Angel On Fire

Chapter Five

I waited outside Eloise's house, right by her car so that straight from here we could head for the restaurant. I was anticipating this moment. I really wanted to be right, and as much as that, I really wanted him to be working today. If he wasn't, it would be a royal f**k up. If I could feel anything, I would have felt sorely disappointed. If he wasn't there though, I wouldn't let it go. I would track him down. I knew it sounded very stalkerish, but I had no other way. This was my last hope.

"Ready?" Eloise came out of her house and I nodded my head.

"More than." I said. I had been waiting for this my entire life.

~~~

We arrived at the restaurant and I hopped out of the car. I wished there were things I could have felt on a moment like this. I should have been feeling nervous or anxious even, but I was feeling none of that. I was just yearning to figure this all out. I was yearning for answers. I was yearning to just have an emotion to feel.

"Do you want me to ask for him?" She asked me and I shook my head. I needed to do this alone, but with her support of course.

"Table for two?" A woman asked as we got inside and I shook my head. I wasn't about to waste anytime.

"Hi there, is Luke working today?" I asked her and she looked at me questionably.

"Who are you?" It seemed that by the look on her face, she had attachments to him that was more than just a co-worker. I didn't care. I just wanted to know where he was.

"Is he working today?" I pushed further. This had nothing to do with her, and I wasn't going to let her stop me from doing what I came here for.

"Miss-"

"I asked a question." I was getting highly irritated with this woman. She seemed taken aback at my reaction and looked down. I didn't know what I did, if it was something on my face or in my eyes, but she looked afraid. I didn't mean to do that.

"He's not working today, but if it's really important, I can tell you where to find him." She said and I groaned in frustration. I wasn't in the mood to run around town looking for him, but I would do it anyway.

"Okay, where?" Eloise spoke up for me.

"Do you know where Blue Birds is?" She asked. Blue Birds was a famous bar downtown. It was very expensive to get in and I was growing more and more frustrated, because I didn't have any money on me. I hoped that Eloise did.

"Yes." I said.

"He works there part-time as a bartender. Just ask for him." I refrained from showing anymore of my frustration and I nodded my head at her. There were certain things that I could feel. That was only frustration. I didn't know where it came from or if maybe I was doing it subconsciously, but I had seemed to master it from young when I would try and feel emotions and I couldn't and the only thing that would come up was frustration. Frustration for the fact that I would be deemed a constant useless asset to my family and to society.

"Thank you." I said before turning back to Eloise. We began to walk out of the restaurant and I huffed.

"What's wrong?" She asked me.

"I don't have any money on me." I told her and she smiled gently at me.

"It's okay, I do." God, I loved Eloise so much. I'd be dead without her.

~~~

"I'm looking for Luke." I said to one of the bartenders and suddenly a man walked out. A man I was familiar with. I swallowed hard. The feelings weren't as potent, and there was no light around me. But I was feeling something. I was feeling the things around me. I was feeling energies circulating me and things around me started changing from a dullness to a reality I had never seen before. It was a reality. Everything around me looked so, real. It looked beautiful.

Oh my God. It looked beautiful. It looked real.

I was right. It was him. My theory was correct. I didn't know what I was feeling. I was feeling happy. I felt excitment. Oh my God, I felt excitement and happiness. I wanted to run around and jump from the rooftops and laugh. I wanted to share this feeling with the entire world.

I couldn't believe it.

"I heard my name." He said and suddenly I felt really confused. Another feeling I wasn't familiar with. I knew how to tell which feelings were which, because I wasn't an i***t. I couldn't believe I was finally feeling, but right now that didn't matter. What mattered was, how could a complete stranger be doing this to me? Who was he?

"Hi, I'm Molly." I said and his gaze flipped to me. He didn't look surprised. It was as if he knew that I was here. Strangely enough, I was feeling a new feeling. A feeling I knew from books and from Eloise. It resembled that of attraction. He definitely was an attractive man. He was slender with broad shoulders and very floppy light brown hair. It could've been just me, but at the restaurant I was so sure that his eyes were a dark brown. Now, they were blue. I must've made a mistake.

"Is it him?" Eloise whispered soft enough for me to hear only. I smiled and nodded my head. I didn't know what to make of any of this. I didn't know how to process it. It felt like I had felt like this my entire life. It strangely enough didn't feel new to me. As if I wasn't a stranger to emotions at all. This was so f*****g weird.

"How may I be of service to you, Molly?" He looked at me with a smirk, and I didn't know what that feeling was exactly, but I felt it somewhere in the region of my core. I had to figure out how to make this work, because I couldn't tell him the truth. That wouldn't make any sense to him, and quite frankly, it could scare him away. I had to lie. I had to pretend. I was just thinking of what to make up.

One thing I knew about myself, is that I wasn't an unattractive person. I had a way with me and for some reason, I attracted a lot of guys. I had never felt anything towards any of them. That was until I met this man, which I was still trying to figure out how any of it made sense.

There was only one way out of this. I had to flirt and I had to flirt hard.

"I remember you from the resturaunt." I said and his smirk faltered. He suddenly looked nervous. Then, as quick as it came, it disappeared. He stood up right and his smirk returned. That was rather strange, but I chose not to dwell on it.

"You're the girl who had that-"

"I prefer not to remember it actually." I said and he laughed. He had such a pretty laugh as well as a beautiful smile. He had such a pretty face.

God, what was happening to me?

"Fair enough." He nodded his head. I noticed Eloise looking at me with a look of absolute shock on her face. I'd expect nothing less from her in a situation like this. I felt shocked at the way my mind, body and soul was reacting to this man and the way he made me react to the world around me. It had to be him. There was no other reason that I only felt like this when he was around. Even if it was only two times.

"I thought you were really cute, but then you dissapeared." I said and I heard Eloise laugh in complete shock and I nudged her a little bit. Now wasn't the time. We could do this once we arrived at her house.

What scared me was that, would this be over once I arrived at home? I didn't want it to be. I really, really didn't want it to be. I had been waiting for this moment my entire life.

"Well, that is my bad. Look, how about this? I have to see to customers. How about I give you my number and you call me sometime?" This all seemed to be going exactly as I planned. I didn't know if it lead me one step closer to the answers I was looking for, but I hoped it did. I didn't know how long this would take until it all started falling together, but I hoped it'd be soon.

Maybe, I was just very different and maybe I wasn't like people who could lead their own lives and feel their own emotions. I wondered if it could be possible that I needed someone to make me feel things and that maybe - if Eloise's theory was right - it could be a soul connection.

Yes, it was a bit deep for my liking, but it was the only thing that was making sense to me right now.

"Okay." I said and I handed him my phone. This was too easy. Maybe way too easy.

I hoped that it wouldn't end once I got home. I just wanted to be a human being. I just wanted to feel like one. I wanted to feel like this forever and the truth was, that I was selfish and I'd do absolutely anything it took to be able to feel something like this for the rest of my life. Even if it meant bringing somebody that I didn't even know into the whirlpool with me.