A Borderline Life.

Unexpected surprises.

I grew up thinking that there was no such thing as love. My mom and dad had their good times, but they had many more bad then good.

There was fighting, throwing things and just all-over hatred in my house as a kid sometimes. Let’s be realistic, it was daily. Not sometimes.

So I grew up thinking that I would never be able to fall in love because there was no such thing as love or if there was a such thing as love I did not want to be in it because it did NOT look fun.

I remember growing up, waking up to breaking dishes and glasses or having to run from the room to dodge something big. My mom had a good arm.

My mom is a pathological liar. I still can’t help but love her because she is my mom. But I don’t like the way that she treated my dad when I was growing up and I don’t like the way that she treated me growing up. I thought she changed because she seemed like she would treat me better and she seemed like she actually cared as I got older. Which is why I became closer to her. But because of all of her lying, I was very wrong about thinking these things.

Don’t get me wrong, my dad isn’t totally innocent in all of this but my mom did a lot more mentally than my dad did to everyone. My dad liked to be the peacekeeper, he liked to make sure everybody was OK, happy and taken care of. But my mother wanted to make sure that everybody was well taken care of materialistically.

My dad is the farthest thing from materialistic. My mom, not so much.

My dad came from a very poor native family. Whereas my mom came from a middle class white family.

It made things hard.

Not many people in my town like interracial couples. So growing up on that front was tough enough on its own.

I find that I’ve always been more like my dad in that way. I like to make sure everybody is peaceful, happy and well taken care of in the way of feeling loved.

I’ve always been less like my mom. But alas, she is still my mother.

My siblings are very judgemental and can be major assholes sometimes. Moreso then average siblings.

Anyways, being like my dad, We both have the same outlook on life. Do your best, stick with your gut and be happy in life.

My mom isn’t like this and that’s why I think I’ve grown so close to my dad and my mom didn’t like that.

My mom always acted very jealous about how much attention my dad would give me and how much attention my dad would get from me because we were just very close and had a lot in common. For example, I love cars and he is a mechanic he has taught me everything about cars from changing a tire to changing the oil.

My dad has probably taught me in my life many more things than my mother ever has.

I still can’t help but love them both. And miss my mom.

William reminded me of my dad in a way. He’s a gentleman. William is like me and should’ve been born in a different era. Maybe the 50s.

He has long beautiful luscious red hair. He is very tall. Very skinny. And tucks his shirt in. He loves wearing rings, he likes to slick his hair back, and he loves leather jackets. He's kind of like an old time greaser.

Man is he ever sexy.

“Earth to Amanda!! Hahaha Are you daydreaming? That’s adorable” he teased.

“Oh shut up!! Hahaha just thinking” I smiled.

He pulled out a quarter.

“Quarter for your thoughts?” He asked.

“Woah, big spender! Not much just thinking about my dad. He’s like my best friend and I wouldn’t be here without him. Just reminiscing I guess. What are you thinking about?”

“Oh just about you” he smirked, then winked!

“Oh okay.” I blushed wondering what he was thinking about me for. “Good things I hope” I joked.

“Always” he replied quietly.

I was starting to get really tired and it was super late. I got up to walk William out. He had to get home to his dog Charlotte.

“I had fun tonight. Thank you for coming and staying with me for a bit. I feel like so much better.” I said honestly.

“Im so happy to hear that. I had fun too” he yawned. “Alright Darlyn. It’s been a slice But I have to head out do you mind if I text you tomorrow?”

“Of course William anytime!” I smiled.

I opened the door to the cool night air and walked onto the porch with him just behind. I turned around and noticed he was checking out my butt.

I broke down laughing so hard. I laughed so hard and so much I almost peed.

I felt rediculous but I couldn’t stop laughing.

William was so red but giggling himself.

“I’m so sorry” I said between giggles. “It wasn’t expected!!” I giggled.

“I love your laugh.”

And just like that, he leant in, puckered up and laid a big ole kiss on these surprised lips..