also SF. Tumango lamang ako sa kanila at dumiretso na sa parking lot.

Napansin ko ang pagsunod ng tingin ng mga estudyante na nasa front ground ng school. Hindi pa nagsisimula ang klase kaya marami pa ang nakatambay sa labas. At ang parking lot na para sa akin malapit lang din sa gate. Katabi nito ang parking lot na para sa mga kaibigan ko. I begged my brother for that set up when I was in freshman. I used to park mine with my friends but I don't have to do that now. Most of the students who was here almost two months ago knew who I am. That I am not just a well-known gangster but also the Princess of Daichi, the granddaughter of the King of Daichi who owns this school, and that makes me one of his heirs.

Bumagsak ang buhok ko sa balikat ng tanggalin ko ang helmet. I locked the helmet in my motorbike and so is he. May tiwala ako sa mga Royal Guard pero ayokong maging kampante. Ang isa sa pinakaayaw ko ay ang pinapakialaman ang pinakamamahal kung motorbike.

I was taking off my gloves on my way to where the Business Management building is. I didn't care about the curious look given to me by most of the students I passed by. I can hear murmured and whispers everywhere but I never give a damn! All of the students who knew me and witness what I did almost two months ago were asked by Captain Tsukane to keep silent. But I know I can't stop the rumor to spread especially if they know about me and Chase. They are all aware that Chase is now engaged and I am back. They might be anticipating something to happen.

"Oh, s**t!" I cursed when someone tackled me to the ground. "What the heck are you doing? Get off me, Ember!"

Ember gives me a nervous laugh, "I'm sorry, Shan. I just can't help it when I saw you walking there. You finally showed up. I'm so happy."

"Tch! You don't have to tackle me, you know," I frowned at her.

"We just miss you, Shan," Haven answered while hugging me tightly from the back.

"Let go, Ve! I ca-can't b-b-breath," I said trying to free myself from her tight embrace. "Jeez! Balak niyo ba akong bugbugin?" Wika ko ng makawala sa kanilang dalawa at naghahabol ng hininga habang tumawa lang ang sila. "Malapit ng umpisa ang klase bakit nandito pa kayo sa labas?" Tanong ko.

"I heard na dumating daw si SF," Ember draw a two quotation marks in the air when she said the word SF. "There's only one SF I know. Kaya nagmamadali akong pumunta dito sa front ground to check kung talagang ikaw nga yung sinasabi nila."

"May pakpak talaga ang balita. Imagine? Nakarating agad sa Tourism and HRM Department," I said in a mocking tone.

Ngumiti lang ng matamis sa akin ang dalawa kaya napabuntong-hininga na lang ako. They both grab my hands and drag me to somewhere I don't know.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing, you two? Saan niyo ba ako balak dalhin?"

"You owe us an explanation, Shan," Haven said with a serious look on her face.

"And a story of your adventures in the Palace," Ember added with a playful glint in her eyes.

"Seriously? Ngayon talaga?" They both nodded in response. "Mag-uumpisa na ang klase. You don't have a plan to skip, right? Cause I don't."

"Pero Shan, isang linggo mo kaming pinagtaguan," reklamo ni Ember.

"Promise us, you will tell us everything," Haven looks at me intently.

"Fine, I promise," I groaned.

"Okay, we have to attend our classes now," Haven started walking to the direction of the HRM Department while Ember growled and stomp her feet like a child. She doesn't have a choice but to attend her class too.

"Bye Shan. Meet us at the cafeteria on lunch, with the others," Ember said.

I slowly nodded my head in approval. "Yeah, with the others," I murmured. When Ember said 'with the others' it means Chase will also be there. Well, I just have to cross the bridge when I get there.

I sigh and started to walk towards the Business Management Building in a slow pace. For the first time I didn't care if I will be late on my first day.

I excuse the Prof when I came into the class. Instead of scolding me for being late on my first day, she bowed a little and ushered me to an empty seat. I just roll my eyes, not glad about the treatment I received. I hate it when it was so obvious that a certain someone wanted to impress me. As much as I hated being treated as different from the others. They should treat me like how they treat others, with fairness and equally. Though it might be impossible, for discrimination is still very much alive here.

Nagmamadali akong maglakad patungo ng cafeteria pagkatapos ng ilang boring na subjects. Agad gumigilid ang mga nadadaanan ko at bahagyang yumuyuko. Para bang takot sila na masanggi ko ng kahit mahina.

What the heck is happening?

Napakunot-noo ako sa nangyayari kaya tumigil ako at hinarap ang isang grupo ng estudyante. "Why are you stepping aside?" I ask in a fair voice.

"Ahmm.." Napataas ako ng kilay ng hindi nila alam kung paano sagutin ang tanong ko.

"Never mind!" I snapped at them and walk. Wala akong panahon upang pagtuunan ng pansin ang mga walang kwentang bagay. So what kung iniiwasan man ako ng lahat?

Madilim ang mukha sa pagkaka-asar na pumasok ako ng cafeteria. Inilibot ko ang paningin upang hanapin sina Haven at Ember. I found them in our old seat. Naglakad ako patungo sa kanila habang nakatutok sa akin ang mga mata ng halos lahat. Pero kapag titingnan ko sila ay agad na umiiwas ng tingin.

"Hey!" I greeted the two and slumped down in my old seat.

Haven cleared her throat and look at me apologetically. "Ahm, Shan I understand that you're not totally fine with what happened last week. And that seat is beside Chase and his fiancee should be sitting there."

"So?" I raised my brows and scoff. "Do I need to take another seat just because this seat is occupied by Chase's fiancée? And why should I do that?"

"Pero Shan, ----"

I cut off Ember. "No! Why do I have to give up my seat just because it's beside the seat that Chase?" I ask raising my eyebrows.

"Oh, God!" Haven groaned.

"Let Chase find another seat with his fiancée. By the way, you're already friends with her?" I smiled in disbelief. I somehow felt betrayed.

"We're not. We're just civil with her. She's still Chase's fiancée, after all," mabilis na sagot ni Haven.

"Haven is right," Ember said. "We can't do about that fact, we like it or not."

Silence engulfs us for a moment until someone called my name.

"Shan!"

Napalingon ako sa tumawag sa akin. It's Laxus and Ace with Vash and Ash. Bago pa man ako makagalaw ay nakalapit na si Laxus. Itinayo niya ako sa upuan at niyakap ng mahigpit. Si Ace ay ganoon din ang ginawa bago hinayaan si Ash na yakapin ako. Sa bilis ng pangyayari ay hindi man lang ako nakapag-react.

Vash laughs at what the others did and embraces me not so tight. "They just missed you so much, Shan, we all do. Kaya ganun na lang sila kung makayakap."

I smiled at them, a genuine smile for the first time full of fondness with my friends. "I know."

"Welcome back, Shandra," they said in chorus.

I nodded and murmured, "yeah, I'm definitely back." Umupo na ulit ako sa upuan at pumwesto na din sila sa kanilang upuan. Masaya kaming nagkumustahin at nawaglit na sa isip ko ang dilemma nina Haven and Ember. Until someone speak that made everyone stop.

"Excuse me."

We turn to see who speaks. She's standing few steps away and looking at me intently with a blank expression.

"I think that's my seat," she continued.