Outside In

Chapter 1 Cameron didn’t move as the door of the van opened beside her. She steeled herself for what was going to happen next, realizing how tensely she’d sat during the long ride. This was the real beginning! Her stomach was jumping with excitement and exhilaration, but there was one little part of her, centered right below her esophagus, that was scared to death. And though she hadn’t been inside a church since her grandfather’s funeral five years earlier, she suddenly wanted to pray: “Dear God, don’t let me forget everything I’ve been taught!” They were inside the garage. The huge steel door was lowered behind the van and the heavy clank of the locks sliding into place was all too loud. It didn’t seal out the oppressive heat and humidity of the late July day. The stale air of the oil-smeared cavern seemed to hold the heat and magnify its misery. Silently, she stared forward, unconsciously fingering the short loop of chain that shackled her wrists to the chain around her waist, her one sign of nervousness. “Come on, hot shot, move it out. We ain’t got all day.” The guard stood back, her hand resting loosely on her holstered revolver, waiting for Cam to exit the police van that had brought her and two other women from the City of Baltimore to their new home, Hagerville State Correctional Facility for Women. Cameron swung her legs over the side of the bench seat and hopped to the ground, careful not to trip on the ankle chains. She stretched her back slightly to release the tension. After the two other women had alighted from the van, the second guard, the driver, motioned them through the first set of steel-barred doors, his shotgun securely in hand. Cam let the two other women go before her. The first one strode forward as best she could with the ankle shackles confining her movements. Her attitude seemed to imply there was nothing to worry about. Cam could tell that this wasn’t her first time in prison. The second woman, though, was more tentative, her eyes wide. She was scared. Cam gave her a reassuring wink, then followed her as the guards nudged them forward. When all three were inside the small entryway, the doors slammed and locked with a heavy clang behind them. Then the iron door in front slid open to where three more guards waited for them. “Small litter this time,” the first guard inside observed, eyeing the three women who stood before him in blue coveralls marked with the “City of Baltimore” logo. “Any trouble makers?” he asked, taking the set of files that the van driver handed him through the glassed window next to the gate. “Nah, gentle as lambs,” the driver replied, watching the guard sign the transfer papers that released Cameron, Sharon, and Donna into prison custody. “But this one,” he continued, pointing toward Cameron with the butt of his rifle, “seems to have an attitude.” Shit, she thought, here it comes. It’s starting already. Cameron checked her reaction, trying to keep her expression impassive as she continued to stare straight ahead. “This a tough one?” the first guard asked, thumbing through the files. He stopped as he came to the one with Cam’s picture stapled to the front. Next to the picture, someone had handwritten a large capital “L” in red marker pen. “Oh, another bulldyke,” he chuckled as he opened the file, knowing the “L” stood for “Lesbian,” and scanned her rap sheet. Surprised by what he read, he let out a low whistle as he brought his gaze up to Cam’s face. “A cop!” he smiled. “We don’t get many bad lady cops in here. Oh, we’re gonna have a good time.” He closed the file and handed them to his partner. “Well, Detective Sergeant Andrews,” he sneered, walking up to Cam, so close that she could smell the cup of coffee he’d just chugged. “Welcome to Hagerville’s House of Ladies. I think you’re going to be very happy here.” He waited. Cam just stood there, stolidly, hoping that her silence would keep him from pushing harder, but knowing that it probably wouldn’t. “Well, don’t you want to be happy here?” he continued. Cam finally looked him in the eye. “I’d rather be happy somewhere else,” she said, her voice low. “Oh, you’ll change your mind,” he promised. “You’ll learn to love it here. You won’t be able to imagine being anywhere else. I should think you’d be real excited to be shacked up with three-hundred fifty other girls.” He stepped back with a broad smile on his face and motioned down the corridor that ended at a thick iron-barred gate. “Now, you three little ladies move your pretty butts down there and we’ll see that you get a nice little welcome party.” He pressed a button, one of several on a long wall panel. It sounded a warning buzzer further inside the prison. “Here,” he said, putting out his hand to stop Cam as she started past. “You take these with you,” he said, handing her the files, “and be real careful not to damage them. No telling what might happen if one of these precious files got all bent out of shape.” He smiled broadly as Cam took the files and started after her two companions. “Bastard,” Donna whispered under her breath as they neared the end of the hall. “I’m prepared for it,” Cam answered. “No talking!” came a barked order from behind Cameron. At the end of the corridor, they were met by three stern and bored looking guards, all female. “Well, well, well. If it isn’t Donna Trachner,” the first guard greeted them, looking happily at Donna, from behind the gate. “Welcome back, girl. I knew you couldn’t bear to be without us. What you in for this time?” “Same ol’ same old,” Donna said. She had been arrested for prostitution and for robbing the johns she picked up. This was her third or fourth time in prison. “How you doing, Dee? Miss me?” “Oh, you bet, Sugar Bumps,” Dee smiled. “Missed you a lot. Things are really quiet without you. I’m glad you’re back. Who’d you bring with you?” Donna shrugged. “Hand me your files!” the second guard ordered, obviously not in the mood for casual conversation. “Sorry we can’t spend more time on this blessed reunion.” Cam held out the files as far as the shackles would allow her to stretch her arm. As the guard took them, she acknowledged the male guard who had escorted the women, then pushed yet another button that slid the heavy door back. “Come on inside, ladies.” As it slid back, Donna led the way through into the next corridor, which was painted in the same gunmetal grey as the last hallway, with its grey cement floors. The door closed behind them with another heavy thud. Without taking her eyes off the files she was now perusing, the guard, whose name badge read “M. Emerson,” addressed the other two guards. “Take them and get their processing started. See if Dr. Keystone is ready to examine them yet.” As Cam started past her, M. Emerson put out a hand to stop her. Not any taller than Cam, Emerson outweighed her by a good sixty pounds and whether Cam wanted to or not, she felt intimidated by the cold, hard authoritarian look on her face. Cam waited as Emerson’s eyes ran the full length of her, from her head to her feet. Having obviously passed the inspection, Cam was allowed to continue. “Be wary of this one,” Emerson warned the guard who waited to escort Cam, “Ex-cop.” Cam sighed as the guard took her forcefully by the arm and pushed her forward. This was not going to be a good day.