Crush

Chapter 13

" So what happened?" I asked squeezing the carton of juice in my hand.

He grunted softly staring down at the packet of crisps in his hand.

We were sat side by side in the gym, watching other people outside play games and tease each other.

It had been a week since I made up with my boyfriend and every day since... Issy and I had been spending lunch together.

That probably meant he had to tell mike and Jay he was hanging out with a girl. I didn't mind since he made a significant promise to me.

" She didn't really say anything" he exhaled, quickly crunching on some crisps.

I frowned realising... Him coming out to his mom maybe... Did not go as well.

He reached into the packet for another pinch of crisps fumbling with the packet but I could only hear my heart pound for him.

" Wait... So what happened... she didn't like... Disown you or something did she!?"

He chuckled all of a sudden looking up at me with a fond expression.

" Nah. We just hugged."

Woah.

He smirked to himself focusing down on his crisps.

" Yeah she hugged me for a bit and then.... She kinda said something along the lines of:

It doesn't matter. Being gay isn't a disease, it isn't a personality thing. Its just how lucky you are to find someone who loves you just as much as you love them "

He frowned at me seemingly confused about his moms words.

I exhaled deeply " You are so lucky!"

He grunted to himself " So. What about you? What happened when you came out to your mom."

My stomach twisted sharply and I tried to remember how that had happened.

Oh right...

Even now... I felt like I was working up a sweat. I practically forgot where I was for a moment till Ysander rubbed his thumb over my hand with a frown.

" Hey... Its okay."

I slurped hard on the carton breathing in.

" You don't have to tell me. You look scared s**t-less."

I exhaled " I wanna tell you!"

I stared down at the orange juice in my hands.

" My mom and dad hated each other. They got together because at one point they worked well. But apparently they never really opened up to each other. Dad found someone else. He wanted an ordinary relationship. Mom called them a waste of time. She treats me like I am one too."

I blinked up at him and he seemed uncomfortable already.

I grinned " That's not even the story behind my coming out."

At that moment the bell rang signifying the end of lunch.

I began packing up but Ysander huffed " I'm not leaving till I know every last detail. I wanna know what happened... So I can make sure it never does again. I couldn't care less if people called me a fag, Taylor... But if they said something like that to you... I'd make sure they felt terrible about it!"

I smiled up at him. I wish I didn't have to remember this horrible stuff. I wish I didn't have nightmares and I wish it didn't bother me now.

I exhaled " Okay. I'll risk detention for you."

He chuckled squeezing my hand softly.

I cleared my throat.

" I was in... Year seven. Just got into secondary school. And there was this guy who was super popular. Jayden Hughes.

He was a pretty nice guy. He got along with everybody and because of him... The whole class was like this big friendship group. Regardless I was the shy one in class. The girls all openly talked about liking him. I didn't say a word. But one day I wrote him a letter and left it on his desk before he got in.

I was so nervous watching as he came in and moved past me to the back of the class. Till he was sat right behind me.

Turns out... His friend Marcus stole the letter and teased him about it... And then he started reading it out."

I squeezed the carton in my hands feeling sick.

" Uh... I didn't exactly get a chance to come out to anybody. Because suddenly I started earning enemies like it was nothing.

It started with him. He stopped being as nice. He started being quieter, colder and just plain angrier. That annoyed the teachers who got irritated and treated the rest of the class like crap too. The girls started blaming it on me. The guys started picking on me.

I didn't have a chance to come out in a safe place because the news spread like a disease and everyone made it a reason to... Lock me in uncomfortable places and shove me around. Steal my stuff. That kind of thing.

Then at one point They started following me home. I would get chased. They would throw stuff at the house. Mom was confused about it but turns out she knew too. The principle had told her I had made myself " A problem" to the school.

My mom tried transferring me but at that point the whole f*****g area knew that I wrote a love letter to a guy! The other school wasn't as old fashioned. Its where I met Pete. Pete wanted to look out for me. But he couldn't do that when the football team picked on me, for the sake of his reputation.

Again kids followed me home. It got to the point I skipped school and flunked so many exams but...."

I swallowed hard.

" Even people on the street stopped saying hello, good morning... And just spat venom under their breaths"

My body had gone cold as I shivered.

So it was nice when Ysander wrapped his arm around me, resting his head on my shoulder.

" f**k. Youre... So strong babe."

I pressed a kiss to his forehead as a silent thank you.

He held onto my hands as I sighed.

" When mom moved us here. It was because she found another job... To be honest people had been treating her like crap at work cause her kid was a little queer.

The first thing she told me since the move... The first thing she told me when we got here was: I hope you learned your mistake. Words can ruin lives. In the countryside people are nice, but I don't want news of you all over town that your hooking up with old poofs. "

I glanced down at my boyfriend who was petting at me softly. His head still resting on my shoulder.

He exhaled sitting up before smiling at me.

" This time around... Let's go cause trouble... Together."

I smiled back at him " You're amazing you know that, Prince of 11S?"

He grinned brightly.