I Was Here

The Rain

The Rain

 The rain made a very loud noise tonight. Heavy rain falls and hits hard on the roof of the houses and also on the ground. I listened to the sound of the rain and felt the heavy weight of the water streaming like it will never end. The rain constantly poured followed by a very strong sound of thunder which made Chi-Chan barked in panic. I saw Mallory quickly jumped on her mother’s lamp as soon as she heard the sound of the thunder. ‘Mama, I’m afraid.’ Mallory cried as she embraced her mother tightly in fear.  ‘Don’t be afraid, the thunder cannot enter the house.’ Her mother said. ‘Baby listen, our roof won’t break because of the thunder.’

I wanted to tell them not to fear or worry, for they are just fine. From a distance I watched how they lived their lives. I looked at Irina as she comforted Mallory. I honestly admire her and she does not have to know.

I wish a day will come when I can be with her, alive. I am dreaming of the day when the sunlight will touch my skin. I will feel the warmth of the sunlight on my body, I will walk barefoot on the rough texture of the white sand of the beach. And I will feel the cool wind blowing against my very face.

Irina and I will walk side by side. I will hold her skinny fingers to my hands and will not let go. I will watch the wind blow some strands of her dark hair to her pretty face. And I will look at her broad skinny shoulders, and kiss them. I will hold her small waist and bring her closer to my body. And slowly I will place my hand on her sexy butt and squeeze them harder.

I want to hear her laugh. When she laughs out loud, I know she is falling in love with me too.

And I will kiss her lips at the very moment she least expects. And I will indulge to taste her mouth and lick her tongue while I grip her small face with my hands.

I will spend the whole day and night alone with her, only if it can happen.

Although I doubt if it can ever happen. I am dead. It only hurts to dream about the beach, the sun, the sand, the cool wind and Irina. It breaks my heart. I don’t want to hope for things I know can never happen, because it just hurts. I still look at her, only if she knows. 

I stand alone in the rain looking at the dark sky where all I can see is water, for it is both the rain and my tears flowing to my face.

Irina,

Maybe it ends here. And we never happened. I never had the courage to tell you how I feel. Only if things can be easy for us but we are against all tides.  I will continue to care for you from a distance where we can’t be together. Stay brave.

I loved you and I am sorry,

Eric 

  Lost StarsBy Adam Levine

Please, don't see

Just a boy caught up in dreams and fantasies

Please, see me

Reaching out for someone I can't see

Take my hand

Let's see where we wake up tomorrow

Best laid plans

Sometimes are just a one night stand

I'll be damned

Cupid's demanding back his arrow

So let's get drunk on our tears

And, God, tell us the reason

Youth is wasted on the young

It's hunting season and the lambs are on the run

Searching for meaning

But are we all lost stars

Trying to light up the dark?

Who are we?

Just a speck of dust within the galaxy

Woe is me

If we're not careful turns into reality

Don't you dare let our best memories bring you sorrow

Yesterday I saw a lion kiss a deer

Turn the page

Maybe we'll find a brand new ending

Where we're dancing in our tears

And, God, tell us the reason

Youth is wasted on the young

It's hunting season

And the lambs are on the run

Searching for meaning

But are we all lost stars

Trying to light up the dark?

And I thought I saw you out there crying

And I thought I heard you call my name

And I thought I heard you out there crying

Just the same

Oh yeah, yeah yeah yeah yeah

God, give us the reason

Youth is wasted on the young

It's hunting season and this lamb is on the run

Searching for meaning

But are we all lost stars

Trying to light up the dark?

And I thought I saw you out there crying

And I thought I heard you call my name

And I thought I heard you out there crying

But are we all lost stars

Trying to light up the dark?

But are we all lost stars

Trying to light up the dark?