My Secret desire

8.

Serena

The days flies by in a blur, complete with none communication with my family even though I have tried to call them multiple times, but to no use, they do apparently not want anything to do with me, but I also doesn´t give them a crap, I know my mother loves me, but I don´t have anything to thank them for, and she does have a strange way of showing it, I have always felt that I didn´t belong to my own family. 

I have earned my way into college by a scholarship and hard work, and my parents paid my sisters college full on, that´s the story of my life, I have worked hard for everything made my own life if you will, but my sister has everything served on a silver-plate and has never lifted a finger to work all her her life, and everyone except my parents know that her grades are so high in college because she is sleeping around with the professors, just the mere thought makes my toes curl in disgust. 

Today is Thursday, and after classes it is time for my afternoon with Diana, I can´t help but smile when she comes into my room and jump on my bed with christmaslights in her eyes.

"Are you ready for today gorgeous? It really is shame that we has to go to classes today before we are free to do as we please (and by we I of course mean me), so get up and get dressed." I giggle at her when she pouts over the injustice that she has to live through.

"you are adorable Diana, you know I love you and I am beginning to look forward to this afternoon but as I am here on a scholarship I cant afford to be ungrateful, so I will get up head the showers and then go to classes and dream for the school to end" I give her a hug an takes of to the shower.

I take my time thinking about the last days that has passed, I have had this eerie feeling that somebody has watching me, but there has never been anything remotely suspicious around, except almost everywhere I look I see Alia and her new boytoy, I haven´t seen him up front which is a rare thing considering how college is boiling and everyone is gossiping about how incredible hot he is.

and of course I won´t argue that I am curious I am a woman, but I have a feeling that I am in dire risk of being a victim of the same disease that seems to have infected every female on college, I even had to stop Diana the other day because she was going on and on about his smoldering stares, and how you lost all your senses when he focused his intense stare at you. It was about that time that I stopped her because I do know that I no choice in seeing him face to face at some time but I need bit more time to brace myself for whatever it is he is doing to females.

I can help but imagine how he looks in front, I have only seen him from behind, always dressed to impress, broad shoulders, tall and his short dark hair looks airdried in a way most men would kill for like he stepped out from some sort of magazine. 

I sigh and give myself a mental slap, what the hell am I doing I haven´t even seen him yet, and when he is so clever to be with Alia and her drones I seriously doubt his sanity.

I finish and get dressed, and when I am done I walks out and join Diana, just when we are about to leave Nate comes into our apartment and asks if we are ready to leave he has brought a cappuccino for Diane and my favorite which is half coffee and half cocoa I know it sounds weird but it is freaking delicious. 

"Thanks Nate, you are a darling for coming through, when we are in need" I says and flashes my eyes.

"My hero indeed" Diana sigh and wave her hands in front of her head. we laugh as we walks to the campus.

The day runs by like every other, except for an incident where I bump into somebody I don´t even look up when I apologize I just scurry of, even though every fiber in my body are vibrant and it´s like my blood is singing in a longing tone, when I am far enough away I cant help my curiosity, and look back to see who it was that make me feel so much by doing literally nothing. 

But there are not a single soul around in the hallway, I am wondering if I am going crazy but I am certain that there was someone there my shoulder is charged with a sort of electricity and it is not uncomfortable, it feel like it have are mind on it´s own and it is trying to sooth me, be more at ease.     

when the class is over I meet up with Nate in the canteen and he hugs me tightly as I tell him about my earlier incident that has left me in complete confusion. 

"It´s going to be okay sweet baby" He says to me, and then his other words are drowned when Alia walks in with her entire entourage a suddenly my flight instinct sets in, I now it is her, by horde around her, she is closest to me and the new guy (which I haven´t seen yet but still wondered what looked like) goes on the other side of her, and suddenly the whole room freezes just as Nate says 

"I will always help my girl when she is in need" he keeps hugging me and put his head down on top of my hair, and I don´t as for right know has the energy to set him in his place, so I just enjoy his closeness, when we hear a boneshaking growl, like somebody has let loose a very big feline predator, and the whole room is filled with a energy so strong that it feels like I´m being suffocated, and the air is filled with silent promises of hurt and an anger that I have never ever been in contact with (and with my history with Chris, I have been firsthand witness to humans cruelty and anger).

Nate looks around to see where the sound came from, but very quickly discovers that there simply isn´t some wild animal on the prowl, and he lies his head back down,

when we stands there I feel like someone is staring at me, with real interest and a pair of eyes burning into my back, I squirm around in Nates arms to try and see who it is but it is to no use he holds me in a iron-grip. 

"please let go Nate, I appreciate your concern but I don´t need you smothering in full public especially when I give clear signal that I want you to let go."

He let go of me immediately, and look like somebody told him his best friend just died.

"I´m not mad at you I just need you to understand my line of thought." I put my hand on his arm.

"I know you´re not mad at me, but I am sorry I just wanted to protect my best friend from whatever it was, when I didn´t believed you the night on the beach"

The beach when I think about it, I can´t help but think this sound was much like the one there.

"I know that was the time where you thought I was making things up, but we don´t know if there is a lonely shifter or even a pride of them around here." I say daring him to try my patience, because I can feel that my temper is running short. 

"you are right Ren I am sorry for acting like a jerk that night, I can see know that though I didn´t hear anything that necessarily meant you didn´t, especially after today." he hold his hands up in defense in front of himself. 

"It´s okay, but we have to go to class now." I gather my things and heads for the door when a voice stops me dead in my tracks.

"are you sure it´s safe for dear Nate to be so close to you, especially after what happened last time a boy came too close" I hear her wicked voice, and surely when I turn to look at her, Alia stands expectantly to see if or how I will react. I vaguely register that it is only her usual followers the new guy and his friends are nowhere to be seen. 

"Do you really want to risk the life of your so called best friend, so recklessly" she puts her and on her heart and act shocked like she really cares but her eyes tells everything about her intentions.

"Alia (I try very hard not to cringe) you are wasting you´re time to try making me feel guilty (she doesn´t have to know that is the exact feeling), but for the record NO I did not kill him, he died due to a heart attack they aren´t common around teens but they do happen, the coroners said so, and I have no fault in that. (while I talked I felt a surge of power and contentment and it was emitting from my necklace like the words just flowed out of me in their own) I don´t care if you think you´re gaining anything by trying to take me down, but on absolutely no circumstances will I stand by and let you drag my friends down, really it is poor behavior and a sign of jealousy, you will never see me send jealous eyes you´re way since you have nothing I would ever want, even if you say to yourself that I was supposed to be extremely jealous of you that will never happen since you are beneath me." 

I turned around letting a fuming Alia stand in silence when the people around us broke down in cheers.

I had taken to steps when I heard her, close to my ear

"Are you sure? He did pick me after all, Darien is what this is all about, he is so hot that being with him could as it is for me rise me to the stars where I belong, or in than necessarily." she smirks at me as that did it all.

" Listen you and listen closely, even though I haven´t met him yet, I have no doubt that you are right that he is gorgeous but let´s face it if he is lightheaded enough to think of you as good company then he can´t be that bright now can he?" I say in my most innocent tone as turn around and hastens away from her before my insult appears to her, just when I am on another floor I hear her furious burst of anger when she comes to terms with my last words.

I goes to class my mood is much lifted, when Diana approaches me and she is lively and bouncing in excitement

"are you ready to feel like a queen for the rest of the day? by the way I heard that you was having a clash with Alia and I must say you go - I will just tell you to tread careful, I don´t know what it is but I am having an eerie feeling about her."

I agree absently to her words, I have thought so myself numerous times, but my mind is circling around another person (or lack of presence). Darien´s absence had me thinking and almost going mad by wondering where he was, I know he was there one minute few minutes later he was nowhere to be seen.

what the hell was the deal with him, and why did I keep on thinking about him.