46Sydney 2002 James was unsure how many days after the surgery he awoke. His conscious world was tubes, pain, and strange and familiar faces running together in a yellowy-grey montage. Reality flooded forth and receded just as quickly again. “James, James,” he heard whispered in his ears. He saw Jenny’s tearful, concerned face. He squeezed the fingers he felt clutching anxiously to his own. The corners of his mouth lifted tentatively into a smile before the hazy wave of unconsciousness swept over him again. His next waking sensations were an awareness of the shallowness of his breathing and the sharp stab of pain in his chest when he moved, coughed or tried to breathe a little deeper. He tried not to make a noise when the pain hit. He tried to remember not to do anything that brought it

