SHATTERED BY YOU

ONCE AGAIN

ALEC'S POV,

“You look beautiful. Like a bride out of one of those reality shows.” Mom gushed. I nodded my head from the other side of her, agreeing with my mom.

Liz was looking really amazing in her beautiful strapless gown and half-curled hair.

Mom wasn't exaggerating when she said that Liz was looking like a reality tv star because she truly seemed to be that pretty in her white dress, if not even more.

“You are going to kill my friend with your beauty tonight.” I smiled, and a single drop rolled down my eyes. I couldn't control my emotions, even though it had been almost a week since I came back. “Wow, and now I'm crying like a baby.”

I definitely made the right decision by attending the marriage.

“I swear Alec if you won't stop your tears I'll send you back to wherever you came from.” Liz threatened, dabbing her eyes with a tissue that was handed by mom when her eyes got teary. “Oh god mom, my makeup is ruined. He is ruining my makeup. Kick him out of the room.” She yelled when I broke into sobs, making her cry even more.

“I am sorry. I am just….I'm glad that I came.” I said, still sobbing and trying desperately to keep my eyes dry.

“We are glad too, honey.” Mom hugged me while rubbing my back affectionately and kissed my cheeks after a minute when we pulled from the hug.

“So, first you made me cry to ruin the makeup and now you are stealing the spotlight.” Liz glared playfully. “Screw you, Alec. I shouldn't have invited you in the first place. Wasted the whole day writing that stupid letter.” I really missed her and the nonsense she always had in her pocket.

“Language!!” Mom rolled her eyes and went back to check on little Darcy, John's and Liz's fifteen months old daughter. The cutest being I've ever seen.

After mom left, I looked at Liz with a proud smile. She was busy fixing her makeup, so she wasn't able to see me staring at her with a dumb smile.

She was incredible.

She was one of the most successful businesswomen in the country with numerous branches of Diva spread out not only in America but also in England, Canada and a new branch in France that was just two months away. Along with it, she was also a great mother, a helping friend, and now she was going to be a perfect wife.

Her eyes were filled with tears and she's chewing on her lower lips nervously.

“Having second thoughts?” I teased but regretted it the very next second when she threw her bracelet at me.

It hit my face, just below my right eye. “Ow, that's abuse. I could have been blinded.”

“Then shut up, idiot.” She sighed and threw the tissue in her hand. “Do you think it's the right decision? I mean, we aren't rushing things, right? It's not too soon?”

I shook my head immediately, “It's not. I've known you both, and I can see the amount of love and respect you have for each other. The love you two share is beautiful, just like you two. Stop overthinking and enjoy every moment of this. It is your big day after all.” I comforted her, smiling broadly. “Just so you know, I'm not going to take your place again. I don't see John that way.”

She laughed at that. “You don't have to do it again.” I smiled too, but it was definitely a topic I shouldn't have touched because my heart ached when nostalgia hit me. She saw my face and frowned. “I am sorry for doing that to you.”

I shook my head again, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand.

“You didn't do anything. Deep down I wanted that, and it wasn't bad always. There are things that I loved and will remember forever. I'm happy for those incredible memories.”

“Okay,” She smiled, turning towards me and said, “Let's hope I don't trip.”

I couldn't control but laugh at that, and with teary eyes answered. “Given your clumsiness, I'll be surprised if you didn't.”

“I am not clumsy,” Liz screamed, turning her back towards me and looking at the mirror to adjust the veil on her head. “By the way, are you okay with today? Meeting him after all these years?”

“Truthfully, I don't know,” I told her truthfully because there was nothing to hide anymore.

“Hmm…” She hummed with a small sad smile on her lips. “I understand, and I am really sorry for…well everything.” Liz apologized, and I shook my head yet again. But before I could answer mom came inside the room, so the topic died down.

“My daughter does look like an angel from heaven, doesn't she?” Mom praised before hugging Liz.

After they pulled away, Liz looked at the mirror and frowned seeing her tear-stained face. “Don't lie, my makeup is still a mess.” She patted her fingertips under her eyes to rub the area, while her light brown hair moved with her as she shook her head.

“Let's fix it, but no more tears after that. Understand?” Mom pulled some brushes from the drawer and started fixing her makeup while I took a seat on a sofa sitting next to the huge mirror.

A knock at the door stole our attention.

“Honey?” Dad's voice came, soft and cautious. “Our little Darcy is awake.”

“She was sleeping a moment ago.” Mom stopped and turned around to see Darcy staring at her with her beautiful brown eyes. “What happened to you? Grandpa woke you up?” She questioned Darcy playfully and kissed her forehead.

“She was sleeping, but as soon as you left she woke up. Her stomach was also growling, a few minutes ago. I think she's hungry.” Dad answered, hugging Darcy tighter against his chest. “So, where is the diaper bag? I can't find it.”

“On the sofa, wait.” Mom said before grabbing it and coming back with a milk bottle in her hand. “Feed her, please.”

“Mommy,” The little child said when her eyes fell on her mom for the first time. She reached her hands out for Liz to take, and that scene was really cute.

“Hoiii, little Darcy.” I stood in front of Liz and took her in my arms. She was very light and giggled when I tried to kiss her cheeks.

Darcy was as shy as her mother was in her childhood. Even though she looked more like John, there were some features that she got from her mother. She had the same nose as me, Liz, and dad. Her hair was also a little curly, and she did inherit Liz's attitude. Basically from the outside, she was everything John, but inside she was anything but Liz.

“Are you all ready? John is already on the altar. Hurry folks!” Colton informed as he entered the room in his white jacket, black trousers, and a purple shirt.

He looked amazing. I wanted to kiss him. I could have kissed him, but the little voice in my head was screaming that Jasper was somewhere. I tried to stop thinking about him, but ever since I came back to New York City weeks ago, it's like my body could sense that he's somewhere near. Luckily, I haven't seen him yet. He was ignoring me. Definitely.

Why else would you not be next to your ‘best friend’ who's getting married in a few days?

“Quit starting Alec, I'm feeling self-conscious,” Colton said, making everyone in the room laugh. “I'm serious.”

“I should go and see how things are going on. Call me if there is any problem.” Dad smiled, eyes twitching at the corner. “And Liz, please don't run this time.”

Liz turned at dad and glared at him, making everyone in the room laugh. “I hate all of you.”

Dad shook his head and took Darcy from my arms before leaving the room along with her and the milk bottle. Colton too went out with Dad. It was once again me, mom, and Liz inside the room.

“We should go out too. Your makeup is all done and you…. you're ready.” Mom said as she clicked a photo of Liz on her phone.

“Yes, I am ready,” Liz took some deep breaths and looked at the mirror for the last time. “Okay, it's just a marriage. Let's do it.”

“Let's go,” I said and followed her out.

We walked down the hallway in silence. Liz was terrified, I could sense it. With every step towards the hall, her breathing became harder, much choppier and her eyes danced at every corner around the beautifully decorated hallway. I reached for her palms and held them on my own to comfort her as much as I could. Her hands were cold, like metal.

“Everything will be okay. You are going to have an amazing life with your husband and beautiful daughter.” I smiled at her to show that she was being anxious for no reason. “Just know that you deserve all the happiness in the world.”

“I love you, Alec.” She blinked her eyes to stop the tears. “And I'm sorry for being selfish.”

“You are not being selfish. I'm the selfish one here because I wanted to be a part of my sister's wedding.”

“You're okay, right?” She asked once again.

We were now standing in front of the huge door. The wedding planner was next to it, whispering something to the maid of honor and her date. The music was playing lightly inside the hall. They had booked the same band from my and Jasper's wedding. The music was audible, mixed with the chatter of people.

My heart could feel that he's inside.

The wedding planner looked at us and smiled before starting, “Ms. Salvatore, come here an—”

I couldn't hear the rest of her words because I caught sight of him. Finally, after five years, I saw him. He was in front of me. Just a few steps from us.

He was in a black tuxedo, hairs styled like before. The way I loved it. A huge smile on his lips. He had facial hair, making him look more mature and aged. He was clicking pictures of two boys in light green jackets, next to the huge flower work near the door. They both were showing their toothy grin. Laughing and trying different poses.

His twins.

He looked amazing, not tired or worried like the last time I remember seeing him. His eyes were glittering, filled with joy and happiness. He was the same Jasper Lightwood with whom I fell in love when we were in high school. The guy who looked like the happiest man in the world whenever I got to see him during the holidays when I was in college, far away from my sad and always worried husband.

‘Maybe me leaving him wasn't a bad decision. He deserves happiness, and if he is happy without me, I could see from afar and be happy for him.’ The thought ran in my mind. I smiled seeing him happy.

“Okay everyone, positions.” The wedding planner ordered, snapping me out. “Where are the ring bearers?”

“Here,” Jasper said, rising from his position. His voice is still the same, deep but not too deep or pitched.

Unconsciously, I turned my head towards his voice. He was smiling while walking towards us, but as soon as his eyes met mine, he stopped, and his smile faded away. His face was blank, and his mouth opened slightly. Maybe to inhale deeply. I couldn't see anything in his eyes. So, I broke the connection first and looked away, down at my connected hands with Liz.

Liz stood next to me without a word, she knew what was going inside my mind.

I couldn't focus because once again I was the man trapped in a child's body. The music changed, it was Liz's favorite. The event started, the flower girls went first, followed by ring bearers, then the maid of honor, and finally Liz and me.

“Don't let me fall,” Liz whispered as we stepped inside the hall.

I forced a smile, looking straight at John at the opposite end. “Never in my life.”