The Alphas Regret and The True Luna

I woke up early this morning around 5:30 a.m., and I placed the pillow over my face as I groaned in disdain. Why the hell am I awake right now? Ugh, this is bullshit its been like this for weeks now. Why am I waking up like this? I don't have to be up until 8 am. I threw the pillow off my face and put it under my head again. I looked out my window only to see that it's still dark out but not quite daylight, yet some of the stars were fading into the dark navy blue sky while the brightest stars shined bright. I could still see my favorite Constellations regulus and Sirius. I don't know why they are my favorite, maybe because they are the most brightest and i always look up at them as I looked up at the night sky i was always drawn to them like some moth to a light bulb however I still found beauty in them and if I'm being honest I loved the simplicity of life and nature around me I love astronomy and everything to do with with space and the nebulas and orions belt or the fact that the stars were made up of gasses there was so much beauty up there that we don't get to see down here unless we view it from the humans hubble telescope I loved alot of the things in the human world because as flawed they are but there is philosophy and so much to learn about the world we live in it makes wolfen society seem more dull in comparison, I sit up and press my knees to my chest as my mind wondered the wolfen society it mainly built up of strick ranks not like the human laws or way of life only the strongest can lead and the weakest gets looked down on and treated differently and not well liked really for romance it's hard because the ranked kids are snobby and just want to bag good strong blood like being a beta or gamma or zeta but the real prize is the alpha every she wolf would do and give anything to be fated to an alpha if not at least be the alphas chosen mate I rolled my eyes at the mere thought of it because to me is so mundane to throw your self at a high rank for a Luna position I could carless about it to be honest I didn't want to a mate because I know I'll either be rejected on the spot or get treated so badly that they won't reject me but sleep around with others and you end up feeling the pain of the betrayal I hate it that wolves don't respect the mate bonds before you find your fated mate I feel you should save your self for your fated mate and wait to see if they really are worth giving the mate a chance to see how and who they are as a person because once you mark and mate you're fated partner your bound together until death does the them part wolves are monogamous beings that alot of wolves seem to know that but disregard it in the excuse of we have needs or that was before we met I've heard all the excuses from my pack and others it really shaped how I feel about mates and made me not want one but at some point I'll be fated and I prayed to the moongoddes that she dosint give me a mate because I wanted to build my own life on my own terms with no male influence in my life that dictates my brain work I am different from my older triplet brothers that I do know as I keep more to myself I observe my surroundings and people around me I tend to analyze the actions of people if I see you doing good things than you have earned my respect and if you don't do good things than your not deserving of my respect and that goes for anyone in high ranks I've never been the girl to shy away to say what I mean and make it clear to anyone that oversteps me I only speak when I need to speak up for what I see is not right and that it need to be reavaluated I may be an omega but something tells me deep down that I'm not as what I seem only time will tell the night of my first shift in 3 months time. my friends Michael and Eve and Shane said the first shift hurts, but it gets better over time, and I can't wait to see what my wolf looks like. I can't wait to meet my wolf. My dad and my older brothers always said I was meant to do great things in this life and that my mother knew it the day I was born, I never understood it seems they held high expectations of me but I consider myself the black sheep of my family along with my pack as I felt I never fit in let alone fit the ancient wolfen ways of society it was ran differently than the mundane world the wolfen society hated the humans because alot of the wolves lost their family or mates by the hands of the hunters some wolfen are fated mated to a mundane and end up rejecting them like how an alpha will reject any she wolf that's not strong or a low rank or wolfless in turn really sucked for the rejected she wolves I hated how it worked because a true luna is not defined by her appearance or status it is defined of her heart and soul as she is the heart of the pack that leads the pack when the alpha is not present the luna loves her pack like they are her own children, luna hera is a prime example of that I looked up to her as if she was my mother she was the true heart of this pack that was led to become the strongest pack she was the most kind hearted woman and the bravest women our alpha Lucian on the other hand is rather intimaditating and cold on the surface he is as well as merciless when needed to be he was the most powerful man in the pack however they had a self centered son who is the packs biggest man w***e every she wolf threw them selves at him hoping they would be his fated mate so they could become luna of the pack Bane is the next alpha in line after his dad his current girlfriend is also my school bully her name was Heather she's the daughter of beta sean and she is the most stuck up b***h everyone knows she's wanted bane to reject his fated mate when he does find her so she could be his chosen mate she only cared about her vanity and she hated pups so she wouldn't make a good luna as she could carless about the Dark Hollow Moon pack i roll to my side and sighed I can't wait to be 18 and leave this pack behind, but could I really leave my older brothers ? cillian and Marcus and Dante have always been there for me and looked after me. I was their baby sister, and they were always protective of me and always harped on me to be patient about wanting to leave the pack and about not wanting me to go and live in the mundane world they were always worried I would be killed by a hunter even my friends were afraid of me leaving.