First Heartbreak

Chapter Ten - Moving On

Zen's POV

It was my first heartbreak – I still had dreams about how she rejected me. Whenever I wake up from it, I'd be drenched in cold sweat. My mom told me, I would cry out loud in the middle of the night and she'd come quickly into my room to wake me up. The first few days were hard, I could barely get enough sleep; I had dark circles under my eyes.

I had to keep on waking up early to get to school, but I never came on time, I just couldn't bare to look at her. I know I should move on, I thought it was going to be easy, but I was wrong. It took me a good three or four months to finally get over her, well…sort of. In that process of moving on, I came across Melody.

She's five foot four, the same height as Sam, she has fair complexion as well. She's a baton twirler, and smelled like wild daisies. She's fun to be with, witty, and pretty talented at baton twirling I must say!

I asked her out one day, not the same way I asked Sam, with the entire letter and effort and all. I didn't say I didn't put that much effort in asking her out. I did, but it just wasn't the same as before. I often walked her home after school. In that one instance, I asked her if she wanted to go out on a date. Surprisingly, she said yes!

I think Melody changed how I felt for Sam. I didn't have those strong feelings for her as I once did. I would often study every other day at the library with her, so I could make up for the time I lost sulking over my heartbreak – she's a great tutor, by the way.

I once caught her talking to Sam at the library; she was helping Mel with her books that were scattered on the floor. When I entered the library, I wasn't surprised at all that Sam wasn't there anymore. She'd been keeping her distance away from me ever since, and so did I. Sigh. I didn't know what to say either quite frankly.

My relationship with Mel is doing great, I didn't even notice that it was already December, and that our Christmas party was just around the corner.

I got Mel a necklace with the initial of my name on it, she liked it of course! She got me a bracelet that has a baton for a pendant, if you could call it that way.

It's the first Christmas I'd ever had a girlfriend. We walked in the classroom hand-in-hand when I somewhat noticed Sam standing there but turned around to chat with Vanessa. I was sure she was looking at Mel, and me but maybe it was just all in my head.

The party went about the program, which I never really cared about since I was with Melody. Time seems to stop when I'm around her. We'd have endless conversations about anything under the sun. Laugh at almost anything we talk about!

"So, where would you be heading for Christmas break?” asked Mel.

"I don't know yet. Maybe I'll just stay at home while my family go to my grandparents’ house."

"You should go with them. Why would you do stay behind?” she asked.

"Well, it's quite simple. So I won't miss you that much!” I squeezed her hand.

"See? Now when you're like that I'm not sure whether or not to smile or laugh at you for being so cheesy", Mel teasingly answered while planting a kiss on my cheek.

I just smiled at her. The butterflies in my stomach just came out of nowhere every time she kisses me. I thought my friends were exaggerating the description about the "butterflies in your stomach", not until I finally felt it myself.

It was the end of the party when Melody was fetched by her mom. She gave me a feathered kiss on the lips before running towards her mom. I grinned like a fool obviously. Definitely had some butterflies flying out of my mouth right then and there.

I was helping clean up the mess and tidying stuff around when I noticed Vanessa entered the auditorium. One thing I learned though, wherever Vanessa was, you can be sure Sam's there too. So I did what any normal person would do, I followed Vanessa. And sure enough Sam was there, sitting by the tip of the stage; it's the same stage where I first saw her sing. Okay enough about that already, Zee! I reminded myself.

I sneaked at the backstage to eavesdrop at what they were talking about. You shouldn't be doing this, i***t!

"What are you doing here all alone?” asked Vanessa while approaching Sam from behind.

"Ah, I just wanted to be alone. I could think clearly here because it's quiet", answered Sam.

Vanessa sat down beside Sam and just rubbed her back, comforting her friend.

"There, there, Sammy girl," said Vanessa.

I couldn't hear the rest of what Vanessa had to say because some stupid kid was yelling nearby. I wanted to scream at the kid get away from here, you i***t! But of course, if I did that, then they'd catch me eavesdropping.

"Yes, I guess I probably should. I don’t even know where the heck all this feelings and emotions are coming from." Wait, what???

“Well, you know what they say, you’ll only learn to miss that one thing when it’s no longer within your reach,” I heard Vanessa replied. Hold on a second, pause for a moment and rewind. Sam said, what?

“You know you’re a terrible friend for saying that straight to my face, right, Ness?”

I could hear Vanessa chuckling in the background and somehow quickly changed the topic. "I'm gonna miss you though."

Wait! Rewind! I need a replay of whatever Sam said, I need to know if I heard it correctly! I wanted to shout so badly but I know that if I do, I’ll get caught and I’d be the bad guy for evesdropping.

"I'm gonna miss you though."

"Aww. I'm gonna miss you too, Ness!"

I listened to their conversation some more.

"And before you know it, we'll be graduating on this very stage in March."

Graduation. I almost forgot about that!

"Yeah. Graduation." It went quiet. For a second I thought they were creeping in on me so I had to pop my head out for a bit to see. But thank God the didn’t.

"Sammy girl, I'd love to stay with you but I've got some chores to do. Are you sure you're not heading home yet?” said Vanessa while she stood up.

And that was my queue to leave, otherwise they might really catch me!

"Yes I'll be fine. You better head home. You know how your dad gets when you come home late." Was the last thing I heard Sam said before I ran outside and acted as if I didn't hear anything nor was I anywhere near the auditorium.

I was heading out the gate when Vanessa came up to me.

"What are you still doing here Zen? Aren't you supposed to be with Melody?” she enquired.

"I'm going home. Melody was fetched by her mom so, I stayed for a bit and helped out," I answered. "Aren't you supposed to be with Sam or something?" I asked, I hope that wasn't too obvious.

She smiled rather hesitantly. "Sam didn't want to go home yet. She's at the auditorium".

"And why would you tell me that, Vanessa?” I sounded almost harshly.

"I don't know. I just thought you should know." She smiled coyly.

I opened my mouth to say something, but I couldn't think of anything to retort. "I gotta go Zen. But I know you already know that. Bye."

Before could react any further, Vanessa was already gone. Was it possible that she’s seen me going out of the auditorium earlier? Whatever. That didn't matter.