Forbidden Baby

Chapter 10 – Alone

Thia’s POV

As I took in my surroundings, the place seemed like a home from home, I was expecting it to be different, although I am not sure how. In my head, I was being taken to a prison! The upper level of the house was divided into small flats.

I was currently in mine. It had one bedroom, a bathroom, a small kitchen, and a lounge. It wasn’t very big, but it didn’t need to be. It was plainly decorated and had all the basics I would need.  It was more than I ever had at home, and I knew I would be comfortable here.

I figured, that in a way, being here and getting through this alone was probably a better option than being smothered at home by my parents. I tried not to think about what would happen after I have my baby.

I knew I had to stick to the rules, and I wasn’t stupid enough to think they wouldn’t carry out their threat, so I had every intention of abiding by them. Only, I didn’t want to give my baby up at all. It was something I was going to have to come to terms with though.

I would never be allowed to keep her; they would make sure of it. As I looked out of the window in the lounge in my new accommodation, it was all I could think about while I waited for my parents to return. I tried to hold back the tears. I didn’t want them to see my weakness.  

There was a knock on the door which startled me, I turned and walked to the front door, which looked exactly like that of a proper house and opened it, curiously.

Mrs. Radcliffe smiled ‘Don’t look so surprised Tabitha, this is your home now, we wont just walk in! But I would advise, when you are out, you lock it and when you are in, you put the latch on’ she pointed to the latch on the back of the inside of the door ‘Treat it as you home’

Mum and Dad stood behind her looking at me with distain, but they soon change the expression on their faces as Mrs. Radcliffe turned to them ‘You weren’t wrong about her being quiet, were you?’ she lightly laughed.

They both gave her a small smile ‘I know she will settle here’ my Mum seemed unusually calm and collected as she spoke to Mrs Radcliffe about the current situation. It was a little unnerving.

‘Don’t worry, she is in good hands here, I will leave you to say your goodbyes, and when you are ready, just follow the corridor back to the stairs and you will know where you are. Remember, she has a personal landline phone in her apartment, so you can call whenever you like, but any visitors must be announced prior to coming’

Mum and Dad thanked her for her time, and she left. They walked into the apartment silently.

‘Seems you have almost everything you need’ Mum said as she looked around ‘your father and I are going to go into the city now to get you the things Mrs. Radcliffe has advised. We will get you some basic food supplies and then you are on your own. We have agreed a reasonable food shopping budget and it will be given to you by her once a week. Use it wisely Tabitha, there will be no more’

‘Okay, Thanks Mum’ I was genuinely grateful I wasn’t completely left high and dry.

She didn’t seem angry, just defeated, I guess. I could imagine how much this was all costing. I dreaded to think what they would do when they found out I was actually a month less pregnant than I said I was. That would be another month of bills to pay.

I was beginning to feel guilty about what I was putting them through, but apart of me also thought, that if they had let me stay at home, this would all be avoided, this wasn’t my choice after all, it was theirs.

‘Ok then. Let’s get this over with’ Dad pulled me out of my reprieve.

I briefly wondered if he meant the shopping or saying goodbye to me, but I didn’t have time to ponder too long, as he and Mum walked back to the front door and left without so much as a goodbye or see you later.

A few minutes later, there was another knock on the door. I was tired and just wanted to rest, but I knew it would be Lilly, ready to show me around.

‘Hi Tabitha, are you ready for your tour?’ she smiled warmly, I liked her.

‘Sure’ I tried to smile back, but with my anxiety consuming me, I knew it looked more like grimace.

‘It really is nice here; you’ll soon settle in’ I edged out of the door and turned to lock the door as Mrs. Radcliffe had advised.

Lilly took me to the other side of the corridor and showed me one of the empty apartments that I assumed I should have been in. It was the shared accommodation for the pregnant girls. She explained where I was, was usually only for girls who had had their babies.

They were almost identical to my apartment, but with two bedrooms and slightly bigger communal areas with basic kitchen supplies, a table, and chairs, tv with basic channels, and a phone.

In these apartments, the girls shared, allowing them to have company during their pregnancy and helped them not feel alone. I was jealous, but I tried not to show it, I wish my parents had allowed me to have company. I already felt isolated.

‘Most girls stay on for at least a month and move into one of our independent mother and baby units. But as requested by your parents, you are already in one, so will stay where you are after your baby is born. We will make sure you have everything you need for when you return with your baby, and we will help you settle into a new routine and make sure you can cope when you leave. We also have classes for bathing, feeding, changing, soothing etc which will all help’

‘Okay’ I nodded, understanding but finding it difficult to process everything that was going on.

We left the apartment, and she locked its front door. We walked down the corridor and down the stairs. She showed me to the other rooms on the ground floor. Pointing out Mrs. Radcliffe’s office, some toilets, a large computer room used for teaching and a large room filled with baby equipment and lastly a communal kitchen.

‘We have cooking lessons in here’ she smiled as we went into the reasonably size kitchen area ‘I will make you a sandwich, it’s way passed lunch time and I am sure you are hungry! I should have offered sooner’ she seemed a little annoyed with herself.

‘Actually, that sounds good, I am quite hungry’ I hadn’t realised how hungry I was until she mentioned food. She smiled as I spoke, I guess it was because it was the most, I had said all day. I was still struggling to form coherent sentences.

She made me us both a cheese, salad, sandwich, and we sat on stools at the centre reservation and ate as she continued to tell me more about the place and what was going to happen over the next few days.

‘You will be introduced to the other girls tomorrow and your lessons will commence on Monday. We have your schooling schedule, and you will do most of your work online, we will have the curriculum you were working from by then, so, your schooling shouldn’t be interrupted. We also have mandatory classes in the afternoons, for cooking, basic living, budgeting, and prenatal care etc’

‘Do you live here?’ I asked.

She seemed to like my question, or maybe just that I had relaxed enough to ask one. Although I was far from relaxed, my curiosity did get the better of me in this instance.

‘Yes, but not in the house, I have a small cottage on site’ we had finished our lunch and we walked to the back gardens. At the very bottom to the right was a small cottage partially hidden by a stone wall ‘I work odd hours, so it makes sense for me to be onsite’

‘Is it just you and Mrs. Radcliffe?’ it seemed odd for there to only be the two of them.

She laughed ‘Oh, no! But my job is a little different to everyone else’s, I work unusual hours. You will meet the others on Monday, they don’t work weekends’ I just nodded.

She finished telling me everything I needed to know, and she walked me back up to my apartment, it was getting late.

‘Oh’ was all I could say as I saw a box of groceries and a bag of clothes on my doorstep.

‘Looks like your parents stopped by while we were out’ she said with a look in her eye I couldn’t quite decipher.

‘Looks like it’ I was strangely saddened that they hadn’t bothered to say goodbye.

I mean, they were tyrants, I disliked them and in the last 24 hours I had put them through their worst nightmare, but they were still my parents, I still loved them in my own way, and I thought they loved me.

Now I wasn’t so sure, I mean, they just left without saying goodbye. I looked in the bag hoping for a note, but there was nothing. I unlocked the front door and Lilly helped me bring in the box of food while I collected the bag.

She left after making sure I was okay, and I suddenly felt so completely alone. The silence was deafening, so I put on the tele just for background noise as I put away the basic food supplies, they had got me.

It really was basic, I don’t know what I was expecting, but there was enough to see me through a few days at least. I hope my weekly budget wasn’t unbearable, they hadn’t told me what they had agreed.

I tipped the bag of clothes on the small sofa and looked through them. They were obviously from a second-hand store, and there wasn’t much, but I wasn’t about to complain, at least they would be more comfortable than the too small clothes I was currently in.

I made myself something small to eat and took a shower before getting into an oversized T-shirt and snuggled into the freshly made bed. I was exhausted, it had been such a long day. I closed my eyes ready to sleep, but my mind wouldn’t shut down, trying to process the day.

It had been a little over 24 hours since they found out I was pregnant, and already they had me shipped out of the house, essentially ridding me from their life and had found someone to adopt my unborn child.

I found the last part more intriguing, could they really find someone so quickly? I mean, I know many childless couples were desperate for a baby, but I wasn’t so sure finding one to go ahead with an adoption could happen so fast!

Was that even possible?

Mum and Dad had confused me with their approach. The disgust and upset I was expecting but the calm and gentle persuasion, I was not. I couldn’t decide if that was just to get me to play by the rules or because they genuinely had my best interests at heart.

Either way it didn’t matter, it wasn’t going to change anything, and I was going to do what they asked, because if it gave me any chance to be apart of my baby’s life, then it would be worth it. But deep down, I still hoped that they would change their mind about the adoption.

Maybe after meeting her, they would fall in love with her too and If I could prove I could look after myself, and her and I could manage, I could convince them to let me keep her.

Eventually, I could no longer have a coherent thought as exhaustion took over and sleep consumed me.