betrayal of a mate

Friend

RIIIIINNNNGGGGGGGG

I slowly open my eyes at the sound of my alarm , 5 o’clock as usual, only to find myself hugging the cold hard floor of my basement instead of my so called bed . I must’ve rolled around in my sleep , not that it matters since there is no difference between the two but the little warmth that I try so hard to get is very much appreciated.

Slowly , I try to feel my sore muscles and legs , which confirms my doubts. “This is gonna be a hard day “ I say to myself “just like every day “ I add . I can’t feel anything but pain cursing through my body. I feel like s**t to say the least as if I was ran over buy a mammoth , a big giant ass one ,  and believe me you don’t want to even imagine how it feels . It takes me a few minutes and deep breaths as I keep trying to get up .

Finally , I succeeded in standing up , paying no attention to my jelly like legs , I start limping trowards the bathroom like a retarted frog .

After what felt like ages , I stepped inside and looked at the mirror.I gasped out loud at the sight before me . The sickly paleness of my skin on contrast with the blue and dark bruises on my body  almost had me gagging. Not to mention, my oily messed up bed hair along with my dirty clothes. Even beggars looked more decent than me . Suddenly,  I felt my cheeks get wet . I was crying and to tell the truth I felt like dying . 

It’s these moments that I’m reminded of my ugly self that gets me more depressed and emotional over the top. I try to ignore these feelings and thoughts as much as I can through the day and busying myself with the chores just so that I can take a break from this .  “ oh moon goddess , give me strength “ and with that silent prayer to myself , I decided to get going . After wiping my tears, i carefully took off my clothes ,trying my best to make this less painful than it is because every step or movement feels like hell , then I stepped under  the shower letting the cold water wash over me . I’m not allowed warm water so the cold water is the only thing I can get and I’m thankful for that . I try to enjoy the showers as much as I can , ignoring the shivers that went through my spine . 

Few minutes later , I closed the water and decided to get dressed in a dark blue t-shirt that has I KNOW IM FAB I chuckled at that . Remembering how I got this shirt , it was one of Kylie’s. Oh Kylie how much I miss you . He is the only one who bothers to talk to me . I swear I could’ve gone insane from all of this and not having anyone to talk to . But Kylie was different . He may not talk much but each sentence he says is full of hope and positivity and I honestly enjoy his company more than anything. I still remember the day we met like it was yesterday.

**FLASHBACK**

It was another hot hellish summer day , that I spent of course working like a dog and sweating like a pig . Although, I liked how the pack members were two busy enjoying their life than beating me up . Didn’t mean that they stopped entirely but it was less frequent now because they would rather spend their time sleeping,f*****g or eating and going out . 

As for me I was too busy doing chores just like now . Since the Luna decided all of a sudden to have the clothes to be washed and every bed sheet to be changed and washed even those that are in rooms that are not even used . Of course that means more chores to me . 

I let out a sight I didn’t know I was holding as I hung the white clean sheets to dry under the burning sun .

“Hey there ! Sorry I don’t know your name but can I call you mine ?” Said a deep beautiful voice from behind me 

Startled by the sudden intrusive comment , I turned around  stealing a glance at the men . He had a wavy blond hair that falls above his eyes , those deep blue eyes , I kept staring at them as if there is no tomorrow. To be interpreted by him saying “ I guess that’s a yes then “ he said with a smirk on his beautiful face 

“Oh god ! I kept staring at him for two long !! He’s going to kill me “ I thought to myself as fear started to ungulf me . Trembling I swallowed and avoided his gaze looking at his feet and mumbled “ I’m so-rry, ii mm s.. so sorry “ I closed my eyes shut waiting to get hit . A few moments passed but nothing happened, so I opened my eyes slowly only to find his beautiful face turned to a sad one and his eyes filled with many emotions that looked like sadness, compassion,pity .. shocked by his reaction I stared at him in disbelief and as if he sensed my emotions he said in a soft voice as if afraid that I will break “ honey , I’m not here to hurt you . So please don’t ever be afraid of me “ although his voice and words and whole demeanor doesn’t seem offensive or dangerous I can’t help but doubt him nor shake the fear that was deeply rooted inside of me .

“I know you might not believe me but I swear to the moon goddess I mean you no harm . You can trust me dear “he paused a little as if waiting for a response from me which I didn’t give because It was my first time having someone talk to me without shouting ,cursing or through beatings . Hell I never had a normal conversation with anyone , so having a handsome stranger guy coming to talk to ME instead of the cool beautiful were-girls is something I don’t know how to react to at all . 

“I’m Kylie by the way “ said Kylie with a small smile . I hesitated a little before replying but decided to do it anyway he might get angry with me and decide to hit me . I can’t trust anyone. 

“ Alexandra “ I whispered looking anywhere but him . “What a beautiful name you have !” He yelled excited but me being me I got frightened by his voice and closes my eyes tightly and crouched down on myself in defense , shaking so bad , I was afraid of him , i m afraid of everything and I can’t help it because fear is all I know when it comes to interacting with others , I was taught this the hard painful way all of my life so I can’t change it all of a sudden . Suddenly I felt someone hugging me , I flinched at the contact but stayed still .  We stayed like this for a while until I heared him say “ Alexandra please look at me “ slowly I raised my head and looked at him , he was looking at me with a hurt face as if I stepped on his heart “I know you are afraid and you can’t help it but don’t worry I’m not blaming you .. mm what I mean is i know what you are going through and I know that you could use a friend , hell I would use a friend. You see i have been bullied by my brother and some pack members and even my parents think I’m a failure because .. mmm .. because .. I’m gay “ he said the last part in a whisper but since we are basically sitting down with me in his lap and his arms holding me tightly I was able to hear him clearly and to say I saw that coming would be a lie . Being gay maybe normal to humans but in the werewolves community it is still a heated subject and although the kingdom didn’t ban them or tolerate discrimination between the members it was more or less accepted in some packs but our pack is a different story . They find fault with everything let  alone someone who is openly gay it must be hell for him. As if he sensed my turmoil he suddenly asked me with puppy eyes “you are not disgusted by me are you ? .. I mean I would get it if you don’t want to be my friend..” but before he could finish I said “ no iii I would lov love to “ and in a flash he gave me a bone crushing hug yelling “ i knew you would be my friend “ and I felt myself smiling at his childish act , for the first time since I could remember. 

**END OF FLASHBACK **

Since then we kept meeting up whenever we had a chance , he would tell me stories about his day , the rumors going on in the pack and even give me some of his shirts which are all I wear now .He is truly amazing, he even taught me a lot of cursing although I was hesitant at first he said it’s alright to curse from time to time to let out some stress . Oh and I still remember the one time he secretly bought me ice cream when he learned I never tasted it and honestly I cried so hard that day because no one ever made me feel so happy. But happiness is a luxury I cannot afford because as soon as the alpha heared of kylie being gay he banished him from the pack two  years ago and I didn’t get the chance to say goodbye . since then i’ve been all alone having lost my one and only friend and support which broke me more .