Second chance to fate

CHAPTER 3- SECOND CHANCE

Lilith looked up and found her brother whimpering trying to hold back his tears. Was she that bad? She already made her brother cry on her second chance first day.

“William, did I say anything that hurt you? I am sorry if I did” Lilith muttered in fear of hurting her brother

“No silly, I am just happy you have realized that John and Samantha are not good parents and are not worth crying over for. And I am also happy that I am not alone again” William expressed hugging his sister and burying his head in her hair he was always fond of.

Lilith smile as this intimate position. This the first time William initiated contact, he always hated when someone touched him, at least they were progressing.

“I promise to be the Mother Samantha never was and the Father John never was. I promise to love you like a Father, Mother and sister. I promise to always be there for you, to care for you and be the shield against all things. I promise to make you my top priority. I will do my best so that you won’t ever feel alone. We are in this together, you hear me Willy?” Lilith cried and she hugged her brother tightly as if trying to prove a point. Lilith felt water on her neck and she knew William was crying, he nodded while sniffing. She wondered how long he had yearned to hear such words. She rubbed his back vigorously trying her best to comfort her brother.

“I got you now buddy, I got you” Lilith muttered repeatedly while trying to hold her back her tears. This second chance at life was not for her, but her brother and she will be damned if she let anything happen to him, falling asleep in the process

Lilith woke up ahead of her brother; she decided to stay with him but could not sleep because she was afraid it was just a dream. She checked the time and it was just 6am. She remembered that today was Monday meaning she and William had to go to school. She turned to her brother and a smile play on her lips; she kissed his forehead and stirs him awake in the process.

“William wake up, we have to prepare for school” Lilith spoke gently in the ear shaking him gently

“Mhmm, Kay ” William mumbled incoherent words but still got up

When Lilith saw William was up and heading up to his bathroom, she got up and headed to her room to take a shower and prepare for school.

*

Lilith was already dressed for school, she hated she hated the idea of school for a second time, wearing uniform, going for classes and all for the second time but if that is what she has to do in return for getting a second chance she did not mind. She stood in front of her room mirror looking at herself. She took time to examine her features, her Irish-blue eyes, her tan skin, her tiny waist but large hips and bum, her black waist-length hair that she usually sway side by side because she leave them down. She felt ugly, she felt small, and she felt that even a hippopotamus was better looking than her. Tears started to swell in her eyes, she felt disgusted in her skin. She cast her eyes down away from the mirror in horror and shame. She then remembered her mother’s words;

“You are nothing, you will be nothing. You look so disgusting that if I were you I will be afraid to look at myself in the mirror. No one will ever love you if you look like this, I am your mom but I am finding it difficult to look at your face every day. Even your dad feels the same way. You look like filth, that is why you go through with this surgery, so you will look more like me and beautiful”

Lilith body trembles, she felt so disgusted with her. She felt her mom was right she looks disgusting; the voices in her head kept reminding day and night that she was garbage itself. She felt ugly, her chest tightens, her stomach clench tightly. 

“No one will ever love you” the voice in her head said darkly

The tightening in her chest got more painful, the pounding in her head increased ten folds, her stomach felt like it was being twisted on the inside, sweating profusely

“You will never be enough, you are not good enough. You are pathetic, you are worthless and a waste of space” the voice in her head reminded her of the words that she was always told and believe in as a child.

Lilith grasp her neck struggling for oxygen, she stumbled on the floor having no strength in her legs anymore. Tugging her hair in a painful manner, she felt her body is on fire Tears falling endlessly. Gripping her knees to her chest and rocking herself back and forth like a child, she keep murmuring to herself ‘you are alright; you have to be strong for William, do it for William’.

After what felt like eternity, Lilith felt she could breathe again. She struggled but finally got on her feet, dusted her clothes and straightened her hair, still not looking at herself in the mirror. Putting a smile on her face, She got her school back and walks out the door to the dining. 

                     / / /

Reaching the dinning, Lilith saw John, Samantha and William were already seated with their breakfast placed in front of them. Lilith looked at her parents with hate that burn so deep, "if they could just die" the dark side of her mind uttered.

“Lily come and eat your food will get cold” Lilith was brought out of her dark thoughts when she heard her brother’s voice. Drawn of her dark thoughts, she looked over and saw that her brother was looking at her puzzled. But she just returned it with a smile and took a sit

“William you are such a brat! Why must you behave in such undignified manner, you should be ashamed of yourself” Samantha scolded her son giving him a glare. John turned a blind eye but look at his wife loving.

“That’s so rich coming from a woman like you Samantha; you talk about manner when you lack one yourself”

Word count:1064