Philander: Hunter Dwyer

Chapter Twelve: One Jealous Beast

I stayed quiet, not uttering even just a single word. What happened awhile ago didn't registered in my mind still. I didn't speak and so was he. We journeyed to our destination with silence and awkwardness enveloping us.

Shit. What did really happen there? Goodness.

I asked for a punishment, I made the first move. That's what happened, so I don't have the right to be shy and be awkward around him after what happened. I did that so we could go back to the way we were.

I don't even know what crossed my mind, I just didn't want him to leave me alone like that. It felt... I don't know how to describe what I felt, I don't know the exact word to use, but one thing is for sure, I didn't like that feeling.

"C-can..." kinagat ko ang ibaba kong labi habang pinaglalaruan ang mga daliri sa taas ng hita, "can we turn on the radio?" Hindi man lang ako makatingin sa kaniya, hindi ko alam kung guni-guni ko lang ba na lumingon ito sa akin.

"Do whatever you want." I heard him inhaled and his tone he used seemed cold.

"Are you okay with that? I don't want to displeasure you again, I might break the rules again without realizing it." I replied honestly with my head down.

"I usually like a quiet vibe while driving...but if you want music, I'll give you permission to do as you pleas." His voice still seem so cold.

Pang-isa o dalawang araw lang ba ang pagiging mabuti niya sa akin? Ganoon ba 'yon? Sinanay niya lang ako sa ganoon niyang pakikitungo, ngayon ay parang hindi na ako sanay sa pagiging malamig niya.

Nagdabog ako pero siniguradong hindi iyon halata. Inis kong binuksan ang radyo, nabwisit lang ako nang dumagundong ang malakas na beat ng budots. Nilipat ko ito sa ibang estasyon at naghanap ng estasyon na may mabagal at malumanay na kanta ngunit hindi yata ngayon ang luck ko. Wala akong choice kundi patayin ito at magpakain na naman sa katahimikan.

I folded my arms over my chest and leaned back on the backrest of my seat. I set my eyes on the scene outside the window. Nagpakawala ako ng buntong hininga, sinandal ko ang ulo ko sa bintana at inuntog-untog ang noo ko duon ng mahina. Natigil lamang ako nang biglang tumugtog ang musikang may pamagat na Perfect by Ed Sheeran.

"I found a love for me

Darling, just dive right in

And follow my lead

I found a girl

Beautiful and sweet

I never knew you were that someone

Waiting for me."

Napabaling ako sa gawi niya, may kinakalikot siya sa cellphone niya. Sa tingin ko ay kinonek niya ang kaniyang cellphone sa sasakyan niya para makapaglagay ng musika. Masama ba kung isipin ko na ginawa niya iyon para sa akin?

Binaba niya ang cellphone niya pero hindi niya ako pinagtuunan ng pansin. Binaliwala niya lang ako, kahit isang sandaling pagsulyap man lang ay wala.

Dinilaan ko ang ibaba kong labi, pinipigilan ang ngiti na gustong mamuo sa labi ko.

How funny. He still wanted me to be comfortable even though he doesn't want to look at me at the moment. Just thinking that he did there made my heart skip in happiness.

The song was too good for me to not sing along. Nasa mood din ako, at dahil na rin siguro gusto kong pansinin niya ako.

I do have a good voice, hindi naman siguro masama kung i-show off ko 'yon 'diba?

'Baby, I'm dancing in the dark

With you between my arms

Barefoot on the grass

While listening to our favorite song

When you said you look a mess

I whispered underneath my breath

You heard it

Darling, you look perfect tonight."

I sang, closing my eyes and swaying my upper body sideways. I hummed along the instrumental part of the song while smiling.

"I wish I could sing along with you..."

Minulat ko ang mga mata, bumaling ako sa kaniya. Lumundag ang puso ko nang makitang nakatingin siya sa akin, mukha siyang seryoso sa gamit niyang ekspresyon.

"But I wasn't gifted with that talent. Boses palaka yata ako."

Kinagat ko ang ibaba kong labi para pigilan ang tawa ko. Hindi ko alam kung joke ba 'yon o totoo, basta na lang akong natawa dahil sa sinabi niya. Pagdating sa kaniya, ang babaw lang ng kaligayahan ko. Kapag nagbibiro siya, kahit hindi naman masyado katatawanan ay natatawa pa rin ako. Hindi rin iyon pilit.

His expression softened, his lips slightly tugged upwards until his smile turned into a chuckle. I laughed with him, napapailing dahil sa babaw ng kaligayahan namin. The next thing I knew is that we're talking. At first, we were still awkward but as time pass by, we began to talk normally and comfortably like before he punished me earlier by kissing and sucking my lips.

...

I feel trapped by ther gazes, looking like me as if they are going to eat me alive. Sa paraan ng pagtingin nila ay para bang may ginawa akong masama sa kanila. Nakakailang dahil kasama ko ang dalawang naggagwapuhang kalalakihan sa isang cottage. Nasa ibang cottage si Hunter at kasama niya duon si Frances na kakadating lang din, mukhang may importante silang pinag-uusapan.

I learned that Frances came here with her husband, which is one of the gentlemen in the cottage I'm included in.

"What's your relationship with Hunter?" Asked the guy with a green eyes and chocolate brown hair. He looked like a greek god, ang gwapo niya. Siya si Ahrlo Villareal, ang may ari ng sikat na islang ito. Nalaman ko rin na hindi lang pala ito ang isla na pagmamay-ari niya. He's rich just like my boss.

Nahihiya akong ngumiti. "Personal assistant lang naman po ako ni Mr. Dwyer."

Nagtaas ng kilay sa akin ang lalaking nagngangalang Dhenmer Ramos. Ang asawa ni Faith. At hindi ko alam kung bakit ganoon na lang ang pagtitig niya sa akin.

"Really, huh? Then why is he so possessive of you?" His voice matched his features and awra. It's so cold and intimidating. He's also very popular and well-known, his company makes delicious wines but I haven't tasted one yet. Frances told me that he's half spaniard, that explains why he looks like a foreigner.

"What do you mean he's possessive of me?" I asked, acting confused even though I already know why they asked that.

Before Hunter separated from our cottage with Frances, he threatened both gentlemen that if they touch me even just the tip of my hair, they'll regret it. I myself don't even know why he said that and what came into his head.

But why the heck do I found that sweet? I never think of possessiveness as a cute trait but with him? He sounded really hot while threatening his friend not to touch me.

"Come on, woman. We know that you know what we mean." Mr. Villareal smirked. "Baka biglang sumunod sa yapak ng kaibigan naming ito, si Dhenmer, who is so deeply in love with his wife." Tinapik ni Mr. Villareal ang balikat ni Mr. Ramos.

Fluent silang magtagalog kahit na mga mukha silang foreigner kagaya ni Hunter. Ang galing.

"Huwag mo 'kong hinahawakan." May pagbabanta sa boses ni Mr. Ramos at saka hinawi ang kamay ni Mr. Villareal paalis sa balikat niya. Binalik niya muli ang atensyon sa akin, ganoon pa rin ang paraan niya ng pagtingin. "At ikaw... Hunter is our friend, if you hurt him, I swear, I will forget that you're a woman and make your life f*****g miserable." Tinuro niya pa ng cottage kung saan naroon sila Hunter at Frances, wala sa sariling sinundan ko ang tinuturo niya.

I didn't understand why my heart ached when I saw the both of them laughing and looking comfortable with each other. Nakaupo sila sa upuan habang nakaakbay si Hunter kay Frances.

Nung una ko pa napapansin na masyado silang malapit sa isa't isa. He never laughed with me like how he laugh with Frances, I guess he's not that comfortable with me yet.

Pasimple kong sinapo ang dibdib ko at inikot-ikot ang palad ko rito.

Normal lang ba na maramdaman ko ito?

"That son of a b***h!" Mr. Ramos suddenly stood up from his seat, he stomped towards the direction where Hunter and Frances are. The next thing I knew is Mr. Ramos grabbing Hunter by the collar and punching him.

My eyes widened in shock. I was about to stand up and go to them to stop them from fighting but Mr. Villareal grabbed me by my arm to stop me.

"Don't worry, Miss PA. They do that a lot, Dhemer is a jealous type and he always gets jealous of Hunter since Hunter is very close to Frances. But they are still friends 'till now, aren't they? Nagba-bonding lang 'yan sila."

Kahit na may pag-aalangan ay sinunod ko na lang siya. Bumalik ako sa inuupuan ko habang nakamasid sa kabilang cottage. Ibabalik sana ni Hunter ang suntok ngunit pumagitna si Frances at mukhanf pinapagalitan ang dalawa.

"So, Miss Leir... You and Hunter, huh?"

Nakuha ni Mr. Villareal ang atensyon ko, napakagat labi ako at nag-iwas ng tingin.

"Don't be shy, it's obvious that you like him. I can already tell by the way you look at him." He said but I just lowered my head to hide the redness of my cheeks from shame. I felt him sit close to me, nag-angat ako ng tingin sa kaniya at nabigla kung gaano siya kalapit sa akin. "Did something happened before you came here?"

Napaka-tsismoso naman yata ng lalaking 'to?

Mas lalong namula ang pisnge ko, "w-wala." Hindi ko alam kung anong iniisip niya, pero alam ko naman ang katotohanan na wala namang may nangyari sa amin bago kami pumunta rito sa resort. Naghalikan lang naman kami ng medyo may pagkatagal...

Iyon lang naman.

No big deal. It was just a punishment.

"Are you sure?"

"A-ano. A-ano kasi eh..." umusog ako palayo sa kaniya.

Nag-angat ako ng tingin, hindi siya nakatingin sa akin kundi sa gawi nila Hunter. Nang mapansin niyang nakatitig ako sa kaniya ay binalik niya ang atensyon sa akin at ngumisi.

"He's looking." Aniya.

"H-huh?" Lilingonin ko na sana ng direkson nila Hunter subalit pinigilan ako ni Ahrlo sa pamamagitan ng paghawak sa panga ko at bahagyang nilapit ang mukha sa akin.

"Wanna test if he really likes you?" He asked with a genuine smile. And before I knew it, he we was already kissing my cheek.

Namula ang magkabilang pisnge ko dahil sa ginawa niya. Nahiya tuloy ako.

Marahan ko siyang tinulak palayo, hindi ko naman sineryoso ang ginawa niya dahil halata namang nambibiro lang siya. Hanggang sa may kamay na humawak sa braso ko at marahas akong hinila patayo.

Napaharap ako kay Hunter na nandidilim ang mga tsokolate niyang mga mata habang nakatingin sa akin, mahigpit din ang pagkakahawak niya sa braso ko.

"Hunter—"

Hindi niya man lang ako binigyan ng pagkakataon na makapagsalita, basta-basta niya lang kinuha ang bag ko at marahas akong hinila palayo. Hindi ko nagustuhan ang inakto niya, ngunit mas lamang ang kagustuhan kong magpaliwanag sa kaniya kahit na wala naman akong dapat ipagpaliwanag dito.

Bakit ba ako hihingi ng tawad? Para saan? Dahil hinayaan kong may humawak sa akin na ibang lalaki? Wala naman akong makitang dahilan kung bakit ganito siyang galit kundi iyon.

Dinala niya ako sa isang restroom, ang malala pa ay nasa panlalaki niya ako ipinasok, mabuti nalang ay walang tao rito. Sinarado niya ang pinto, humarap siya sa akin at pininid ako sa pader, ganoon na lang ang gulat ko nang biglaan niya akong halikan ng madiin sa labi.

Dahil sa gulat hindi kaagad ako nakakakilos. Nang tuluyang rumehistro sa utak ko ang nangyayari ay sinubukan ko siyang itulak, at dahil mas malakas siya sa akin at talagang pinagpipilitan niya ang sarili ay hindi ako nagtagumpay.

Gumalaw ang labi niya, imbis na mabastusan tulad nung kadalasan kong maramdaman tuwing biglaan niya akong hinahalikan ay tila nagugustuhan ko pa ito. Hindi ko alam kung dahil ba ito sa halikang pinagsaluhan namin o ano, ang alam ko lang ay gusto ko muling maramdaman ang mga nararamdaman ko tuwing hinahalikan niya ako.

And because of that, I found myself returning all his kisses. My movement was slow at first until I finally got the urge to simultaneously move my lips with his.

His hands crawl towards the back of my head, he grabbed a handful of my hair and deepened the kiss, opening his mouth wider and devouring my whole mouth almost. I heard myself moan inside his mouth, my hands gripping his shoulder. The kiss wasn't a stranger to me, it was rough like earlier when he punished me, ang kaibahan lang ay mas matindi ngayon.

My tummy fluttered in excitement, my heart was thumping fast that I couldn't even steady my breathings.

He grab my jaw, he then angled my head so that he could kiss me properly. Yet again, I moaned because of how delicious and good his lips are. It's not just his lips which is addictive but also the feelings and emotions that I'm feeling. The butterflies in my stomach, the shiver running down my spine and my fast beating heart.

I don't know how long the kiss last, all I know is that when our lips parted, we were both catching our breaths and our lips were both red from the sucking and lip biting. I'm pretty sure that my cheeks were burning in shame and embarrassment.

"Who kisses better?"

My brows furrowed in confusion. "What?"

"Who kisses better?" He repeated, his eyes were still cold and dark. I feel like if I look deeper into it, I might just get lost.

"A-ano bang pinagsasabi mo?"

"Who do you think kisses better? Ako or si Ahrlo?"

Umawang ang labi ko sa naging tanong niya, wala akong maalala na nakipaghalikan ako kay Mr. Villareal, talagang wala akong maalala dahil wala naman talagang nangyari na ganoon. Ang tanging naaalala ko lang ay ang paghalik niya sa akin sa pisnge, pagkatapos non ay biglang sumulpot si Hunter at walang sabi-sabi akong hinila palayo.

Nakita niya ba iyon? Was he in the wrong angle for him to think that? Either way, he should have known that I'm not that kind of a woman.

"Mr. Villareal...he just kissed me on the cheek, I don't even know why he did that." Kalmado kong sagot.

Bakit parang may tumutusok sa dibdib ko?

"f**k, that asshole!" He hissed, massaging the bridge of his nose. "I already f*****g warned them."

"Do you think of me like that, Hunter?" I asked, offended and hurt. I shouldn't be mad just because of this small matter, but I got insulted, my womanhood got insulted by him.

He looked at me, confused. "Like what?"

"Why did you think that? Does that kiss suppose to be a punishment...again?" Nag-iinit ang mga mata ko, konti na lang ay lalabas na ang mga luha mula rito.

"What do you mean, Sera?" He was really confused, not having a single idea that he just insulted me.

"Sa tingin mo ba talaga na makikipaghalikan ako sa kahit sino-sino na lang na lalaki? Lalo na sa bago ko pa lang na kakilala?" Tuluyang lumabas ang mga luha mula sa mata ko, pinahiran ko ito agad at malakas siyang tinulak. "Bakit mo naisip 'yon? Sigurado ako na parusa na naman 'yong halik na 'yon, parusa lang!"

"S-sera, hindi—"

"Gusto mo ba talang malaman kung sino mas magaling sa inyong dalawa makipaghalikan?" Mahina akong natawa dahil sa sarili kong tanong, suminghot ako at pinahiran ang natirang luha sa pisnge ko. "Susubukan kong alamin para sayo, tutal iyon naman ang tingin mo sa akin, na ganokng klase akong babae, hindi ba?"

He looked so hopeless while looking at me, he opened his mouth to say something but ended up closing it again. I couldn't count how many times his adams apples moved from swallowing. It's like he wanted to reason out with me but couldn't find the right words to say in his mouth. Or maybe...maybe I was just plain right, that he really did think of me that way.

Now, I don't wanna believe the regret and guilt I'm seeing in his eyes.

Umalis ako sa harap niya, binuksan ko ang pinto at lumabas ng restroom. Nakayakap ako sa sarili ko habang naglalakad palayo.

Ito ang dahilan kung bakit ayokong mahulog sa kaniya, dahil alam ko na kapag hinayaan kong mahulog ang puso ko sa kaniya ay masasaktan lang ako. Ano pa nga bang magagawa ko? Tuluyan na akong nahulog sa kaniya, inaamin ko nang may gusto na ako sa kaniya. Hindi naman ako masasaktan nang ganito kung wala akong nararamdaman para sa kaniya.

Pinatahan ko ang sarili ko, pinahiran ko ang mga luha sa pisnge ko at hinintay na bumalik sa normal na kulay ang namula kong ilong at pisnge dahil sa pag-iyak. Pagkatapos ay tumungo ako sa cottage kung saan naroon sila Frances.

"Hey, Sera! Have you seen Hunter? Ang sabi ni Ahrlo magkasama raw kayo? Hindi pa kami tapos mag-usap eh, heto kasing asawa ko ay napakaseloso. Sarap iwanan." Ang sabi ni Frances na may halong biro.

Pilit akong ngumiti, umupo ako sa bakanteng upuan which is sa tabi ni Mr. Villareal.

"Nag-cr lang." Tipid kong sagot.

"From what I saw, pumasok kayong dalawa sa isang restroom na magkasama." Ani Mr. Villareal sa tabi ko.

Nagkaroon ng konting katahimikan, naputol lamang iyon nang tumayo si Mr. Villareal at lumipat sa tabi ni Mr. Ramos habang si Frances naman ay lumipat sa tabi ko.

"Sera, tell me honestly. Are you okay?" She put her arms around my shoulder.

"Y-yes, oo naman. B-bakit naman ako hindi magiging okay?" I forced a laugh, not able to look into anyone's eyes.

"Did Hunter do something to you?" Pabulong niyang tanong habang hinahagod ang likod ko.

"I'm fine, I promise." I cleared my throat. "I'm bored, and I think you don't need me here so, ahm, mag-iikot-ikot muna ako sa resort. If that's okay with you all."

Ayoko namang siraan sa kanila si Hunter, at totoo rin naman na hindi nila ako kaylangan dito.

"Sure, sure. But can I come, though? Hindi na rin naman ako kaylangan dahil tapos na rin naman kaming mag-usap ni Hunter sa phone. Can I come with you, Miss Leir?" Mr. Villareal politely asked, I raised my head and looked at him.

I remembered the things I said with Hunter before leaving him in the restroom.

"Sure, okay lang." Ngumiti ako sa kaniya.

Tumayo siya sa kinauupuan at lumapit sa akin, nilahad niya ang kamay sa akin, sandali ko itong tinitigan bago tanggapin.

"Shall we?" He pulled me to stand carefully.

"Sure." I pulled my hand back right away and hid it behind me. Siya ang naunang maglakad paalis ng cottage, nagpaalam ako sa mag-asawa bago sundan si ito.

Nahagip ng paningin ko si Hunter sa kalayuan, kakalabas lang nito sa restroom at saktong huminto ang paningin niya sa gawi namin. Nag-iwas agad ako ng tingin at sumabay kay Mr. Villareal sa paglalakad.