Find Her

Tasha is the first child of her parents Mr and Mrs Oluwa. They live in a small town called Shai in the region of Osuda in the country of Abisaka. Tasha was only 3 years old when her dad lost his job. Things got so difficult that he had to take to constant drinking due to frustration. This has taken a toll on his family because jobs were not easy to find by then and there was family to raise with their first child being only 3 years old. Mrs Oluwa a young mother with no prior experience had to manage being a mother, wife and a community school teacher. The life she had imagined to live was shattered and she had to adjust. The fire of love that existed as couples gradually began to fade and the choice now is either to leave the marriage or just endure it. But she thought to herself; what if i decide to leave the marriage and start life somewhere else? But will he allow her take his daughter away? She also thought, what if i stay and things get better? What if he stops drinking? what if he gets a new job? what if we start all over? With these soothing thoughts, she decided to stay. Little Tasha as young as she was didn't know what was going on with her family. The drinking habit of Mr Oluwa got pretty intensified. Many times Mrs Oluwa had to be called to come and rescue her husband from the gutters. Vehicles were a luxury to come by since there were not many in the town. She had to on many occasions charter a taxi to take her husband from his drinking joint to the house. The humiliation and trauma this has given her among her peers was enough to send her packing. People began to talk about her husband's drinking problem as others began to recommend solutions to her. Both traditional medicines and spiritual medicines. She is just tired of this life and have had enough of it but she remembers there's a little girl called Tasha that she has to take care of. Many days, weeks and months went by, lo and behold Mrs Oluwa found out that she was pregnant again. Hurray, it is a boy and this has brought a mixed feeling of happiness and sadness to the family. Mrs Oluwa was worried that another child of hers will go through what Tasha has been going through. The love that they planned as couples to shower on their first child did not materialise and another one is on the way. Mr Oluwa was more frustrated because he knew he has failed his family. He knew he was causing his wife a lot of pain but his ego will not allow him ask for forgiveness. Mr Oluwa was frustrated not because of his drinking problem but because he had nobody to help him. Because of his ego, he did not want to ask for help even though he knew he needed help. This attitude of his was as a result of what he suffered from his parents as a child. He felt he was not really loved, cared for and accepted by his family. So he grew up with a lot of hurt and hatred. He wished to give his children a different wave of love as he did not receive that but life's situations are making that dream impossible which now makes him look irresponsible in the society. He was determined to make things different in his heart but he just did not know how to go about it. This has left him with a wounded heart full of hurt and hatred and he was afraid he may pass this onto his children. And since there was no one to understand the pain in his heart or help him reconcile his past with his present, he took to drinking. In all these, he was overjoyed as he is expecting the arrival of a new member of the family. Tasha was happy when her mother told her she will soon have a brother but she had no idea what that means. life was getting a little rough for Mr Oluwa as he still has not gotten any job and also has not stopped drinking. Unfortunately, he lost the little savings he had in an investment scheme so he resorted to farming and rearing of some livestock so as to provide for the family. Mrs Oluwa was also getting paid her salary as a teacher, therefore she was able to provide her needs because she knew she will not get even a handkerchief from her husband as gift. Tasha got the attention and affection of her parents whiles it last. She was showered with gifts as a first child so far as her parents can afford it. Mr Oluwa sold the piece of land he had when he was working as an account officer. The tension and unrest in the house due to the lack of money and drinking problem made it difficult for the family to connect as one. Mrs Oluwa finally gave birth and the baby boy was welcomed into the family. The arrival of this new family member has calmed all nerves and there was some joy in the house again. Mr Oluwa was a lovely man, he just became fragmented by the issues of life. He tried his best to provide for the family and also keep them together. Tasha is set to start schooling and Mr Oluwa knowing the value of education, wants his daughter to go to a private school so she can have the best foundation as possible. It was a little expensive compared to the public schools but he was determined to give his daughter the best. He did not have much luxury except a bicycle on which he takes Tasha to school and brings her back daily. One day he said to himself; i may have made some mistakes in life, i may not be rich now and i don't know if i will be rich in the future but my children will have the best of education. Tasha's younger brother Tobi Oluwa was growing so fast and Mrs Oluwa definitely needs extra hand but there was no one to help. Tasha has to quickly learn and start helping her mother with some of the house chores. Being the first child, she definitely needs to learn how to be a leader. Mr Oluwa was not really a happy man since he still cannot find a job that suits him. The little he had, he spent with friends. He was generally a good man so even as he lost his job, friends still call upon him for help and he always wants to help them. He did not know that these friends were rather opportunists and taking advantage of him. There were many times that these friends steal from him as they go out to drink. They take the opportunity to steal as they brought him home drunk and the wife is not at home. Monies were disappearing strangely from the house but no one could tell what actually the problem was. This has brought a big misunderstanding and mistrust between the couples as Mr Oluwa suspects his wife was stealing from him. The fight, argument and tension always at home did not give Tasha that enabling and lovely home that she was looking for and she was always in fear. Mr Oluwa finally decided to travel outside the town to look for greener pastures. He finally left to Sanko another town about 10 kilometers away from Shai. Mrs Oluwa was not in support of this idea because she knew there will be no one to take care of her husband especially when he gets drunk. Tasha was an intelligent girl. She has her mother who is a teacher around to help her with the homework from school. Mrs Oluwa has to make sure that Tasha is taken to school before she goes back to her school with Tobi. She could not ride the bicycle so he mostly had to pick a taxi and drop Tasha at school. This was becoming a little expensive because Mr Oluwa was not around to help and the taxis were not that common but Tasha is also too young to walk to school as the distance is pretty much. She decided to contract Mr Oluwa's cousin, Dela to be taking Tasha to school as the bicycle was idle. This will also reduce the stress on Mrs Oluwa and enable her not to be late for school. Mr Oluwa could not find anything concrete at Sanko to do but he was helping his friend in the shop so he was getting paid. His friend owns a shop and it was doing pretty good as there are customers always to be served. Therefore Mr Oluwa was able to help his friend in the shop as he was also staying with him. At least he had free accommodation, food and also being paid a token. But he was not happy because that was not what he wanted. The money definitely was not enough to help him achieve his dream. At Sanko he was still looking for other jobs but all to no avail. He was confused as to whether to leave Sanko to a bigger town or just come back to Shai. But he thought to himself; if i come back with nothing, my family will see me as a failure. He then decided to stay a little longer and hope for things to change. He got in touch with his family back at Shai once a while. He stayed at Sanko for six months but he was not able to save enough as he wished. One faithful Wednesday as Dela was taking Tasha to school, they were involved in an accident. Tasha fell off the bicycle and landed in the gutter. The only good news was that she was not run over by an oncoming vehicle. She was conveyed in a car and rushed to the hospital. Dela rushed to Mrs Oluwa's school to inform her of what had happened. She was devastated upon hearing the news and prays to God not to lose her daughter. With tears in her eyes, she rushed to the hospital. Tasha was in a critical condition as she couldn't talk or open her eyes. She was admitted at the Emergency ward in the hospital. Mrs Oluwa could not hold back her tears as she thought she had lost her daughter. Mrs Oluwa's family house is just about a kilometer from the hospital. They were quickly informed and rushed to the hospital to sympathise with her and also pray for their granddaughter, Tasha. Tasha woke up after some hours but she was not able to speak due to the injury. The injury affected her jaw, chin and teeth because she landed with her chin on the floor when she fell. A message was sent to Mr Oluwa at Sanko about the accident. He immediately left Sanko with all his belongings back to Shai. He got to the hospital to see his daughter but she was not able to recognize him immediately. She was in so much pain as she could not talk neither was she able to eat. Mr Oluwa broke down in tears as he blamed himself for the misfortune that happened. This will not have happened if i were around to take my daughter to school, he laments. Mrs Oluwa was happy at least to see her husband after many months and so was Tobi. She was unable to go back to school for many weeks as she had to stay in the hospital and take care of her daughter. Taking care of a sick person and a toddler was a very stressful experience and Mr Oluwa could not do much because he was not a mother and just cannot make Tobi stop crying or take care of Tasha. It has been almost a month since Tasha was admitted at the hospital. She was finally discharged when her condition was much better. The family was devastated because they spent all their savings at the hospital and Mr Oluwa was more depressed since he was back to the same old broke life. But at least he was happy to see his daughter alive. Tasha's wounds were healing fast so Mrs Oluwa was able to go to school again. She goes with Tasha and Tobi. Tasha was more of a quiet little girl so she did not have many friends therefore she does not usually get visits from her friends neither does she also visit. She only gets to meet with her friends when she is at school. Amina, Helena and Jude were her good friends at school so they paid her a surprise visit at home when they found out that she was injured. Tasha loves football, she is always seen playing football with the boys in her class. She is always calm, quiet and usually alone especially when her friends are not around so the only entertainment is playing football with the boys. Mr Oluwa was more focused on his farming now even though he sometimes drinks but not like he did in the past. There was a new private school that was opened in the community and parents began to send their kids there. Mr Oluwa also wants Tasha to experience this new school. The only problem is that Tasha will leave her good friends Amina, Helena and Jude. She was just getting used to these friends and was getting comfortable with them but she will have to leave them and start with new friends in a different environment. Mr and Mrs Oluwa finally got their finances together and Tasha was enrolled in this new school. Mr Oluwa was comfortable with this new school because Mrs Oluwa's niece who was a little older than Tasha was also enrolled in the school. At last there is a family member that will watch over Tasha and protect her, they said. Tasha was not happy at all because she will miss her friends. On the first day at her new school, she felt so empty and lonely because she knows no one there, not even her cousin. Alisa who happens to be Tasha's family member and cousin was in the upper class whiles Tasha was in the lower class. She is older than Tasha and hardly even checks up on her. Tasha could not tell her parents how lonely she feels in her new school. She sits and eats her meals alone and gets back to class. She hardly plays with any of her classmates. She also does not get the opportunity frequently to play with the kids in her neighborhood because her mother does not want her to be influenced by the negative behavior of some of the kids. Mr and Mrs Oluwa are very strict and disciplinarian parents. They do not want their children to pick up some rude habits from other kids. So Tasha is mostly in the house either helping her mother with some chores, asleep and resting or playing with Tobi. The only time she gets to play is when her parents are not around, especially her mother. With that she joins the boys in the neighborhood to play football and other games. Tasha is a very shy girl mostly because of her upbringing. Because her parents are very strict, she does not have the freedom to do her own will and she is often punished for the little mistake. She is sometimes shouted upon, abused verbally or insulted especially by her dad when he is angry. This has made Tasha timid and always afraid. Months went by and Mrs Oluwa got pregnant with her third child and it was a girl. The atmosphere in the house is not much of love but that of endurance. Mr and Mrs Oluwa seem to be tired of the marriage. This has affected their relationship with their children. The feeling of frustration and guilt has made them to withhold their love and affection. There is always some anger and punishment being received. Tasha was young but she could feel that there was something wrong. She wished to be loved wholly by her parents but this does not seem to be the case. She cannot remember the day her parents told her they love her. Her parents provided all that they could but there was a big vacuum of affection that she lacks. She is always afraid to speak up because she does not know if she will be ignored or accepted. Nine months passed and baby Teni was born. Tasha was over joyed because she now has a sister. The family was becoming bigger so was the expenditure and the responsibilities. Mr Oluwa was happy to be a father to another child but that means he needs more money. He frequently harvests the produce of his farm and sells them to make some money. Mrs Oluwa always got herself secured with her salary so she does not have to get her husband more frustrated. She sometimes gets him gifts of things he loves because she knew her husband loves her as much as she loves him. He was just too broken because of how his life has turned out and out of guilt of failure, he withheld his love. Teni is going to be my last child, says Mrs Oluwa. She has decided not to have anymore children. Tasha was more like a second mother in the house but she was only 8 years old. At this age she could perform most of the house chores and her mother was pleased to have someone who is now giving her a helping hand. She can clean the house, wash dishes, wash her clothes and bath herself. So Mrs Oluwa now has the time to focus on Tobi and little Teni.