Flashbacks: Head Versus Heart

Chapter Thirteen: Make a Decision

I thought a lot about my recent decisions, the things that Colt had said to me, and the last two years of my life. I reflected on Reece and how I felt overwhelmed by him at first, he was so attractive I couldn't stop gawking at him. He was elegantly bronzed, with a graciously trimmed stubble – with deep blue eyes that I knew I could be hypnotized by if given the chance. He was regal, classy, and the very definition of handsome. 

I drifted off in thought memorizing the first time we met, wondering why I dismissed him as something more than a casual friend. He was attractive, successful, and much older than I was. I couldn't put a finger on why I never realized this before. When we met; he told me he was looking for someone with similar interests as he had... comedy, hiking, cats, and traveling. He wanted to find someone who pursued success as a priority just as he had. The fact that he was so established in who he was, was such a striking quality.

Just then, a deer darted out in front of me, snapping me back to reality as I lightly tapped the brakes. "Whoaaaa, little guy. " I mumbled to myself. I needed to focus on driving and not let myself be distracted by my mundane dramatics of single life. As soon as pulled closer to downtown, I took in the aesthetic of the area. This time of year, was so beautiful for Owlville. The flowers in full bloom, the tree blossoms swaying in the gentle breeze of Summer. I parked my care in front of the café, Fawn's. I parked next to Vera, so I knew she was already there. I almost felt a wave of guilt wash over me as I walked up to the door. In the end, Colt was her brother, her loyalties lie with him.

"Hey!" I heard her gleeful voice as she stood up, and walked over to the door, and wrapped me into a tight embrace. "I got here a little early to catch up on some work with my Summer classes, so let me move some things! How are you?"

"I'm great. " I smiled widely at her, hiding my internal debate of lust or love.

"I'm sorry I ended up working – and then... Chris and I had some things to talk about. "

"Everything okay, Vera?" I noticed the look of agony in her eyes, that she had attempted to hide with a crooked smile.

"Yes... and no... it's all really complicated right now..." As she said that, I saw a tear stream out of her eye, which she immediately caught with the sleeve of her cardigan.

"Vera... what's going on?" I pressed on.

"Well, promise me you won't say anything to Colt. " I nodded in agreement as she continued, "I'm pregnant... I found out the other night at work, and I needed to spend some time with Chris and let him know what was going on. I was super worried someone would see me not drinking at Tommy's party, so I bailed on going. "

I was shocked. I didn't know how to respond. Someone as responsible as Vera, I knew this was gutting her. She wanted a family, but she's also excelling in med school, and she and Chris have been less than stable. "How did Chris react?"

"He still wants to get married soon, he's happy. He wants us to be a family. "

"That's fantastic! Why are you so sad?"

"My parents are going to be livid. They have my whole life planned out for me – finish Med School, get married, maybe have a kid if that fits the plan."

"Vera. This is your life. You need to stop putting so much stress on yourself to live up to their expectations of you."

"You're right... I'm really worried about everything. Chris has been amazing through it all, and I'm so glad you're here so I can tell you in person!"

I hugged her tightly, so she knew I reciprocated the appreciation of being there with her. My stress and life woes seemed so mundane compared to that of what Vera was facing. On one aspect, I see that she is an adult, we aren't children anymore, yet in the same breath I can see why she is afraid to disappoint her parents, and herself. She's worked so hard to get to where she is in life, and now that hard work will be set aside so she can start a family. I had always wanted to be so sure of someone that I knew they were the one, that I could start a life with, and be married to, forever, raising children that looked like the two of us, swirled together.