My Addiction

chapter nineteen

Jessie's POV

" These things are just too much to take, how many bags do we have to fill?" Tricia complained as we packed her the clothes she bought

"you could always leave some you know"

I cushioned her " it's not like I'm going to wear them"

" well right, I would believe that if we didn't wear the same size. I'm taking all my things"

" then get packing and stop complaining, they won't pack themselves. Why don't we just let the maids do it? It's been an exhausting day we need some rest" I don't like overworking my employees but at the time, I was more than exhausted so I had to resort to extreme measures

" no, we will just do it ourselves" she protested

" Okay then, shut up, and let's get to work. You know we are going to pack my things too right? I'll be going on a business trip for two weeks" I told her as I took another suitcase to pack away some more clothes

" are you taking him along with you?" she asked out of the blue. I gave her questioning a look " oh come on you know who I'm talking about?"

" oh, Ryan you mean? of course, I'm taking him, he is my assistant after all,"

I shrug it off

" mmm, sure he is, I'm certain he'll keep you entertained" she winked at me

" it's more than just entertainment you know?" I told her. she gave me a stern look that reminded me of how mom used to look at me whenever I did something wrong. she sat on the bed and mentioned to me to sit next to her

" then why is it still a secret? one might think it's just a fling or something"

" I don't know for sure, I can't say he's the only one holding back. just imagine the stain that will leave in my name and his"

" and you think that stain is not the already? have you ever thought that maybe it's worse now than it would be if you just came out?" she had a point I don't think any of us thought about it from that perspective.

" I'll try to bring it up and see what he'll say, I don't think he'll oppose it though"

" you never know, one might get used to the present situation that they would not see the need to take things further anymore," that hit me so hard I wasn't sure of myself, I thought I didn't want to go public about it but the thought of just being a fling, a plaything hurt so much I couldn't bear it. now that I think of it, maybe I was just fooling myself thinking I would settle to just be someone's secret but then again he was mine too and I don't blame him as much as I don't blame myself for it.

" Jessie , you there?" Tricia says waving her hand, I jolted at that " girl, what's the matter with you? Are you sure you are fine?"

" Yeah, why?" I ask her

" you had zoned out for a long minute there I was beginning to worry. I didn't know it was that sensitive a topic to you but I needed to make sure you were fine with the way things are rolling and by the looks of it, you are not, so spill it"

" it's not what you think, you know very well there is no possible way he would have forced me to stay silent, we kind of came to that agreement together I told you that earlier on. I think I have outgrown that idea, now that you speak of it, I know I want more than to just be someone's secret. No wonder people are starting to undermind my authority, they think I'm having a dirty fling with my assistant" I release a heavy sigh at that, it wasn't easy to let it out and I'm glad I did

" no you are not, don't think like that, what does it matter what they think?"

" of course it does, they are my people, my employees, and they think me a hoe and I brought that on myself, all because I wanted to protect my reputation. I even ended up tainting it more"

" it's not a big deal you can fix it, I'm sure Ryan won't mind " she tried to console me " I don't like it when you are sad so come on let's get this done with and get some coffee or take walk in the terrace, maybe sit by the swimming pool and relax. what do you think?" what did I ever do to deserve such a great friend? I don't know

" anything you want T, we can even do all of them. starting with coffee of cause "

After what seemed like forever, we had finished packing both her stuff and mine. we had talked about a lot of things including how we would deal with Mark, Hopes dad, it was a relief as we could talk about it with less tension now. I know it's a very sensitive topic so I'm conscious whenever I bring it up, it was a matter of urgency and we need to take care of it as soon as possible before it gets out of hand.

we finished with our coffee and decided to go no a walk

" don't forget mom said you should visit sometime " she remembered me as we made a turn to come back as it was getting dark

" Yeah, I'll make sure to turn up when I'm free, let's say in three weeks or so?"

" okay, that sounds awesome, I'll let her know I'm sure she'll be excited to hear that"

" so, what do you have in mind?" I asked her seeing as she was quiet for a bit

" I want to take that son of a bumpkin to court"

" mm, great idea"